Enneagram Type Aesthetics (healthy)

Sometimes people will decide who you are.

It won't be based on truth. It'll be based on their perception of you.

No matter what you tell them, or how you explain the reasoning behind your actions, they have made up their minds.

Everything good that happens will because of your efforts, will be seen as things that happened despite of you.

People who defend you or stick up for you will be seen as having "a temporary lack of judgement".

For people with ADHD, this will happen more.

They'll call it lazy and unwilling.

Explanations will be called excuses.

They'll repeat the same advice. "Ask for help", even when you tell them you struggle with that.

They'll see your response caused by previous trauma as stubbornness. They'll think you think you know better, they'll think you ignore advice because you forgot.

Your efforts will not be seen.

They'll misinterpret your character.

And you'll be powerless.

I know all of you have experienced this. I know you read this and you can tell me exactly who it was and in what context. A teacher, an employer, a parent (although I really hope it wasn't a parent), maybe a former "friends", or a distant relative.

We all have that same story.

But we are not that person they think we are.

We are valid and true.

They can not decide our character.

They do not have the right. They do not deserve us. They're not worthy of your time, your efforts, your loyalty.

Hold on to that person that had your back.

They are worth it.

I took a test online once

To see if I was the Soldier

The Poet

Or the King

It told me I was the King

I always thought I’d be the poet

I think all kings long to be poets

In the same way that all eldest daughters long to just be children

Why bury your pain for the sake of others when you can turn it into art

Why raise children you didn’t make

But just like the test said

“The sword is at your side”

“It bore your name long before you did”

I never asked it to bear my name

I want to be free of it

But we all want what we are not meant to be

“You are tired of being steady. You dream of feeling alive. Not that you aren't, but, sometimes, it's hard to remember that there is a heart between your ribs.” -@atlanticsea

AJRs entire discography is just them being like “growing up was the worst thing i ever did” with a bunch of horn instruments and i eat it up

god. just… the change in 2085’s lyrics from “you’ve gotta get better, you’re all that i’ve got” to “i’ve gotta get better, i’m all that i’ve got”

When a person with ADHD complains of severe anxiety, I recommend that the clinician not immediately accept the patient’s label for her emotional experience. A clinician should say, “Tell me more about your baseless, apprehensive fear,” which is the definition of anxiety. More times than not, a person with ADHD hyperarousal will give a quizzical look and respond, “I never said I was afraid.” If the patient can drop the label long enough to describe what the feeling is like, a clinician will likely hear, “I am always tense; I can’t relax enough to sit and watch a movie or TV program. I always feel like I have to go do something.” The patients are describing the inner experience of hyperactivity when it is not being expressed physically.

At the same time, people with ADHD also have fears that are based on real events in their lives. People with ADHD nervous systems are consistently inconsistent. The person is never sure that her abilities and intellect will show up when they are needed. Not being able to measure up at the job or at school, or in social circles is humiliating. It is understandable that people with ADHD live with persistent fear. These fears are real, so they do not indicate an anxiety disorder.

holy SHIT

hi i was wondering if you had any skincare product reccomendations, i've never done skincare before and i don't really know where to start. i know i have sensitive and relatively dry skin.

i have a suncream that has spf 50+ which i think is good but do i need a specific one for my face? i apologise for all the questions but any advice would be amazing!

thank you!

💛

Hi darling!

Skincare is a tricky thing, because everybody's skin is different and as such has different needs. What works for one person may not work for another.

Firstly, you should start with my top skincare tips post so you understand the basics, function of ingredients, and which products are essential or not. You can also check out my skincare tag if you're interested in additional reading.

That being said, here are the basics from my routine and what currently works for me:

Morning routine:

Vitamin C serum: La Roche Posay - Vit C10 This helps brighten complexion, softens skin and helps to fade any blemishes, scars, etc. Pro tip: keep your Vit C serum in the fridge, Vit C tends to oxidize and turn orange with time, even if i doesn't affect its efficiency.

Sunscreen: La Roche Posay - Anthelios for Face SPF50 This is what I've been using for 2 years now, it's popular for good reason. Although I will say they recently changed the formula from completely dry to a little oily, and I prefer the former.

Night routine:

Cleanser: CeraVe - SA Smoothing Cleanser This is a chemical exfoliant (with Salicylic Acid) which is great for acne or break-out prone skin, to be used 2-3 times a week. For daily use I recommend CeraVe's classic cleanser, the Hydrating Cleanser.

Moisturizer: Bioderma - Hydrabio Riche Gentle, moisturizing, rich but not greasy. I always go back to this. (It's for dry skin, but if other readers have oily skin, try the Hydrabio Legere version instead.)

Skin-barrier repair (optional): La Roche Posay - Cicaplast Baume B5 This is a holy grail if you have damaged skin from using too many products, exfoliants, sunburn, etc. It's very gentle and soothing, and really does improve skin overnight. You can use it for face, body, even lips, but for that I prefer the product below.

Skin-barrier repair for lips (optional): La Roche Posay - Cicaplast Baume for Lips This is my go-to for intense hydration and repair (ie. chapped lips, wore drying lipstick all day, etc). Leave it on overnight and you'll wake up with smooth, plush lips ready for the day.

Retinol: The Ordinary - Retinol 0.2% in Squalane, CeraVe - Resurfacing Retinol Serum, La Roche Posay - Effaclar Adapalene 0.1% Topical Retinoid Retinol essentially regenerates your skin, helps with fine lines, wrinkles, scarring, etc. I'm still looking for the best retinol product, but I would recommend either of the above, all of which are direct recommendations I've found by dermatologists via Youtube or IG.

Conclusions

The only essentials you need are: cleanser, sunscreen, moisturizer. Everything else helps, but isn't necessary.

If you choose to add new products to your skincare routine, always add 1 at a time. That way you'll know which one is or isn't working for you.

Create the skincare routine that works for you. Don't go running after trends and trying out a hundred different things. Only test 1 product at a time, and when something works for you, keep it in your routine.

If you can afford it, reach out to a dermatologist to recommend products that are tailored to your needs. Most of the products listed were recommended by my dermatologist for mine.

If that's not an option currently, start following board-certified dermatologists on social media instead of taking advice from random people online as fact. You'll learn so much from their tips, plus it's free! I like watching Dr. Dre and Shereene Idriss, they are both entertaining and educational.

Hope this proves helpful, and let me know how your routine comes together. 💜

-Lumen

ADHD Ask!

1.When were you diagnosed?

2.What type do you have? (Hyperactive, Inattentive, Combination)

3.Do you stim?

4.What is your favorite stim toy?

5.Looking back what behaviors did you do that you now realize are ADHD related that no one noticed?

6.Did you ever receive special education services because of your ADHD?

7.What are the positive qualities you have associated with ADHD?

8.What techniques help you cope with your ADHD?

9.Do you have any comorbid diagnoses?

10.What sensory things do you love?

11.What sensory things do you hate?

12.What is your experience with RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria)?

13.What part of ADHD do you struggle with most?

14.What part of ADHD have you learned to love?

hi i brought some memes based on fourth wing

and i also created a playlist:

upd: i don't know what the problem is with the playlist showing, i'll try to fix it

infp: When cats sleep all day they’re cute

infp: But when I do it I’m ‘clinically depressed’ and 'need to get help’

What do you mean “like a head type”? Is there some tell tale signs that someone is heart/head/gut type in general? And by that i don’t mean the whole what is more important to you, anger shame anxiety thing

Guts are action oriented. They react immediately and viscerally (even 9s, who know immediately to withdraw. They have their tactics to get away and they use them as immediately as 8s or 1s) Guts are decisive in the moment.

Guts have had a certain peace and serenity ripped from them as children, which is why they act this way

Hearts are identity oriented. They reflect and then act according to their personal identity (even 3s, similar to 9s)

Hearts have a certainty in who they are ripped from them as children (by criticism or praise), which is why they want to act according to the identity.

Heads take longer to react. They think through what is happening and react in a “logical” (can be genuinely logical or illogical) way that will keep them safe in the future. Even 7s do this by running from the issue

Heads have inner guidance that has been taken away from them. They don’t know what the right course of action is as well as other types, which is why they act this way