Gwayns - Dig In Your Heels

reblog to have this old man (he's like 20) on your blog <3

I am kissing him all over his face

REBLOG to kiss him all over his beautiful face

higurashi when they psync...

every girl remembers getting her first brick

(sorry that my first aitsf art is a shitpost)

oh no aotsuki's back at it again

ok now i really need to go prepare for my ap physics exam

yt link if you could give a like :D

Majima: Love, Suffering, and Dreams

I've still got Majima Gaiden on the mind and really need to ramble about Majima's mental state in this game, the emphasis on dreams and how they fit into the core of Majima's character and his arc in this game, and his relationships with Kiryu and Noah. Spoilers ahead.

When really getting into the meat of this character, something important to take notice of is of course the tattoo choice. To give a brief overview, hannya represent female demons who are driven by very intense emotions. An example of such an entity is the malicious spirit that manifested from Lady Rokujo's jealousy towards Genji's wife, Lady Aoi, in "The Tale of Genji". Bringing things back around to Majima, I often think of Yakuza 2. It's the game where we get the first look at his tattoo and in that game, there's a shot focused on it before he singlehandedly takes down an Omi horde. To bare such a tattoo is to proclaim to be driven by things such as obsession, jealousy, heartbreak, and wrath to the point those feelings overwhelm you and turn you into it a demon. The design of the mask is meant to appear as both dangerous and tormented. As Ugaki put it, Majima is overflowing with love, and he suffers for it.

Majima, as a matter of self-preservation, doesn't often wear his heart on his sleeve, but nonetheless accepts his strong emotions and the suffering that comes with them as a core part of who he is. In fact, the tattoo is him telling us that those feelings and suffering are what he's all about.

With all that said, let's take a closer look at his first encounter with the giant squid and the context of that encounter.

Years of unrequited love towards Kiryu, the devastating revelation of his cancer diagnosis, and a desperate attempt to find a, to Majima, likely not real cure are what led him to this moment. The interplay of love and suffering had reached its peak and appeared to be about to consume him in the form of a mythical-tier giant sea monster. When faced with this situation, Majima, against all reason, eagerly chose death. And I think this is where we see Majima's identity as someone destined to suffer because of love meets with the part of him that's "just a tough dude that likes to fantasize a lot" (Yokoyama's words). To a romantic who keeps their head in the clouds and embraces this sort of suffering as a core part of who they are, dying to a monster because they wouldn't stop fighting for the object of their one-sided love could appear to be the ultimate affirmation of that identity and their love. Majima isn't just standing his ground and going down with his ship. He's been stuck in a feeling of stagnation for years, as far back as at least Yakuza 5. The Tojo Clan is gone, and society has left the former yakuza to rot. And now he's been dealt the blow that he might be about to lose Kiryu. He's in a lot of pain. This was an opportunity to end it and go out with a bang for Kiryu.

But we all know Majima didn't actually die there. Through some miracle, the squid doesn't kill him, and he eventually washes up on shore after passing out on the ship. It's then that he meets Noah.

Majima finds a kindred spirit in Noah. Noah is preoccupied with fantasies of seeing the world while being stuck living a dull and sheltered life on Rich Island. He feels stuck and wants better and more exciting things. Just like Majima.

It's through helping Noah see the world that Majima finds the potential for fun and excitement in life again and two key things happen.

Number one is the second encounter with the giant squid. Before, the squid set the stage for giving Majima the ideal romantic death. The perfect ending to his tragedy. At the time, he was ready to accept that death. In the second encounter, nearing the end of the story, it's the squid that ends up dying at Majima's hands.

Number two is Majima's determination to not die in Madlantis. This comes after seeing Noah's response to Jason's near-death experience protecting him and Moana's kidnapping. To Noah, it was because his dad and sister love him and wanted to make him happy by helping him chase his dreams that they both got hurt. As a response, Noah was ready to condemn himself for having those dreams in the first place and throw them away. Majima was able to pull him back from those thoughts, but what would have happened if Majima had then gone and got himself killed after all of that? Again, Majima and Noah are kindred spirits when it comes to dreaming. Majima gives a lot of value to letting yourself fantasize about better and more exciting things. Noah throwing that away because he blames himself for somebody else getting hurt isn't something Majima can let happen and he's forced to consider how his usual self-destructive behavior could end up hurting the person he wants to help. In 0, Sera stepped in and forced this kind of consideration on Majima by directly calling him out before he could kill on Makoto's behalf. But the games that take place after 0 are indicative of no lasting reckoning with how his self-destructive habits could do more harm than good to the people he loves. In PYIH, he's able to think things through without needing another person to step in and talk sense into him.

Bringing it back around to Kiryu, there was a bit from the Anan magazine Majima interview where his connection with Kiryu was described as especially special amongst all the people Majima has encountered and connected to. He's Majima's dream. He loves Kiryu more than he loves anything else. While Majima was out there trying to cut in line to meet the reaper early because of that love, Kiryu was in the hospital fighting for his life to have as much time with the people he loves as possible after years of running away from them. What would Majima's sudden death had done for Kiryu? How would he feel if he knew Majima had died while desperately trying to find a cure for him?

Majima didn't find the miracle elixir he was looking for. He also didn't die while out looking for something he likely didn't actually believe to be real. No glorious ending to his tragic love story. No saving himself from still being alive to experience the pain of losing Kiryu if and when it happens. He just returns to Japan, ready to find new dreams to keep himself going, and he visits Kiryu to tell him about his recent adventure.

What would have happened if Majima hadn't lost his memories and then met and set sail with Noah? Would he have kept looking for that cure until he either found it or died trying? Majima says Noah saved him and when stepping back and looking at what took place, I don't think this is only referring to the helping hand Noah gave him when he washed up on shore.

Now that I put that all out there. We've got the former yakuza who is going through easily one of the worst moments in his life. He then meets a little kid going through their own struggles and finds himself able to deeply understand and relate to the kid. He takes up a guardian role to that kid, but he ends up being helped by them as much as he helps them. Oh, and there's this very familiar bit around the middle of the story where that kid is abruptly kidnapped. This is really starting to ring some bells.

Majima's story fuses the need to quickly adjust to an unfamiliar environment (the amnesia in a place far from home compared to Kiryu getting out of prison after 10 years not knowing what's going on) and the life changing encounter (Kiryu meeting Haruka who is just as lost and alone as he is) from Y1 with the death seeking behavior resulting from grief over loss of a loved one from Y2. Noah is the Haruka that's there to both save and be saved by Majima. It all rolls back around to rhyming with Kiryu and Haruka's story.

Anyways. Hopefully this isn't too rambly and disorganized. I really like to think about Majima's obsessive side, and I was really thrown a bone to chew on here with him maybe romanticizing those struggles. Trying to find romance or a bright side to your problems is a very real and relatable tendency people often struggle with, just probably not often on the level of "I'm gonna set sail and get killed by a giant sea monster for the love of my life". All of that interconnects with the sad love story with Kiryu, the focus on the importance of dreams, finding the fun in life again, and the parallels to Kiryu and Haruka with Majima and Noah. It's a lot to think about packed into this one five-chapter game.

btw I have full versions (R18!!) of these sketches and something more on poipiku or in my nsfw art acc on bsky :')

You say that no one appreciated you!? Bullshit! No one could stand to let you go! We never once abandoned you! It was all for you!