“IT’S A SWORD, IT’S NOT MEANT TO BE SAFE.” My Favourite Scene From The Hogfather. ___ See How

clone wars writers: We're gonna create a new series to explore Anakins arc more and make his fall more understandable. We will also explore the Jedis culture before the Empire. You'll have Obi-Wan, Anakin, Ahsoka and many more amazing Jedi to show you this era of the universe :)

literally all of us: clones, clones, clones, clones clones clones clones clonesclonesclonesclonesclonesclo-

That’s the origin, now what does it mean?

what exactly is a xljninolaigho?

I had to look that fucking shit up only to realize it was a made-up word I made 3 fucking years ago. You lunatic

Narrating people's lives on Cybertron with Bumblebee (take place after Season 4)

Bumblebee: Story time! *approach Grimlock and Arcee* The mech came to Maccadam's everyday to pick up hot chick.

Grimlock: *glances at Arcee and gives a thumb up and smirking*

Bumblebee & Arcee: *laughs*

-w-

Bumblebee: Story time! *approach Jetfire and Sky Byte* These two were models and they loved to strike their stuff.

-both Jetfire and Sky Byte strike the most dramatic poses-

Bumblebee: *laughing*

-w-

Bumblebee: Story time! *approaching Dead End but he got up and start to run off* A young mech sat down, drinking his mid-grade...

Dead End: *began to run away* Leave me alone. Leave me alone!

Bumblebee: I'm a Primus! YOU ABANDONED MY WILL

-w-

Bumblebee: Story time! *approached some random Decepticons and Autobots citizens* One of these mechs forgot to check their flies.

-they all looked at each other-

Bumblebee: That mech was me. These four are fine.

Them: *grinning and points at Bumblebee* Ha!

-w-

Bumblebee: Story time! *approached the Dinobots* In every group of friends, there's the dumb one.

-everyone pointed at Sludge-

Sludge: Really?

Everyone: *laughs*

-w-

Bumblebee: Story time! *approaching Shadow Striker who is walking right pass him* Here she comes the queen. Able to kill the mechs with a single stare.

Shadow Striker: *smirking* You better watch out then.

Bumblebee: *laughing*

-w-

Bumblebee: Story time! *approaching Windblade* Of all the works in this room, she was the loveliest.

Windblade: *smiling and chuckling*

-w-

Bumblebee: Story time! *running towards random Autobot who is also running* No matter how fast he ran, he could not escape the demons! But he will not let his soul be taken today!

Random Autobot: *screaming and flailing his arms around*

YES

But honestly, the Empire would've had such a problem if the running time of the inhibitor chip had been limited. I mean, there was an entire clone army within the Empire lmao who thought this was a good idea, just imagine:

Whoops, Lama Su forgot to tell that the chips only work for a couple of years after being activated

One day, the Empire has thousands of happily programmed clone troopers

Next day, the Empire has thousands of very depressed and highly skilled clone troopers who legitimately have zero fucks to give

It takes a while but our boys slowly come back together, realizing that they're not alone and that the Empire doesn't have a clue

(a super secret boy band army)

So, naturally, the only option for them is to totally wreak havoc

Cody deletes all the important files he has access to. Bly writes Kick me on the back of the stormtroopers' armor. Boil sets random bunks on fire. Wooley changes the stormtroopers' comlink receiving frequency, so no one gets an order, everyone listens to soup opera

Like, even the most simple standard procedures become a failure and the Empire has no idea why

Sometimes, the stormtrooper unit for a mission consists only out of clones. Oh dear, oh no, did the rebel just escape? dAmMiT

(it was Rex who totally hugged the hell out of Cody)

Mhh weird somehow explosives disappear from the armory now who could that be

Before Palestine even understands what's going on the Death Star is already exploding, as well as most of the cruisers of his fleet

(our boys are long gone, heading for a deserted planet and are probably about to open a bar)

All I'm saying is that the moment the clones had regained their free will the Empire would've survived for approximately 0.2 seconds before being greatly fucked. Thanks for coming to my ted talk

*opens my laptop and cracks my knuckles*……..*takes a shot*……….*stares really intensly at my blank word document*……..this is about to be the shittiest most unprofound essay my professor has ever seen

Who's the 'little brother' out of you five?

Swoop: Him, Grimlock mean that us Swoop and Snarl created second! So us little brothers.

OOC: I will be updating regularly from this point on!

Okay fuck canon, here’s how the Clone Wars really ended:

• Anakin doesn’t magically lose his mind and ignore the red flags that Palpatine is throwing up constantly. He’s the most force sensitive person in the galaxy, right? Okay, so that shriveled prune has no chance to turn him to the dark side bc Anakin sees it coming from a mile away.

• Anakin believes Fives about the inhibitor chips. He takes it to the republic, and one way or another, Palpatine is outted (after all the chips are discreetly removed so he can’t just call Order 66 before he’s arrested)

• The Jedi Council (aka the most poweful force users in all of the universe) come together and either take Palpatine into unbreachable, indefinite captivity, outright kill him or (my favorite option) use the Light wall ability to sever his ties from the force forever (it’s a thing that has been done before, and it’s super fuckin cool, google it my dood)

• Anakin leaves the order. After Palpatine is taken care of, he takes off with Padme and they live together on Naboo and have their kids and it’s the life that both of them deserve

• Padme, the absolute sweetheart of the republic, convinces the government to allow the Clones to settle on planets of their choosing. Through her ties on Naboo, she’s even able to offer a good number of them a new home there. Anakin is all for it. The 501st move in essentially next door and it’s a grand time.

• The republic also quickly firgures out how to reverse the whole accelerated aging thing, either by forcing the Kaminoans to reveal their secrets or by employing a team of scientists to figure it out on their own. Ultimately, our boys get to live a natural life span.

• Kix is never frozen so he gets to stay with his dudes in that time period

• Hardcase doesn’t die in this au either, because fuck Pong Krell and that whole Umbaran debaucle

• Fives lives, fuck yeah

• Ahsoka is never framed and she stays with the order until Anakin leaves, and then she leaves as well but they keep in touch (meaning she visits constantly)

• Cody gets a high-level job in the government on Coruscant, probably as a Clone ambassador or something, and he and Obi-Wan pal around together a lot. They also visit Naboo frequently to see their buddies.

• Rex and the rest of the 501st build a little compound on Naboo and they get jobs and stuff. The first boss to try to take advantage of any of them (like that one guy did Gregor) has to deal with an outraged war hero banging down their door because Anakin Skywalker will not sit by and let his family be treated that way.

• Luke and Leia are born into a loving family, and they have like 20 uncles that all look alike and would die for their little munchkins (Padme and Anakin never have to worry about finding a babysitter between the Clones and Ahsoka)

• The clones start settling down with partners. They get the endings they deserve too, with families and normal lives.

• When Luke and Leia are older they are given the choice to learn the force. Their dad helps them, and Obi-wan gets involved too. Leia still becomes a politician and leader like her mother, but she also learns the force. Anakin just doesn’t want them to feel like they have to join the order and give up having families just because they’re force sensitive.

• In the end, they all live good, peaceful lives.

Guys I wanna start something...

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Which Battalion/Legion Are You A Part Of?

Are you a part of the Wolfpack?

Are you a part of the literal droid-kicking battalion?

Are you a part of the chaotic yet quick-thinking legion?

327th CG Bad Batch version

In this House, love and respect Cody and Rex, we do

In this house we love and respect Cody and Rex