"Self Insert Characters Are Cringe"

Are you alive

Don’t ask me no personal shit like this

my bf has many interesting stories and observations from his new job as a 911 operator

my favorite is how meandering people are, even in the midst of a terrible emergency

they respond to “what is the emergency” with “well, the thing is, four weeks ago–”

and then he’s like “WHAT IS THE EMERGENCY RIGHT NOW”

and they’re like “so what happened this morning was, i said to my wife, i said–”

“WHAT IS CURRENTLY HAPPENING AT THIS MOMENT”

“oh i’m having a heart attack”

my second favorite is how specific he has to get sometimes

like, “what is your emergency?”

“i’m sitting in a pool of blood.”

“… is it… your blood?”

“yes i think so”

“do you know where it’s coming from?”

“probably the stab wound”

“have you been stabbed?”

“oh yah definitely”

i’m lmfao at this shit

Silly doodle bc it was the first thing I thought of when I saw Pomni.

haymitch says himself katniss is like him, but luckier.

katniss realized the berries were nightlock before peeta ate them.

sorry for acting batshit crazy I was feeling a little unwanted

Things that ARE covered by your Wizard Insurance:

Top Surgery

Bottom Surgery

Witch Encounters (one per century)

Killed By Greg

Middle Surgery (✨ New! ✨)