theedumont:
like when you’re going to eat a slice of pizza and go to pull it off the rest of the pizza and ALL of the toppings slid right off of it because it’s so covered in sauce it has nothing to grip onto? or when your taco shell breaks as you’re putting it in your mouth? yes i know that feeling. wait, did you cause the fender-bender? or did someone hit you? and how the fuck did they manage to hit a stopped car at a red light? the only instance where this could make sense is that while you were headbanging, props for that by the way, that the light turned green and you just weren’t going so they inched up on your ass, which is rude, not knowing the distance between them and your fender and they hit you. i feel like there is more to this story Hailey and i am Emma and i want to know all about it now.
it’s exactly like that! the two disappointing food tragedies to ever exist, it’s why we can never have nice things. food always looks and smells amazing until it’s time to actually eat. no, i most definitely caused the fender bender and i’m pretty sure the girl wanted to make a bigger scene all because TMZ was right there. LA, full of people wanting to get their ten seconds of fame. it’s nice to meet you emma and i am more than willing to tell you every single detail from start to end, as long as we can do that over pizza or tacos. maybe the power of two food enthusiasts will make the food-tasting experience flawless.
mileycyrus: what has he done? do i need to kick someone’s ass for hurting one of my besties? tell me everything though, please.
haileybaldwin: supposedly boasting about how "much better" his life has gotten since he "decided to focus on himself".
haileybaldwin: either i'm a shitty girlfriend/fiance or justin has gone senile. but no worries.. i’m fueled by anger mostly... such an ass.
shawnmvndes:
[ PRIVATE: Distracted? Is that what we’re calling it? Last time I checked, when I’ve gotten into a new relationship, I’ve not been so distracted as to not return phone calls and actually tell the person I was seeing what was going on. I guess cryptic and irregular texts are much more fun. But hey, sorry to hurt you with the limbo comment. You were clearly torn up about it getting engaged two months later. ]
[PRIVATE: Oh, well let me give you some word of advice for any new relationships you may plan on undertaking, may I? I’m saying this so it doesn’t happen to you again. Maybe you should try embracing the relationship when asked about it, letting the girl know she’s important and is in fact, a girlfriend. It kind of prevents the whole giving her a bad image to everyone else ( in case she does find someone who isn’t afraid to show her off ) but hey, it worked in your favor of having you painted as the perfect crooning heartthrob who can do no wrong. Anyways... good chat, thanks for the concern. ]
miley: what an asshole, he turned out to be!!
miley: i'm so sorry that is happening to you though, you know i'm here for you right? but drinking out the bottle isn't going to find your answer henny, you're a wonderful female, justin is just an ass for even leaving you.
hailey: not everyone knows the meaning of loyalty the way we do.
hailey: i know you are, thanks honey. i'm not happy it's turned to this but i'm doing all i can to pull back out of this little drinking trend.
@haileybaldwin: sundaze for days... ☀☀
demi: as i always got you babeee
demi: i'd rather not be touching or getting close to him? cause i can't or i might give him some harsh ass words...you own five?! babe...i just need to kisskiss
hailey: can i offer him harsh words?
hailey: it's a deal babes. pick me up in 20? wear your best dress and i'll wear mine. 😘
James: At least I didn't sparkle or something
James: She's totally cute, what do you mean?!
James: Give me 5 and then it's whatever you wanna do?
James: you DID make it clear but it was thrown short when you got sick which is why I made sure you were okay, am I supposed to just delete your number?
hailey: And you better not start.
hailey: Send a pic --- of the dog, please.
hailey: 5 seconds or 5 minutes?
hailey: yes? you did your act of kindness for the year.
The last thing that you watched that you really hated, like absolutely could not stand?
I think it was the TV show on Discovery Network: Naked and Afraid? I couldn’t turn it off because it was one of those disturbing shows where you know you have to look away but you can’t because it’s too hard to believe it’s true.
@haileybaldwin: whatever trouble that you’re thinking, i could get into it.
demi: my beautiful beautiful hails.....UGH...YOU....ME????? TONIGHT? accept this rose????? my best friend 🌹
demi: kinda...wanna....😘 yes?
hailey: well well well, if it isn't miss lovato herself.
hailey: hi beautiful girl! best friend! I accept your rose!
hailey: let me guess... we need to fend off the weasel? you know i'm always down for it. 😘
shawnmvndes:
[Private: I know you literally just said it was a fender bender, but… head banging just didn’t seem like a great mix with any kind of collision, even a small one. So, are you okay?]
[PRIVATE: It’s why it falls under the category of an accident.. I got into one doing something I shouldn’t have been. I’m okay. No harm done, nothing I can’t handle.]