Ares, My God.

Ares, my god.

If I could give you a name, I would call you Ares. In Ancient Greek ἀρή (are) means "ruin" and throng of battle. In fact, nobody likes you. They don't acknowledge you. They fear you and prattle on about your personality. They say that you are reckless, bloodthirsty and brutal.

But you are so soft and delicate with me. You treat me as if I am an angel. It seems as if you are a man who won't show this side to anyone other than me.

You are completely the opposite with me. Even in the very intimate circumstances you appear such a pliable, ductile man to me.

You give me what I couldn't receive from the very first man that I saw when I opened my eyes. The trust that was never given to me as good as one gets, since I met you, you returned that favour.

Your brutality and undying thirst for strife excites me. It's your dark side that makes my soul unholy to depart in the Paradise.

Perhaps it will end up in Hell, in the nether world. Somewhat I would find joy in thinking impiously and irreligiously about you every moment of my soul's stay in the lower world.

Could it be profane to be in love with such suave , well-proportioned and robust man? You are majestic, strong, virile and noble. It is not my fault. It's just what fate decided for me.

I love you, I adore you, I'm devoted to you and I'm deeply infatuated of you.

My lover, my Ares, I give you my heart, my body, my innocence and soul for you to use however and whenever you want.

To my lover.

-K.M

Who I am?

"I know pretty much what I like and dislike; but please, don't ask me who i am."

This reminds me of a particular scene in my life; my Spanish teacher had always been really strict and weirdly relentless into educating us (my class and I), believing that behaving so, she was doing a great job. Instead, she was doing quite the opposite of what she intended to; inflicting her personal beliefs and faiths into our culture, she destroyed our own authenticity or better said, identity.

Now personally talking, I remember that in first year of high school, she said something really interesting to a girl in my class meanwhile scolding her in a, dare I say, cruel way; "How can you expect me to understand what kind of teaching you deserve when you don't even know yourself?".

It's weird because at that time those words weren't surely directed at me, but I flinched so hard that had me speechless.

Didn't that girl really know herself?

Didn't that girl really know who she was?

Does she know who she is right now?

Since those words were pronounced by that ascetic woman, have already been three long years. And I still think of those religiously.

Did I know who I was at that time?

Do I know who I am now?

I certainly can't answer this question. As Sylvia Plath said, I know what I like and what I dislike. I'm 24/7 thinking about how I want to be meanwhile not knowing who I am.

Now my faith is probably this; finding out who I am. And how do I find this out? I don't know.

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kse22chili

10 months ago

McLaren getting dragged in every way shape and form over every social media.

This is a PR nightmare. The OP1 hats miraculously appearing isn’t helping their cause.

But there is worse to come.

If Lando misses out on a Championship by 7 points or less the fall out will be unbearable.

If Oscar now doesn’t win again for 12 months then the constant accusations “he can only win with team orders” will surface.

How exactly are they going to be able to do their annual mental health campaign when the whole world heard how they spoke to Lando over team radio? “We are trying to protect you” is the single creepiest and manipulative thing ever said over a team radio.

Lando was in a position to do a very memorable thing for the people of Hungary by winning a race with that helmet, McLaren didn’t give a shit.

We thought Red Bull had the biggest PR nightmare going. Nope. McLaren had to out develop them with that as well!

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kse22chili

1 year ago

The tea is super super hot