Islandgrlj

I don't know what, why, how..... I can't help it. Maybe it's my hormones because I'm getting older. Maybe it's a defense mechanism. Maybe I'm completely sex crazed. A nymphomaniac. I'm not sure. What I *do* know, however, is that I'm always always thinking about sex. Ahhhh but, you see.... Not just any sex. Specifically, I'm always thinking about my husband and another woman. Think of him with several different women ( I do have my favorites and those thoughts make me cum a bit more hard than others.....) ... I think of everything he loves and enjoys doing sexually and getting those needs fulfilled elsewhere. Even just writing this has my pussy soaking wet and absolutely throbbing with anticipation. I could be in any kind of mood. Any time. Any where. With anyone.... And my thoughts shift to him giving and/or receiving pleasure from someone else. I don't care if I've been sobbing my eyes out for days... It doesn't matter..... Leave it be and the thoughts creep in. In fact, I literally cannot cum without thinking about him and usually the orgasms are more intense when these thoughts involve another woman.

The thing is... I know he wants it too. I just know how much he loves pussy. Loves getting his dick sucked. All different women, different looks.sizes, etc.... And he fucking deserves it. 100% this man should have whoever the fuck he wants with absolutely no regard to whether I'd approve of the person or not. I mean who tf am I to stop his ultimate pleasure? The one and only thing I ask is that he tells me about it. That's the only thing the only stipulation between him and his ultimate sexual freedom.. I don't think it's too much to ask. And he can even get the rush or cheating if he gets that pussy first and then tells me that night. I don't care.

I've asked him many times to come clean about the cheating in the past before we were so far into this lifestyle. I found something out the other day.... I won't go into details but I just wanted to say.... Im already to the point where I'm over most of the emotional aspect and on to the sexy part.... As in... I've masurbated thinkin about the situation. I had one of the most intense orgasms of my entire life. If that doesn't show my loyalty to this lifestyle... What can????

I'd love nothing more than a tell-all. Maybe one cheating story a night until he's told them all. I need them in my memory to masturbate to. I'd do absolutely anything for this.

This is legitimately my source of ultimate pleasure and happiness. It's all I think about. I crave it in the worst way.. this is pure, animalistic love at it's core. Blessed.

Radical idea

I get off on thinking of us in a really animalistic way. He’s this alpha, incredibly sexy man, the king of our pride of lions or whatever. 

I’m his queen, his primary. I’m his life partner. 

The others? well here’s what I’ve been thinking as of lately.. Initially I only wanted them to be of the most minor significance in his life, one night stands, casual hook ups, nothing important. but now?

I am comfortable with him having varying levels of emotional attachment to these women and them to him, if, and only if he makes sure I still feel like the queen. 

I need to hear him tell me how important I am to him. How I am his number one. How no matter how hot, sexy, tight, incredible, kind, fun, these women are, he would drop any of them like a hot potato if I so much felt uncomfortable. I want him to remind me that I am the one who owns his heart. I am the one the quietly holds the power.  At the end of the day I’m the girl he brought home to his family. The one that takes care of him and supports him. If it weren’t for me he would not have been able to explore this side of himself. I want him to tell me he’s as in love with me today as he was all those years ago. That living without me is not an option. That he daydreams of our future. That we are going to be together forever. I want him to look me in the eyes and tell me that NO ONE will ever come between us. 

and if he does all that… I’m not too concerned about how many hearts he sends her, or the occasional sleep over. 

I need his words. 

as it should be