It Absolutely Breaks My Heart How, Whenever A Woman Says 

it absolutely breaks my heart how, whenever a woman says 

“it’s ok for women to express their attraction to other women” 

people are so quick to say 

“well, actually it is possible for women to objectify other women!”

is it possible for women to objectify other women? 

possibly, but i don’t see why that’s something lesbians and bi women need to constantly be reminded of. 

i dare you to find a lesbian or bi woman who, because of internalized homophobia, has never once felt shame about their feelings towards women. 

instead of constantly reminded these women, “be careful! don’t objectify women!” 

we should be working to uplift these women and celebrate sapphic attraction as something that’s natural and beautiful 

(because it is natural and beautiful!).

several months ago i started crying over my lunch because i felt guilty about thinking about gillian anderson’s boobs, 

and had to lie to my mom and tell her i was upset because i was “just stressed about school.” 

i was so upset because i felt like i was objectifying gillian, and i felt like my sexuality and my endeavors to be a good feminist were in conflict.

i am constantly afraid of crossing a line when talking or even just thinking about my sexual attraction towards other women. 

even when my lovely and supportive friends show me a picture of a celebrity and say 

“wow, don’t you think she’s beautiful?” 

i usually feel uncomfortable with saying anything more than 

“yeah, she’s pretty,” 

because i don’t want them to think im being creepy or offensive.

everyone’s struggle with their sexuality is, of course, different, 

but before you accuse lesbians and bi women of objectifying women, 

please step back and consider how harmful such an accusation can be for young women coming to terms with their sexuality.

also, if you’re a straight woman and if you feel like a lesbian or bi woman hitting on you or complimenting you is “objectifying” 

please consider, is this woman actually being offensive, or is internalized homophobia making you uncomfortable with the interaction? 

accusations of objectification should not be a gut reaction to a woman expressing attraction for other women. 

what we should be talking about is how objectification affects gay women. 

the stereotype of bi women as promiscuous, the prevalence of lesbian porn catered to men. 

women’s attraction for other women can never be equated to men’s attraction for women 

because lesbians and bi women are just as much victims of male objectification as are straight women.

tl;dr: sapphic women should not be ashamed of feeling sexual attraction for other women; those feelings are natural and beautiful and should be celebrated