New Release: Neo Ludwig 【-Flying Through The End Of Time-】 Ouji Lolita Blouse And Trousers

She, she, she comes over me I knew half as much as she does She wants to be, my anything, my everything Really who am I to judge, to judge, to JUDGE?

there's a lot to say about this piece. i'll try to keep it short. i started it back in december, i think? and have been working on it bit by bit since then. it originally started off as a vent piece. it still is, sort of. i think. but the emotions are all over the place. as have i been these past few months. i had a hard time picking out a caption too, since my ideas for that have changed many times.

something about wanting to be pure. but knowing youre not, no matter how hard you try. youre tainted somehow, even if you cant see it. poor thing. youll never be free.

anyways, the feathers werent done by hand. i used a brush i found on clip studio, it's titled "天使の翼ブラシセット" i think. it feels like cheating to use it tbh... but it really brought the piece together so. whatever, we all know im not a real artist anyways lol.

below are two other versions of the art. the flat colors and a version similar to the final one but without the feathers brush. enjoy.

the most #UselessLesbian thing i have ever done was when i was trying to figure out if this girl liked me or not, just constantly arguing with myself about it, and after a couple, uh, months, of this, i was like, “god i wish i could just like… go to court and lay out all this evidence and have a couple lawyers argue over the TRUE MEANING of her text messages, and then a judge tells me if she likes me or not.” and then the proverbial lightbulb went off over my proverbial head, and i dug into my mock trial folder from high school and found the trial guidelines and i wrote out an entire trial transcript featuring a plaintiff (me), my attorney (my wildest hopes and dreams), a defense attorney (my worst fears and insecurities), and a judge (my desperate attempt at rationality). the final product was several thousand words long. it clarified nothing. at any point in this process did it occur to me to ask her how she felt about me? absolutely not. did i ever stop and think, “hey, maybe i should tell her that i like her?” absolutely not. that’s for people who take risks and i don’t take risks i take myself to court in my own head.

if it sucks hit da bricks <- litany against sunk cost

take it easy but take it <- litany against burnout/apathy cycle

fuck it we ball <- litany against perfectionism

now say something beautiful and true <- litany against irony poisoning

live laugh love trephacard

but she has a job to do

hi i just created an excel sheet where i can pick a meal and have it autopopulate the ingredients i'll need as a shopping list

i have never felt so smart

bounty hunter

vampire hunter? no i said vampire HAUNTER. this jerk sucked all my blood out so now i spend my afterlife knocking over shelves and scaring off potential victims and just making the castle generally pretty cold