Bonus: Daisy Ridley:

Fair warning

I’m going to be salty as fuck about TROS for the foreseeable future (ever? Probably forever.) while still celebrating the beauty (and unnecessary painful tragedy) of Ben Solo A FUCKING LEGEND along with the beautiful love story about healing that Reylo COULD HAVE EASILY been.

I will cherry pick the shit out of the FEW “good” scenes in TROS but otherwise completely reject the narrative. I will NOT apologize for this offensive nightmare ending that destroyed the franchise.

If salt isn’t your brand of coping I can respect that and I’ll attempt to tag those posts “TROS salt”.

“when will it be perfect?”

I just really love them

I’m telling ya, we’re being trolled and trolled hard by a fandom troll. But everyone is inclined to their own beliefs.

“A bond between two living beings is not something easily broken. It is not a choice. . it is like breaking a feeling. Like turning away from the Force. To break a bond, your feelings would have to change, or one of you would have to die - but even then, the bond wouldn’t go away, it would simply. . it would simply be an empty wound.”

- Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords

I’m sorry, but to the person who said it’s apparently between “minor characters” - why would that be an experience? Why would that be special? And why would there be more than one? Especially since there’s already an established romance/storyline between Rey & Ben.

Me for the rest of the day

Idk if I’m taking it the wrong way but it bugs me how in the Prequels, Anakin’s love for his mother Shmi and his wife Padme are framed as his weakness and that his emotions are what drove him to the Dark Side when it was all just natural. They took little Anakin away from his mom and then shamed him for missing her and told him to “man up”, when he was concerned for her the Jedi told him to stop caring but he didn’t and he was right: his mom had been in danger. But his tears when she died are not him being sad that she died, but that he is “falling to the Dark Side”. As if grieving wasn’t appropriate and instead a sign of evilness.

And when pregnant Padme was dying in his dreams, Anakin wasn’t taken seriously by Yoda and told to just stop caring because “death is natural”. And what did we get? Padme did die in the end. There is a reason that he was trying to keep his love to her a secret and eventually turned to Palpatine: Because no one listened to him when he was expressing concern and emotions for his family members. Palpatine seemed to be the only one to care about his feelings and the only one to give him actual advice, but Anakin his still framed as the bad guy for listening to his feelings, especially his feelings towards women, as they are essentially “corrupting his pure mind and true self”. And I don’t care that this was some kind of shitty, self-fulfilling prophecy.

Luke is told similar stuff in the Originals: that he should shut off his emotions because they are “leading him to the Dark Side” or that he should “stop loving Leia” because the other (bad) men could see this as a weakness. Yet Yoda and the other Jedi are still framed as wise and right, while Anakin and Luke are supposed to come off as bratty and impulsive. Not to mention that fear alone doesn’t lead to hatred because experiencing fear is very much needed in a human’s life to prevent them from dangers. Especially fearing for your loved ones is not, as the Jedi put it, something bad that will turn you evil.

But still, it is shown that Luke being concerned and having intense emotions is what makes him fail his training and therefore something he should stop, to be “better”. But in the end, Luke successfully brings Vader back to the Light because he was thinking of him as a father in an emotional way and this is how he managed to reach out to that last spark of Anakin that was left in Vader.

Both Anakin and Luke are actually at their best when they are trying to save their friends and family, they are determined and compassionate, not evil, because they are right.

In the Sequels though, Ben Solo aka Kylo Ren is actually framed as good for staying to his true self and emotions in the end and his love for his parents and Rey is not something that corrupts him, but what brings him back to the Light in the end. (In addition, I wanted to mention that I firmly believe that Kylo Ren is a character who is coded as mentally ill). The good relationships with women in his life is what fuels his good side, not the other way around, like in the Prequels. Same with Luke at the end TLJ on Crait, where he is fueled by giving his sister hope.

 Especially in TFA, Kylo is constantly seen trying to put on an emotionless face and to deny his true feelings (”[Han] means nothing to me.”), which result in fits of rage because it is actually damaging him to mask his true self. We have seen Kylo/Ben at the end of TROS: the tantrum-throwing bad guy isn’t who he really is. He isn’t taken seriously by someone either, until Rey comes by and offers him support, what gives him hope and a reason to change. And regarding Kylo being a “crybaby who should man-up” - this is a dangerous thing to say as well. Kylo isn’t actually crying in the moments when he’s evil, but in the moments where he is allowing himself to feel his real emotions.

Take a look at the confrontation between him and Han in TFA for example: When Han approaches Kylo on the bridge, he is trying to talk him out of thinking that the “mighty Kylo Ren” whom Snoke apparantly values and teaches so well, is an illusion and that he didn’t destroy his son. Kylo still tries to be in his role until his true self breaks out: he starts crying and admits his true feelings (”I’m being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain!”). And we see that he actually is torn apart and thinking of going back to the Light side. But when he decides not to and commit the horrible act of killing his father instead, he stops crying and puts on an emotionless face,shutting off his true feelings once again, right in the moment where his father forgivingly strokes his cheek one last time.

And what happens? Kylo trying to cut off the bond with his father and telling himself to not feel a thing about the murder only results in backfiring, causing even more pain and confusion for Kylo and throwing him into an even bigger identity crisis. And he realizes that he cannot kill his mother and feels ashamed for what he has done to her life in TROS, believing that she will hate him, even if he comes back. He knew how bad his crimes were in the end.

But when he is vulnerable to Rey, actually crying out of compassion for her, he has a goal in life again: killing Snoke and starting a new order with Rey by his side. Not quite what is needed, but it is the next step in being himself again and valuing his actual wants again. No matter how much I hated how they trated the character in TROS, I will always cherish those 3 minutes of Ben Solo we got at the end.

At the end, Kylo/Ben was cherished for his true emotions and giving in to them, to his love and concern and having compassion and not to suppress his feelings because he was told that this was right. He wasn’t weak for crying, he was weak for thinking he shouldn’t.

Because this is actually a beautiful message that boys should keep in mind.

Telling boys and young men to be emotionless, to be careful with bonding with other people and staying to their true emotions on the other hand, is not a good message.

Also, for more information on this topic, watch “The Case Against The Jedi Order” by Pop Culture Detective on YouTube.

Thanks for coming to my pep talk

I needed to post something funny to help deal with the pain.