Heroes-feasting - Hello Bonjour

Hey students, here’s a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while you’re seriously sick.

Signed, a person who somehow came up with “dear hello, I am sick and not sure if I’ll be alive to come tomorrow and I’m sorry, best slutantions, [name]”.

Dwarven Flatbread

According to folklore, these tasty flat loaves weren’t created in the kitchen, but rather at the forge as ever-industrious, hungry dwarven craftsmen utilized the only materials they had available: flour, oil, water, salt, a hearth, and a hammer.” - Heroes’ Feast, p. 103

I've been interested in making flatbread for about a year now but always felt strangely intimidated by it. It wasn’t until I found this recipe and saw how quickly and simply it could be done that I decided to give it a shot.

Simple yet absolutely delicious, this wonderfully seasoned flatbread has just enough of a spice kick for it to stand out on its own or when eaten with the Fire Lichen Spread (p. 93) or a tzatziki dip!

Previously attempted by @afinickyguide, this review looks to take their suggestions to heart while also adding some of my own!

See below for my notes on the results and for some helpful tips and tricks when making this yourself! Get Heroes’ Feast here: https://dnd.wizards.com/heroes-feast

Prep time: ~5 mins           Cook time: ~40 mins           Overall: ~45 mins

For the ingredients:

1 ½ cups all-purpose flour, plus more for dusting

1 ½ tsp. baking powder

½ tsp. baking soda

1 ½ tsp. kosher salt*

2 ½ tsp. dried herb blend (such as Italian seasoning, herbes de Provence, or za’atar), crushed **

3 tbsp. extra-virgin olive oil

⅔ cup plain low-fat Greek yogurt or whole milk***

¼ cup neutral-tasting oil, such as vegetable, canola, safflower, or grapeseed

* This is way too much salt. Use half of this amount (¾ tsp.).

** I didn’t have any Italian seasoning, so I used ½ tsp. each of dried basil, oregano, rosemary, thyme, and marjoram as well as ¼ tsp. red pepper flakes (modified from here)

*** I used 2% plain greek yogurt.

I use the following conversions in my cooking:

1 ½ cups all-purpose flour = 188 g

1 ½ tsp. baking powder = 6 g

½ tsp. baking soda = 4 g

1 ½ tsp. kosher salt = 8 g

½ tsp. dried rosemary = 1 g

½ tsp. dried basil = 0.5 g

½ tsp. dried oregano = 0.5 g

½ tsp. dried thyme = 0.5 g

½ tsp. dried marjoram leaves = 0.25 g

¼ tsp. red pepper flakes = 0.5 g

3 tbsp. extra-virgin olive oil = 44 ml

⅔ cup plain low-fat Greek yogurt = 158 ml

¼ cup neutral-tasting oil = 60 ml

Above shows the dry ingredients whisked together with a well in the center for the greek yogurt and olive oil.

Again, when I made these the first time 1 ½ tsp. kosher salt was way too much. I made them again using half the amount (¾ tsp.) and they tasted much better.

Above is what the dough looked like after combining it with a wooden spoon and then working it by hand to create a shaggy dough.

The dough will be very dry and have lots of crumbly bits. Don’t worry! As you knead it into a smooth ball, the dough will become wetter and everything will incorporate nicely.

Above is what the dough looked like after kneading to make it smooth - about 5-6 minutes. You’ll know the dough is ready when it springs back after lightly pressing into it.

Although the dough will become tackier as you knead it, try not to add any more flour. Dough, in general, will absorb any extra flour you give it and though it might make it slightly easier to handle, the bread will become denser as a result.

Personally, I found the dough didn’t stick much to my bread board and when it did it was easy enough to handle with just a bench scraper.

The following link is a great resource to develop your technique for kneading bread. With the first technique, you use the heel of your hand to press into the dough, then fold it back into itself, turn it, and repeat. Using the second technique, you roll the dough with the heel of your hand in a “heart” motion.

Above is what the dough looked like after being divided into 8 equal portions and left to rest for 15 minutes under a clean kitchen towel. The smooth dough weighed around 400 g and divided nicely into 50 g portions.

Although you will notice the dough has expanded after resting, don’t expect as drastic a change as yeasted dough.

With the amount of dough in each portion, rolling it to 7 inches in diameter turned it into paper and gave it “cracker-like results” according to @afinickyguide‘s post. So, I opted to roll them to 5 inches in diameter and just under ¼ of an inch thick.

If you’d really like some larger flatbread, I would recommend taking @afinickyguide‘s suggestion and doubling the recipe to create 8 larger portions that could be rolled into 7-inch circles.

I found the cooking times in Heroes’ Feast to be way too long. When I originally tried frying it for 2.5 minutes, it turned out super burned when I flipped it - and that was before the pan had accumulated heat!

I would suggest the following cooking times for this recipe (using flatbread rolled to 5 inches in diameter):

While the pan is heating up, cook the first flatbread for ~90 secs on the first side and 60 secs on the other

For the second, cook for 30 seconds on the first side and 20 on the other

For each one after, cook for 15 seconds on the first side and 10 on the other

Also, don’t replenish the pan with 1 ½ tsp. oil for each flatbread if following my instructions! There was so much oil left after each one that it’s much better to swirl around and reuse the leftover oil in the pan. Only add ~½ tsp. more if you notice the oil level running low.

NOTE: I used a cast-iron skillet to cook my flatbread. Timings will vary based on the type of pan you use.

Overall, I give this flatbread a 5/5. After the adjustment of the salt content, these were delicious to eat both on their own, with a tzatziki dip, or with the Fire Lichen Spread (p. 93).

Although I can’t comment on how they would taste with store-bought Italian seasoning, the one I used (listed in the ingredients section) worked amazingly!

For best freshness results, wrap in plastic wrap or store in a reusable sandwich back and keep in the fridge. They will last up to a week in the fridge. To reheat, either leave them on the counter for half an hour before using or microwave them for 10 seconds at a time until soft.

VOTE now!: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/LHFG8PD

The winner will be announced December 24th at 3pm EST!

episode forty-seven: gingerbread man (part two) [feat my very special baking assistant💕] 🍪🏠❄️

this is my entry for the unofficial 2021 Heroes’ Feast Gingerbread Showcase!! You can vote for your favorite here!

Be sure to check out my fellow competitors @heroes-feasting @sopranosamnahra and @luboffin to see their entries as well! Voting ends 12/24

Recipes mentioned:

Gingerbread Man Part One

Trolltide Candied Apples

At this point half the reason I still put up with TiKTok is the insane bakers and cooks. I mean LOOK AT THIS.

Adventures In Dark Green Chocolate

“i sure would like too” - saved snip title

I started planning MCC’s Green Guardians dessert back in July and little did I know that acquiring dark green melting chocolate would end up being the hardest part of the project. A real Indiana Jones style adventure lmao. 

(Click keep reading for The Adventure)

Not only does dark green happen to be the only colour Sweet Tooth Fairy doesn’t stock, but Wilton’s candy melts aren’t sold here (although apparently they taste bad now so *shrug*) and Bulk Barn only stocks Merken’s seasonally.

Really wanting to make this, I decided to try Wilton candy dye with white chocolate instead of using coloured wafers. However, the green dye ended up being too light, even when adding a lot, and mixing in black desaturated the colour. Not to mention that the black dye had turned into a paste in its container before I’d even opened it and made it near impossible to measure the amount being added.

Fortunately for me, Jay (chocolate crow) and Autumn in Philza’s chat were kind enough to help with the colour saturation issue (ph1lLove catKISS).

Unfortunately for me, after some trial and error, the Green Guardian’s dark green turned out to be more yellow-green then blue-green. Double unfortunate for me is that Wilton does have a candy dye pack with yellow, but those weren’t available.

Now back at square one, I headed to Micheal's, bought a box of Satin Ice candy dye since they looked darker and… walked into Bulk Barn for white chocolate to find they’d started stocking the Merken’s dark green wafers ahead of the holiday season. Yes, it was November by this time. Yes, it was pain and suffering to see them.

The Merken’s wafers were still more blue-green then expected, but adding some orange wafers (also in stock) helped keep the colour from becoming too light while turning it yellow-green. After that, all I needed to do was make it darker. 

The black melting wafers weren’t in stock (and, with my luck, probably won’t be until Halloween), but I still had the Satin Ice colour I’d bought. Although I might have been able to try melting some Sweet Tooth Fairy black wafers, I was worried that mixing brands would cause the chocolate to separate.

But, ta-da!, I got the dark green I was looking for! … Well kinda. The colour looked perfect in the candy mold, but was way too dark when piped or dipped into. At this point, though, MCC was set for December 3rd and I really wanted to share this, even if it wasn’t exactly right.

However, I do still think I was on the right track and that the edits to my process will net a more accurate colour.

So, what did I learn from this? Aside from Canada’s apparent hatred of dark green chocolate wafers /j. 

I don’t know… I think if there's one thing it would be patience? Even when I was lamenting back in July that the wafers weren’t in stock now, I had reason to assume they would be later. And waiting to see would have saved me money on the candy dye and white chocolate.

So, I guess the thing to bring into future projects is to really think about if what I’m looking for is likely to be in stock/back in stock before trying a workaround - even if I’m really excited. Especially if the season for that thing to be in stock is close(ish) and not after when I’m hoping to have something out for.

Oh my god

I’m sorry. We tried to make your boyfriend in a poll, and he’s 84% vanilla extract now. Yeah. I’m sorry. He’ll smell really good if you bake him, though!

Update: I’ve tried this a couple of times now with mild Italian chicken sausage as a substitute for pork and its tasted really good!

You do get a much stronger chicken flavour since the broth is chicken broth but you can offset it a little with a few more cloves of garlic.

The Ultimate Sausage Pasta

“This is the best pasta I’ve ever had” - Everyone who’s tried it

Living with other people is a valuable experience for any young person - especially when you get the chance to share meals and recipes. It’s amazing what kinds of foods you can add to your cooking arsenal and this pasta is one of them!

Originally introduced through the friend of my housemate, I can say with absolute confidence that this is the best pasta I, and everyone who’s tried it, has ever had. The best part? It only takes half an hour to make!

With it’s quick cooking time on consistent heat, easy steps, and simple ingredients, it makes for the perfect meal for everyone from an on-the-go student looking for a cheap, filling meal to a busy professional.

VEGETARIAN? No problem! Check the results sections for tips on changes to make the recipe work for you.

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