My School Was On Lockdown Today And This Happend

The story of the Australian white ibis is hysterical in many ways.

These birds are native to Australia, yes, but they're not technically native to the cities. Or, well, kinda?

So, Australian ibises typically lived in inland wetland areas. Australia, however, is a dry-ass continent, and the swamps aren't always wet, so whenever there's a dry spell and the swamps dry up and the food dwindles, the ibis colonies will migrate to the coast for food. I suppose when their presence caused enough competition with existing coastal birds they'd fly back inland and hopefully the wetlands would be wet again.

Enter the Europeans - the ibis didn't have much contact with the white man for a hundred years or so, wetlands were too annoying to actively clear, so the white man mostly stayed out and the ibis generally doesn't leave while there's food. Or maybe they did, and the white man towns were too tiny to register for them and they just did their usual thing.

Come the 1970s, severe drought conditions once again led to ibises to flee the wetlands (and the wetlands were probably extra hurt and extra unable to recover due to water diversion for agriculture).

They went for the coasts, and there, due to the absolutely boom in Australian urban sprawl, they found....

Huh. That's new. But was there food?

The answer was yes there was, and not only that, it was almost like the food set out specifically for them!

I am of course talking about bins.

Bins have a couple of nifty features if you're an ibis. One, they contain food scraps, especially protein scraps. Two, the openings tend to be fairly far off the ground, so rats and other flightless creatures can't get to the food (the cockroaches can, which is a plus for the ibis because they eat bugs!)

Two, the bottoms are low, and ibises are wading birds so they have long legs and long beaks. Seagulls, crows and pigeons all have to wait for the bin to be fairly full - ibises can get in there at half full!

And three, natural environment for the ibis is diving into a fetid stagnant swamp with nasty bacteria to eat wriggling things. Their beaks and heads are specially adapted for that - they're bald, and the skin is specially adapted for diving into gross places. Their beaks are sharp and dextrous, so they can open packaging or simply pierce it to get at the tasty, tasty leftover fried chicken or whatever. And if the chicken's already got maggots? Fantastic, they love eating bugs.

So they don't wanna go back. Why the hell would they go back? And with every new drought, even more ibis leave the drying wetlands, find the cities, and decide to stay.

I mean, there's probably a selection effect - the birds that are scared of humans eventually return to their home wetlands, but the ones that aren't decide they're just gonna start nesting in the urban parks. Wetlands are also getting drier and drier (water use issues) so the wetland populations are crashing while the urban populations are exploding.

I think, the bin chicken has to be a symbol of luck. It is so insane to me that the human-designed environment ended up being an ibis paradise, where we've systematically murdered all their enemies and established abundant self-replenishing food sources that they and only them can access.

May you be as lucky as the Australian white ibis. May you leave your normal life for foreign shores and face not the expected adversity, but instead abundance and safety beyond your wildest dreams.

I just love the "they're more scared of you than you are of them" thing because, yeah, Earth is a Deathworld filled with very dangerous beings, but also everyone in it is scared and would rather not interact with each other unless necessary

Alien: This is a very dangerous animal!

Human: Don't worry, we'll just walk away.

Alien: But it's watching us!

Human: It's hoping we leave already, so we're leaving.

Alien: It... It is?

Human: Yeah, it is more scared of us than we are of it. Let's go before the fight instinct kicks in because then it'll become a dangerous animal

Alien:...

I've been slowly dragged back into the Naruto fandom, but I'm on ao3 this time. I was a 6th grade writer on wattpad the last time I was in the fandom..... I think you can imagine what I read and wrote.

it just now dawned on me that all Those Windows in the mystery shack are not some clever background design choices, or funny haha easter eggs, or visual puns, or chekhov's guns

that is a house Ford in-universe canonically built with his own hands.

he. he made those.

ITS ALIVE

Is anyone else's AO3 down it won't load and @ao3org hasn't posted anything today..... I was mid fic

was talking to my monsterfucking friends about tma characters and one of them said pass to jane prentiss?? like im sorry how can you call yourself a monsterfucker and you wouldn't even smash jane prentiss??????? literally level 1 fuckable monster she's a bunch of worms in a sexy human suit and her whole thing is she'll fuck you and now you have worms in you but like. your're not upset about it! bc now you're a bunch of worms in a sexy human suit! you literally join the hive like wtf fake monsterfucker behaviour

anyway reblog if you'd smash jane prentiss <3

What school did you go to it's 7 to 3 for me then I have a 4-5 hour work shift or volunteering after?

So, time in the Infinite Realms is pretty warped. Some places it moves faster, some places it moves slower.

This is pretty convenient for Danny.

This is pretty confusing for the other heroes.

Danny, leaving in a portal: Alright everybody I got some ghost king paperwork to deal with I’ll be back in a sec

Heroes, doing their business: aight

Danny: Hey I’m back! Gosh paperwork is so annoying to deal with..

Heroes: ??

*Danny has an argument with Jazz or smby idk*

Danny, storming off: Don’t try summoning me!

Heroes: you two need to work it out

Jazz: Yeah we should. I’ll apologize when he gets back.

Danny: Hey guys I’m back! Sorry about that I was pretty upset but I’ve cooled down now.

Heroes: ???

Jazz: No worries! I’m sorry too.

Heroes: ????

Or: everybody consecutively forgot to explain the time warping to them. They’ll figure it out. Eventually.

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you're welcome