Being On Her Best Behavior Makes Lili A Boring Girl.

“yes, c’mon — a, press a!” lili urges. yet, at his reluctance, she can only playfully roll her eyes, “alright, i’ll show you how it’s done.”

it was a gamble, doing so, having her character run across the screen towards one of the other trees — she presses the ‘a’ button, showing her character shake the tree in succession only for a green leaf to slowly drift to the ground. “see! you get cool rewards if you shake the trees.” pocketing the item, she uses the joycon to drag her character back down the screen.

returning back to where his character was standing, lili once again suggests for him to try it. “since i got a leaf — it’s probably some type of furniture. if you shake it, we’ll probably get some money!” 

it would be even better if it wasn’t money, but this lili neglects to say.

it was really a miracle that he got a contract since he pretty much didn’t know anything about those games he had been playing during the halloween party. Still, he played his part well, which led hyuk to that exact moment, when he was paired up with lili to play games and have the most fun of it.

looking to the side whenever she laughed at his ridiculous attempt to make his character go from one side to the other onscreen, hyuk went from his grumpy mode (because he hated losing to anything), to kind of chill, taking that opportunity to bond more with people and make the brand more interested on him. “press a, you said?”, he looked to the side, offering her a friendly smile, but trying to find any deceit in her eyes, “you press it first so i know you’re not trying to kill my kid out there!”

shen xiaoting

lili could only agree. animal crossing had always been advertised as an easy going slice of life type of game — no hard level, no cheat codes — that is until the new game on the switch had completely changed up the way they played and instead of being a mayor or a random villager of some honky-tonk town, you were now stranded on a base island with all the workings to make it your own. it had taken lili a long week to fully understand the mechanics but after that, everything was like clockwork — so, in kind, she could see where hyuk’s wariness of the game came from.

though, it did not stop her from wanting to push him into a pitfall. 

glancing at the screen, lili counts the branches that have fallen out of hyuk’s pockets and frowns, there was enough … but she was tempted to see him get stung by bees. it was all in the name of entertainment, anyways! hyuk would surely understand, right?

right!

“mm, i think we should try a couple more trees. maybe we can get some more coins.” she supplies, in what is a helpful tone, trying to disguise her need for amusement with a considerate grace.

“i think it looks easier than i thought”, hyuk found himself saying, slowly his suspicious aura fading, giving place to a more comfortable and trustworthy person; he could admit it was hard for him to open up immediately to people, especially when he was playing an important role, as a trainee contracted to work for an important brand. “i guess it helps when the joystick fits this good in my hands, don’t you agree?”

he didn’t really remember the last time he played games in a videogame, his parents ensured he could have everything he wanted, but he never thought about that, not when they all looked so expensive. so hyuk played the part of pretending he knew what he was doing and absorbed what people around him did, so he could still be a part of the cool kids gang.

“a stone for an axe? axes look important, maybe we should try to find it then.” he replied, scavenging his pockets, emptying them to show it to lili’s character. “this is what i have, do you think it’s enough for a net or should i shake more trees?”

HOW TO SAY I'M FUCKED IN JAPANESE? where lili probably shouldn't be in this workshop and yet, here she is — @lgcichika

she shouldn’t complain, really.

wasn’t this what she meant by she was interested in hosting — looking back, lili hadn’t really thought they would have taken such a small mention so seriously. at least, this is what she tells herself as she sits across from ichika and tries to find rational in why she was lumped into a workshop for a language she didn’t know a lick about.

still, she was no quitter, even if said workshop expected her to speak a whole-ass dialogue and such for some mock hosting gig as the evaluation. no, even then, lili was no quitter.

but — she did think they could have cut her some slack. just from the basic phrases and such that ichika had gone over in passing earlier with the rest of the group, lili was still having trouble wrapping her head around it all and this is after going over her notes thrice in the last half-hour. “i know, i suck — but i swear, i really didn’t know any japanese going into this so i think … really, i’m quite the improvement, wouldn't you agree?"

lili had never thought her social battery was one with a limit — but today, it seemed to exist in bursts. teetering on its last legs as she lets zoe’s drawl come in one ear with a nod and a small, passing smile when it goes out the other. it wasn’t that she was tired or anything but there was only so much energy could exert and unfortunately, much of it had been placed on emphasis when for the first time in the last four hours she had finally tried to try her luck in selling these goddamn soap bars that just were not their consumer’s target product today.

soap — she thinks, while sipping on the cup of juice she had snatched up from emi earlier — why had it been soap?

“mm,” she says in reply, setting her cup beside her on the bench. biting her tongue when zoe mentions luck — and sure, maybe the others did have luck on their side. even if the unspoken advantage was a tell-tale sign of it all. 

“grace, huh?”

losing with grace had never been her style but lili liked that that was how it seemed despite everything. 

“i wouldn’t be hyping up the food too much, if it’s anything like yesterday, the food will probably not be to the best expectations.” again, lili was not looking forward to being dressed to her elbows in misplaced vegetable chunks that did not make it onto the cutting board. her heel kicks gently at the ground with a small wry laugh, “you’d think because it’s our last day they’d treat us to a nice meal, i could really go for some ginseng chicken soup.” 

she didn’t want to complain — scratch that, this was lili — all she did was complain. 

♥︎ ╱ ꜱᴜɴᴅᴀʏ - ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴀɴᴛꜱ ᴊᴜɪᴄᴇ? ⤿ ꜰᴛ. @lgclili

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀♥︎

Zoe leaned back against the weathered wooden bench, relishing a moment of calm amid the bustling marketplace. The frenetic energy of the morning's sales still echoed in her mind, but now, with a satisfied smile, she turned her attention to Lili. She had seen her around Legacy before, so Zoe was grateful to get a chance to talk with her really.

"Can you believe how quickly today flew by? Team Juice really nailed it!" Zoe exclaimed, a glimmer of triumph in her eyes. She felt a swell of pride for their team's success, knowing they had earned a well-deserved break while the other teams took over the cooking duties.

Glancing at Lili, Zoe acknowledged her friend's efforts. "I guess luck was just on our side today," she remarked, reaching for her water bottle to quench her thirst. "But hey, don't stress too much about it. You did fantastic out there, and now we get to enjoy a scrumptious meal thanks to Team Soap Bar!"

Zoe's curiosity got the better of her as they continued chatting over their lunch. "By the way, how was your challenge with selling soap bars?" she asked, genuinely interested in Lili's experience. "I know it was a tough crowd out there, but you always handle it with grace."

BLACK WIDOW. lili makes a passing observation, unfortunately it's about jieun ; black banquet filming site — @lgcjieun

lili wasn’t a superstitious person — because coincidences could very well be just that — coincidences. and maybe it was just lili overthinking — or maybe, just maybe, it was the devil working her magic.

or worse yet — maybe it was jieun being in absolute close proximity that was driving lili up the wall.

( read: yes, it was 100%, absolutely, quadruply that )

like now for instance:

from a distance, lili had been fine. mingling with the other extras hadn’t been hard — they were friendly enough, seojin was here somewhere and then he wasn’t ( but this wasn’t about him ) — she was minding her own damn business, still sipping on the coffee she had gotten from hyunsoo’s coffee truck when from the corner of her eye she spots jieun’s manager running about like their head had been cut off.

enough that the sight had been picked up by not just she, but the others around her. each one, of note, murmuring their amusement while lili — while amused — couldn’t help but feel that aftertaste of envy under her iced americano. ugh, how unsightly. 

they weren’t too far from where jieun — a near shoulder or two apart, really — not that it mattered, as lili recounts her mere observation to any willing ear. 

“god, that poor manager, one paycheck away from being her slave.” she says to bumbling fools and nodding heads, a scattered agreement that turns to silence when the manager in question comes to a stop in front of them with jieun’s coffee and the realization of who they were gossiping about had been beside them all along. the quieted gasps turn to quickened steps as they make their escape, leaving jieun and lili to more than just rubbing shoulders and iced coffees.

“oh, jieun. didn’t see you there, seems like your manager was able to find you right away though. thank god, he was looking for you everywhere.” poor him, lili thinks.

XU LILI '01 / B. BEIJING, RAISED IN LA .

hellooooooo ~ this is nini again with a second character who's definitely a whole 180 approach from jino lol. took me a while to get an intro up because end of the year things kept me busy ! and i was also still trying to figure out how best to explain little miss lili here ~ but nevertheless, we're here now and down below you can get a good idea of this gal who is both bite and bark and will very much prove it !!! but i promise she can be nice even if it comes off haughty and self-serving so please like if you'd like to plot ♡

TL;DR signed jul. 2020, female senior morning group, female dorm a; self-serving, self-absorbed and overly self-concious? yet deep, deep, deep down she has a heart of gold? just got to dig deep enough underneath all her generational trauma lol

BACKGROUND

born li yifei, her name was legally changed to xu yifei when she got adopted by her grandmother / it was further changed when she gained dual citizenship through her grandmother when she moved her to los angeles -> now she goes by xu lili

her parents were a love that burned hot but burned out fast kind of relationship

also didn't help that her dad and mom were from starkly different social brackets that when her grandmother strongly opposed the marriage, her mother got disowned and left to be with her husband

but when the marriage ultimately fell apart, in a last ditch effort, they had lili

for a while it worked until the pains of motherhood, marriage and poverty got too much and when she turned 5, her parents divorced: her mother got her and her father got his freedom back — apparently that meant never seeing lili again, too

a year after her divorce, her mother met a new man (richer, older) and started a new family alongside that man’s children from a prev. marriage. by the time she was 7, lili was brought back to her grandmother’s and like her father, that would be the last she’d see of her mother

being adopted by her grandmother was a start to a new life, adapting to a new environment and learning that love wasn’t just given: it was earned

her grandmother was the owner of a real estate investment / development group; a woman of high expectations and most of all, showed love like how she did business: she expected results in return for her nurture

in the case of lili: her grandmother enrolled her into all the best programs, nurtured her love for performing, and expected the excellence that proceeded from the investment

but excellence can only go so far with natural talent, lili had the talent but in comparison to her peers, she didn’t have the it needed to take her far, something she learns when she receives no offers to continue her ballet career

( 2017 ) instead, she looks elsewhere to continue her love, to find adoration elsewhere is null when her grandmother is pressuring her for results: she auditions for a company in la and passes; suddenly she’s on a flight to korea and training to debut in a girl group of some unknown company

just when she was about to debut, her grandmother ends up sick and she went home when she was supposed to be practicing/preparing for debut

( 2020 ) she ends up getting dropped from the debut lineup upon return (and still has the audacity to be sad about it) ~

she joins lgc in jul. 2020 after getting dropped from debut and consequently the label

TIDBITS

much prefers to be called lili

was quiet and withdrawn as a kid because of her parental troubles, only was able to really fully express herself through performing

because of that she was able to come out of her shell, however, it was falsified by the desperate need of validation and her inherent ego that waged a war with her insecurities 

has imposter syndrome, so she on the low sabotages herself

such as when she was supposed to debut, she knew what was at stake but still left -> her grandmother didn’t even appreciate her visiting when she was sick, instead she was told to go back to korea and finish what she started

headstrong and stubborn, her grandmother had brought her up to say what was on her mind and not care about others -> it only made her selfish and self-serving

a bit of a tsundere, if you squint but i swear it’s there, she’s not used to people being overly affectionate to her and is very rarely affectionate; will be the one to give an awkward shoulder pat when comforting

honestly because of her parents she doesn't believe in love, thinks it's superficial, thinks lust is also dumb but what can a girl do when she has needs 💅 might also think she's hard to love / doesn't deserve it because of her trauma from her parents and her grandmother

is 100% right, always, even when she is 100% wrong — will argue why she’s right

she likes being as she says ~ playful ~ and riling people up and causing friction, call it what you will but i think it’s the attention-seeker in her thinking that even if she can’t get people to like her, if they’re irritated, that means they have to be thinking about her still? right ???

ambitious to a fault, she will do what she needs to do to get where she wants to, even if that means burning some bridges

her grandmother had taught her to learn to control her emotions, but what can we say, she’s an open book and if she’s not on a default rbf — she’s giving face

v relationship phobe - more or less will keep one at arms’ length; the type to make you think you’re close but you don’t really know much about her 

will get out of everything and anything but saying she doesn’t speak korean / can’t understand what you’re saying

does not like pity, will not stand to be pitied

smokes like a chimney, we know its bad !!! but girl is stressed !!! and when she’s stressed !! she smokes !!

vain, superficial and far too outgoing and confrontational for her own good (can’t be me lmfao) and will 100% tell you what’s on her mind without prompt

she is an enabler, she will enable you 100% to make bad choices

she only cares about her grandmother really because it’s her validation she seeks the most but lbr she seeks validation everywhere in everyone and that’s kind of her ruin because she also has foot in her mouth syndrome and a temper 😵‍💫

PLOT HOLES

⤷  honestly give me everything ! we want drama, friction ! friends who try to dip deep, friends who make her angry ! friends who are obviously surface friends but want to be more ! friends who care but are annoyed with lili's aloof attitude ! friends who are no longer friends ! rivals !!!!! i'll take everything and anything anyone comes up with

NOTE

⤷   also i should have her profile with a proper bio finished soon ~ sorry about that xx

fun was not the word that could explain her mood but she supposes it was the best way to … levy the anguish that was swirling inside her. if she had expected anyone to stop her, such a feat goes without notice, their presence easily slipping through the doors like sand between ones fingers; quick, hard to hold onto and without fail, easy to miss. 

lili knew she would hear no end of it later but she didn’t care about that, at least not now.

for the remainder of her birthday, lili wanted it to be about her.

and rather than wallow at home, moping about another failed birthday, she mulls jisoo’s suggestion with a tilt of her head; bracing the new year’s cold with a quick tug of her jacket around her shoulders. “what do you have in mind?” the night was still young but — it was the beginning of the new year, what were the odds somewhere had room to accommodate them?

it really didn't feel like a birthday dinner at all, and it makes jisoo think that they ought to rewind a few days and have had a mutual celebration instead. it's not too late, considering how its going. belated never hurt anyone ( well, on paper. but with lili, it could always play out to be a different story ) but anything seems to be better than this. the whole event was decorated as a farce for lili's birthday but the charade did not match. the memo was missed. and no birthday cake even!

jisoo is dressed for the occasion but the celebratory part seems to be amiss as he sat for majority of the eve, legs crossed and observant at the lack of anything truly happening. trying to stay quiet through the droll of speeches, there was only so many bathroom and water breaks he could take while not ditching his friend's side.

"yes, time does fly when you're.... having fun." he clears his throat, glancing at his watch. "i think it is time to head out. if you'll excuse us," his family did have a dog, settling perfectly at home with his parents, but it would be well-suited as an excuse if anyone asked for proof of photos. he hadn't brought anything with him that wasn't already on his body, lest his coat so with that in hand, he is already on tailspin on the way out. he prefers to have lili go ahead of him, in case anyone starts asking about why they were leaving so early, or that they not ought to go.

only when they're out of earshot, and sight and having turned the corner, jisoo glances at lili fully first before opening his mouth again. a conversation with her at times could be described as standing in the middle of a fork. which way to go? "would you rather head home or be on autopilot and we still end up celebrating your birthday a little more quietly between the two of us? we're already out and dressed for it."

FLY WITH ME. wanna fly with you in my arms ; hangang citizen’s park, seoul — @lgcminkyu

lili hadn’t thought much about the date lottery when the option had been placed on the table. it had been more or less a throw-away decision, sign her up there, hear about it later — sort of thing. 

however, when news came of her actually participating — and worse, having to be the one to plan the whole date — lili had her reservations. 

she had never been one to care about such things but what if her date sucked? and what if her date hated what she planned — what if netizens thought it was boring? ugh, this was the type of stress that imprinted permanent wrinkles to the forehead.

said wrinkles are ironed out as she eases herself into a sense of zen ; rolling her mystery date’s hint between her fingertips —  an adorable kuromi plushie that makes her wish she had chosen a my melody counterpart rather than the jellycat snake she had been eyeing for ages — as she waits at the corner of the entrance of hangang citizen’s park. all the cherry blossoms had finally departed from their blooms and all was left were their fallen petals, skirting around her heels.

she tries hard to keep her face from falling into a look of anxiousness as she pretends the camera currently zooming into her face from several steps away isn’t there, nor is the producer whispering into his headset isn’t inducing an annoying buzz in her ears. from afar, she can already spy the dozen or so kites taking flight ; vibrant colors painting the afternoon sky in their illustrious rainbow. "i hope they like it," she whispers to herself, taking another breath to calm herself.

all lili can do in return is nod. hand dropping once the other takes the tissue to wipe her face — and under lili’ scrutinizing gaze ( one that lili tries her best to disguise as concern when it really was just her busybody nosiness rearing its ugly head ) — lili wonders what had gotten the other so worked up. had sarang also been stressed over the setlist? or had she suddenly been delivered a bout of bad news?

she wasn’t pregnant was she?

lili does a once-over before shaking her head. no — that couldn’t be true. but did she have a right to intervene? she hardly knew the other — and lili wouldn’t call herself a saint. 

her eyes go wide when sarang begins to bumble — words stuttering out that lili feels herself freeze. lili was in no way a comforting person. sure, a hand on the shoulder — as she dead-scrolled on tiktok — an open ear and nodding grace — as her eyes glassed over and picked on key words — these were lili’s form of companionship when cornered with someone who needed a sprinkle of comfort and concern.

but words of ease? words of encouragement — lili feels her jaw slacken. “are you okay? it’s okay to breathe — i’m sure they’re not starting right this second.” shit, maybe not the right thing to say to someone who looked like they were about to drop dead from their self-inflicted hyperventilation. “okay, why don’t we slow down — uh … have you tried breathing exercises before?” 

“you know — like one, in — two …. out …” lili says, in her most gentlest tone — instructing in the same way she would her grandma’s dog. “why don’t we try that again? please don’t pass out on me, i don’t know first aid.” 

she hadn't noticed that there was another person in the bathroom. she was too busy going over every single thing she managed to get wrong during practice. not even mistakes only she noticed but enough to get constantly called out. her thoughts were spiraling fast. as if they hadn't been already.

then came the little prick of tears. what if this lead to a bad review? what if it lead to her being kicked out? the more she thought, the more she tossed water on her face to cover that up as well. but she couldn't bring herself to calm down. so it didn't help when she heard a voice and she had to kept herself from screaming.

sarang's face paused in horror for a moment. more so of the fact that someone caught her in the middle of a break down. it took more than a few seconds needed to process what was being said to her and held out to her. it took a few more seconds to take it with a slightly shaky hand and bow of head. "y-yeah." she not only mumbled but stumbled over the word.

"l-lili right?" she muttered back, trying to force herself to take breaths as she rubbed at her eyes. did the other notice she was crying? it only made her rub her eyes harder in an attempt to hide. her face dropped at the news. she needed more time. "u-uh..." breathe. "i-i'll be back in a sec-cond. um, could you.." she didn't want to bring anyone into her mess either. "i-...i- i'll be b-back...soon, i just need a s-second." now she was making a fool of herself but that didn't matter when she couldn't slow her heartbeat.