Being Mutuals Is Like We’ve Never Talked But I Saw Your Vent Post And Do You Want Me To Kill That Person

When someone you love offers a bid for connection, you say yes every time. When someone sends you an article, a video, a funny post, it’s a bid for connection. They are trying to connect with you. When someone shares details about their day, their life, their thoughts, or their feelings with you, that is a bid for connection. They want to connect with you on a deeper level. They are trying to pull you into their world. If you love them, you say yes every time. Yes, even if the article they send is not particularly interesting to you. Yes, even if it means listening to them ramble about a game you don’t care about and think is stupid. Yes yes yes. And let’s hope they always say yes to your bids, too.

Today I’m thinking about how Harry loves people so much and has no idea how to communicate it. (Which is, frankly, a Huge Mood.)

This is clearest at times when Ron is feeling unloved, and Harry is baffled, hurt, and angry. How could Ron possibly feel unloved, when he’s the most important person in the world to Harry? And we’re sitting there reading thinking… yeah, okay, but how… would Ron know that? Have you ever, you know… done anything to indicate how much you care about Ron? You understand Ron can’t actually read your internal narration, right?

Part of what makes Hinny such a great couple is that Ginny seems to be… better at reading Harry’s feelings than most people. Like. We really have the impression that Harry can sit there and adore Ginny, and she can tell he adores her. (One of my favorite Hinny tropes is Ginny being Harry’s feelings coach… like, Ron comes back from Australia and Ginny nudges Harry like, “Tell him you missed him.” “What? Of course I missed him.” “Tell him anyway.”)

Anyway. Harry is very sweet and sad and I love him, I guess that’s the point of this post.

“oh no we need to practice for our fake dating” is the funniest trope to me cause like. there are so many people who force themselves into a shitty relationship they hate just because of amatonormatiivity that it’s an ingrained part of popular culture to joke about hating your partner.

which is to say, oh my god you dont need to hold hands and go on fake dates, you don’t even need to agree on a single detail of your cover story beforehand. you can literally stand 6 feet apart at all times and look profoundly uncomfortable and all anyone will think is “yikes™. not my problem”

TW: Pedophilia

Teenagers are rarely taught the reason why they can't consent to sex with adults.

And that's because teaching them that would completely unravel our coercion-based society.

It can be difficult to explain in detail the exact reason and all the specifics in a way that they will understand. But the simplest way to phrase it is that in some cases, even when someone agrees to something and even when they appear enthusiastic about it, there's too much of a power imbalance that it's no different than forcing them. Also, having power and being abusive doesn't require a conscious expectation to be obeyed.

Imagine a world in which every teenager understood that and was easily able to call out anyone who tried to convince them otherwise.

They'd know that there's no such thing as an employee consenting to working for a poverty wage, working in unsafe conditions, working long hours, or working without taking breaks. They'd know that there's no such thing as consenting to paying a bank overdraft fee. They'd know that there's no such thing as consenting to student loan debt. They'd know that there's no such thing as consenting to medical bills. They'd know that there's no such thing as consenting to generating profit for banks or landlords in order to have a place to live and being evicted or foreclosed when you lose your source of income. They'd know that there's no such thing as consenting to a police search. They'd know that there's no such thing as a child who's okay with their parents spanking them. They'd know that being dependent on someone does not mean that you can never criticize them. They'd know that if it's considered abusive to simply play along when someone obeys, then it has to be much more abusive to actively expect to be obeyed, which many adults do to them.

And people who benefit from a society based on coercion masquerading as freedom wouldn't like that.

So instead, teenagers are taught something dismissive. They're taught that what they want doesn't matter. They're taught that they're too young to know what love is. They're taught "it's the law". They're taught things that are insulting to their intelligence, which they'll naturally rebel against.

Dealing With Executive Dysfunction - A Masterpost

The “getting it done in an unconventional way” method.

The “it’s not cheating to do it the easy way” method.

The “fuck what you’re supposed to do” method.

The “get stuff done while you wait” method.

The “you don’t have to do everything at once” method.

The “it doesn’t have to be permanent to be helpful” method.

The “break the task into smaller steps” method.

The “treat yourself like a pet” method.

The “it doesn’t have to be all or nothing” method.

The “put on a persona” method.

The “act like you’re filming a tutorial” method.

The “you don’t have to do it perfectly” method.

The “wait for a trigger” method.

The “do it for your future self” method.

The “might as well” method.

The “when self discipline doesn’t cut it” method.

The “taking care of yourself to take care of your pet” method.

The “make it easy” method.

The “junebugging” method.

The “just show up” method.

The “accept when you need help” method.

The “make it into a game” method.

The “everything worth doing is worth doing poorly” method.

The “trick yourself” method.

The “break it into even smaller steps” method.

The “let go of should” method.

The “your body is an animal you have to take care of” method.

The “fork theory” method.

The “effectivity over aesthetics” method.

Dear Mr. Black by @languagelessonswolfstar ❄️🌟

This fic got me through Christmas, New Years, and January 20. It was the most beautiful, lovely, and cozy Christmas story. It felt like a warm blanket. The bind is fully inspired by Sirius's cookbook. This is my very first time making a unconventional-sized bind and it took too much brain power to figure it out because me dummy 😭 But I'm so happy with how it turned out. This might be one of my most favorite typesets I've done to date, so this is kind of a typeset appreciate post?

Portrait of the magnificent Chef Sirius Black was done by the most talented @blackthornwine 🥹🥹

The bind is now in its new home at @moonysbookshelves who adores this story as much as I do. Thank you for all the yaps dude 🫶🏻

When the world is basically on fire right now, you can find a perfect escape in Dear Mr. Black. It can be read for free on AO3. Enjoy the meal! 🍽️

I love Josh’s anti-classism so much. I grew up in a single parent household that didn’t have time/the ability to cook. I taught myself as an adult and ended up loving it. I cook with this stuff a lot. Shit, the RealLemon juice ends up in a lot of my cocktails. Sure, I like fancy ingredients when I can afford them and I have things I get picky about using - but I have bad hands, mincing garlic is painful as fuck. There’s a lot to be said for knowing how to work with what you have. Don’t shame people for trying, don’t shame people for feeding their families things that they enjoy.