U CANT MAKE THIS UP 😭

PLEASE HE WOULD HE’S SO DUMB

Luke: You wanna hear some dark humor?

Y/N: Oh yeah I love dark humor.

Luke: Alright. *turns off lights*

Luke: Knock Knock-

Y/N: Turn the damn lights back on.

the special relationship is as strong as ever, lads

Masquerade - Kate Bishop

Marvel

Request: Nopeee

Summary: Kate Bishop x fem!Reader. Your first New Year with Kate. (Pre-Set Relationship)

Words: 722

Warnings: Minor Hawkeye Spoilers. Also sorry if the pacing is a little off I haven’t written in a while.

-

The mask sat snugly on her face as she glanced around through hooded lashes. She was completely out of her element. Y/N didn’t come from money unlike Kate so she had no idea on how to act at parties like this. Although Kate wasn’t doing well either, she was also feeling quite out of place. Maybe that’s why she and Y/N had gotten along so easily, birds of a feather flock together you know. But neither of them said a word of their discomfort assuming the other wanted to be at the party. 

Kate was off getting drinks for them whilst Y/N waited for her in the corner of the room next to a large glass window overlooking the entire city. This was the first party they’d been to like this, by this meaning high society, they’d been to since Kate’s mom… you know. They would rather not talk about that on such a joyous occasion though or rather one that was meant to be joyous. A few people had tried to start conversations with both of them but they weren’t feeling very social at the moment. In fact, Kate wasn’t sure why she had dragged them to the party in the first place, one of her friends had convinced her to go but she was beginning to wonder why she had given in so easily to the peer pressure. 

Kate sat next to Y/N on the couch she was currently sitting on. Kate handed the flute of liquid to her. The champagne was by far the most expensive thing Y/N had ever held yet still tasted the same as the cheap stuff. Kate met eyes with her girlfriend and saw the same look of boredom in her eyes that Kate currently had in her own. So she clinked glasses with Y/N and took her by the hand leading her to the elevator realizing neither of them actually wanted to be there, she waved a goodbye to the hostess.

Once in the elevator Kate slipped the black mask off her own face and sighed pressing the button for the roof. “What are we doing?” Y/N hummed at her gorgeous counterpart. Also in the process of speaking taking off the gold mask on her face. Kate just smiled and whispered, “tis’ a surprise.”

The doors dinged open and they made their way to the door outside making sure to prop it open in case it were to lock, although the makeshift doorstop did not look very stable. The cold air prickled at Y/N’s bare shoulders and Kate saw her shiver harshly in her tiny golden dress.

“Sorry I didn’t really prepare for this,” Kate rubbed the back of her neck and shrugged off her jacket. Y/N took it gratefully and they sat near the edge of the building.

 “Now really what are we doing?” Y/N asked again and Kate just shushed the girl.

“Wait for it,” Kate pulled out her phone and clicked for a moment. She propped her phone on the ledge and it displayed a count down. Just a few minutes to go until the new year. Y/N understood and intertwined her fingers with Kate’s own.

 “I’m glad that I’m here with you,” Kate said looking at her girlfriend with adoration. Y/N had been with her through thick and thin even though they’d only been dating a few months. Through the hardest parts of her mother’s arrest and the support of her newfound heroism, she was perfect.

“There’s no one I’d rather be with,” Y/N squeezed Kate’s hand and leaned in for a kiss. Kate held up her free hand and pushed Y/N’s face back. A look of betrayal etched its way onto Y/N’s face. Kate just snickered and pointed at the countdown.

“Literally twelve seconds to go and you can’t be patient,” She rolled her eyes. They began to count down together.

“3.. 2.. 1!” They shared a sweet kiss as fireworks went up all over the city. It was a beautiful sight but they were focused on each other. Y/N smiled into their first kiss of the new year.

“I love you, Kate.”

-

TAGLIST: @speedymaximoff @magnet-girl​ @siennanoelle01​ @kcd15​ @nani-2305​ (Crossed out wouldn’t tag for some reason)

Reading so many tumblr fics has completely ruined me from ever reading a Wattpad story that ain’t in 2nd person POV😭😭

“I hate fandom, it’s everywhere on this site,” Sir (gender-neutral) this is Tumblr, aka the Denny’s parking lot at 3 am of websites.

Of course, fandom is everywhere. Their tagline on the app store used to be “the home of fandom.” You’re the one who walked in here, you can walk yourself right back out.

I don’t care if I lose a thousand followers overnight, but if you think “tranny” or “shemale” are remotely acceptable ways to refer to a transgender person, please unfollow me.

For the puppy🥺

ATTENTION PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I think i have it now and i appreciate it.

I’ve just made a bet against my Dad that if this post gets 2 million notes then i can get a Puppy. [like the one underneath]

I didn’t realise how much 2 million was and i couldn’t take that number down now. It should look like 2,000,000 in the notes bar.

He’s convinced that this will never reach that number, and very confident about it so Let’s prove him wrong!! He thinks this will get about 25 notes beofre it’s left in the dust.

You don’t have to do it for me. But for the point and to prove him wrong. He has to pay and everything so let’s make him suffer with it!!

I’m counting on you!!!

Remember it’s 2,000,000!

best player, best bet.

pairings. hockey!jj maybank x fem!reader, hockey!rafe cameron x fem!reader

part three of n/a parts.

about. you and jj go shopping for a dress

part one, part two, part three

warnings. swearing, gif not mine, abuse :/

ricky rocks. this is to make up for the last part lol (i also hated the way this turned out tbh)

“hello?”

“hey, hockey puck.”

“maybank.”

“don’t sound so excited,” you could hear his stupid grin from the other side of the line, it made your lips twitch slightly as you slowly sat at the edge of your bed.

“what do you want?”

“ward called for a dinner rehearsal,” he mumbled, “i need you there.”

“why?”

he sighed, rubbing his chin, “ward wants to get to know everyone before ‘the big show’, make sure everything moves smoothly.”

“i’ve already met ward,” you gritted, reminiscing about all the times you attended the elizabeth city hockey parties he hosted at the end of the year to celebrate the season. you weren't so fond of him despite him being one of your biggest supporters.

“where are you right now.”

"i'm home.. why?"

it was silent and you could practically hear the gears in his head turn as he thought along with the silence, his lips pressed into a thin line as he paced his room within the cameron house, "you have a dress yet?"

°•

jj had one hand gripping the steering wheel of his truck while the other held the gear shift, tapping his finger lightly so some sound filled the air. but it somehow made the atmosphere more awkward with no words to say and no things to do as you tapped your own fingers against the door, eyes glancing out the window every once and awhile, observing the gloomy air that was slowly falling over obx- - something you always loved when winter took over; when the cold nipped at your cheeks and turned them red, always giving you an excuse to wrap up in blankets and drink excessive amounts of hot drinks.

you tipped your head slightly, your eyes now roaming for something to create thought, and something did once you came to realization after studying the nice interior of the truck; clean, no sign of dirt anywhere. it smelt nice, even as jj's hockey bag was thrown in the backseat, which was unusual because the smell of sweat was always so distinct, even on your own bag, and you would consider yourself a cleanliness person.

jj was from the cut. you knew him and you knew who his friends were. you felt like an asshole thinking it but you had knew him since third grade, when he had came in late on the first day with dirt staining his shirt and face. he was no stranger to fun and you were sometimes envious of it, having the ability to let go and not think.

so why was his truck so clean? you knew but you still asked;

"why do you live with ward?"

he seemed to tense a little, his grip on the wheel tightening while readjusting himself. his other hand no longer held the gear shift but was rather now running a hand through his hair, an audible exhale fizzling past his lips.

maybe you shouldn't have asked...

as well as knowing jj had the nature of letting loose and having no care, you were also aware of his rough home life with his father, something rafe had told you, something you wished you hadn't known.

"never mind, uh sorry-"

"no, no," he shook his head, shooing away your apology, "it's fine. not that big of a deal anyways."

silence and then...

"i've never really had.. anything," he rubbed his lips together, hesitant with whether or not he should be telling this to you, which he knew deep down that he probably shouldn't, but he wanted to, he wanted someone to know. "never anything to anyone until ward. he saw something in me that nobody saw and it was like finally someone cared. that's why i live with him.. i don't have to think about anything, worry about anything anymore because he runs my whole life and there's something comforting about that."

you watched him as he talked, trying his best to explain it while clenching and unclenching his fist around the black leather wheel, keeping a strong focus on the road due to not wanting to look at you.

"but i had to shape up and there's nothing wrong with a little discipline," he tilted his head a little, saying these words as if reminding himself of this. it made your chest tighten as you watched him a little closely with sympathetic eyes, but you weren't sure why.

the dinner rehearsal started at 6:30, giving you and jj an hour to find a black dress for the scout party. the two of you had been at it for already an hour and neither of you could find what you were looking for. but mostly because half the time the two of you were screwing around, trying on things that weren't even black nor a dress. sharing stupid hockey gossip, and even giving each other pointers.

you would have never thought you would ever been hanging out with jj on your free time or even finding joy in his company. it was unusual to say the least, almost wrong, but you couldn't find the nerve to care as you sat across from him in the waiting area of the dressing room.

"you going to try on those dresses or not?" he motioned toward the pile of black dresses the two of you had randomly compiled together before entering into the private area.

"i don't know."

"we got like half an hour before i have to drop you off and get you ready," he checked his phone before looking back up to you, giving you a pointed look. "i should've asked if you can get ready fast."

"i can."

"try on a dress."

you huffed before pulling yourself up to your feet, grabbing onto the pile before walking into the little room meant for changing. the first dress was a no-go right off the bat, the second one didn't even cover half your chest, and the thrid-

"you gonna let me see or not?" jj had himself propped up against the dressing room doorframe by his elbow, waiting for you to finally show him one of the many dresses the two of you had picked out.

"hold on," you slightly mumbled, extending your arm behind you, attempting to reach the zipper.

"i thought you said you got ready fast."

you opened the dressing room door with a annoyed frown, something that quickly lost its effect once you became taken aback when looking up to jj who had a smirk on his face, practically crammed up against you with how close he was leaned up against the doorframe. you huffed, losing the shock while holding the front of the dress tightly against your chest in fear of it slipping.

"i need you to zip me up."

"what?" jj looked caught off guard, now looking you up and down, almost not understanding your question till you turned around, revealing the low zipper the stopped right before your butt. he still looked shocked as his eyes met yours in the body length mirror placed in the center wall of the dressing room before traveling down toward the zipper. "this the dress i picked out?" he coughed, hesitantly clasping the small piece of plastic.

you hummed in reply, diverting your eyes to the ground as the feeling of his knuckles slowly dragging up the middle of you back made your stomach twist into knots. you held your breath as you connected the coldness to the silver ring he wore on his pointer finger.

you could hear him exhale as well the moment the zipper was pulled all the way to the top and he made sure to take a wide step away from you before fully looking you in the eyes. you turned to face him, giving him a lopsided smile before he finally spoke, "looks good."

that was the dress you chose.

°•

"you're late," ward was on jj the moment he had walked through the front door with his hand tightly gripping the boy's bicep, attempting to guide him away and fast toward his room upstairs where you were sure a more formal outfit was laid out for him.

you clenched your jaw as your presences seemed to have been completely shrugged off as you were left at the front door alone.

after you had bought the black dress, jj drove you home to allow you to change. you wore a short purple dress that had practically knocked the breath out of jj due to him never seeing you in anything but your hockey gear and clothes that tended to cover you whole. you had to bite back a smirk.

the whole backyard must have been where everything was being hosted due to that being where everyone was mingling. it made you feel sort of out of place which was rather unusual since you had a the tendency to fit right in when it came to events like these. you had to.

"really went through with it, huh?"

you glanced back to see rafe holding a glass of alcohol. he was dressed up in a button up just like the rest of the boys were with slack pants. you grinned over to him with a slight tip of your head, "you look like a douche."

he scoffed, giving you a look up and down, "okay, princess." he threw back the rest of his drink before setting it down on a table. he shoved his hands in his pockets before strolling to your side, "i thought you were going to keep your dignity and not take his deal."

you shrugged, "i really want to win best player."

"so you're going to fuck him for it?"

you rolled your eyes before planting an elbow to his ribs, "don't be an ass. i've wanted this since elementary school and i think i can get it if jj steps down."

rafe only hummed.

you hadn't seen jj in over a half an hour, and after talking to rafe for what seem like ten minutes, but was really longer, he reminded you of your date. you had lowly swore to yourself before looking around and not finding him until you had walk to the long stretched dock where you found him lighting a blunt.

"a bit of a bad time for that, don't you think?"

he looked back at you with a raised brow as if daring you to stop him, but you only joined his side, planning on keeping your mouth shut until he spoke to you himself.. which seemed unlikely with the only sound filling the air being the waves crashing against the dock and him inhaling and exhaling smoke.

"you mad or something?"

he didn’t say anything but instead kept his eyes trained on the setting sun. the sky swarmed with orange, it made your chest fill with warmth despite beginning to feel uneasy about jj’s now silent demeanor. it didn’t feel right.

you took a step closer to him, trying to get a better look at his face in attempt to get a read on him, but you only felt your stomach drop as your hands couldn’t help but reach for both sides of his face, pulling him to face you.

“jj,” you half gaped, your eyes wide and wild as you had your gaze set upon the newly placed bruise on his cheekbone. “who?”

“who do you think?” he took one last intake before flicking the blunt into the water. his face was warm and seemed to have seeped into your finger tips as they practically cradled his face. “y/n.”

your head tilted from side to side as you tried to gather and look for other bruises or cuts or anything that connected to harm- you couldn’t even think or focus until his own hands grasped your wrists, now making sure you were looking him in the eyes, which were wide themself.

“it doesn’t matter,” he wanted you to understand that, but he knew you wouldn’t with how disappointed you seemed to be at his words, your face falling and slowly loosing your grip. “doesn’t matter, okay?

“you must be stupid if you think i’m going to believe that,” you let go of him, slowly backing away with a deep frown etched into your face. “jj-”

“hockey puck-”

your face fell deeper into despair, “don’t you fucking dare.” your face turned into a scowl and you raised your hand, “that stupid- jj you-”

“everything going alright down here?”

your eyes interchanged toward ward who appeared out of nowhere, with a cautious demeanor. you eyes his closely as he approached the two of you closer with his steps slow and eyes full of hesitation as he scoped out the situation, very aware that something was off.

“yeah, everything’s fine,” jj’s voice was quiet as he stared at you, almost signaling for you to keep your mouth shut with the way his eyes slightly widened. “i have to take y/n home.”

ward nodded, understandably with his hands stuffed into his dress pants pockets, “okay.”

you begun to walk before jj did with your hands tightly gripped in fists, mind racing but not knowing what to think. only anger.

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I present to you - the marvel men of the month.

the fact that isaac lahey never came back is just borderline illegal