Greenmead-w - Wasting Time

ok so you support the disabled, disordered, and mentally ill. but are you normal when someone takes long to respond to you? or if they have a hard time listening to you? when someone has a hard time giving you their attention? or when their manners aren’t perfect? or when someone makes mistakes that may be obvious or simple to you? or when someone talks loudly or “causes a scene?” are you normal when people have to think really hard to explain things? or when they have a hard time putting their thoughts into words?

are you normal when people’s hair is unkempt or oily or visibly unbrushed? or when their face might be full of acne? or when they don’t have deodorant on for one reason or another? how about if their clothes are dirty? 

are you normal about disabled/disordered/mentally ill people when they make you a little uncomfortable?

me when the disability disables me: oh what the fuck? this sucks. what the hell man!

life gets better. dont get into jujutsu kaisen

Tiles! I want to have a kitchen wall full with different designs

Why’d they have to give my girl Sarah a destiny’s child ‘survivor’ poster :(((((

The fact that the government can say youre not too disabled to work while jobs wont hire you because youre too disabled is like pure evil tbqh

i no longer respect the hustle i want universal basic income and dignity for everyone

A personal vent - this is my experience and may not reflect other autistic experiences.

Approximately 16% of Autistics are in full-time work.

Approximately 32% are in some form of paid work.

I am in the 16%. And it fucking sucks.

"You are doing so well!" No. I'm not. I'm mentally extremely unwell and in constant burnout. But it's either this or being homeless.

"You must be high functioning then." Besides the terminology, it's kinda a no, too. I high mask. I don't function at home. I can barely take care of myself. It's all fake.

"Count your blessings!" No. This is a curse for me because I was late diagnosed and forced to live NT for 36 years of my life. I am not coping and I am not happy on an autistic level.

I don't go out, I can't watch shows or movies because I'm too exhausted, week-ends are barely enough recovery time, I'm in therapy that's holding the flood at bay just barely.

"You should just quit." I can't. We would lose everything and in the current economy my husband's income is not enough. We'd lose the house, the cars, the cats (which are like my children). And finding another job that pays me $29+ an hour for what I do isn't easy or a guarantee it won't be worse for me.

"You are so lucky to be able to work." I'm not. Please, my sweet dumplings... understand that I'm not.