Whoops, I've Been Told That "it Is Not Abuse 'cause Is For Your Own Good", The Harm My Parents Did To

Circle the drain

— June Gehringer, ‘I get so jealous of euthanized dogs’ (via lunamonchtuna)

At least is my last try.

Hey, I'm here again¿ I'ven been sososo dead here I was in exams I had at leas 28373937 anxiety attacks:/ Y'all know what that means, right? BINGING:0000 I gained that three pounds I thought I lost last month I feel sooooo fucking bad, and it's not a joke, I thought about purging agAIN AND I DON'T PURGE SINCE JANUARY, I'M GOING FUCKING CRAZY ABOUT MY FUCKING WEIGHT. I tried, I swear I tried. I didn't notice when food became numbers, and I remember how time ago I read some tumblr post about whY DON'T TO RESTRICT FOODS AND ALL THAT SHIT THAT ALL ANA POST TELLS YOU and I said "nah, I'm not gonna be thaaat bad, right?" I feel bad, but I can't stop I'm empty. That's all, but next week or maybe tomorrow, depends on my mood. I'm gonna try to ristrict again, just to be calm. I'm sorry

Lola Lecomte, i miss her so much

nice personality. Who did u steal it from

Me: omG I LOST 3 POUNDS ;_;

My brain: great, next, die

My ed: hOLD A FUCKING SECOND, WHEN, WERE, HOW, WHO, WHAT¿ but you still fat gurl.

Me: -counting how much calories I ate last week and trying to anilize how I lost 3 pounds in a week after bingin' 2 times-

I want to be covered in bruises and scars

I want to look like the most damaged person you’ve ever fucking seen

THANK YOU, CLASSMATE WHO KNOWS MY TUMBLR, LOVE OF MY LIFE WHO TOLD YOU TO LAUGH OF MY DISTURBING SITUATION *Translation* Me: Man, I'm scared:(, Many porn-dating spam tumblr follow me:(. Some tumblrs are of anas, but aAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, I'm scared:( Classmate: *lAUGH ABOUT MY DISTURBING SITUATION* Me: DON'T LAUGH ABOUT MY MISFORTUNE SITUATIONS>:( Classmate: I'm sorry, I love you, but it maked me laugh I LOVE YOU BUT STOPPPP:(((((

Admitting you were abused is hard for whole multitude of reasons, but one that hit me most was the fact that I had to admit to myself that abusers have managed to really, really hurt me. Really badly. That all their efforts to get to me, to make me doubt myself, to make me hate myself, were successful, no matter how much I fought, and pretended not to be hit by it all. I didn’t manage to defend myself. I didn’t beat them. I got hurt. I couldn’t get out of there. I couldn’t get away from them. I continued to get hurt. For a long long time. I was at their mercy. They could have done anything to me. They did anything to me. Nobody stopped them. Nobody fought for me. Despite all my efforts to keep myself sane, to keep myself okay, I am filled with wounds and trauma and damage too vast to even asses. They got what they wanted. And I lost big parts of myself to it. I’ve been lying to myself when I tried to be okay. I wasn’t okay. I needed help. I wasn’t unbeatable. I wasn’t quite that strong. Humans aren’t made to be that strong. Humans aren’t made to survive in environment where they’re tortured and abandoned completely. I wasn’t made to withstand that either. I got broken. I lived in an illusion that this was okay. It wasn’t. I was scared. I was alone. I thought it was my fault. I could have died. It’s a miracle I’m still around.

self harming by trying to make your symptoms worse on purpose

i need to follow more ppl so pls reblog this if ur any of these:

- 160-168 cm tall

- sw was 60+ kg

- ur ugw is 50 kg or under

- you’re under 18

- you’re living with parents/roommates

it honestly doesn’t rly matter lol pls just reblog this if ur active