Heresthelinguine - Spasfon

Ossuaries, Dionne Brand

7 Reasons Being a College Student is Just Like Being Old [collegehumor] Previously: Single vs. Relationship

fake idgafer. i saw tht haunted look in ur eyes

writing prompts for the soul

-“i’ve been on this claw machine for 5 minutes straight feeding it dollar after fuckin dollar and i just went to get some change and YOU swoop in and steal my fucking prize in one shitty go and i hope you feel my eyes burning holes in the back of your head” au

-“i’ve been in love with you since we were kids and im unhealthily reliant on music so i absently make mixtapes that remind me of you but i’m also a massive wimp so i just let these labelled tapes collect in a desk drawer next to my computer and when you come over one day i go to get a drink and come back to see you with these tapes scattered in front of you and whoops look at the time it seems like the perfect hour to confess my undying love” au

-“i have literally never laid eyes on you before in my life and i see you and these people and one of them calls you an insulting name and i step in to try and defend you only to discover the rude one is your sibling and you always joke around and do you have time to help me bury myself” au

-“your shitty child is screaming enough on this plane to sound like they’re hacking up a lung and oh my god im so tempted to slam myself through a window but im a naturally intimidating-looking person so i just give the monkey a glare stony enough to startle medusa herself and they start LAUGHING and i dont think ive been equally embarassed and relieved in my life” au

-“before this i have never felt attraction to anything and have always been the reliable stoic shitbag of my friend group but i see you in this outfit that literally says ‘fuck you, gender roles’ and im pretty sure im going into cardiac arrest” au

-“i live in a rlly high apartment in a city and you’re the window cleaner who decides to come wash my windows and you’re literally gorgeous but you seem to be afraid of heights and im starting to think you might need to consider a change of career” au

-“i work in a tech store and there’s tvs that are always on and for whatever reason you always come in to subtly watch one and when i ask a co-worker they say you’ve been doing it for months and i approach and find out that your asshole cat keeps breaking your shit and im sorry for laughing but holy fuck” au

Shaka and Māra, the demon King of the Sixth Realm~

Lydia Love <3

[guy who keeps dying and coming back voice] Why does everyone look so upset lol

no revenge because I forgot what you did #memoryloss