I Am A Girl. I Am A Girl Because Everyone My Whole Life Has Told Me So. I Am A Girl Because I Wear Skirts

You heard them folks. Spread the love!

(And don't worry Zee, we're just happy you are helping out this community and making us all feel welcome 🥰)

I'm not sure which of your blogs I should put this in, but whenever you comment on my pictures for the Rise April Challange, it really makes me happy to the moon! And it feels like I'm not wasting my time either. Thank you so much for hosting this challenge and letting everyone see each others work! Before I downloaded tumbler, I really didn't know there were so many more fans for the show out there. I really feel like I belong here. I love everyone's art and stories, and I really hope we can save Rise as a community! Thank you again, so, so much! ❤🧡💙💜🐢

Lol. All joking aside though, thank you for participating. And I want to support as many people as I can. I’m tired of toxic fandoms. I saw we invite people in, treat each other with respect, help each other out. And I’m happy you found a community! We all need a place to belong!

Keep up the great work! Sorry I’m not getting to them fast enough! I have so much stupid homework to do!

The Love of a Clan

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Ao3 Link

Cassandra loved the Foot Clan, so it hurt when she realized that they didn't love her back.

Or, Cassy was in a cult, and we don't talk about that enough.

-

Once the mast-  

Once the Shredder had been defeated, Cassandra had offered to help rebuild the Hamatos’ home, with a complete willingness to do so. It was only right that she attempted to undo the damage she had such a large part in causing.  

She just... hadn’t expected them to take her up on the offer. But the small rat, who appeared to be the Clan Leader, had smiled and accepted her offer, even if the rest of his clan had looked reluctant to allow it. 

So, Cassandra had followed them to the ruins of their old home and helped them pick through the rubble to find the most important parts of their lives, even if the things they found were more often just as destroyed.

Cassy recalled seeing the blue Hamato pulling at an acoustic guitar with a snapped neck out of a pile of rubble, with a weak look of devastation. Then he glanced at Cassy and broke into a cheesy stand-up routine filled with music puns. She ignored any diggs he threw her way after that. 

She had seen the youngest of the Clan staring at a wall with a hole big enough for a car to drive through. It must have once been covered in a huge mural, as she could see oranges and reds leaking out around the edges of the hole. The turtle had just stared, wrapping his arms around himself in something like a hug. Cassy had tried to place a hand on his shoulder, but he had stepped back before she had even touched him. He had flashed her an open, friendly, and unconvincing smile and she had run off looking for another job that needed doing.

The purple turtle had been the worst. She had been with him when he found his room, broken metal and sparking current boards littered the floor. And in the center of it was a small turtle shaped robot, still and unmoving, its chest torn open and wires hanging out, like some twisted surgery gone wrong. It made Cassy feel horrified, even if she hadn’t known what she was looking at.

But the turtle hadn’t reacted. His face was blank and empty. He only said one word to her.

“Leave.”

She had, trying to not drown in horror and guilt.

She helped them relocate to another part of the sewers and had bought plywood and paint with the little money she had. She spent late nights cutting, and hammering, and painting. 

It hadn’t felt like enough.

- 

Cassandra leaned against the entrance tunnel to the Hamatos’ home and glared at the ground.  

The construction of the “lair,” as the Turtles called it, was done for the day. She wasn’t needed anymore and should just be heading home. But...  

Her dad was home tonight, for once, and she isn’t sure she can handle him right now. 

Before, she would have just volunteered for another round of training by the Foot or asked to go on a mission - even another humiliating coffee run. But that wasn’t an option anymore.  

But intruding on the Turtles’ new home any longer was also not an option. She could feel the awkwardness that was always in the air when she was around. It was growing steadily the long she stood there, even if the Hamatos weren’t around. 

She gripped the edge of her sleeve and tugged. There was nothing for it, no way out of this.  

She had to go home. 

The thought filled her with a hopeless dread. 

“Hey, Cass!” 

Cassandra jumped in surprise and swung at the one who dared sneak up on her and invade her personal space.  

The largest Hamato leaned back to avoid her punch and held up his hands in a placating motion. 

“Whoops, Sorry! Raph didn’t mean to startle you,” the red turtle said with a smile. “I was just happy I caught you before you left.”  

Cassy tried to calm her rabbit quick heart and stood up straight to make eye contact with the turtle, who was still far too close for comfort.  

“Your apology is accepted,” she said and forced herself to at least try to ignore how close the snapper was. “Do you require my assistance?” 

The red Hamato, Rapheal if she remembered correctly, shook his head. 

“Um, no not exactly. I was wondering if you would be willing to train with me?” 

“...I’m sorry?” Cassandra asked, confusion clearing her mind. 

“We just finished building the dojo, but my brothers are all tuckered out, so they don’t wanna come train with me.” He glared back down the tunnel in... annoyance? Cassy wasn’t sure, understanding others had never been her strong suite. 

“You... wish to train with me?” she asked, reluctance evident in her voice. Rapheal blinked and nodded. 

“Last time we fought you were able to throw me! Like a wrestler!” he said with an eggar, giddy look in his eyes that made the previous Foot Recruit lean back at the brightness. The red Hamato just kept talking excitedly.  

“The only other one who’s been able to throw me like that is Mikey! And he doesn’t like wrestling, he prefers fighting with his nunchucks. Which is stupid because-” 

“SILENCE!” Cassandra yelled, and then quickly slammed her hand over her mouth. 

Shit. She hadn’t meant to do that. She had just wanted to make him stop talking so she could think. 

She expected the larger turtle to get angry. All the higher ups in the Foot would have, hell, most of the other recruits would too. But the snapper just blinked in surprise, then his eyes widened, and took two steps back. His hands held up and his tail wrapped around his legs. 

“Raph’s so sorry!” He said, and Cassy distantly wondered why he constantly referred to himself in the third person. “My family doesn’t really have a lot of personal space, so we can forget about it sometimes. You don’t have to train with me if you don’t want to.” 

Cassandra cleared her throat and stood as tall as she could. 

“I would be honored to engage in combat with you again, Hamato Raphel. Please, lead the way.” 

Her new sparring partner shifted and blinked. 

“Just Raph is fine. Are you sure?” 

“I am.” She wasn’t lying. Fighting the Hamatos’ was always incredible. And Rapheal- Raph –always threw himself into his battles so completely, something she understood very well. 

Raph smiled and headed towards the dojo, with Cassy following behind. 

- 

Sparing with Rapheal was the best training Cassy ever had.  

The turtle was so strong that every hit felt like a wrecking ball, and the stances he made felt unbreakable.  

It was like fighting against a hurricane or a tidal wave. It would have been terrifying, if Cassy hadn’t happily returned everything the Hamato gave in kind. Raph was impossibly strong, and every blow she was able to land made her feel just as powerful. 

Weapons had been prohibited for today, so they often just ended up tackling each other and ending up grappling on the ground. Raph’s weight may have helped him here, but he wasn’t as flexible as her. They were evenly matched, and that just made Cassy fight harder to gain the upper hand. 

She had the snapper in a choke hold when she felt him tap out on her arm. She released her hold and fell to the floor, gasping for air. The turtle groaned and rolled over. 

“Water break,” he huffed out, and she nodded.  

Rapheal- Raph, be respectful. She reminded herself. -walked over to a beat up old minifridge in the corner and pulled out two bottles, offering one out. Cassy rolled to her feet and took the water. She leaned against the wall and slid to the floor; her sparring partner doing the same.  

“You have got to show me how to do that throw you used,” the red Hamato said.  

“I will happily help you learn any move I know,” she responded. “But I must request you do the same, your form is much more advanced than mine.”  

The turtle chuckled. 

“Uh, sure.” Both drank heavily and relaxed against the wall. “Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask, why do you always talk like that? You’re so formal.” 

Cassy tensed. 

“...I could ask you the same. Your habit of referring to yourself with your name is not common either.” 

“Yeah, fair,” the eldest Hamato admitted. There was a moment of long silence, where Rapheal shifted uncomfortably. 

“I was never very good with names.” Cassy looked up at the snapper, who wouldn’t meet her eyes. “I was never good with words in general. It just didn’t make sense in my brain. Why attach sounds to things? I did use them, but it felt real dumb to kid me.”

There was a soft smile on the turtle's face, as he spoke. Seeing it was like feeling a warm fire across a long room. Warm, but distant.  

But then the smile fell away, and the flames burned out.

“But then Donnie wouldn’t talk at all. He didn’t say a word until he was 4. And little me got scared and wondered if he just didn’t know any words, and so I tried to help him.

“I started narrating what I was doing out loud. Like: ‘Raph is building a tower out of blocks’ or ‘Raph is upset that he has to clean up.’”

The snapper let out a low chuckle.

“It was stupid. But it kinda worked. The first thing he said to me was that I talked too much. I was just so relieved that I actually tackled him. But, yeah, I just never got out of the habit of using my name like that. Plus, I think it adds to my charms.”

Cassy sat in stillness for a long time, then she looked down and pulled her knees up.  

“I had hoped that using more formal language would get my superiors in the Foot to respect me.” Cassadra admitted. 

Rapheal whipped to look at her. “

“Oh, dammit! I didn’t mean to bring up- I’m-” 

“If you apologize again, I will beat you to a pulp!” She said and glared, and his mouth clicked shut 

“...you don’t have to tell me more if you don’t want to.” He said after a minute.  

“No. I want to.” 

She did, surprisingly. Just that one sentence felt like coming up for air after drowning. Maybe it was just because Raph had shared with her first, maybe it was because he was comfortable enough to train with her, maybe she was just at a breaking point. But Cassy wasn’t sure if she could stop now, even if she wanted to. 

“I... hadn’t realized how much the Foot Clan had changed me until Shredder was defeated.” Her schedule was completely empty without training and missions. All of her “friends” had gone off grid. Even her closet only had clothes in red and black.  

“I- I thought they cared about me. They said they did. Or at least they used to.” 

“I’m sure they cared about you!” Raph said, aghast. “They were your clan!” 

“NO, THEY WEREN’T!” 

Cassy shot to her feet, the crackling anger of betrayal and the hot shame of being fooled finally breaking through.  

“'A Clan will protect and care for every part of itself. It will share its failures and victories. No Clan Member may have any doubt that they are loved.’”  

The words she had learned from the Foot’s scrolls flowed out of her without resistance. How many long nights had she spent reading and memorizing every ancient text the clan had saved? She learned every ritual, knew every rite of passage. Yet, she never seemed to earn those rites or rituals. Always falling short.  

“I used to train for days without rest! I trained until I couldn’t stand anymore!” 

She had pushed past her limits over and over again. She had practiced katas until she passed out from exhaustion. She had fought until she could take down even her instructors. But it hadn’t been enough. 

“I did everything they asked of me! I obeyed every request, no matter how useless! And never said anything! ANYTHING!” 

Cassandra Jones had loved the Foot Clan. She had given up almost everything for them. She had almost killed for them. She would have died for them.  

She loved them. 

“But they NEVER loved me!” 

A silence fell over the room. Cassy met Rapheal’s shocked eyes. They looked up at her with barely held back tears, and she felt her own grow misty with pain.  

“...fuck, they never loved me, did they?” She said, voice quiet and breaking.  

They had pretended to. They always told her that they cared about her, accepted her, and would always support her. They had said that they were her family.  

And that family had been something that Cassy had always wanted, always needed, and so she had fallen for the lie. Hook, line, and sinker. 

“I’m sorry,” the snapper said, voice cracking too. “Can I hug you?” 

Cassy hesitated, just for a moment. But all of her words had withered away, and it had been a long time since she had a hug. She thinks that she might need one. 

It was a very good hug. A long one too. But it was so warm and soft, and Raph’s arms held her in a way that was nothing like sparring.  

She wondered how someone could be so strong and so soft at the same time? 

But Cassy did pull back eventually, her face red from anger and embarrassment. She cleared her throat. 

“Apologizes. I lost control there.”  

The turtle just smiled at her. 

“Don’t worry. I’m glad I was able to help.”  

The turtle paused then sighed. 

“Listen,” he said. “Don’t tell anyone I told you this, but I’m pretty sure Pops is about halfway to adopting you. But I don’t know if it’s the best idea right now, and you probably need some time, so I’ll make sure that he doesn’t bother you with that.” 

Raph looked at her, open and honest, and Cassy wondered if his kind stare could possibly kill her. 

“But please know, if you’re ever ready to join another clan, you will always be welcome with us.” 

Cassy felt a small and half dead hope pulse in her chest. 

“I will remember that.”

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Thank you to my beta reader: @biconic-disaster25 Go read her writing, it's Great!

Beautiful!

Rise August Day 1: Mad Dogs

So... let's just pretend that I finished this on time and I'm TOTALLY not a day late on even my own art challenge, shall we?😅

Beautifully drawn!

I love this game, and you should go play it.

my take on the fellas

i imagine voice of the hero and narrator appearing like shadows, while other voices like or shadows or spirits bc they may be ghosts of previous mcs

and additionally voice of the meek bc i completely forgot about him

Day 24 and 25: Loss and Rebirth.

I think…that it took all four brothers from the future to save the past. Leo making the hard calls, Mikey opening the portals, Donnie and Raph making sure their brothers survived long enough to get them there..all so that the past can be re-written…so that love and protection can t transcend time…

@nickelodeon, if anything deserves to RISE from the ashes, it’s this show. Bring it back!

Voyeur needs to be seen to be believed. The scariest movie I have ever seen.

Voyeur needs to be seen to be believed. The scariest movie I have ever seen.

Rise April Challenge: Day 4 Dream

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Ao3 Link: Here

(Kinda streched the prompt a little, but I like it. There is some bad grammer but it’s on purpose.)

Raph knew it was coming, even before the jittering and zoning out started. There was only so many life-and-death situations his brain could take before it decided to take a vacation and leave him behind. But it was only when he woke up to find himself not in his bed, but standing upright in the middle of the lair, that he realized how bad this was going to be. So, knowing he had very little time, Raph began to prepare.  

The whole lair was raided for blankets, pillows, and cushions to add to Raph’s ever growing pillow fort in his room. (It’s not a nest, not a nest, not a nest. Even if he stole sheets from his brothers’ rooms so it would smell familiar. It’s not a nest.) The kitchen is emptied of snacks and water bottles. He moves every single one of his teddy bears into the fluffy pile and he sets up a speaker to play the sound of running water. He moves the more important or breakable items on to higher shelves, or out of the room all together. He’s already. Now comes the embarrassing part.  

He decides that Donnie is the best one to tell. He won’t stress about it too much and will be able to talk the others down if they start panicking. Still, Raph sifts nervosity as he stands outside Don’s lab. He shakes his hands out and breathes as deep as he can. He can do this. He can do this. The snapper knocks on the door.

“Come in!” Donnie calls and Raph crouches through the door and into the dim lab. He crinkles his nose at the smell of metal and oil, and he squints at the weird light. The purple light always made it look both too bright and too dark. Don loved it, but it always confused Raph even on a good day. Which today defiantly wasn’t.

Donnie was hunched over one of the worktables with one of his battle shells, his arms half buried inside an open panel. He didn’t look up as the Raph got closer.

“Uh... Hey Donnie? Can... um... we talk really fast?” The genies looked up from what he was doing, goggle lenses glinting.  

“Of course, large compatriot. What’s up?”

“Uh...” Oh man this was not fun. “So, I’m not really going to be around for a bit.” One of Don’s robot arms pushed up his glasses so he could give Raph a worried look. “Not literally. I’m not going anywhere. And it's nothing bad! Raph promises. But I think I’m just going to go a little... weird? Soon.”

“You’re going savage.” Raph winces at the word. It is accurate, but it still makes him uncomfortable. It always makes him think that he could hurt someone.

“Yeah.” He nods.

“Do you need anything?” Raph waves his hand.

“Nope, I got everything set up.” He’s quite proud of himself for that. “But could you or someone just check in to make sure I didn’t do something...”

“Of course.” Donnie says

“Great. The key is hung up next to the door.” Raph moves to the door, but his brother’s voice stops him.   “You’re locking yourself in?” It’s so much softer than what he’s come to expect from his standoffish sibling. Raph’s shoulders raise straight up, and he freezes.

“Uh.... yeah. I’ve been sleep walking and I don’t want to wander off.” It feels like a confection.  

“Are you sure?”

No. He isn’t. The idea of not being able to get to his brothers is awful, and being trapped alone is way worse. But he can’t just go walking into the sewars. (A small part of him worries about more than just him getting lost. He worries about blood splashing across his face. He worries about bones in his mouth. He worries about dead brothers.)

“Yeah, I’m sure. It’s fine, Don.” Raph leaves the lab and hurries to his room.

-

Raph is warm and soft. He is safe and good. He cuffs at the thought and tries to sink deeper into the warm-soft-nice. This is good. He should sleep.

He smells something... important. Something that is also good. Raph snuffles around till he finds where it’s coming from. A thick blanket. He covers his face with it so he can smell it better.  

It smells twirling-acrylic-orange. Mikey. Mikey is good, very good.

Where is Mikey?

Raph lifted his head and pushed back the blanket to look around for his littlest brother. (Not so little anymore, but never as big as Raph. No, never. He never needs to be as big as Raph.) Mikey wasn’t there. None of his brothers were. That was bad. Bad bad bad. Raph needs to get them, to share this soft-warm-safe feeling with them and so they could all sleep.  

He gets to his feet and wanders to the door. He tries to shove it open; it doesn’t give. He grunts and pushes again. Not good, not, not, not, not, not. He wines thinks about breaking it down. He needs his brothers. But it seems like so much work and his brothers are safe. He knows that he just... wants them to be safe here. Is that too much to ask?

He returns to his nest and flops down onto his stomach. It’s not as good anymore.

-

Raph wakes up to something squirming against his side, and hushed words that are hard to understand. He cracks his eyes open and finds a familiar shell lying across the edge of the blanket.

The shell looks like flowing-glimmering-blue. Leo. He looks to his right and finds Mikey leaning on him and drawing in his sketch book, while talking with Leo. Two brothers, it makes him well up with yes-yes-yes-good feelings but where is- 

A voice cuts through his thoughts. It’s shifting-sparking-purple. He turns to Donnie who is sitting on his left with his tablet in his lap looking at Raph questioning. Did he ask Raph something? The snapper lets out a little grumble to ask what Don needs. Words are too hard right now.

Donnie reaches over and offers the eldest a water bottle. Oh, yeah Raph needs that. He rolls to his side disturbing Mike who yelps at the unexpected movement, he takes the water and drinks it. It tastes so good! Should water have a taste?  

He hands the bottle back to Donnie and looks over everyone. Safe. They are safe and good, and they’re here which is so much more good.  

Raph’s mind is worried about them being here. It says that they are not safe if they’re here. That them being here is bad. But that doesn’t make since Raph is here. And Raph can protect them. Even better than that, even if Raph can’t keep them safe, they can keep each other safe. Leo is strong and Donnie is smart and Mikey is kind. They’re so good that they could keep him safe if he needs it.  

(He won’t though, because he’s big and they’re little. No matter how big they are or how strong, they will always be his little ones. His. His. His little ones! He loves them, loves them, loves them-!)

Raph’s mind slips into the haze of pride-love for his brothers, drowning the worry. He lets Mike lean against his chest so he can draw and throws an arm over Leo’s back so he can feel him. He wants to tough Don too, but he knows that tough can be bad for his little brother, so he holds back. Raph can hear him tapping on his tablet anyways.  

He closes his eyes and just lets the overwhelming feelings wash over him but doesn’t go back to sleep. He doesn’t need to. He has his family all around him, safe and good. He doesn’t need to fight or run or even understand what is being said, he can just be. It’s the greatest dream Raph could ever have, and he doesn’t want to miss a second.

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Please check out @zee-rambles who came up with this challenge.  Also take a look at @rise-april-art-challenge​ for more submissions. Please give feedback if I need to work on something.

The expressions! The way you can feel the cold!

I love this art! It was my inspiration for Day 13 of Rise April! (Along with my own experience.)

Just look at it!!!!!

Sometimes you just have to sit down under the rain, and let the drops run over your body. Just like warm tears, let them heal wounds and ease the pain. Let them wash away the blood that you had to shed and soothe the broken heart.

Rise April Challenge: Master Post

Ao3 Link, if you would like: Here

April O’Neil - April meets a strange turtle. Turtle Tots, Fluff,

Competiton - Leo won’t listen to his twin, not even when he is hurt. Hurt/Comfort, Disaster Twins,

Casey & Casey Jr - A mother and a son meet for the first time. Angst, Hurt/Comfort, !TW!

Dream - Raph goes savage if he is under a lot of stress, and he always worries about hurting someone. His brothers know he won’t. Angst, Fluff,

Bottle - Donnie is not having a good time. Autistic Overload, Angst, !TW!

Professor - Skipped

Nonsense - Mikey has a concussion, Leo helps him. Fluffy, Weird, Hurt/Comfort, 

Boom - Donnie finds himself in a minefield. Angst, Tension,

Style - Leo takes Casey Jr shopping for new clothes. Fluff,

Reckless - Mikey sneaks out and Raph finds out. Angst, Fighting, !TW!

 Hope - Skipped

 Family - Skipped

 Umbrella - Boys have fun in a storm. Fluff

 Spar - Mikey finds a way to make sparring fun for Donnie. Fluff,

 Buddies - Buddy the Paper Ninja learns more about his friends. Kinda Angst, Fluff,

 Mask - The boys are acting weird; April finds out why. Found Family, Hurt/Comfort, 

 Cosplay - Skipped

 Sleep - Leo tries to fall asleep. 

 Baby - Mikey becomes the older brother for a day. Fluff, De-ageing,

 Chaos - Raph is sick, and something is going on with the others. Sickfic, Fluff, Attempt at Crack,

 Jokes - 4 times Leo told Casey Jr a joke, and 1 time he returned the favor. Fluff, Humor, Puns

 Father - Splinter realizes he's a father, it brings back bad memories and sends him into a dark place. Angst,

 Spooky - A random stranger gets the scare of his life when he sneaks into the sewars. 

 Rebirth -  Leo reflects on something that happened in the prison dimension. Angst

Please check out @zee-rambles who came up with this challenge and look at @rise-april-art-challenge to see more submissions by other fans. 

@nickelodeon Bring Back Rise