Latest Posts by kelpforestfire - Page 3

nothing scarier than being a fan of a fic and then becoming mutuals with the author. like hi shakespeare. big fan of your fake dating au

I love Josh’s anti-classism so much. I grew up in a single parent household that didn’t have time/the ability to cook. I taught myself as an adult and ended up loving it. I cook with this stuff a lot. Shit, the RealLemon juice ends up in a lot of my cocktails. Sure, I like fancy ingredients when I can afford them and I have things I get picky about using - but I have bad hands, mincing garlic is painful as fuck. There’s a lot to be said for knowing how to work with what you have. Don’t shame people for trying, don’t shame people for feeding their families things that they enjoy.

One more joke hate: You may claim to be a woman but biologically you are a featherless biped and thus a man.

Finally a good argument for why I'm actually a man

tumblr notifs: Mutual™ has liked your post

me: *clicks on the button to see which post* I must know which of my humble offerings have pleased my dearest.

"what if a dangerous man pretends to be trans to-" what if we actually dealt with the underlying causes of dangerous men. what if predators faced real consequences more often. what if you stopped using trans women as a proxy for your grievances with liberal feminism's individualist denial of the need to fight systemic issues.

what if you stopped assigning blame for patriarchy's evils to one of its more vulnerable victim groups.

What’s crazy is you can just meet someone and have no idea they’re going to change your life forever

fuck it. be creative even if you never really *make* anything. write out plot synopses of stories and then move on. design OCs you'll never use. make mood boards and concept art and don't do anything with them. life's too short to forget everything that inspired you and creation doesn't have to be "complete" to be worth the time you put into it.

bring back tumblr ask culture let me. bother you with questions and statements

We’re doomed oh I mean good morning. I guess

Aiskhylos tr. by Anne Carson, An Oresteia; “Agamemnon”

Am I annoying? Yes

Do I give a fuck? Also yes I really am sorry about me all the time

Not "humans are inherently good" or "humans are inherently evil" but a secret third thing (humans are inherently social animals which means that we're very good at cooperating and being compassionate towards those we perceive as being part of our community but we're also very good at being tribal and violent towards those we perceive as threats to our community and everyone defines their community differently)

man i have GOT to do this thing. *doesnt do it*

Sharing my writing with other people is always going to feel vulnerable, no matter how many times I do it or how others respond. I doubt I'm the only one that gets nervous when posting online, so thought I'd share this:

Things that help when sharing my fics

1. Make sure I have a project or something to work on straight after posting

gives me something to think about other than how my fic is doing

stops me sitting there constantly refreshing ao3

ideally something not related to ff (so no WIPs)

2. Try to not look at tumblr/my ao3 until at least the next morning

gives me (hopefully) something to look forward to in the morning

keeps me from constantly checking if I know I'm going to check it all at once

my ao3 comment emails are disabled for this reason

having any other fics that I want to read open in their own tab also helps so I don't have to click on my user

3. Post about an hour before I'm planning to sleep

posting close to bedtime makes #2 easier, but

I also need to factor in time to calm down after the initial nerves

4. Read some other recently posted fics

partly I do this regardless of whether or not I've posted recently

but also it's nice reading other people's work knowing they're probably out there at that exact moment experiencing something similar

I've found some of my absolute fav ff writers this way

careful that if you do this you're not comparing

5. Be extra kind to myself

chances are my anxiety is going to be running high

this means I tend to be extra critical of myself for about a day after posting something

it helps to remind myself that there's a reason my inner critic is in hyperdrive

but that also means no reading, writing, or editing my own work

6. If nothing else, remember I had fun

remind myself that once the anxiety has passed I'll have a new chapter/fic from my favourite ff writer (me) to look forward to

and if even one other person reads it and enjoys it, I've made a new friend :)

Of course this is a checklist for the ideal scenario. There are other factors and days when my anxiety is already running high for other reasons. This isn't a set of commandments or a rulebook, it's a guide to help myself.

If it's not helping in the moment, I do something different.

Nothing hits harder than finding a fic that understands your favorite character better than canon ever did.

Music Shuffle Game

thanks for the tag! @heartsoncover @waytootiredforthistoo @localwolfgoesawooo

rules: shuffle your ‘on repeat’ playlist and post the first 10 songs, then tag 10 friends to do the same

- movement (hozier)

- I did something bad (Taylor Swift)

- electric Love (børns)

- AVA (natalie jane)

- dancing with your ghost (sasha slone)

- almost (hozier)

- sunday best (surfaces)

- bloom (the paper kites)

- handlebars (flobots)

- still into you (paramore) 

(np tags: @middleagedenragedmama @lina-alaska @penguin-liz @under-pink-skys @starprongs @itsradla @stopallsnowblind @but-im-a-vampire @smodernlife @ilisarr sorry if you've already been tagged, ++anyone else who wants to join in)

ok i have a plan (gets distracted) (gets distracted) (gets distracted) (gets distracted) (get distracted) (gets d

tonight's vibe

In Gedanken , In Thought - Ruprecht von Kaufmann , 2020.

German ,b. 1974 -

Oil on linoleum on wood , 40 x 30 cm.

miss this already!

first fest ❣️

first fic 🖤🖤🖤

first time mod 💗

this was such a joy to be a part of!

eventual goal to read every single fic!!

special shout out to everyone who comments 🫶

This fest is now completed!

Thank you to everyone who took part, this ended up so much bigger than we ever expected and it was so lovely to see everyone come together for this <3

We hope you enjoy reading, sharing, and engaging with everything produced, here's to the women and genderqueers in fandom! 💞💞

And a special thank you to the moderators for making this happen: @badhairred @heartsoncover @starprongs @lemonlans @middleagedenragedmama @itsradla @kelpforestfire

Below is all of the navigations for this page and fest

✨ Number of Submissions ✨

Fics: 124

Edits: 8

Artworks: 24

✨ AO3 COLLECTION ✨

You can find the fest AO3 collection with all the fics and artworks in here !

✨ ART ✨

You can find art in our collection above, and through the #HPFemFest2025 art tag on the account <3

✨ EDIT MASTERLIST ✨

Click here to find all the edit links !

✨ RESOURCES ✨

This post here has a collection of US-centric resources for you to support as we navigate this presidency.

J.K. Rowling is still a massive transphobe, and for how much I love this story and the Marauders fandom in particular (which was supposed to be a safe space for trans people and the biggest rejection of her, where the majority of the creators are trans and we made the characters queer in every possible way!), I understand why we keep coming back to it for nostalgia because I grew up with it too. However, I still don't agree with giving more of my money to her because she is actively supporting organizations that work to strip trans people of their rights, actively hurting them. She is also using her platform to spread transphobia and hate quite regularly. I don't understand how you can say you support trans people and that you hate her if you think it’s okay to give her your money by supporting the new Harry Potter TV show, going on tours of the Harry Potter studio, continuing to buy official merchandise, playing the official games, or even purchasing the books again. Unfortunately, she is still alive and using her money in that way. While we can't take back what we already gave her before knowing what she stood for, we can stop moving forward.

And the transphobic people in the fandom who always have negative comments about trans or gender non-conforming HEADCANONS in a fandom that is almost entirely made up from the fans can simply go fuck themselves.

You shouldn't be welcomed in this space, and it's unacceptable that you make trans creators feel unsafe and attempt to harass them out of it. You should be the ones feeling unwanted here, not them, and if you're part of any other queer label, you should be deeply ashamed of yourself.

Look up your own history and realize that without trans people, you would have exactly zero rights. When they are in danger, that danger will not stay away from you because cishet homophobic people don't care that you're not trans. They will hate you because you're queer. You're not saving yourself by trying to remove the "T" from the community, and trans people have always been the ones to fight the hardest for all of us, even while being the most marginalized.

So learn your history and be smart about it at least, if you really can't have basic empathy for other people simply because they are trying to live and be happy like everyone else.

To all the others that say that they do care, show it with your actions, support trans creators and avoid giving your money to JKR

I hate that SEPTember OCTOber NOVember and DECember aren’t the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th months.

best!

gift!

ever!

new scene from an amazing fic!! never getting over this 🥰

if you haven't already, go read Godlight! I'm proof you do not have to know F1 to enjoy the fic!

Godlight deleted scene - 18+ MDNI

Okay so this is a little deleted scene from chapter 22 of Godlight. I scrapped the idea because I wanted the whole scene to feel sweet and romantic and not a smut-focused part, but for the birthday of my lovely @kelpforestfire I dug it up and you can all enjoy it. If you want the context read the last part of chapter 22 and stop at “I have the feeling you will be a natural.”

Regulus looks up at James with that gleam in his eye that makes James’ whole inside flip around. The corner of his mouth tugs up when he turns away from the counter to lean against it and regard James fully. “What makes you think that?” 

His voice is smooth like honey and James can feel his skin break into goosebumps as Regulus moves his hand to James’ lower arm. There is a challenge in that touch and James battles his instincts to just wrap the man up in his arms and lift him onto the counter. 

He finds a middle ground by bringing his hand to Regulus’ cheek and leaning in to peck the man’s lips chastity so they can get back to the task at hand. What he doesn’t realise is that his hand is covered in flour, leaving a white streak against the flushed cheek that he had just cupped. James chuckles as he attempts to wipe it away but Regulus has already noticed. 

“Did you just smear me with flour?” Regulus asks incredulously and James can’t help but laugh louder at Regulus’ scowl. 

He pulls up a brow with glee as he shrugs. “So what if I did?” 

“Nope, I’m not doing this,” Regulus retorts, pushing James off him and turning to the flour-covered counter, reaching for one of the two balls of dough James has laid out. “We’re not having a food fight.” 

“Oh, but Fres, it would be so romantic,” James fake pouts as he comes to stand behind the man. His earlier admission of keeping the date sweet goes out the window when he encloses his body around Regulus and can feel his cock strain through his jeans against the other’s arse. 

“No,” Regulus protests, reaching for the bag of flour anyway. “It would be corny.” 

James sees it coming, but he is still hit fully in the face with the flour Regulus throws over his shoulder. He splutters while Regulus just laughs as he looks around. 

“You are such a hypocrite,” James says lowly, while he nuzzles his face into the crook of Regulus’ neck to wipe it clean from the flour before planting his lips just beneath Regulus’ ear, right on the tiny mole that lives there. 

This makes Regulus shudder and let out an involuntary ‘Jamie’ that shoots through James’ full body. “What is it, Fres?” James drawls. “Don’t like playing your own game.”

“You’re a dick,” Regulus groans when James takes his studded lobe into his ear and sucks lightly before making his lips travel up to the top of Regulus’ ear. “Are you supposed to fuck on the first date?” 

“Who says we are fucking?” James counters, letting one hand find Regulus’ hip before it travels up his sweater. The other hand reaches for something on the counter. “That would be insanely cheesy.” 

Regulus has no time to protest because James is putting the little piece of Mozarella he grabbed into his mouth quickly. Verbally, he isn’t able to admonish James but the sharp snap of his hips makes James groan lowly when his arse connects to James’ cock almost painfully. 

James reels back from that, giving Regulus the space to turn around quickly. “That was the worst thing I have ever heard come from your mouth, and that is saying something.” 

“And still you agreed to date me,” James grimaces through his half pain, half arousal. 

“I am starting to doubt that decision,” Regulus sighs, rolling his eyes but contradicting his statement as he reaches his hand out to grab James’ shirt and drags him back into his personal space so he can crash his lips to James. 

There is no thought about holding back in that kiss. It’s pure passion and James’ mind goes blank with anything else except for a steady breathing of Regulus’ name that follows the pulse of the blood rushing in his ears. 

He wraps his arms around Regulus, painting the back of his sweater in white flour as he hugs the man close to him. The fist in James’ shirt tightens while Regulus’ free hand comes to tangle into James’ hair so he can pull him even closer. Opening his mouth greedily, James darts his tongue out, plunging it into Regulus’ mouth. The other greets him all too willingly and their tongues dance together as if they are both fighting to get the upper hand. 

James roams his hands from Regulus’ back to his shoulders and back down towards his arse, where he squeezes lightly. It’s not just an excuse to touch his boyfriend but also a silent command. One that Regulus easily follows as he stands on his tiptoes and lets himself be lifted onto the counter. 

They break the kiss, panting heavily as they both realise what James has just done, setting Regulus down in the middle of the flour-covered counter. Regulus looks to where the white powder has dusted up and is now covering the better part of his pants. The emerald eyes shoot back up to James with a different fire blazing in them than James had welcomed just a moment before. 

“James Fleamont–”

James cuts Regulus off by kissing him again, his hands cupping Regulus' head quickly to keep him where he can’t lean back and scold James for his recklessness. To be fair, Regulus has complied just as well, but James knows the Frenchman will conveniently forget that little detail. 

It works. Regulus melts back into James just as easily as before, forgetting all about his ruined pants. James smirks against his lips and he swears he hears Regulus mutter ‘idiot’ between their lips, but the soft pressure of teeth against his bottom lip makes James gasp and the word gets lost in the air between them. 

“Fuck, Fres, I–” James pants as his lack of oxygen is becoming a problem. Regulus doesn’t seem to have the patience to wait for James to catch his breath. He is already dragging his teeth down James’ throat, sucking on his collarbone while his hands work open the button of James’ jeans. 

The feeling of Regulus’ ring against the skin of his lower abdomen snaps him out of his haze for a moment and he leans back, just out of the reach of Regulus’ mouth that had shifted to the other side of James’ neck. “Fres,” James pants, trying to get his half-hearted protest out of his mouth. “The pizza’s–” 

“Forget the pizza, Jamie,” Regulus tells him with dark eyes and danger in his voice that has James stepping back into his arms immediately. He looks through his thick lashes as he continues. “I’d rather eat you.” 

James is gone. No saving him. 

The moan from his throat announces his surrender and Regulus knows it. He grins wickedly before continuing where he left off when James had so rudely interrupted him. 

Sliding from the counter, Regulus takes James’ jeans with him as he kneels to the ground. James has to brace himself against the counter as Regulus pulls out his cock and starts sucking him with such vigour James fears he might collapse any second. One hand is slipping through the flower, the other is wound tightly in Regulus’ still-damp curls. 

“Oh, joder, joder, que se siente–” James spreads his legs a little, so Regulus isn’t squashed between the counter and his knees. The feeling of his lips around his head, the warmth of his mouth engulfing and letting go of him in rapid succession makes the tension in his spine skyrocket. James thought by now he has built a decent stamina, but it is Regulus. He can have the man make love to him every day and he would still have trouble holding onto his orgasm to not come the second the man did anything remotely passionate to him. 

He can feel the fire in his chest burning bright and hot. His fingers pull on Regulus’ curls before James realises what he is doing. He drags the man up to his feet, kissing him fiercely for a moment before letting his own hands find Regulus’ pants buttons and opening them.

“Please, sweetheart,” James pants against his lips. “Let me have you before I lose my mind.” 

Regulus just moans and nods, willingly turning around and laying his chest on the counter. His feet only barely reach the floor, only the tips of his toes finding any purchase on the tiles. James’ mind spins with the sight of Regulus like this, splayed out over his kitchen counter, arse bare, legs spread and his cheek pressed in the remaining flour. 

“Fuck me, Jamie,” Regulus commands. His face lifts a little so he can look James in the eyes, that gaze burning into his own retina. 

“Shit, on it, yes, god’s Regulus, don’t–” James scrambles his brain together as he looks around frantically. He can’t just fuck Regulus dry, it would hurt like a bitch and the last thing he wants right now is to hurt his boyfriend. He wants to make him feel good, even in the situation he is in, he is determined to make Regulus scream in only pleasure. 

His eyes land on the glass bottle he keeps his oil in and his hand is already reaching when Regulus kicks his leg out with a huff. “Absolutely not, go grab lube from the bedroom.” 

“But–” James tries to smirk through his lust-muddled brain, but Regulus isn’t letting him get a word in. 

“Now, or I will get up and walk out the door.” 

That has James moving quickly. Kicking his jeans –that was still pooling around his ankles– off before sprinting through his hallway to the bedroom, grabbing the bottle he kept in his nightstand before running back as quickly as he can manage.

Regulus is laying seemingly still on the counter but James’ eye falls quickly on his hand that is wrapped around himself, storking lazily. He resumes his place behind Regulus, lubing up his fingers and pushing two into the man while his other hand comes around the front and take over Regulus’ own movements. 

“My job,” he growls low, as he works Regulus open. The man moans in response and James feels his impatience wash over him. He won’t hurt Regulus, so he takes his time prepping the him, but James is buzzing with excitement. The whole scene is a bit scandalous and James revels in the idea of what he is about to do to his boyfriend on his kitchen counter. 

“Merde, Jamie,” Regulus pants, as James angels his fingers just right. “I– I’m ready, please.” 

James doesn’t need to be told twice, removing his fingers and using the residue lube to slick up his own cock before guiding it to Regulus’ entrance. “Fuck, hell, you’re perfect,” James groans as he pushes inside, his free hand grabbing onto Regulus’ hip so tightly he is sure it will bruise. 

Regulus doesn’t seem to mind. He lifts himself a little higher on his toes, giving James a better angle to thrust into him that he gladly utilises. 

“There, right there!” Regulus moans, his mouth going slack as his body moves against the counter on the rhythm of James’ thrusts. His eyes are closed but the expression of complete and utter bliss is so clear on Regulus’ face that the fire of passion and lust burns even hotter as pride is added into the mix. 

“You look so gorgeous like this,” James groans, leaning his full body over Regulus to kiss his cheek, the residue of flour transferring from Regulus’ cheek to James’ lips. He doesn’t mind one bit. 

Regulus opens his eyes and lets out of scoff. “I bet, covered in flour and messily getting fucked is a real sight.” 

James thrusts in hard, once, twice, making Regulus let out a sound between a grunt and a moan. “Don’t contradict me when I call you beautiful. You are beautiful, and so–” thrust, “fucking,” thrust, “good!” 

“Merde, J– Jamie, I’m gonna–” 

James doesn’t need the warning because he can feel Regulus grow in his hand, his orgasm approaching fast and James doubles down to make sure his boyfriend falls off the edge in the best way possible. 

“Come with me, sweetheart,” James breathes in Regulus’ ear, keeping his thrusts as steady as he can while his own pleasure builds and builds, together with Regulus’. 

“Oh fucking, shit,” Regulus moans, as he pushes back on James’ cock one last time before spilling over his hand, onto the counter and against the cabinets with James’ name on his lips. James releases his own tightly held pleasure and comes inside Regulus before collapsing forward onto the smaller mans back. They heave together, coming down from their high when Regulus chuckles.

“What?” James breathes heavily, shifting to the side so he can look at Regulus without sliding out of him yet. 

“I don’t think we can use this batch of dough anymore,’ he murmurs as he lifts his torso a little and pulls a piece of body-flattened dough from under his stomach. 

James blinks. He hadn’t realised that has been laying underneath Regulus the whole time. But when he sees it the laugh bursts from him as well and Regulus rolls his eyes before throwing the piece in his hand at James’ face with a muttered ‘dick’. 

“I think we better wash up and try again?”

James stands than, helping Regulus straighten up as well and laughing again as the full piece of dough falls from Regulus’ body. 

“And actually make the pizza’s now?” Regulus asks, the hope audible in his tone.

James smiles, plucking a piece of dried flower from Regulus’ curls before leaning down to kiss the man. “What did you think? I’m not giving up pizza.”

My fanfic has two kudos. Two people liked my writing. I'm so fucking happy I feel like I'm at an awards show and people are throwing roses on the stage. /gen

Top 10 favourite hp characters???

1. auntie muriel [she's firing out banger after banger from the second she arrives on the page and she sustains that level until the moment the wedding ends - fantastic energy, i love to see it]

2. that auld fella at the quidditch world cup who refuses to wear trousers [live your truth, king]

3. dawlish [both voldemort and dumbledore take the time to point out that he's completely incompetent and then the conclusion of his character arc is him getting fucking wrecked by an old lady]

4. mrs cole [day-drinking is a proud tradition and i'm delighted she honoured it - harry being genuinely impressed by how much she can put away is one of the funniest things he ever does]

5. the portrait in st mungo's which claims ron has spattergroit and which deserves to be thanked for clearly inspiring his cover-story in deathly hallows

6. gladys gudgeon, who doesn't abandon her devotion to lockhart, even after his brain injury

7. madam rosmerta [she manages to sustain her position as the hottest woman in hogsmeade over a period of at least twenty years - unmatched aura]

8. the employee at the owl office who received a postal order form from a cat and thought "legit"

9. piers polkiss [yer man finessed multiple day-trips out of the dursleys, what a #girlboss]

10. hagrid's dad [he walked so that the monster-fucking girlies on tumblr could run, and don't you forget it]

this fits my story so well

just yes!

”i hate you for what you did” bellatrix and “and i miss you like a little kid” narcissa about Andromeda

you know a fic is good when it has this