Gerard you have our permission to write FAG on the drum set
gays ruined the word hole for eternity
Summary: Grief hits at the most random of times and Jake just needs a little comfort.
Characters: Jake Kiszka x Fem!reader
Warnings: 18+ || Angst. Grief. Crying. Mentions of passed loved one. Fluff. Kissing. Cuddling. (no editing, apologies for any mistakes)
A/N: I wrote this on the anniversary of a couple friends' passing and I just needed to write it out. But to whoever reads this and you may be in the same shoes, I want you to know that grieving is okay and healthy (though it may seem the opposite), and you when you think you have no one to run to, just know that I am here, and you will always have someone to turn to. 🤍
A/N 2: I don't normally do tags for blurbs, so if you see it, you see it 😉
Usually hearing from Jake around this time when he gets home from work, you found it odd when a text never came through. Or even a phone call. So you thought you’d reach yourself. But when your texts go unanswered and your phone calls are sent to his voice message box, you gather up your things and get in your car and drive off to his house.
His car sits in the driveway and you can see the lights are all off in the house. Climbing out of your car, you walk up to the front door and try to twist the knob, only to find it locked. Picking through the few keys on your ring, you find his key and slowly unlock the door before letting yourself in. It was eerily quiet, something that was unusual for him. At the very least he’d have some kind of music playing but there was nothing but silence.
Slipping off your shoes and setting your things on the foyer table, you climb the stairs to the second floor and trudge down the hallway to his bedroom. The door is slightly cracked open and you peer inside to see the form of his body curled up on the bed with the covers drawn over him completely.
Padding quietly over to the bed, you gently sit down by his feet and rest your hand on where his ankle is resting. “Jake?” You only grunt and grumble before he twists his body and pulls his ankle away from you.
“Jake..” You crawl across the bed and sit on the side of him. “Do you want to talk about it?” You can see the blanket move as he shakes his head, followed by a sniffle. “Okay..” I breathe as you shift your body to lay down beside him.
You hadn't realized you had fallen asleep until you woke up finding Jake curled around your body. You can tell that he’s awake when you feel his chest shake as he sniffles, trying to fight off the urge to cry. Turning over to face him, you look up at him and he’s already looking down at you. You give him a small smile as you rest your hand on his cheek. His chin quivers and his eyes gloss over with tears.
“You’re okay..” You whisper.
He shakes his head and you immediately pull him into you as he starts to cry. You still didn't know what was going on or what even happened to prompt this but all that you did know was that he needed comfort and you’d be happy to provide it.
“Just having one of those days?” You ask. You feel him nod his head and you rest your hand against his hair and lightly stroke your fingers through his locks. “I love you..” He didn't answer with any words, just simply squeezed you tighter and kissed your shoulder.
Soon he pulls away and rests against the pillows, his eyes focused on the ceiling. “I was doing fine.. And then something happened that reminded me of him and then it all came crashing back. I’ve been doing okay, or so I thought I was..”
“It’s okay when grief comes and goes. Grief never truly goes away, Jake, but that’s what makes us human–as sucky as that sounds.. It’s still new to you, but eventually it won't hurt as much as time goes on. You’ll be able to see things that remind you of him and instead of feeling heavy, you’ll smile.”
“I just wish it never happened, you know?”
“Oh I know,” You say as you reach your hand over to brush your thumb over his cheek. “There’s a lot of things we wish never happened, but we're only human, we can’t control everything.”
“I don't know what I would do without you,” He says as he turns his head to look at you. “How did you even know to come here?”
“You didn't call or text me like you normally do when you get home from work..”
He smiles, a light chuckle escaping him. “I guess I didn't want to drag you down with me..”
“You can always do that, Jake,” You say as you lean down to kiss his cheek. “You know that I would drop everything to help out.”
“I know you would,” He says. “And that’s what I love about you.”
“That can't be the only thing,” You say, playfully rolling your eyes.
“Did you just roll your eyes at me?”
“Only because you were speaking so absurdly.”
“There's a lot I love about you.” He says as rolls on top of you, his body weight pinning you to the bed. “I love how kind you are,” He says, kissing you. “I love how snarky you can be,” You giggle and he laughs. “I love how you stay by my side even when I don’t want anyone around. I don’t know what I do without you, because you are my person, my best friend, and overall the love of my life. I don't know if I say it often but I’ll try to because I do love you. I’ve lost enough people and I’ve realized that I never told them how often I loved them, but I won't let that happen with you.”
“Whenever you need someone, let it be me.”
He smiles and kisses you again. “And if you're not available?”
“I will always make myself available for you. Through hell or high waters, I will come to you. Even if you just need me to hold your hand, I will be there to do it.” You run a hand through his hair, pushing it away from his face and tucking it behind his ear. “Are you busy the rest of the day?” When he shakes his head, you smile. “Want to have a movie marathon?”
“Which movies?”
“Anything you want to watch,” You say. “Even if it’s Lord of The Rings.”
Jake smiles and rolls off you before reaching over to the nightstand and grabbing the remote. He hands it to you before snuggling up against you and resting his head on your shoulder. “You pick,” He says. He drapes his arm over your waist and pushes even closer to your body. “I just want to be here with you.”
Real I fear
Guys what the fuck I don't know why I am feeling baby fever right now I'm literally a lesbian but I can't stop thinking about dad danny and this song 😭
I imagine him sitting on the couch playing guitar while you're in your rocking chair with the baby and he plays super quietly so it doesn't upset them. You softly sing along as he plays, looking down at your child all peaceful and sleepy in your arms. You look up at him for a moment, the realization setting in that you two created that soul together, and its just such a beautiful moment of connection. You feel yourself tear up, and you see him start to as well. You smile at eachother, before looking back down at the perfect little angel in your arms and everything starts to make sense.
Is that too much to ask for? (The answer is yes definitely 😭)
Josh Kiszka x GN reader
so I've been thinking about Siren Josh quite a bit so here's a little like ficlet of that :3
Word Count: 956
~
The sun is slowly setting on the horizon, disappearing behind the water. Water is all you can see, in any direction. You are a merchant, far out on a wooden raft, you have crates with enough food and water to hopefully get you through till you arrive in England. Most importantly though, is the boxes upon boxes of jewels. Diamonds and rubies, pretty necklaces and rings. You have been out at sea for exactly 2 months now, and were growing incredibly bored.
Thankfully, the waves were calm tonight, only a gentle breeze in your sail. You sat in the center of your raft, scaling a fish with your pocket knife, quietly humming to yourself a tune from long ago.
The moon hung full and bright in the sky, stars glittering among the empty indigo. That was one of the things you did love about this job, the view of the sky. As you are taking it in, you spot a movement in the water out of the corner of your eye. A shark? Dolphin? No, bigger. You stand up, knife clutched tightly in one hand, glancing around, trying to spot whatever it was again.
A note rings out into the air. Clear and high. A singular voice, filling the vast emptiness of the night. Were you going crazy? There was no one else out this far, and you couldn't identify where the sound was coming from. The noise surrounded you in a way, filling your head.
Again, the voice sings out. This time a series of notes. It was like nothing you had ever heard before. Now, it sounds more like the voice is behind you. You quickly turn around, only to see nothing but the ocean.
You hear a swish of water, something moving. Once again, sound echoes into the air, long, sustained. You slowly turn around, and you can just barely see hands, gripping the end of the raft. Then, up comes eyes, peering at you curiously. They practically glowed. You stumbled back in horror.
The creature raises an eyebrow and laughs softly at you. It lifts up so you could now see the head and chest, of what seems to be the most beautiful human you've ever layed eyes upon. He has dark curls, damp and pushed back out of his face, the sides shaven clean. Water droplets roll off of his skin, which looked as though it was made of porcelain. Not a single visible blemish. He had a little goatee, also dripping with the ocean. His eyes are what you drew you in the most, though. They were big and sweet, from how he appears. Welcoming browns surrounded by crystal white, but as he focused on you, his pupils narrowed into slits, the brown fading a bit. His lips were upturned in a little smile.
"Who are you?…" You manage out, your voice shaking against your will.
"Does it matter?" He responds. His voice is surprisingly raspy, not quite deep, but not as high as he sang.
"..Do you have a name?-" You question him, taking a little step forward, your knife held out in front of you.
"Joshua." The name was shockingly human, but there was no way in hell he was.
As you take a step closer, you are able to see him clearer. He is wearing lots of gold. A pendant dangles from his neck, shaped like the sun. Multiple earrings line his ears. Gold hoops wrap around his wrists, some sliding lower down his forearms. Rings of different shapes on every finger, foreign symbols you couldn't identify. He tilts his head slightly.
You have so many questions, yet all of the words are lost from you, caught in your throat, never uttered. He gives you a soft, gentle look before he begins to sing again, this time words, but it hardly mattered.
"Crash against wave upon wave, whoa-oh In strange horizons, ooh. Heel to the mist and the wind, yeah-yeah You make the movement, ooh"
You find yourself being drawn in to this. Slowly, you stumble forward, it felt like your feet were moving on their own. You drop your knife, it clatters against the wood, but you pay no attention to it. The creature reaches its hands out to you.
"Sail to the end of the world, whoa-oh For death or glory, ooh Bow with your face to the sky, yeah-yeah We are the movement, ooh"
You fall to your knees in front of him, and he cups your face in his hands, his nails ever lightly dig into the flesh, but you don't notice. Totally entranced by this voice, this thing that has found you.
He begins slowly pulling you downwards, still vocalizing. You let it happen, leaning forward, wanting to be closer, something in you urged to kiss him, longed for the connection. He smiles as he sinks down under the water, his eyes locked on yours. As his mouth opens, you can see his teeth are pointed into sharp fangs, his eyes narrowing even more.
Just as you get close enough, your nose touching the water, he drags you down. Claw like nails dig into your cheeks, you try to scream, but your mouth is filled with water. Salt fills you lungs as he pulls you to the deep. He lets you go and you sink down, left to rot in the pit of the empty sea.
~
The sun beats down brightly on your face. You awake on your raft, perfectly dry, perfectly unharmed. You sit up, looking around, confused. Was it all a dream? Everything is seemingly normal..
..Yet, every box of jewelry has disappeared, and you notice, clutched tightly in the palm of your hand is a singular golden scale.
Hay
Oh to kiss jake in the rain while Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls plays