Glass Pendant In The Shape Of A Ram's Head, Carthage, 5th-4th Century BC

This is a hilarious concept

Silly idea for a novel: the maintenance guys for ancient temple traps.

They’re a team of travelling engineers and quality assurance experts, who have to stay a step ahead of the assorted adventurers and archaeologists. The job is to make all the puzzles and traps authentic to original design, difficult to solve (but not too difficult. They want a staggered fatality rate so the final traps and puzzles get a chance to shine as well), and to stay ahead of schedule.

They’re all members of the reportedly long lost people who built the ruins. How or why this might be is never addressed. They carry themselves like regular tradesmen, all ‘well there’s you’re problem’ while dangling on a harness over a spike trap to fix the giant swinging axe. They have a water traps guy but he’s sick so the mechanical engineer is filling in. The spring loaded traps are all sticking this year due to humidity. The spinning clockwork puzzles are waiting for a part. The guy who replaces the tiles on collapsing floor traps thinks that’s bullshit. The stone worker who fixes the facades after the repairs has a UST-drenched rivalry with the botanist who arranges the moss and vines over hidden entrances and faded murals. The poison darts guy and the snake handler are siblings trying to fill their dad’s shoes. The final assessor is the grizzled old expert who’s seen it all and everyone respects. He has final say on whether or not the work is up to scratch and they can move onto the next temple. He gets injured/falls into a bottomless pit at the end of act one and they have to do the big job without him. The pressure is on to do him proud.

The archaeologists/adventurers have no clue about any of this. They’re constantly traipsing through the jungles, trying to decode clues, and loudly dying in the background. This is treated like a standard inconvenience.

Occasionally they run into vengeful spirits or surviving priests, who treat them the same way you treat a plumber who is fixing your sink: and tentatively offer them a sandwich and a cup of tea and try not to complain about them wearing work boots in the house.

reblog this post ONLY if you're older than it, people born after july 27 2024 DNI

I am becoming aware of the effect a lack of trust in the media has had on people, paired with a dearth of research skills.

A piece of writing advice I've always fucking hated is "only add things that further the plot." Because no. Add stuff for fun. Give your mom a cameo. Have these characters be in love because. And yes, have characters die because. There doesn't have to be a reason for everything. The universe doesn't give a reason for everything. Why should you? And if you never add stuff for fun, you're never going to have fun.

dashboard advent wreath for y’all :) (x)

Yay!!! Desi Miku!!!

Rock crystal lizard uncovered near Cortil-Noirmont, Belgium, 2nd century AD

from The Art and History Museum, Brussels

Venezuelan Miku!!