“I Don’t Fear Death Anymore, But I Fear Life. I Fear I’ll Never Be Rid Of This Bitterness. Never

"Um, I took walks, mostly." I shift in the cushioned chair, tucking a strand of my loose hair behind my ear. "Watched Netflix. Went to the gym."

Lies. All lies. I binged on Christmas candy my mom sent-or rather her assistant sent, because my mom didn't want me to come home for the holidays. I sat on the couch all day and watched porn while sucking on Twizzlers and listening to Lana Del Rey in the background. I'm addicted to that woman. Seriously, she is a goddess. Every word out of her mouth is gold.

I'm not addicted to porn or Twizzlers, however. Those are just for when I get lonely...which is most of the time, but that's beside the point.

The Unrequited by Saffron A. Kent

“From afar, Alex Winslow looked like nothing could penetrate his armor. But he was an artist—and an artist’s armor is full of bullets and cracks. That’s how the lyrics and notes seep through.”

Midnight Blue by L.J. Shen

“He needs me to be a giant pain in his ass and tell him to put out his stupid cigarette when he gets stressed over his supposed failures. When he doesn’t listen to me and puts out his cancer stick, he needs me to put my mouth on his and kiss him, inhaling that smoke into my own lungs.

When he fists my hair and pulls my mouth back, looking all hot and angry, he needs me to tell him, “If you wanna kill yourself, then I’ll die with you too.”

And when he gets all jacked up by that, he needs me to spread my legs so he can fuck it all out of his system.”

My Darling Arrow by Saffron A. Kent

“I liked that he took existentially fraught free throws. I liked that he was a tenured professor in the Department of Slightly Crooked Smiles with a dual appointment in the Department of Having a Voice That Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin.”

The Fault In Our Stars by John Green

“Then I kiss her.

I kiss her like I need her soul tangled with mine.

She kisses back like it’s happened already for years.”

Addicted After All by Krista and Becca Ritchie

Jenny Slate, Little Weirds

“I lift my hands to the doorframe above her head and I smile down at her. “Fucking beautiful,” I whisper.

She smiles and then ducks her head. “I feel stupid.”

“I barely know you, so I’m not about to argue with you over your level of intelligence, because you could very well be as dumb as a rock. But at least you’re pretty.”

She laughs and focuses on my eyes for a beat, but then her focus falls to my mouth and God, I want to kiss her. I want to kiss her so bad it hurts and now I can’t smile anymore because I’m in too much pain.

“What’s wrong?”

I grimace and grip the doorframe tighter. “I want to kiss you really, really bad and I’m doing everything in my power not to do that yet.”

November 9 by Colleen Hoover

“They looked at each other like they were . . . in love. My chest hurt, and my smile fell. I wished love was visible, like the sparkles on Elena’s gown. Or the shimmer of the sun on skin. Then it couldn’t be hidden or faked.

I wondered what love felt like.

I wondered if it even existed.”

The Maddest Obsession by Danielle Lori

“It’ll be your new favorite dress.”

I kiss her forehead, and work my way down over her temple, across her cheek. “My favorite dress of yours will always be…the one on the floor.”

Tangled series by Emma Chase