Crosshair Has Always Been Severe And Unyielding. It Is His Nature. You Cannot Change That. He Cannot

the bad batch irl headcanons: brainrot edition.

hunter

watches the boys, breaking bad, and basically anything with jk simmons in it

his top artist on his spotify wrapped was lana del rey and has been lana for 3 years straight

listens to self help audiobooks and true crime podcasts

stopped posting on tiktok because 30 year old moms kept commenting weird freaky shit

makes capcut template edits of himself

snap score is in the millions; his parents were confused on the questionnaire and instead ordered a thot son

tech

listens to playboi carti, earl sweatshirt, and ken carson. below them is classical music

never beats the “erm, actually” allegations. his friends turned him into a nerd sticker to use in conversations

reddit WARRIOR. his karma score is in the millions. he posts, no matter what, every two hours (schedules the posts if needed to). most active in the subreddits r/techtips and r/javascript

obeys the traffic laws in gta but if a pedestrian says some shit like “hey watch where you’re going asshole” he is CLOCKING that mfer

plays swipe games on tiktok religiously and will change his answers to fit better with the “lore”

watches jujutsu kaisen, has a tiktok collection dedicated entirely to gojo edits. despite that, maki is his favorite character

wrecker

his entire tiktok for you page consists of workout videos and cute animals

did the trend of tying a bow on the bicep and breaking it while he flexes

doesn’t know how to take photos of himself; watches tutorials on every social media he can find but still can’t figure it out

listens to bad bitch music. beyoncé, megan thee stallion, tinashe, doja cat, glorilla, nicki minaj, all that stuff.

comments “looked at my girl and smiled because she’s perfect” on a hot girls post

says “what the dog doin” all the time. all. the. time.

crosshair

serves cunt; serves all of the cunt

a back arching straight man; ur gay tote-bag carrying boyfriend

almost all his friends are lesbians. they take him to the queer/sapphic clubs and the chappel roan concerts

comments “why no one hating” on the most INNOCENT and PURE videos just to start arguments

is a biker boy but hates the whole “biker tok” stereotype and so he doesn’t go out on the bike anymore out of fear of being recorded without his consent

instagram notes is his main form of communication; he is an olympic ghoster

echo

his vocabulary contains “skibidi” “what the sigma” and “gyatt”

his most used “social medias,” in order, are pinterest, whatsapp, and tiktok

worked at a waffle house before he got fired for starting a fight

kpop fan. stans newjeans, tomorrow x together, and le sserrafim

the definition of “female rage”; also, indeed, serves cunt. not as much as crosshair, but serves cunt nonetheless.

has 13 daily hours of screen time. what is he doing for those hours? fuck if i know. fuck if he knows. fuck if his PHONE knows. (in reality, he leaves youtube videos playing all night and doesn’t even realize it)

A Bad Batch x Red Dead Redemption AU that’s been living in my head for a while 🤠

Omega does not like the names Hunter gave the horses

The Batch is a small time outlaw gang of brothers hiding out as hands on a dude ranch. Trying to leave their pasts as mercenaries behind them. Until they receive a mysterious letter that their long lost younger sister is being housed in an orphanage nearby. After an unsuccessful attempt to legally adopt her, they return later to break her out.

Now they’re all wanted criminals now trying to outrun the law as well as their past.

“Got a bad feeling.”

Here’s what I’ve been cooking up in the past month🙂‍↔️

Credits go to @highgroundanimations for creating 3 of my most favorite characters ever ( and thanks for letting me bring my vision to life 🫶🏻)

Tech would have been so excited to take Phee’s last name

except the problem was, the rest of the Bad Batch took it, too.

It started with Omega. She was out shopping with Tech for one thing or other when he introduced himself as “Tech Genoa” and she just got so excited and bounced up and down and exclaimed, “And I’m Omega Genoa!” And it wasn’t really the time to correct her, except then Wrecker picked up on it and he got so excited because “that’s right, we get a last name now!!” And they just run around the house screaming “Omega Genoa” and “Wrecker Genoa” while a flabbergasted Tech tries to find a tactful way to explain that actually only he gets the last name.

Hunter and Echo of course know how the last name thing works, but they also thinks it’s hilarious, so they start using it, too. First just as a joke around the house, but then it just kinda starts to roll off the tongue, and admittedly, it’s kinda nice having two halves of a name instead of just one. Crosshair thinks the whole thing is absurd, until someone new in town asks him which family he belongs to and he just scoffs and says, “Genoa, obviously,” and he started using it after that.

And that is why Phee came home from an expedition two weeks later to see a hand carved sign on the front of the Batch’s door that reads “The Genoas” and an extremely exasperated but endeared Tech.

Drop whatever you're doing and go read this incredible piece by @eclec-tech - trust me, you will not regret it! @photogirl894 just shared this in the discord server and we are all rolling on the floor over it. It's a quick read and it's so funny!

Canon

Season 2 Bad Batch’s wardrobe change has so many fantastic implications:

I bet Tech quit wearing armor first, man literally never wore leg armor, I fully believe that he just walked off the Marauder one day in his cute little vest and ignored everyone’s stares

Wrecker probably got jealous though and was like “Hunter why can’t I not wear armor” except he literally doesn’t have any other clothes. So Omega is like SHOPPING!!

Echo, frankly, was concerned, but Omega was so excited about it that he just gave up

Hunter, at some point, saw a red scarf and was like “…I like this. a lot”

Finding clothes that fit Wrecker was like IMPOSSIBLE. Hunter tried doing the alterations but all the seams ended up crooked. They really missed Crosshair for that part

Shopkeepers kept asking Hunter, “Why are you buying clothes for your droid???” Which made Echo very salty, except the shopkeepers were usually so mortified at their mistake that they would give the batch a huge discount (“this is just Pantora all over again” “come ooooon, Echo, you’re really helping us out here” “fine, but next time, I am worth 60% off!!”)

Omega, again, was VERY excited (“I’ve never picked my own clothes before!”) and the boys definitely got carried away making sure she had EVERYTHING (“Omega, come here and pick out a raincoat” “Omega, do you have enough socks??” “Look, Omega, this is a nice sweater, you like sweaters, right??” “How fast are you gonna grow?? That’s it, we’re buying jeans in every size”)

Not that they didn’t customize their armor before, but now that they are dressing themselves in civilian clothes their own personal styles really come out. That is when they discover that Tech is actually extremely fashionable, and Hunter is literally a mountain hippie man

Hera: Kanan, my friend is coming over.

Kanan: That’s great. Who?

Hera: She’s part of the rebellion. She’s a clone named Omega. When I was younger, she and her brothers rescued me. They were called the bad batch

Kanan *eyes twitching violently as he gets traumatic flashbacks*: the WHAT

imagine if Cal and Kanan met after the Purge

i like the headcanon that they were bros back in padawan days, messing around and giving a headache to everyone in the temple c::

finally introducing my Cadet Batch AU, in which the batch are all raised together :)