Vent

Vent

Haha I lowkey am only capable of feeling emotional empathy towards people in which I see a significant portion of myself in and it's profoundly impacting my ability to connect with people around me and I feel like a monster hahaha what is wrong with me (like I genuinely feel more empathy towards plushies than towards people).

Couple times when someone asked me why I don't eat meat I responded with "I have empathy" but I only recently realized that it's all just cognitive empathy. When I think about cows being raped to produce milk I don't feel anything, I just know it's wrong.

There's only a handful of people I ever genuinely cared about (two of which are not even irl but from here which feels pathetic) and it's blowing my mind that normal people just feel that all the time. Most of the time if I'm afraid of upsetting someone or accidentally hurting someone it's only because I am afraid of the consequences it would have for ME. Seriously what is wrong with me? This can't be just autism.