I Have Read So Many Fanfics Here And On Many Other Platforms. Most Of The Fics Are Romantic And Revolve

granite glow | jk

↳ words 7k

↳ genre slice of life, videographer jungkook au, marriage au, angst, fluff

How far are you willing to go, for the ones you love?

How far is ‘too far’? 

Constraints.

“Come on, sweetie!” he hopes around, jogging in place, pestering you while you shut your eyes in an attempt to divert your focal point and find an inner peace that Jungkook chases away. “Shush, I’m trying to meditate,” you darted, sitting cross-legged on the wooden bench since you both came. “Do you know that toxins are expelled faster through sweats than through excretion?” he began and you gave him death glares. 

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Happy Birthday to the raven-haired, doe-eyed boy, whose a little bit of smile lifts me up when I'm feeling down. Whose calming voice gives me peace when I'm so lost. Whose a message encourages me to always go forward and never give up. Whose just the whole existence makes me sane. Love that boy with all my heart. And appreciate him so much. Happy Birthday Jungkook and thank you for existing 💜💜💜💜

invisible string  ಌ   jjk  ╱  𝐈.

ಌ       summary: a decade wasn’t enough to rid you of the pesky, silly and not so little crush you harbored for jeon jungkook during your miserable teenage years. even now, when he’s a totally different person from the geek you used to know.

ಌ       back to the series masterlist.

𝐈.   it’s still not over for me.

ಌ       pairing: jjk x reader (f). ಌ       genre: childhood friends to lovers |  high school reunion au  |  angst + fluff. ಌ       rating: pg-16. ಌ       word count: 2,6k. ಌ       content warning(s): swearing/heavy language (a lot!!), angst & co., mentions of unrequited love, brief mentions of bullying, themes of jealousy, passive aggressive text messages, slight depictions of a cold/fever, just a whole lot of miscommunication as a plot & that’s all for now!

ಌ       author’s note: it’s here! and it’s much shorter than i anticipated for a first chapter, but within good reason: it’s very plot heavy and i wanted to save up the next few scenes for the second chapter. plus, nothing like building a little mystery, eh? ;) i want to thank you all for being so so patient, so loving & so warm towards me. bonus mentions to @lavienjin​ for their endless support & @gothbabejk​ for hyping me up! i love you guys. (and again, i’m very sorry for the short first chapter). enjoy!

ಌ       taglist: @fangirl125reader​ @helenazbmrskai​ @babyrosieareroses​ @blue-jade @vantezza @diorejeon​​ @akshstudios​ @queenmasterxx @ggukkieland @daggersandicedcoffee @kookxin @illegurlbangtan​ @supernoonanyc @pinkbubblegumuniverse @bloopkook @bbangtanlove95 @kirbykook  @haeilove @moonchild1 @bbtsficrecs @siadreams @namjeonii @crmyclit @suzysuee @jimilter @girlontheblock @ruruvia @heyitsjesc @stinkyeren @nayaty @taehyungseggs​ @bonobonoyaaaahh​ @hautae​ @shreyuuu​ @captainsjoongs​ @nochuel​ @namkook713 ​ @mageprincess7​ @itsbuffsanta​ @koorosie​ @claricedelune​ @fan-ati–c​

– summer of 2009. –

The foundations of your heart are as rocky as the tiles of the rooftop which holds the weight of your bodies leaning against one another. The midnight breeze hasn’t been gentle in these first few days of summer’s end, not in the way you expected it to.

Hours of sleeplessness began to catch onto you, clinging onto Jungkook’s body for more support. He’s as solid as a stone, holding his gaze to the purple dawn sky awaiting the sunrise. You can’t remember which one of you had the stupid idea to climb onto the roof to watch the first hours of the morning, but it’s not as weird as you thought it’d be.

It’s tempting to close your eyes right as the sun threatens to cross the horizon, reminding you of the last few days of summer, your last high school year and your only one best friend.

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This is really fun to read. I am also imagining Jin with his flustered face reading all those tweets 😅😂

reading thirst tweets | ksj

plot | You and Jin read thirst tweets to each other.

words | 1739

genres | humor/crack, barely fluff, actors!au

pairing | actor!jin x famous!reader

warning | language, suggestive theme

disclaimer | usernames used in the fic are all fictional.

note | a random thought while on my midterm break. have fun reading, loves.

main masterlist | drabble series

“Hi! I’m Jin.” you began, raising a hand.

And Jin, who sat next to you, raised his hand too, “And I’m Y/N. We’re here at Buzzfeed…”

“...to read some thirst tweets.” you raised your eyebrows up and down while squinting at the camera.

“With a twist!” Jin exclaimed.

“What’s the twist?” you asked turning to the producers, who were off-screen.

You and Jin have nothing to promote for this event. Jin was just announced to be cast in a limited series days ago while you just finished a press junket for your latest movie a month ago. But out of big demand, you two were invited to do this segment. Hailey lets you decide on your own since you’re doing it with Jin anyway. 

Normally, as your manager, she would scan through everything you will do for the press like interviews. She would advise you on what to do and don’t. But since this one is with Jin and you two already did a lot of clutter together, Hailey just gave up and made you choose to go or not. Of course, you accepted the invitation. 

You and Jin sat there side by side, listening to their instructions. “You two will read thirst tweets for one another and say it while looking directly at each others’ eyes.”

“So, it’s like a chemistry test…” you mumbled.

Jin nodded and winked at the camera while pointing finger guns, “But steamier…”

“Also, the one who has the less reaction at the end of the video wins.” the producer added.

Before the reading began, you two were asked to turn your chairs and sit in front of one another. There is a safe two feet of distance between you. There is also a wooden stool on the side, where the bucket of tweets sat. You see Jin smirking as you two sat on your seats. He seemed pretty confident with this and you feel excited. You don’t really read anything about yourself on Twitter since it can be terrifying. So, hopefully, this will be fun. It’s just thirst tweets. You’ve seen videos of your other colleagues doing it and it’s embarrassing and funny at the same time.

“Okay, who’s going first?” you asked.

Jin handed you the bucket, “Ladies first.”

“Oh, thank you, Jinnie.” you chuckled.

As soon as you ran your eyes to the small piece of paper, you had to stop yourself from laughing. Jin crossed his arms over his chest, internally excited based on your reactions.

“Thank God Jin isn’t a real vampire because what if I start moaning while he’s sucking the life out of me?!”

Instead of being flushed, Jin laughed hard. His wide shoulders shook. He heard theories about him being a vampire. Simply because, they said, he doesn’t seem to get older after years of being in the spotlight. People on the internet always compare his pictures from a decade ago to his recent ones.

“Who said Jin isn’t a real vampire?” you turned to the camera. “I thought I already proved that he is one of them. I have the video, right? Plus, this is an old man right here. I swear, he is three thousand and ninety-two years old.”

Jin shook his head, “No, what happened in that video was an attack. And again, I’m just three years older than you. Quit calling me old man.”

“Still old.” you scoffed, rolling your eyes.

The video that you two were referencing was the one you posted around last year’s Halloween. In the clip, you, who’s recording, were running after Jin while throwing cloves of garlic in his direction. You screamed behind him, “I know that you’re a vampire! Admit it!”. It was a chaotic scenario that you captioned: pov you’re trying to kill some vampire in your backyard.

“Whatever. Okay, I’m next.” Jin reached for a tweet. He didn’t give off any reaction when he read it to himself at first. Then, he turned to you before reciting the tweet with more emotions, “Y/N is a goddess, a queen, and a legend. She’s the fucking icon that this world needs. She is the most beautiful human ever. Goodbye.”

While he was saying those words, you mirrored Jin’s expressions exaggeratedly. It was obvious that you were just playing along as you stared at him with dazed eyes, even putting your hand on your chest. Like you have fallen in love.

When he was done repeating it, you gasped, “That’s not a thirst tweet! That’s too sweet and kind. Thank you so much to whoever tweeted that.”

You blew a kiss on the camera. You picked another tweet and your eyes instantly widened as you read it quietly. It made Jin wonder what was in there.

“Now, this is thirst!” you exclaimed. You turned to your leading man, “Oh, man. You’re going to lose at this… This is a message for Jin. If you're reading this, please know that I would love to have your hand as a necklace, sir. Hashtag choke me sir.”

Jin tried not to react. But he could feel the heat rising in his body out of embarrassment. He knows that you are aware of how easily he can be shy about things. Especially with this. He read worse in his posts’ comment section. But this type of aggressive review from people never fails to make his cheeks blush.

“Any thoughts on that, sir?” you stressed on the nickname, trying to stifle a laugh as you look at him.

He shook his head, “Just– No… I would prefer using my hand to give a high five to you all.”

He smiled at your giggle at his answer. He rolled up the sleeves of his sweater before fishing for another piece of paper. His eyes lightened up when he read it.

“Oh my god. Y/N could strangle me with that Versace gown and I would still say thank you.” he repeated.

“Honey, that’s murder,” you replied with concern. “I would not strangle anyone. That’s unnecessary. I don’t think I’m into strangling anyone.”

Jin held back a laugh as you said the last sentence like a slow realization. You raised an eyebrow at him, “Why are you laughing? Are you into choking anyone?”

Your question obviously had some suggestive theme. But you asked with an innocent expression. Jin can already feel the stress from both of your PR managers with this video.

“No. No, I am not.” Jin replied.

“That’s good to know. You got me a little worried there, buddy.” you winked and gave a pat on his shoulder before getting another tweet. “Imagine getting paid to kiss Kim Seokjin and his pretty lips, how does it feel to be in heaven?”

Jin was ready to reply, “Well–”

“Ah, based on my experience, as someone who had down thousand of movies with Mr. Kim Seokjin, heaven tasted like a tuna-mayo sandwich.” you cut him off with a matter-of-fact tone.

He gasped dramatically, “What? I don’t eat anything before any kissing scene. You’re the one who always eats the most disgusting meal before our kissing scenes.”

“Shhh! Stop with the lies, liar. It’s fine. I understand that you have a big heart for tuna-mayo sandwiches.” you shut him off.

“For the record, I am a very hygienic person.” 

The camera zoomed to Jin as he explained himself. Just like how the camera would point at Jim in The Office. There are just few papers left. 

“This was a reply on one of your tweets. Ready?” he began as he reads the tweet quietly with his eyes.

“Sure.”

“Why? Why would anyone tweet this?!” he suddenly complained, sounding embarrassed and annoyed at the same time. “Do people really call you this?”

You laughed even though you don’t know what he was talking about, “I won’t know if you won’t read it!  Just go, Jinnie.”

After letting out a big sigh, he cleared his throat before reading, “Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Oh, excuse me! Mommy? Sorry.”

Jin’s ears were already red as tomatoes when he finished saying that. He never called anyone mommy even his mom, who simply called as mom or ma. He never planned on calling anyone it, especially you. 

“Ah, yes, my lovely children from Twitter.” you reacted so calmly like the term was already normal to you. “I’m so sorry, kids. I think only Francheskat can call me that.”

There was still a last piece of tweet in the small bucket. Jin was supposed to read it. But based on his head hanging low, an effort to hide his still-flustered face, you made a decision to just do it.

“Okay since Jin right here cannot read anymore, I’ll take this last one.” you winked at the camera while Jin turned his head up to wordlessly read it with you. “I want someone to look at me the way Y/N and Jin look at each other.”

After that, you and Jin slowly looked at each other. You were smiling like an idiot as you know that you already won in this game. While Jim playfully glared at you. It was a cute and childish interaction. Still, everyone in the room cannot deny the chemistry between the two actors. Everyone was in awe before you broke eye contact.

“Oh my god, Jin. Look at your ears!” you pointed out, giggling. “Someone give him a glass of water!”

The video reached a million views in less that eight hours. The comments were filled not just by your massive and active fans but also, the general audience.

MoonlightBaby  2 hours ago

This video made me look up for that vampire video

Kim SeokjinFan  7 hours ago

poor jinnie 🤣 i always love their chaotic energy

YNJIN1208  1 hour ago

OMG DID SHE CALLED HIM BABY?????

▼ 1 reply

Levi  5 minutes ago

I think she said buddy.

natalia r.  5 hours ago

not a fan here, can someone tell me these two are dating. I mean, they gotta be dating!!

▼2 replies

catladyfan 5 hours ago

no one knows 😭😭😭

cornelia street  3 hours ago

it will be a mystery forever

Penelope P.  8 hours ago 

I don’t think these two will agree on doing this without each other HAHAHA

Harry’sHouse  4 hours ago 

not y/n implying that jin have a choking kink 💀

being a fangirl  2 hours ago

y/n really enjoyed calling him sir for a whole minute there...

taglist rules

THE A-LISTERS TAGLIST

@seolaquotes @fatimaaaaa129 @bangtannieshope @jub-jub @yoontaethings @kissme-ornot @sleepy-daydreams @veronawrites @cuteipat @ratherbefangirling @babystarcandy-gcf @akirawhore @alpacaparkaseok @rjsmochii @prlan @lovesickbangtan @zealouslightcookiebasketball @rapmonie2047 @btsiguess-kpop @angelarin @walkinganxiety0 @tpwk-280 @mediumcatt @bloopkook

PERMANENT TAGLIST

@dunixxd @cixrosie​ @moonchild1 ​ @jksjx​ @embrace-themagic ​ @buttvi​  @starbtslove​  @missseoulite @vanntaesworld @barbiekatz

so close to perfect | jjk

jeon jungkook x reader

angst with a happy ending, idol!au, established relationship ; wc : 1480 words

rating: pg13

warnings: swearing, mentions of insecurities, jungkook is a bit of a dick here i'm sorry lol

note: this fic was inspired by this song! it's been collecting dust in my drafts for so long and then i realized that i haven't posted anything in months so....... hope you guys enjoy!

jeongguk has always been your constant, and even with what seems to be the whole world against the two of you, you can't bring yourself to let him go.

Sighing, you take a sip from your tea. “You’re a fucking idiot.”

Jeongguk blinks. “What?”

“I said,” you repeat slowly, “you’re a fucking idiot. I know what I got into. You don’t get to make decisions for me.”

“I’m not making decisions for you, (Y/N).” He scoffs, leaning back on his chair. “I’m telling you that this isn’t working out between us. We need to break up.”

For a few moments, you say nothing. The sounds of the cafe downstairs fill the silence between the two of you and you idly wonder if he’ll gain some sense the longer that you stare at him. You raise an eyebrow.

“You literally told me that you wanted to start a family with me yesterday,” you deadpan. “People don’t change that quickly, especially not you.”

“Then you obviously don’t know me well enough!” He fires back, leaning forward as he grips the edge of your table. His jaw clenches, and in another time, maybe you would have found it attractive. Now, however, it only fuels your irritation further.

Pinching the bridge of your nose, you consider actually slapping some sense into that stupid, big head of his. “Jeongguk, I’ve known you for ten years,” you remind him calmly. “I know you better than I know myself, which is why I know that you’re an awful liar and that every sentence you’ve uttered in the past ten minutes has been pulled straight out of your ass.”

You can practically see the gears turning in his head. It was clear that this strategy wasn’t working out, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out that it was time for him to switch tactics.

When his gaze grows harder, colder, you already know that the next thing that comes out of his mouth will tear your heart to shreds. Still, you tilt your chin upwards, meeting his gaze head-on.

“(Y/F/N),” he says quietly, voice so dangerously low. You brace yourself for the impact. “How do I make you understand that the past three years have been nothing but a waste of my time?”

Bull’s-fucking-eye.

He takes your frozen state as a sign to continue. “The past three years have just been one big trainwreck. You’ve done nothing but hold me back in every aspect of my life. You have been nothing but selfish and it shows even now,” he scoffs. “You refuse to listen to me when I tell you something. It’s always your way or the highway, isn’t it?”

You’re stunned into silence. So this was the path he was going to take, huh? Somewhere, underneath the wave of hurt that washes over you is a thought: textbook. This is a textbook manifestation of your worst fears, your deepest insecurities. He knows you better than you know yourself; knowing exactly which buttons to press to hurt you the most. He’s cutting into your very soul with surgeon-like precision. The wounded, angry part of you wants to take the bait, to rip him apart but you don’t have it in you to tear into him just as he had done with you.

So you say nothing, merely tilting your head to the side. Slowly, you bring your cup to your lips, sipping quietly before setting it down once more. His eyes are still dark, filled with barely repressed rage.

“You’re always fucking clinging to me too!” He spits out. “You act like you’re so high and mighty but then you act like a fucking child whenever you don’t get what you want. Grow the fuck up,” he laughs humorlessly. “Loving you is the biggest mistake of my life. I wish I never fucking met you.”

At that statement, you can’t even hold back a wince. If you weren’t watching him so closely, you would not have noticed the way his eyes widen infinitesimally, fingers twitching as if he wanted to reach out for you. He bites his lip and for a second he looks like the Jeongguk that you know and love. That’s all it takes for you to strengthen your resolve once more, to force your tears back, and to face this head-on as if he hadn’t hit you where it hurt the most.

“Is that all you’ve got?” You say coolly as if your heart didn’t ache at his words. “Let it all out, love; I’ve got all day.”

His facade begins to crumble. “Why aren’t you mad at me?”

You raise an eyebrow. “Do you want me to be mad at you?”

He visibly deflates in front of you. Shaking his head, he looks at the coffee table, fingers tracing the scratches on the surface.

“Just break up with me,” he whispers pitifully. “It’s the best thing you can do.”

You hum softly. “Do you want to break up with me because of the reasons that you listed earlier? Or…”

“Or?”

“Does this have something to do with the conversation you had with your manager this morning?”

His head shoots up, eyes widening comically. “How do you know that?”

“I have my ways,” you shrug. “That, and the fact that Yoongi overheard the two of you and gave me a heads up.”

“How did he even overhear us?”

You only shrug once more. Yoongi was, well, Yoongi. He was a man of many (slightly concerning) talents.

“If you’re worried about me receiving hate,” you start, pulling his hand into your grasp, “then you have nothing to worry about. I’m a big girl. I can handle it.”

He scoffs quietly but there’s no real malice behind it. “People are cruel when they want to be. I’ve been on the receiving end of that, (Y/N). I never want you to know what that feels like.”

“So you were just going to take the easy way out?”

He blanches. “No, I… I just wanted to protect you…”

A sad grin creeps up your face. “And look where that got us.”

Letting go of his hand, you take another sip of your tea, almost spitting it out when you look at Jeongguk and realize he has actual tears in his eyes. “Guk?” You say worriedly, hand reaching out to cup his cheek. He leans into your touch and closes his eyes, eyebrows still adorably scrunched in that way it always did whenever he was close to tears.

When he opens his eyes again, you smile.

“I didn’t mean what I said,” he says hoarsely. “I don’t think you’re selfish or immature or clingy. Loving you, meeting you has been the best thing to happen to my life and⁠, and I⁠—” He swallows thickly, a single tear rolling down his cheek. You’re quick to wipe it off even as you feel your own eyes well up with tears.

“I love you,” he admits. “I look at you and my heart feels so full and you make me so happy and I just, I love you so much⁠—” he sobs, dragging his seat closer to you so he could hold you close. You stiffen when he buries his face in the crook of your neck, only relaxing when you’re sure that no one else is on this floor of the cafe. Your arms wrap around his hunched form, letting him cry freely.

“I’m so sorry about what I said. I didn’t mean any of it I swear,” he blubbers, nose all red and runny. It’s almost adorable how he looks at you so earnestly with tears in his eyes. “You’re my everything, (Y/N), I mean it.”

He pulls away from you with a sudden urgency, hands cupping your face gently as he looks into your eyes deeply. “You don’t hold me back. You make me a better person every single day. I’m an idiot who should have talked to you about this first before forcing you to break up with me.”

“You are an idiot,” you agree. He snorts at how quickly you agree, but all you can think of at the moment is how easily he puts your heart at ease despite being the very person to have ripped it apart moments earlier.

“Don’t get me wrong, we’re going to talk about this in detail but this isn’t a discussion we should be having in a public place.” You rise from your seat, patting his cheek gently. “Let’s go home?”

He nods happily, giving you that smile⁠—that soft smile of his that makes you forget about everything else, the one that tells you he loves you more than anything in the world. “Let’s go home.”

The two of you still had so many things to talk about, so many things to unpack from today’s events. It almost seems daunting now that you think about it as the two of you walk home with your hand in his, but as long as you had him… then maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Date in a Box

Words: 9.7k Genre: Fluff. So much fluff. 

Read more at Service Series

He called and you came running.

Knock Knock.

The door swings open; a boy dressed in a white shirt, blue jeans and timberlands greets you with frightened doe-eyes. “Are you-”

“Yes I am.” You push your way in, not having enough time to slip off your shoes politely. You take one quick scan of his apartment. “How much time do we have?”

“She’s coming in five minutes.” He says in alarm, scrambling to look at the clock.

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Though only one chapter has come, I'm already loving it. I'm eagerly looking forward to the series 😊. Proposal au is always been one of my favorites and I'm sure this series will be wonderful. Keep up with your good work dear author 💜❤

Favorite Jungkook Fic 🐰

This is the list for Series (some are ongoing) and Two shots

Series || Two shots

✩ Worst of You @oureuphoria | Angst, Fluff (Jungkook Police Officer au. Jungkook has commitment issue) <Complete>

✩ @ahundredtimesover

Inevitable | Angst, Fluff, Smut (Jungkook sports au. Dad Jungkook) <Complete>

Empty Space | Angst, Smut, Fluff (Two Shots. Police Officer Jungkook. Ex fwbs) <Complete>

✩ Re: Untitled @to-star-lake | Angst, Smut, Fluff (Husband Jungkook. Marriage au. It has a big twist and that is mind-blowing) <Complete>

✩ His Name @jimlingss | Angst (Jungkook has DID. OC is a psychologist. It is really sad 😭) <Complete>

✩ Take My Hands Now @manggojooz | Angst, Fluff (Jungkook College /Uni au. OC has a special power of feeling others' pain) <Complete>

✩ Angel's Trumpet @hansolmates | Fluff, Angst, Slight Smut (Jungkook idol au. Kind of fantasy au) <Complete>

✩ Stoic and Redemption @blue-jade | Angst, Smut (Two shots. Husband Jungkook. Infidelity au. Parents au in the second story) <Complete>

✩ @flowerwrites06

Utopic Desire | Angst, Smut (Jungkook vampire au) <Complete>

Bow to You | Angst, Smut yet (Royalty au. Infidelity au. King Jungkook Queen OC) <Ongoing>

✩ To Build A Home @soft4gguk | Fluff, Smut, Angst (Single dad Jungkook. Nanny OC) <Ongoing>

✩ Evolution of A Lover's Heart @jeonstudios | Angst, Fluff (Jungkook College /Uni au. Fuckboy Jungkook but he is a good person now after an incident. But he is hurt 😭) <Ongoing>

✩ An Ode to a Broken Heart @smoochkooks | Angst, Slight Smut yet (Drabble series. Unrequited love. Best friend au) <Ongoing>

✩ Burning Love @bangtanficsforyou | Angst yet (Only prologue has come. Jungkook is OC's ex) <Ongoing>

✩ Candy Cane Ache @monvante | Angst, Fluff yet (The Proposal au. Journalist Jungkook) <Ongoing>

—chapter ten: chasing pavements

this is a part of my an ode to a broken heart drabble series.

pairing: jeon jungkook/reader

genre: unrequited love, best friends to (?), heavy angst, smut

word count: 2k

summary: august slips away like a moment in time. slowly, day after another. a story of love that never meant to be. 

previous || next

a/n: sorry for the delay, my loves. i was going through some writer’s block lately and didn’t really have any energy to write but i’m over it now, so here’s a new chapter. prepare tissues :)

If you could use just two words to describe what is it like to be in love with Jeon Jungkook, you’d say it’s like chasing pavements. Fruitless activity, trying to achieve something destined to failure, a result of your blind hope, and perhaps foolishness.

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I’ll love you until you love yourself - Jungkook Drabble

Why am I so full of angst? Ex lovers au

It’s 12.45 am when the loud banging on the front door wakes you from your sleep. The blinking light of the digital clock letting you know exactly how late it is. You’re trying to make sense of the words being spoken at the door but it takes your brain a second to catch up, and you can barely keep your eyes open when you switch on the hallway lights. Should you have a weapon? You feel like you should have a weapon.

“Noona! Open up!” Yugeom? What the hell was Yugeom, your ex boyfriends best friend doing outside of your house at this hour? Trying to piss your neighbours off?

You snatch the handle on the door and open it with a pull.

“What the hell are you doing here?” You’re seething because of distrupted sleep, you liked Yugeom, no real hard feelings for the guy, but you’d kill him in the next two seconds if he didn’t have a really good explanation.

“It’s Jungkook,” he breathes heavily, you want to slam the door in his face at the name, but when you take in his busted lip and black eye, your heart sinks into the ground.

“What about Jungkook?” The name feels foreign coming from your mouth after so long, all your friends know it’s not a word to ever utter in your presence. They all tried to get it out of you, why it ended when it was working so well, all confused when they could see how much Jungkook loved you.

“He was absolutely devoted to you Y/n, why did he leave?” They were shocked by it, they thought you found the perfect guy, but you kept silent against their onslaught of questions. You did find the perfect guy, you were the one to end it.

Yugeom grabs your attention from going too far back into the past, “Noona he...”

He hesitates, not knowing if he’s doing the right thing for you both, Jungkook never told him how it ended, he just drank his sorrows away.

“He got in with the wrong crowd Noona, after you both broke up he just went into a spiral. We thought it was a phase so we just kept an eye on him but it’s really bad, and he’s not coming out of it.”

You suck in air between gritted teeth, feeling like hell had just opened it’s portal beneath you, waiting for it to drag you to the fire.

“Yugi, where is he?”

——————————————————————————

There’s no trace of sleep in you as you clutch the steering wheel at 100mph down the road, you’re eeriely calm and silent, Yugeom thinks, despite the haste at which you’re driving, the only trace of emotion he can see is how your jaw is clenched. Normally welcoming silence he finds this moment with you too unnerving not to fill, and against his better judgement he spills everything Jungkook’s been up to since you broke his heart.

The drugs, the smoking, the drinking; with each new revelation he could see your grip tighten impossibly on the steering wheel and your veins look like they were ready to pop. The car swerved when he mentioned the girls, and he decides then to fasten his seatbelt. He wants to ask what happened between you both, what you did to make his best friend lose it like this, but he holds his tongue, he knows from the look Jungkook gives him when he tries to ask that it’s best to never mention.

You don’t even try to park in the lines as the car comes to an abrupt stop at the pub Jungkook’s in. Yugeom scrambles in his seat to get out, he didn’t miss the way the car nearly went into the wall and he valued his life a little more than maybe you did.

You don’t feel like icy air hit your legs in the pyjama shorts you’re wearing, the adrenaline heating you up and making you jitter. You force yourself into the building and every description Yugeom detailed in the car couldn’t prepare you for the sight of your ex boyfriend beating a man to the ground, while his new friends cheered.

He doesn’t hear you walk up to them, too busy causing new bruises into the man’s face, what he did to deserve it you didn’t know or care, but you wanted him to stop.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” It comes out more coldly than you expect, but it stops him in his tracks, fist caught midair. He’s shocked, that’s an understatement, but he doesn’t care you’re there. He doesn’t care he feels something other than despair at the sound of your voice, that his heart is beating out of his chest faster than it had beating the shit out of the man under him.

It’s too silent for a second before you hear him scoff, how dare you come back. How dare you force him out of your life only to arbitrarily walk back in when you wanted. He doesn’t even look at you when he brushes himself off and walks to the bar. He leans against it as he sets the cigarette alight and takes in a deep corrupted breath. You’re there after a puff, taking it out of his mouth and putting it out on the bar, not giving a shit about the dirty look the bartender is giving you.

“You hate smoking.” It’s just a statement, but he does, he detests the habit so why your Jungkook held it in his mouth like a second set of lips baffles you. He still doesn’t look at you, jaw set on edge at how pissed he is at you.

“Why do you care?” It’s a loaded question, said with hate but you can hear the vulnerability behind it, a glimpse of your Jungkook behind whatever he was trying to pull. You take his form in now, some obnoxious animal print shirt with half the buttons undone tucked into red tight pants, a matching loose red jacket on top with the sleeves pulled up to show his angry veins.

Why did you care? Why did you drive like a maniac for a man you pretended didn’t exist anymore? Why did your heart break when you heard everything he’d done, why was your first thought not disgust when you did but worry?

His right arm is covered in tattoos, you want to reach out and touch them, admire them, he always talked about getting some but could never decide what he wanted. Your gaze moves up to his face that still refuses to acknowledge you, even though it’s full of hate he’s still the soft boy you fell in love with, his hair is a lot longer now, you don’t think he’s cut it as often since he left. Correction: since you told him to leave.

The thought has Jungkook burning with fire, one his friends saw through his eyes when they asked why he left. He wanted to yell it at them each time they asked, you left first, maybe not physically but emotionally you left first, you ended it not him, you were the one to break his heart over your own stupid insecurities.

He wants to laugh, you ended a three year relationship and four year friendship over something so stupid, and he hated you for it. He hates you, he’d repeat it in his head until it rang true, he hates you.

One of his new friends wolf whistles at you and he finally takes in the very thin material of your pjs before throwing this ‘friend’ a warning glare. You ignored it anyway, the man in front of you was the only thing that mattered.

“Jungkoo-”

“Get out,” he’s quick to cut you off, and you feel the blade he uses to do it. Fine, you deserved that. “Go home.”

He’s finally looking at you, and you wished he weren’t. You never wanted to see him look at you like that, and it killed you where you stood.

He thinks it’s a trick of light, the new moisture in your eyes, but it forces him to look away before he can drink your features in. You still looked the same, but you looked at him with a mixture of disappointment and sadness he couldn’t stomach. You had no right to look at him like that, his fists clenched on the bar top.

Yugeom finally joins you both from whatever corner of the pub he was hiding, he could see it wasn’t going well and really didn’t want to butt in but the battle of Jungkook’s fire and your ice was not fun to watch. He visibly cringed when Jungkook gave him a look that made him feel his betrayal, but he didn’t give him much of a choice. Jungkook took in his friends black eye... maybe he felt a little twinge of guilt.

“Take her home Yugeom,” he said with a bite.

“He doesn’t tell me what to do,” you respond before he can. “Yugi wait outside.”

But apparently you tell him what to do? He’s about to speak for himself but realises while Jungkook might be physically capable of killing him, he somehow finds you ten times scarier and decides to heed your words. He knows in his heart anyway, while Jungkook might look like he wants to throw you into a ditch and leave you for dead, he’d kill anyone that dared to touch you.

As he leaves he misses the way the trash Jungkook is now friends with walk up to you both.

“Wow Jungkook, are the hoes you slept with now stalking you?” One laughs as his words throw cold water on your face. “Cute jimjams babe but JK doesn’t double dip if you know what I mean.”

Did this asshole seriously have the audacity to wink at you?

“I would gladly dip in though,” his hands grab your wrist and you physically might be sick before you punch him but it’s Jungkook that tears his claws away from you. You’ve not seen this look on his face before as he bends his associates wrist back and out of place. You startle at the cry from the asshole as he falls to his knees.

“Don’t touch her,” it’s more of a promise than a warning, but his voice puts shivers down your back. You place your hand softly on his wrist to stop him, you always thought your Kookie couldn’t hurt a fly, but you soon realise this was not your Kookie anymore. His seething look didn’t change as he addressed you, he takes his other hand pulling your wrist off him with force and dragging you out of the smoke filled establishment.

“Get in the car and go home,” his pace doesn’t falter, his fingers biting into your skin so hard it hurts, but you don’t mind, you deserve it. You feel the cold this time when he leads you outside, shivering more from nerves but you won’t tell him that. He’s about to walk back in and leave you but you grab a fistful of his shirt and hold him in place.

“We need to talk,” you don’t even know what you want to say, but he can’t carry on like this. This mess he’s become was not your intention when you broke up with him, none of this was meant to happen. He was meant to realise how much better off he was without you, find a girl worthy of his time and affection, move on and forget all about you, the way you knew you could never do.

“What do you want to talk about Y/n?” Hes mocking you, it didn’t take a genius to figure it out. “Should we talk about how you don’t have a say in my life anymore or how you broke up with me and have no right to be here!”

If he slapped you it might’ve hurt less. His breath stops in his throat when he realises you’re crying, and you see a glimpse of your Kookie coming back. His feautures soften as he takes in your tears, he wipes it away without thinking, muscle memory from the past.

You take his face into your palms and makes sure he’s looking at you, really looking at you as you confess the thoughts you’ve had since the day you your relationship started.

“Kookie I am so sorry,” you say it with purpose, you don’t know for what other than to make sure he’s heard you. “I am so sorry that my perfect Kookie had the misfortune to fall in love with an awful human being like me.”

His heart breaks a little, he wanted you to apologise for breaking up with him, he wanted you to say you made a mistake and ask for him to come home, but you were still wrapped up in the self hate that destroyed your relationship. He has to look away from you, jaw ticking as he tries to stop himself from crying in front of you. He still loved you, you still loved him, but he wasn’t doing this again, he wasn’t going to beg you to love yourself the way he loved you.

He doesn’t know who made you insecure like this, who made the voice in your head sour when it came to yourself, but he didn’t hear the whispers that surrounded you both when you got together. He didn’t hear how many people wondered why the perfect man chose you over anyone else.

“I’m not going to argue with you about this Y/n,” when did he stop calling you Noona, you hated your name when it came out of his mouth with spite and pity. You didnt want him to pity you.

“I loved you so much, and you pushed me away because you couldn’t love yourself,” he was getting angry again, and despite saying he didn’t want to reignite this age old battle, he couldn’t help it. “You let your insecurities and self hate ruin everything we built, we were made for each other and you threw me out like I was nothing!”

You wanted to disagree with him, he was everything to you, that’s why you had to let him go. He couldn’t see the way you were holding him back.

“You can’t see it yet, but it’s better this way,” you feel bile in your throat as you say it.

He wants to rip his own hair out and scream at you.

“Really Y/n?” He scoffs, looking around him at the life he had without you. “Is it really better this way? Is this what you wanted for me?”

“No!” Youre quick to reply. “It wasn’t meant to be like this, you’re so good Kookie, you’re nothing like this.” Your hand finds his cheek again, caressing him as if it would make him believe you, see it the way you do.

“You have such a big heart, such a pure smile,” you don’t mention his laugh, how it made you happy to hear it ringing through the house, how you pretended to hate how he teased you just to hear him laugh. You don’t tell him how empty the house was without it. “You don’t see it yet Kookie, but you would have in five years, ten years, how much of a mistake you made choosing me, and by that point how muchof your life would you have wasted?”

He’s getting a headache, he can feel his temple pulse at how angry you’re making him with your words.

“It’s my life, I wanted to spend it with you,” he mutters, eyes closed. Why did he want to press his face in your hands? You were the one causing him this headache, but he wanted you to soothe it away, soothe the the ache caused by last 10 months spent away from you. “But you didn’t want that, and I left, now respect my desicion and leave me alone.”

“What the hell are you doing Jungkook? You don’t smoke, you don’t do drugs, or sleep arou-”

“You did this when you broke up with me!” He seethes, removing your hand from his face, the daggers in his glare back with full force.

You didn’t want to hear that, you didn’t want this.

“You said I was too good for you,” he’s back to mocking you again. “So consider this me coming down to your level.”

He didn’t mean it, he was just a mess, all he wanted to do was crawl into your arms and ask you to hold him until the pain went away, but he couldn’t so he lashed out at you instead.

“Am I lowly enough for you now Y/n? Do you finally feel like you’re better than me so we can continue this relationship?”

He doesn’t stop when he sees you crying, he knows his words are like a stab in your heart, but the bandages around his own are seeping with blood at the wounds you reopened, the ones that couldn’t heal anyway.

“I still love you so much,” he confesses. “Even though you tore out my fucking heart, I love you so much.”

“I know,” you whimper, he didn’t expect that. “I know, and it scared the shit out of me.”

His eyes go round at your confession, you had trouble being vulnerable with him throughout your relationship but you needed this out of your chest before it poisoned you any further, you needed him to understand how selfish you really were.

“You loved me so much it terrified me, I didn’t want you to wake up one day realising how much of a mistake you made being with me because it would completely break my heart so I decided to break yours first!” Youre yelling at him like this is all his fault, and he lets you. “I was protecting myself.”

It’s his turn to take your face into his palms, he swallows the sob he feels in his throat as he forces you to look up at him.

“Do you really hate yourself that much Noona?” He can’t stop his bottom lip from quivering as he watches you cry in his hands. “You hate yourself so much you didn’t give yourself a chance to be happy, you didn’t give me a chance to make you happy.”

“You did make me happy,” you correct him with a sob, as much as you wanted this to be over you didn’t want him to blame himself, not for a second. “It scared me so much.”

It would take a second to take it all away from you so you decided to take it away from yourself, Jungkook wouldn’t understand how self destructive you were, how much of a mess lied inside of you, although you were selfish you still loved him enough to not let your darkness wrap around his light.

He just wished you believed his light was enough for you both. He squishes your cheeks a little, kissing the lips that puckered in his touch. He couldn’t help it, he just wanted to kiss it all away, but he knew he couldn’t. You don’t open your eyes at his kiss, you let yourself feel it before taking it away from yourself again. He pulls back to let his forehead rest against your own.

“Take me back,” his voice is firm, he wasn’t going to let you do this to yourself anymore. “Let’s go home.”

Let’s undo the last ten months, he wanted to plead but left it unsaid. You shake your head, ever stubborn against him. He lets out a tsk, and decides to peck your lips again.

“Noona, you didn’t give me a choice in leaving, I’m not giving you a choice in taking me back.”

“Koo-” you start with a sob but he cuts you off with another kiss. He can see all the scars you caused yourself in your eyes when you open them, so he peppers kisses all over your face, trying to soothe them.

You want to ask him why he wants you back after all the pain you caused him, you want to ask him why he loves a broken soul, why after everything you’ve done he kisses you so softly but you can’t find your voice. You can’t stop the cries caught in your throat, sounding like a wounded puppy with every attempt of breath. His arms wrap around you, pulling you into his chest as you break down.

You thought you came to rescue him, but it seemed like he was saving you from drowning in yourself.

redemption | jeon jungkook

part two of stoic

➛ pairing(s): ex-husband!jungkook x reader

➛ genre(s): angst, smut, exes au

➛ summary: it’s been years since you and jungkook got a divorce and separated, and you’re both suffering in your individual ways. jungkook, still dealing with the consequences of his selfish and heartless actions, and you? you must tackle life as a single mother…

➛ warning(s): swearing, mentions of infidelity and untrustworthiness, mentions of divorce, jungkook gets his karma and reader is much more cautious now, special guest star namjoon, dom!jungkook, sub!reader, fingering, oral (fem. receiving), unprotected vaginal sex, rough sex, crying during sex, breast and nipple play, creampie, squirting 

➛ word count: 6,830 words

➛ author’s note: after such high demand, a second part has been made and this will be the final one. hope you all enjoy <3

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