Hey Doves! :)

Would you guys be interested in a Meredith Dardenne x Reader smut?

I just finished the book and I absolutely ADORED her, but there aren’t any writing on her:(

hey hey!! any new fics coming??

Hey hey!! Well, I have a few scenarios in mind, but I haven’t written a word.

Sorry for the answer, I promise I will drop something soon:)

xoxo my doves

Cerasa et vinum

The first smut is here, doves! :) Have fun.

warning: sexual content

For the life of her, she couldn’t sleep.

She liked summer. The fresh fruits from the market, dresses everyday, warm nights, and just killing time away in the country house with her dear friends doing all kinds of things. It was heavenly, really. Having to go nowhere, drinking out of tea cups and smoking cigarettes all day. This was her favorite thing in the whole world, well… Almost. If she was honest, her favorite thing in the world was a certain person, with the name Henry Winter. The group altogether was really close, but her and Henry had a different type of bond. It was precious, really. Everyone saw it, but nobody ever said anything, there was no need to. 

But back to that certain summer night, she was tossing and turning for what it seemed like hours. She thought that the drinking card game they played a few hours prior would guarantee her a good and long night of sleep, but to her disappointment it didn’t. She sat up  and checked the time on her watch that was placed on the nightstand, 2 AM. She was used to sleepless nights, so she got out of bed and headed down to the country house’s library. It had plenty of good books and a nice book always relaxed her mind, if she cannot sleep a relaxed mind will do. As she walked across the huge hallway, looking at the paintings and as a routine admiring the gothic style of the mansion, Francis’s ancestors certainly had divine tastes. The hallway was dimly lit and the moonlight also gifted it a bit more light thanks to the large floor to ceiling windows, everyone else was out like a light, Everyone got stupid drunk, at least they got their beauty sleep, she thought. This house could never scare her, she had so many good memories in this house that she could not be afraid of the dark parts. 

The library of the country house was one of the greatest thing she had the pleasure of seeing, it was huge. It even had little secret spots, that was her favorite, she had found a quiet hidden corner of the library. It had comfortable armchairs and a huge vintage desk, that she used for studying when they came up here on the weekends.

Her first stop was the kitchen, she didn’t plan on leaving her spot for a few hours so she needed some sort of snack. She found some sweet and plump cherries that she bought with Richard from the farmers market the previous morning, and an unopened bottle of red wine also caught her eye, it would be a shame to leave it in the kitchen all alone. Now with her sweet cherries and wine, she headed to her original destination. She must have looked like some ethereal spirit haunting the walls, with her hair sprawled freely across her back and her silky nightgown lightly jostling with the warm summer breeze that managed to sneak into the house. 

In the back of her mind she expected that she was not going to be alone in the library, and she didn’t mind at all. In fact, it made her heart happy. If there was something small she really cherished, it was the intimate moments between her and Henry. The hour long talks they had, sometimes they talked without any words said, their eyes told it all. And of course, let’s not forget about their very sexual affairs. As she was wondering about him, she barely realised that she made it to the corner of the spot. Just like she expected, many candles were lit in a very warm and comfortable light. 

There he was, in black trousers and a white shirt, reading a book as usual. At the noises of her arrival he lifted his head up in her direction and let out a warm boyish grin that only a very few people saw.

“Hello, melilla.” he said, looking up at her.

She flashed a smile to him as a response and put her treasures on the desk beside him. When she turned back to him he was shamelessly getting lost in her figure, so she did the same. His hair was looking perfect, as always, what was quite unlikely of him was that his shirt was rolled up to his elbows and the first two buttons were unbuttoned, making his collar loose, and was he looking divine. He lifted his wrist up and motioned her to come to him wiith two fingers, and who was she to not listen to him. He uncrossed his legs from their previous crossed position and she stood between his spread legs. She put one of her hands on one his broad shoulder and let the other get lost in his hair, while she did that he ran his hands up from her bare thighs to her waist and caressed her silk covered body.

“Can’t sleep?” she asked him while her eyes roamed all around his face, he shook his head in answer.

“You neither?” she did exactly what he did seconds ago, she shook her head. 

He gave her a gently smile, his fingers crawled over to the small of her back and he suddenly pulled her body close to his. His head was resting against her stomach, she loved these soft moments with all her heart, she soothingly began to stroke his hair,

After a few moments, he pulled his head back and spoke while diving deep into her eyes.

“You are the most divine little thing, do you know that?” he never failed to make her feel like a goddess, she replied with a nod and a shy smile.

“I mean it, Y/N. Tu divinissimus es, et meus es adorare.” 

“Scio, me tuum adorare in aeternum.” he slowly stood up and towered over her. He took a hold of her hips, like a predator with precise movements he started pushing slightly at her, which made her walk backward. Blindly listening to his silent command, when her lower back met the desk, in a smooth movement he dipped his palms under her thighs and lifted her up to the desk as if she was only a feather. Not many would assume how strong the once injured classics student is, but she knew it. 

His fingertips were either caressing her features or stroking the hair away from her face. 

“Tell me, who got you this nightgown?” the bastard, he already knew the answer very well.

“You did, Henry.” she was drunk on this whole scenario. She had flashbacks about how she got this nightgown. One sunday dinner Francis overpoured the alcohol in her drink, and she accidentally overshared that she finds it hard to see how someone could see her in an erotic light. The next night a big box was in front of her door, full of silk and lace with a note. 

To my sweet goddess, and the nymph to all my desires - H.W

“And how happy I am that I did, you look absolutely ravishing in silk, melilla.” a certain look in his eyes and his words were making her clench her thighs together, but she failed considering that his hips were between them. When he realized what she tried to do, a smirk sat on his lips. “What is it, darling?” as if he hadn’t known. “You love it when I tell you how beautiful you are? How I think that you must be Aphrodite’s favourite? How I could just eat you up right here and now? Oh, right. I can do that, because you” he leaned closely into her ear “are mine to please.” he whispered to her, in her ear and pressed a long kiss on her temple, then her forehead. 

His movements went from slow to impatient. He captured her lips between his own and gripped her hair, the suddenness of it all made her heart beat faster, or maybe it was just him. 

When she pushed back into their kiss, all hell broke loose, he pulled her hair a bit, just enough to make her gasp and when her lips opened a bit, he let his tongue explore her mouth. 

Then he went to her neck and collarbones. Kissing and sucking love marks into her soft skin. The scent of her made him a starved and impatient man, he was starving for a taste of her, he knew that he would starve for her taste for an eternity, and he would be happy to if at the end of the day he could get it from her. 

His fingers took a hold of the straps of her silk gown and pushed them down her shoulders, exposing her now bare breasts. “Beautiful, my prettiest girl.” He sponged kisses to every inch of her chest, he looked up at her and when their eyes met he pressed a kiss to her throat. After this little moment he leant down and went straight to her nipples with his mouth, his other hand was preoccupied with her other breast, massaging it. She tried to keep her moans down, but he made it very very hard for her to do that. After he was satisfied with the amount of bite marks on her breast he went lower and lower, kissing her stomach are through the silk. He was looking at her when he slowly went down on his knees in front of her, as if he was about to pray to her. He smoothed his hands under the lacy bottom of her nightgown and him palms nearly covered all of the soft skin of her thigh, they slipped to the insides of her thighs and spread her legs ever more apart, now revealing her lace underwear.

“Will you let me, my sweet goddess? Will you let me taste and please you in a way that you should be?” she nearly moaned out at his sentence, he already knew that he would, even though he was the one on his knees he was still in charge, it made her dizzy with desire. She nodded eagerly and at that he chuckled and went straight in. At first he pressed a few kisses to her crotch through the lace, then he hooked her fingers into the band and pulled it down her dove legs, to her surprise he just stuck it in his trouser pocket. He slowly leaned in and deeply inhaled her scent. “Divine.” he whispered to her. He ran his tongue all the way from her slit to her clit, he stopped at her pearl and went from kissing to sucking and back and fourth. He went back down to her slit and opened her up with his thumps, and when she was wide open for him he stuck his tongue into her. Boy, he really knew what he was doing, always the right amount of tempo at the right spots at the right time. After a few minutes, he teased his middle and ring finger at her opening, gathering her wetness and pushing them in and out at a light pace. 

“Oh, Henry, oh.” she couldn’t keep herself up, her back arching off the dark wood desk, her fingers gripping at his hair. They were far away from the others and they were out like a light so she was not holding her breathy moans down, and it was the most beautiful music to his ears. He even fastened his pace up, moved his fingers at a rapid pace and his mouth on her clit was working magic. He knew she was close, her walls were closing on his fingers and her moans turned to breathless gasps. 

“Come on, darling. I know you are nearly there, let go. Let go, my sweet girl. She let go and made a spasming movement, he slowed down to really savor her high. When her breathing got even again he stood back up, leant down to her laying body and kissed her open lips. She hummed pleasatly at her own taste on his tongue.

She let her hands wander across his chest, her fingers unbuttoned the rest of his buttons, smoothing his skin up and down.

“I am aching for you, Y/N, I really am.” He stood up straight and she could see the tent in his pants. It made her smirk at him, she knew that she was the only one who could get him going any second she wanted to. “Oh, don’t you get evil with me, help me out.” he had her chin in his palms. She reached down and unbuttoned his pants, he pushed it down his legs along with his underwear, it always surprised her how big he was, I mean, down there. She looked deep into his eyes while she spread her legs for him, an invitation only for him. He felt like he was on fire, he needed her, so he didn’t spare a second and stepped closer, his length was right at her opening, twitching and pulsing to feel her warmth snug against him. 

“Go on, Henry, I am yours, make us one.” She whispered, he leaned down to devour her lips and suddenly snapped his hips forward in a sudden movement, entering her and even the desk creaked at his sudden move. They both gasped, and he didn’t go at a fast pace right away, he really savored the movements of his hips. 

One of his favorite feeling was making love to his muse, his everything. Holding her tightly in his arms, feeling her warmth all around her, hearing her cries of pleasure for him, caressing her face and her soft locks. He loved her, he would do anything to protect the girl that he was making love to. As the minutes went by, his pace fastened, his drawn out movements went to rather impatient ones. 

It was a heavenly sight to see, two ethereal creatures, who loved each other so much that they would be willing to die for the other, now being one. Her nails were clawing at his back, the pain made him even more excited and motivated in fucking her. He was either kissing her lips or her swan neck. 

“Damn right you are mine. You like that don’t you? That you belong to me, that I am the one that gets to fuck you.” he didn’t swear much, but when he did it made her blood heated. 

“Yes, yes I am.” she whispered in an out-of-breath tone. She loved it when he claimed her like that, both with his words and actions.

“Of course, and the others think you’re so innocent, well well well. They don’t know how many times you climbed into my bed, letting me worship my goddess. My sweet sweet girl.” he was near his high, and so was she, again. He could feel her walls grip him and she could feel his hot member pulsate inside of her, he could feel her up so very perfectly, the perfect angle of his hips hitting every dear spot of her. “Let me tell you a little secret, I am yours too. My soul and heart is yours, only yours for eternity, no one will ever live up to you and I don’t want anyone else other than you. Everytime I lay eyes on you, I thank the Gods for gifting you to my life. I love you.” 

“I-I love you, Henry. I love you.” it made him truly smile, and then he reached down and started rubbing at her clit to get her closer.

She threw her arms over his neck, her legs closed at his waist and she pulled him close to her. With his free arm he reached under her arching back and did the same as her. Suddenly he came to a halt and she felt his hot thick seed spill into her, moaning out of ecstasy 

As they reached their own highs in their loving embrace, and held it until their hearts stopped beating so fast and they could breath properly again. 

He kissed her on her forehead and rest his own on hers. She sat up and he slipped out of her, he watched as his creamy load dripped out of her.

“Hm, you really did fill me up.” she softly laughed.

“Only for you, my darling.” 

He helped her put her nightgown back in place and he gave his shirt to her, so she would be nice and warm. Pulled his trousers back up and got her panties out of his pocket, he held her waist as she got back on her wobbly legs, she held on to his shoulders as he pulled her lace up her legs. They got some tissues and cleaned up.

He sat down back into the armchair where he originally sat before she came here, she got the cherries and the wine from the table and made her way to him. He pulled her in his lap and she rested her head on his chest, his heartbeat soothing her. 

Henry fed her a few cherries, so she could get some of her energy back and ate some himself. While he read his book he caressed her hair, he looked down at the nearly sleeping goddess in his arms and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

“Sweet dreams, my love.” and with a smile, she fell asleep in her lover’s arms, in the country house’s library.

Si vis amari, ama

The first writing is here. Excuse me if I had made any mistakes, english is not my first language.

You may think that Henry is ooc here, but we never knew what went on in his head...

I hope that you will enjoy my writing!

xoxo, Rosemary

warnings: none, we are just getting warmed up, doves:)

Henry’s point of view

I was on my way to the Lycée as usual, nothing seemed out of order that day, it was just like any other days I’ve lived, before her. I arrived at Julian’s office and I’ve let myself in, Everyone except the twins were already there, sitting and sipping their tea. When  they heard the door close, they snapped out of the conversation I interrupted and looked up at me from their seats.

“Well, nice of you to join us.” said Francis first. Then they all stood up and greeted me as I greeted them. Now with me in the group, we made our way back to the seats in the office, I sat in my usual leather armchair. I reached for my tea and I noticed one more on the table. Why one? If we were waiting on the twins, there would be two extra teacups on the table. So, why one? Maybe one of them is sick, I thought.

“The twins are not in town.” Julian interrupted my train of curious thoughts on the twins lack of presence and the extra tea cup. “Their grandmother got some cold and they hopped right on the train, so we won’t be expecting them today and probably a few days.” Julian stood up and checked the time on his watch, then he went to the door and looked out the hallway. I thought I heard him mutter something under his breath, I just didn’t heard what, I found his behavior rather strange. I looked over the others and I was met with three confused expressions, they looked at me as if I knew what was going on. 

“What is going on? Why is he acting like this?” Bunny and Richard mouthed these questions at me, I just shrugged my shoulders. If I was completely honest, it rather bothered me that I didn’t know what was the case in today’s class, what I knew is that I felt something, but for the life of me I couldn’t say if it was a good or bad feeling. But as I almost got into another thought cycle, Julian stood in front of us and began speaking,

“I suppose you want answers, why am I looking rather impatient?” he looked in our eyes with his usual warm expression. “I have an announcement to make, one that is quite rare,” 

“Should we be scared? I don’t know about you guys, but I have an awful gut feeling about this.” said Bunny with his eyes wider than usual.

“You are being a drama queen as usual, dear Bunny.” snickered Francis in response.

“Who says, cher Francois?” Bunny answered with a fake offence in his expression, Francis just stuck his tongue out and turned back to our professor.

Julian looked at me and Richard like a father who is finding amusement in his kids bickering, and we were kind of like his kids. 

“Calm your horses, children. If you skipped the joking, you would have already known what I’m about to say,” of course, they got quiet and they put all their attention on Julian. I was on the edge, I so badly wanted to know what he had to say. “Now that I have all your attention, let me make the announcement that I’ve grown quite fond of and I am sure that you will too.” he paused for the dramatic pause. “A new pupil will be joining our small circle!” we just stared in front of us, letting the new information sink in our minds. A new student in the greek class? Again? I always had a hard time getting used to new people around me, and after Richard I didn’t wish to do it again for a while, but as it seems Julian had different plans against my favour. With Richard we got lucky, everyone in our small circle liked him and he fit right in, but maybe luck will not be on our side this time.

“Again? Julian, I believe you are slowly letting every idiot in this class?” said Bunny, offended. Then he paused and looked at Richard, “no offense, old chap,”

“None taken.” said Richard, he tried not to look hurt and he managed to trick Bunny, but Francis and I noticed. While I shot Bunny a belittling glance, Francis caressed his sides in a comforting manner and the hurting look in Richard’s eyes went away in an instant.

“That is quite short-minded of you, Edmund” Julian shook his head as he said “Believe me when I say that our new student is brilliant and charming.” we sat in silence for a few moments, and while I wasn’t exactly thrilled at the thought of getting used to a new person, I was curious about the brilliance and the charm Julian mentioned. 

“What’s his name?” asked Richard after a little while. The second he finished the sentence there was a knock on the door, which caused all of us to snap our heads in the direction  of the door.

“Very well then,” Julian smiled suddenly and made his way to the door, just as he put his hands on the door handle he said “why don’t you ask that from her?” and he opened a door just a little bit and began talking to the person in front of the door. While I was focused on the door and the person behind it, I heard the others talking in shushed voices. “Her? Another girl? I could hardly tolerate Camilla, but another one? This is straight up bullshit!” At that I turned my head in his direction and what I saw was a very annoyed Bunny, how childish.

“What is wrong with Camilla? Don’t be like that, Bun.” Francis immediately slightly raised his voice a bit. 

“Am I hearing that you are questioning Julian’s opinion? And you are already against her and hating her just because she is a girl? Misogyny is one of the stupidest things to exist and yet, you are the first in line for it the second your fragile pride realizes that she is could be smarter than you.” Bunny furrowed his brows in confusion at first, but only for a second. Then he almost said something back at me if Francis didn’t interrupt him. “Henry’s right, Bun. We should meet her first and then we can form an opinion about her.”  “Guys– I think we’re about to meet her!” Richard said in a fast sentence and he was looking in the direction of the door, the second I turned my head to do the same, the door opened. Julian opened the door fully and beauty on earth herself, in a short skirt and a dark blue sweater, walked in. She was goddess like, everything about her. From her head of long and full curls, to the long legs that carried her in the most graceful way I’ve ever seen. Her gaze wandered to me first, and it made my breath stop in my throat. Those eyes sucked me in, those eyes that were the most prettiest shades. Is this what they describe in the books? When Julian put his palms on her shoulder and began speaking again she tore her gaze away from my eyes. It made me want to walk over to her and hold her face in one place so she can’t deny those eyes from me. Julian made her stand in front of all of us, I looked over to the others to see if they saw the same thing I did, and they did. They were all looking at her as if she was the most exotic thing in this land, and maybe she was. I found Bunny’s expression rather funny, he was just hating at the mention of her and now he was shamelessly staring at her with an open mouth. Julian put her in a spot where the sun was shining, now she looked like she just stepped right out of a fairytale, her pale skin was shining in the sunlight, and so did her hair and eyes, with the slight blush of her cheeks she really looked like an angel on earth. I almost jumped when Julian began speaking again. “Everyone, meet our Aphrodite!” at that she, let out a light giggle and her sweet sweet voice went straight to my heart. And when she began talking I almost melted, as if I wasn’t myself in that moment.

“Well thank you Julian,” she looked at him and flashed a charming and warm smile to him. “But, no one is as beautiful as Aphrodite, she is not just beautiful, but she is beauty herself. Whatever is beauty, she is exactly that.” Julian seemed surprised that she corrected him, but then he smiled, because he knew that she was right. Right she was, just knowing that she is willing to correct someone even if they are complementing her impressed me. And I always believed that it was hard to impress me, but she already did it with the fist sentence I heard her speak. I drank every word she said, and I still craved more.

“Very well, my dear. Already correcting the teacher, very brave. I can tell you will fit right in.” that made her smile shyly. “Why don’t you sit down and tell us about yourself? We already have tea prepared for you.” he guided her to the seat that was facing mine, and then he sat down on a seat himself. “Because the lack of our beloved twins and our new addition I decided that we just talk today.” he looked around. Francis, Richard and Bunny let out a relieved sigh in unison. Normally, I would have been mad that we talked about anything that’s not greek or latin, but I wanted to hear her speak more. It almost didn’t matter what she would talk about, I just wanted to hear more of that sweet skylark voice, but I also needed to know more about her. Who was I in that moment?

“Thank you, this is a very warm welcome you are giving me.” she took a sip of her tea and I believe she was smiling at Francis, who was almost as fascinated with her as I was. She introduced herself, her name matched her, she had an accent I believe, she didn’t pronounce her name like we would have.

“Well, Y/N. “Julian responded before anyone else could, “these are my boys,” he introduced us to her,but when he saw our inability to talk, he did it himself. “That red haired fellow is Francis Abernathy, also our new addition Richard Papen, Edmund Corcoran also known as ‘Bunny’ and the brilliant Henry Winter.” she followed us with her gaze as Julian introduced us one by one and she gave us all a small smile, Francis made a face and winked at her. That made her smile widely with her teeth, I wanted to make her smile like that. Too bad, I don’t know how to make people laugh out loud. Until now that didn’t bothered me, it still doesn’t if I’m talking about anyone else, but her. “Are you american?” asked Bunny “I mean, obviously you’re not, so like, where are you from?” she sat back a bit and crossed her legs, for a second I saw the lacy top of her black thights and it made my breath hitch in my throat, and that caused me to clear my throat. A bit louder than I anticipated so now all eyes shot to me. I just reached for my tea and took a long sip. I put the teacup back in it’s original place on the table and I lifted my chin towards her, signalling that she can continue. It seemed that it was hard for her to tear her gaze away from mine, she zoned out for a mere second while looking deeply into my eyes through my glasses. Now that she quite close from me I could see the shade of her eyes, and I have never seen a pair of eyes so confusing. They had shades of dark green, the darkest of blues and gray. But they were none of the above, and when I realized that, I knew that those eyes we’re going to follow me anywhere I go.

“No, I am definitely not from america, I’m from europe. A little bit from everywhere. The blood of my family is very colorful, so I don’t tie myself down to one nationality.” she reached for her tea and took small sips as she let the information she just gave us sink in. “It may sound like that, but if I’m honest I didn’t see much of the world.”

We talked for a while, which wasn’t much because Bunny and Richard had to go, but not a second of it was awkward. She had quite the talent to fill up the silence, without sounding boring or anything of the sort. Bunny had a dentists appointment and, of course, he is too much of a child to go on his own, so he found someone to drag to the other side of town and in this case Richard was the victim. Me and Francis bid our goodbyes and left, except Francis gave her a big hug. I just stood by the door and gave her a small nod, barely a smile. She needed to stay in  the office for a bit, so Julian could give her everything we did in the past classes, because when she arrived in Hampden it was well into the semester. Strange. 

Me and Francis stood in front of the building and lit a cigarette, and stood in silence for a little while. It was nearing the end of autumn, but the leaves were too stubborn to leave the trees. Now that I was thinking about it, the color of the dark leaves matched her hair. She was like a mother or a child of autumn. I turned my head in Francis’s direction, and just as I expected he was already looking at me. What I didn’t expect was a sly smirk on his face, he smiled at me like he knew something that I didn’t, and maybe he did.

“Yes, Francis? Is there anything you would like to say?” I spoke when I realized that he was waiting for me to speak up first.

“Oh, it is nothing.” his grin became wider, but he was trying so hard to hide it. “So, how do you like Hampden’s Aphrodite?” he needed to bite down on his lips, so he wouldn’t burst out laughing. I knew what he was indicating, he noticed my mesmerization with her, but I was too stubborn to let him hear what he wanted, which was close to impossible, it was Francis after all.

“She seems intelligent, and the way she talks shows that she knows a lot of things.” I kept my answer casual, but Francis had other plans. 

“And she is very pretty, no?” he nudged my elbows with his, I shot him a cold look. But there was no denying, he knew that her beauty made a nest in my mind. “I am messing with you, I know you are too proud to admit that Henry Winter actually has a soul and he might have a small crush.” he looked like he was so proud of himself, proud that the second I let my emotions show - even if for a second - he could see them loud and clear. “Let me tell you something, I know that we have our differences in romantic interests, but I am most definitely not blind. That girl right in there is someone special, not just because of her beauty, but she is charming and she seems like she has a smart mind.” he was looking almost too deeply into my eyes. “What I am saying may be absolutely worthless to you, but I would not let my pride keep me away from that girl, a girl like her comes once in a lifetime. Do whatever you will with that information.” he patted me on the shoulders after he finished his dramatic speech. What bothered me the most was the fact that he was not saying nonsense.

“Her eyes are so confusing.” that was all I said, and for him it was enough. “I know, that’s what Camilla said and I noticed it myself. Those eyes match her.” we continued our conversation as if Francis never said his monologue about her and I. 

“Camilla knows her?” I realized a second later that Camilla already met her somehow. “When her and Charles were on their way to the train station, they stopped here on the way and Camilla ran up to Julian’s office to tell him about their situation. And she was there, they talked for a few minutes and Milly said that they were getting along really well and that she enjoyed their small talk.” said Francis. “Actually, I was thinking of inviting her over to the country house, what do you think?”

“It is perfectly fine by me,--” I looked behind Francis and there she was. She was a bit far away from us, and she didn’t notice our presence. Francis must have noticed the sudden stopping in my speech so he followed my gaze, when he realized what, or more like who I was looking at, we both got quiet. We just spectated her from afar as if any sudden movement would cause her to get away from our gazes, like a deer. She was now bundled up in an overcoat with a silk scarf and gloves, the wind lightly caressed her hair, as if it was trying to be gentle not to hurt her in anyway. She dug up a pack of cigarettes and lit one. As she stood there, looking up to the dark clouds in the sky and blowing out the tobacco out of those lips, I knew that I was going to take up on Francis’s advice. As if I wouldn’t have done that otherwise.

“Si vis amari, ama. (“If you want to be loved, love), said Francis out of the blue. He put out his cigarette, smiled at me and walked away.

I looked back at her, I couldn’t help the corners of my lips turning upwards and I murmured under my breath, to myself.

“Si vis amari, ama.”

Why aren't we talking about the fact that Henry marks his place in his books WITH A RIBBON?!

He is a little coquette princess:)) and I adore him for it.

Excuse for not being that active, but school has been kicking my butt and I need to feel like Henry would be proud of me, so I study.

But if I suddenly get inspiration then I’ll try to write little blurbs or something like that.

Despite this, I am checking this account constantly, so your requests or questions won’t go by unnoticed:)

xoxo

<3

Where are you my luv we miss you! Hope you’re well 🩷🩷

Aww thank you, this truly made my night:))

I am okay, school takes up most of my time so writing is kind of getting pushed away currently.

But I will try my best to suprise you doves soon with a little something<3

When are new fanfics coming? 🤓

Now:))

Heyy! Let me just start with saying that I LOVE your blog and the way that you write ♡ So I was wondering if you could write something involving Henry & a femme fatale girlfriend? I'm just curious about how Henry would like react to somebody like that xx

( english isn't my first language so if you notice any mistakes my apologies x)

Hi dove:) thank you so so so much! I am so glad that you like my writing and it means a lot to me:)

Of course! And thank you for requesting!

(english isn’t my first language either, so don’t worry xx)

Prologue

Hello, my darling doves

Suprise! The fanfiction began.

Before you dig into it… Yes, it is in a different timeline than the actual book, and not all things are same as in the book, but you will find out eventually:)

I hope you will like it and I’m always open to hear your opinions on it!

xoxo, Rosemary<3

warnings: none:) maybe alcohol use, but this is tsh so nobody really cares

summary: just some warming up

word count: 1.3k

Richard Papen, 1953

Some nights, I am still at that hotel. We all are. Charles with a gun in his hand, Camilla sobbing, Francis and I frozen, and Henry… Nearly smiling at the gun. The next events happened barely in a mere second. The screaming, the gunshots, the warm feeling in my stomach, the red wine and blood splashing. Henry lay dead on the floor, his pale face covered in blood. He was pronounced dead on the scene when the police arrived, while they were on their way Francis put a blanket on him, I don’t remember those moments very well. I only remember the blood on his face and his closed eyes. Francis was the only one who attended the funeral, I would have gone with him to Missouri, where he was getting buried, but I was laying in the hospital with a gunshot.

I never saw the twins ever again. Charles ran away and Camilla went silent. We nearly couldn’t care less about Charles after what he had done, but Camilla was a hard pill to swallow.

Me and Francis tried everything we could for a good while, brought her to the best psychiatrist, and we stayed with her patiently. Until she finally spoke to us again. But only a few words, she kindly asked us to leave her alone to deal with her grief, Henry or Charles, we never knew. We understood and left her alone like she asked. We tried our best to get our friend back and figured that she would contact us if she wanted to.

—

Me and Francis kept in touch over the years, calls and visits were engraved in our daily routines. He visited me in Chicago and I visited him in Boston. I analyzed literature and sometimes gave lessons in big named schools. Francis wrote detective books, he started writing them as a distraction and they blew up, people loved him. In the end, both of us were steady on our feet. I wasn’t in possession of a family fortune, but I became a bit wealthy myself.

However, there was one name we never dared to speak. Until today.

We were at Francis’s huge apartment, on the couch, whiskey in hand. We already drank a bottle of Irish whiskey. Suddenly he laughed to himself in a drunken manner. “What is it?” I laughed to myself too at his odd manner, the whiskey really managed to get in my head, I felt dizzy and floaty.

His laughing slowly went away and he stared at the maroon wall dreamily. “You know what I think about sometimes?” He looked at me with a sly foxy smile. “What if Henry never died?” I suddenly sat up and a little part of me was relieved that he said Henry’s name, he might have been drunk out of his mind but still. He knew Henry for a longer time than I did and his death was harder for him, he is also a sensitive fellow so that was not the greatest mix. I started snickering at his foolish question, but I stopped it when I saw his serious face, he was lost in thought.

“Francis? Where did this come from? We both watched him fall to the floor.” I tried studying his face, he wouldn’t look in my eyes.

“I know, I know. But those parts are so blurry, I barely remember how we got out of there. What do you remember from it?” He finally looked at me.

“Oh yeah, I remember every single little detail that happened. Especially the gunshot wound in my stomach and the blood oozing out of it!” He angered me a bit, the alcohol made the moment more dramatic than it actually was.

“Okay, I see your point…” He bit his lip, as if he was in distress. “What if he didn’t actually die? That was the last time we saw him and we got ushered out so quickly that we didn’t even register what hap—“

“Aren’t you a detective murder mystery writing novelist? Your mind is more creative day by day.” I point to his shelf, where he displayed the awards his books and stories won, in a joking manner. He was really good at what he was doing, no wonder everyone always begged for the new novel of his, even my students who I eventually taught from time to time.

He was not laughing, not appreciating my joke. I could see it in his eyes that he really was thinking. “Richard, have you ever seen him after that?”

“Weren’t you the one who sat through his whole funeral?!”

“It was a closed casket.” He shrugged.

“Closed casket?” I straightened up at the new information. “Didn’t he always say that he was going to have an open casket funeral?”

Francis’s eyes widened. “He did, because he wanted people to really see that all of us end up in the same way.” It was silent for a few minutes, until Francis turned to me. “Richard, if he could write his car to your name, then he could have had an open casket funeral. He wrote what he wanted for it when he was like sixteen, and the way he was looking at the gun?” We turned more serious by the second.

“Maybe he had a closed casket to spare Camilla?” I brought up my only explanation, but even I barely believed it.

“Camilla is not as weak as you think, and Henry was or is not that soft to change what he always believed in for a girl.” My biggest problem was that he actually made some sense, there was something about what he had said.

“So, let me get this straight. Henry may be alive and we didn’t think of this for five years?” I scoffed and turned to Francis. I put my hands on both of his shoulders and sighed deeply, as if I was a father who is about to tell a life lesson to his child. “Look Francis, I know that this Henry being alive and well alternative is way more sweeter, but it is not the truth and not the one we live in.”

“I know, but what if—“ He tried to interrupt me.

“No, no more what if’s… Henry is dead. We watched him shoot himself in the head and drop to the floor. You sat through his funeral, closed casket or not, he was in there. He is gone, Francis. Fuck… I wish he wasn’t, I wish we found a better way to deal with everything going on without anyone dying. I wish that Charles never came in with a gun in hand…” He had tears in his eyes from my little speech, maybe I did too, but I needed him to open up his eyes and see our sad truth.

He smiled sadly, a fat tear running down his freckled cheek. “I wish for anything that could have kept our group together…” he said as he stared into the crunching fire in the fireplace. I believe that in that moment he tried really hard for the first time to accept what we came to.

“We’re here now. Maybe up there, Bunny could give that goddamn slap back to Henry and even bang him in the head with his stupid latin diary.” I nudged his shoulder, trying to ease the tension. What I didn’t expect was a proper laugh from him. Half a genuine laugh, half a grieving sob.

“Yeah, you’re right… Thank you, Richard. For everything.” He lifted his glass and we clicked them together.

“To new beginnings.”

“To new fucking beginnings.”