I STUMPED THIS STUPID GENIE!
(The answer was the great Bogariel Frogariel.)
the gang's all here!!
Tim, you wear eye-searing spandex on stealth missions.
Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.*
My cat: Father is...evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.
*slamming down two textbooks worth of notes*
"Now, let's start at the players handbook."
Anyone: Hey (asks about a special interest of mine)? Me: Becomes an unskippable cutscene
As she damn well should be.
I would just like to inquire why you haven't met the minimum requirements for the title. There is a complete and utter lack of charming and/or comically idiotic henchmen, the amount of remote and impractical lairs I've seen hasn't been so low since Jane Austen was at the peak of her career, there are no outlandish devices, schemes, and plots to take over a specific tri-state area, not to mention technology so advanced it raises the question of why you consistently battle a group of plucky teenagers with superpowers instead of curing cancer or something.
I don't know what kind of sham you think we're running here, but we are professionals, and professionals have standards. We don't give out the title of villain to any moron who sticks up a bank. We would kindly ask you to leave and not return.
some pride month humor for y’all