Dawn Outbreak

being spoiled is always my way 🎀💋

slap in your face and mine

hi lovers, night out from a depressed girl but who has a big girl self-concept (me rs). I just wanted to write what came to mind and I wrote it anyway. I hope this reaches anyone who needs it.

probably gonna get my period, felt a damn anguish for hours tonight. now in the wee hours I pulled some cards (lenormand deck) about some people and they weren't so good (well, there are reasons). opened my TikTok and my FYP showed a sad trend and I broke down, cried and cried. cried for fear of losing friendships, cried for feeling alone (even though I'm not???), cried for accumulated fears and the most terrible cried for love (but not for a bad love). I cried so much and felt an immeasurable pain, bet it's those damn hormones. it's been a while since I cried so I allowed myself, I was feeling so weak and powerless, like I deserved to suffer

¿hi???????? do I deserve to suffer??????????? NEVER, never again.

just remember i kept creating more depreciative scenarios in my head and out of nowhere in a burst of hope (because despite everything my self-concept is still good) and finally i became aware of who i am. i'm freaking god of my reality, i control everything down to the smallest things, i'm not a person who deserves to suffer even the slightest bit. obviously not. i'm not going through that.

and neither are you, because surely you've been in the same state as i was before feeling sad, feeling hopeless, feeling like you have no power to change things, just have to feel and accept. NOOOOOOOO ok i said NO. you're not going to accept this, you're not going to accept life beating you down more.

what i do when i have these bouts of sadness (because i'm still melancholic) is affirm like crazy. i start affirming things that will reassure me and even mock my situation (this helps me). what i said at the time was something like:

"wait, am i suffering because of this? am i really here crying like a baby over a situation that i can step into the void and change? or that i can solve with affirmations, whatever. the point is, why am i suffering here? why am i losing control for what reason? if i'm ALWAYS in charge, if EVERYTHING IS A REFLECTION OF MY MIND. if i want something, i can simply have it???? how many PERFECT AND WONDERFUL things have i achieved so far, i can get everything i want and change whatever i want."

as i kept talking to myself, my good conscience returned and i started thinking "yeah, you're right, it doesn't make sense."of course after that, i said good things to myself, things to calm my inner child, because the reason i'm feeling so bad is because i triggered one of her traumas (a trauma i'll resolve in the future).

moments of hopelessness and despair are completely normal, my loves, please don't let it consume you. you have everything to change in your hands. freaking out and saying "omg what do i do? it's all lost." doesn't make sense, wake up, realize your freaking power, don't disgrace the god that you are.

if you really don't know how to get what you want, go back to basics, there are plenty of people here teaching and preaching their words, take the information and put it into practice. if despair comes, cry and let out what you feel, but make sure to REMEMBER who you are afterwards.

anyway my loves, that's it, felt like posting this here. I'm not going to review this, I'm going to smoke and go to sleep. So forgive me if there are mistakes. I don't want to read this text anymore

Saint i have been thinking about moving from the ND (Non Dualism) community and move to the LOA (personal reasons) what do you think about this? And where can i study about loa?

complicated question to ask me, I don't think I'm the most qualified person to answer that clearly lol. before my success, I was one of those people who consumed WAY too much about loa😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫, so I can't say where there's a super summarized post (but very well explained) clearing up all doubts about LOA. (because honestly I don't look much about it lately)

you can search for LOA here on Tumblr, there are many super informative posts that are easy to understand and apply. I follow a lot of lovely people who explain it perfectly, i can recommend some blogs that I love if anyone wants!!!! or you can search on YouTube too, Electrasoul's channel was my biggest guide on this journey. I love this woman, I consider her my mom, she explains things and gives you a lot of motivation. but it's important to be careful not to consume too much!!

In most of my posts, I always leave some steps on how to manifest your desires into reality, but I understand that they're far from being a step-by-step tutorial for people who know nothing about loa... If you want, I can make one, about everything I know in the clearest way possible (it might help someone else who needs it) or I can look here for some posts that I think are comprehensive.

regarding the question about ND, I studied a bit, found it quite coherent but never delved into it (to be honest, it gave me a bit of an existential crisis ¿). obviously, I support you. LOA is everything to me and will definitely help you, my love.

(why did I repeat the word 'loa' so many times? It's giving me the creeps ewww)

sometimes all you need is to take a break from Tumblr loa for a while.

sometimes you just need to trust yourself and realize that you already have the information you need.

sometimes you just need to go back to the basics of manifestation, which is choosing what you want and believing that it will eventually come into 3D reality.

I know it may seem like if you don't read a success story or a motivational post, you won't feel capable. but motivation fades quickly, you have to self-discipline yourself.

and sometimes you just need a break to not mess up your mental health because of manifestations. 😵‍💫😵‍💫🤕

reminder 🎀

You're going to be okay. Blessings are coming your way. You are important. You matter. You are loved.

i'm obsessed

straight-a semester 🧠✏️🎒💗

face pretty but soul prettier.