Eric: I Love To Call People's Opinion Of Me "fan Theories"

Rachel: Is that a hickey?

Jason: No, It's a mosquito bite.

Salim, walks in: Hello, good morning.

Rachel: Hey, mosquito.

Nick: You tried to join the freemasons???

Eric: No, I just looked into it!

weewoo

Jason: Salim is the kind of person that makes everyone think about them all the time, even when you’re asleep, right?

Rachel: I don’t think of Salim all the time

Eric: I don’t dream about Lieutenant Othman

Nick: When you say everyone, do you mean yourself?

Jason: why do the vampires keep trying to kill us?

Salim: maybe they’re homophobic 

Jason: we’re not gay, Salim

Salim: we're not???

Jason: But Chernobyl's so silly!

Nick: You can't say that, you're Russian!!!

Salim: Jason, can you do me a favour ?

Jason: i would literally cover up a murder you committed, plant my dna at the crime scene and take the blame for you.

Salim: cool i guess ? can you do the dishes please ?

Jason: no.

Jason: You know they kicked Robin Williams out of Juilliard?

Nick: Really? Oh, man, what'd he play?

Jason: No, don't-!

Nick: JASON LISTENS TO WHITE GIRL MUSIC!!

Rachel: What?

Joey: Lmao why??

Jason: BRITNEY SPEARS DIED FOR OUR SINS, OKAY??

Jason: ARE YOU-

Rachel: Fucking.

Jason: KIDDING ME? YOU-

Rachel: Fucking.

Jason: IDIOT!

Nick: What was that?

Rachel: Salim bet Jason couldn't stop swearing for a week, so I’m helping him out.