Bts Talking About Past Memories ♡

Kimetsu no Yaiba

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I think part of the reason why we

hold on to something so tightly is

because we fear something as great

won't happen twice.

LEFT BEHIND ─ kyojuro rengoku

✦ Kyojuro Rengoku  x (Pillar) Male Reader ✦ Not requested

 ═══ 𝖉𝖊𝖒𝖔𝖓 𝖘𝖑𝖆𝖞𝖊𝖗 ═══ 

 After taking Tanjiro inside and offering him some tea, Senjuro looked around for the writings his brother had told the Demon Slayer to find. Inside was torn and illegible, proving no help in Tanjiro’s search to discover more about the Hinokami Kagura.

Senjuro was visibly upset by the outcome. Tanjiro tried his best to reassure him that it was okay and that he knew what he had to do to become as powerful a Hashira as Kyojuro, but he continued to stare dismally at the floor.

He took in a deep, shaky breath and rose from the ground. “You needed to see [Y.Name] too, didn’t you? He doesn’t live very far away.”

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HAPPY 9TH ANNIVERSARY, BTS

hey dear <3 I'm fairly new to romance, so could I request ways to hint a crush? Thanks lots!

I hope this was the kind of thing you were looking for. If not, feel free to drop another ask.

How To Hint At A Crush

A finds ways to touch B, e.g touching their arm, fixing their hair, sitting close to them, lingering touches.

A noticed small things about B, e.g A thinks their dimples are cute, A likes the way they play with their hands, A notices that B scratches their nose when uncomfortable.

A noticeably relaxes around B, e.g speaks their mind more, physically relaxes their body, smiles / laughs more.

A takes any excuse to be around B, e.g going on small trips with B, offering B a hand with whatever task they’re doing, asks if B is coming when they hear about plans.

Everything reminds A of B, e.g they’re reminded of inside jokes, they see something and think ‘B would like that’, they often think / say ‘I can’t wait to tell B about this’.

Also see:

Reasons for characters to fall in love

Fluff prompts masterlist

Writing advice masterlist

Prompts masterlist

Kyojuro Rengoku icons~

𝐿𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑜𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑏𝑙𝑜𝑔 𝑖𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑢𝑠𝑒/𝑠𝑎𝑣𝑒 ♡︎

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Suga Lockscreen / Gummy Smile :))

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SILENT NIGHT ‧͙*̩̩͙❅ CL16

pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader ( she/her )

summary: Loss doesn’t need to be lonely, grief doesn’t need to be an enemy.

warnings/info: hurt/comfort, mentions of death — loss of a loved one, grief, crying, hugs/cuddling, the internal conflict of loosing someone during the holidays.

word count: 1.2k words

note: the 27th of december has not been the happiest time of the year for me in a while, so yes, this is kind of self-indulgent. this is also for those who have lost someone during the holidays (or ever). i know how painful it can be to put on that fake smile, to force yourself, but please don’t. cry all you want, feel all you want, don’t destroy yourself for things out of your control or that are no longer under it. you are not alone, you are loved and cared for, always remember that. ♡

snowglobe, a holiday special

DECEMBER 27th.

Humans are not forever.

It’s evident, plain to see, to experience, but then why love so deeply we yearn for infinity? Care so strongly while knowing its definability? It’s what makes you human, everyone says—loving people who give so much to remember, getting your heart broken by them because, at some point, it’ll be your turn to break one, two, a hundred hearts. 

They say a heart that's broken is a heart that's been loved, so you’re glad your heart’s broken. Even when mom’s not here to swipe your tears, hold you close, or tell you how to fix it—when she's not here to argue, talk it out, or stay silent—you're thankful she got to see you grow, see you fall, stand up, and succeed. She saw you fall in love and loved the man who held your hand.

Said man must be near—Charles must be somewhere near; you can hear heavy breaths leaving his lips every now and then, something he does when he’s overthinking. It’s strange, you think. Perhaps he’s become such a recognizable character in your life that it’s instinct to hear it, or, more realistically, the small sound assumes spotlight because of the silence embracing your apartment. You don’t know, and you don’t think further about it. It’s just Charles.

You think about the time lost, not knowing how long you’ve been here, cuddled on the beige couch in your living room as memories of your mom submerge your mind. You stare at the half-drunk cup of hot chocolate settled on the coffee table; it seems cold now. That’s a way to ensure time has passed.

Your slight change of focus leaves the dissipation of heavy breaths unnoticed. Now you hear their replacement, gentle steps that grow louder until they stop before you, crouching until green eyes meet yours. Charles looks beautiful. The dim lights of the fake fireplace and Christmas tree caress his features. His eyes don’t look as green, but a warmer color. He smiles close-mouthed, taking your hand in his, and you let yourself smile back.

He doesn’t talk, understanding you well enough to know you don't want to talk at all. His thumb starts making shapes on your skin, memories taking you back to that night a year ago, when Charles drove you home from the hospital, his hand never leaving yours, doing the same shapes he’s doing now. You remember how, upon arriving, he stayed next to you until you finished one glass of water, then made sure you dined, how he helped you shower, and the moment he cuddled you in bed while you cried, muttering sweet nothings in your ear, his voice quivering because he had been crying too—he had known your mom for eight years by then. He called Andrea the following day, asking to be instructed in soup making and taking care of the two of you all day.

A lot of those days were faint, blurry memories, but if there's one thing you are certain of, it's that Charles never left.

Your eyes travel around the room, landing on a photo on the wall. It’s Christmas 2021, you and your family are all warped up in each other—it’s one of the pictures your dad lent you early this year, once hung up on your mother’s office. Next to it is one of a younger Charles with your mom and dad. It was taken a little over six years ago, the day you told them you were dating. It makes you smile. Your mom always loved Charles; even before you started dating, he was her favorite friend of yours, always so kind and funny. 

You’re about to travel back in time when there’s a small tug on your hand, turning your attention. Charles is moving around, sitting down on the floor. He looks up at you, then at the picture, he smiles saddened, the beautiful memory stinging as much as it does to you.

For the first time, you feel the need to say something, to explain yourself. But not knowing what to say, you say the simplest: “I miss her so much.”

He leans down to kiss your hand. “I know, baby, I know."

Silence falls over you once again, and the necessity to talk vanishes. You look back at the gallery, now focusing on the same type of picture as before, but it's a younger you with Charles, his mom, and brothers; there’s a bed between you and Charles, Hervé Leclerc smiling at the camera. There's writing on its frame: May 2017. You look at Charles, a small tear tempting to fall but a smile on his lips. You lean down to kiss his cheek, letting him know that it’s alright to cry. He brings you closer, kissing your lips—small pecks over and over again.

He stops, briefly glancing at the other two photos hanging on the wall, one of Charles' family and another of the two of you, promise rings on your hands, smiling at the camera. You think about your families, about you, and about how it's been a year since your mom left, and you still want to tear the world apart. A newfound feeling spreads across your body: guilt. Guilt of spending your night consumed by dread and grief, letting Charles fall into it.

You hate this feeling. 

Charles let’s go of your face, cupping your hands together with his. You know he sensed the change; his big green eyes are asking questions you don’t want to answer. You want everything to stop hurting, the memories to stay happy, and the bittersweet taste on your tongue to be eradicated.

He waits, and you break. “I want it to stop,” you mumble. “I want the pain to go away; I don’t want to think about it. I want to go back and not feel like I did on the 24th, like I wanted to run away and cry in my room for hours. I don’t know how to deal with this, Charles; this is too much. I can’t, can't do it.”

The buildup is too much, your breathing is heavy and fast. Charles hurries towards you, his hands hovering over your frame. “No, non, bébé, I’m here; you know I’m here, just like you are always here for me,” he hesitates, but charges through. “Someone once told me that it’s okay to feel sad, it’s okay to cry, to, to grieve. She told me: Grief is part of love, never hold back from loving.”

And you don’t know what to do or say. He’s cupping your face, looking at you so lovingly as he continues, “You told me that, chérie, so don’t hold back; even if she’s gone, keep loving her." He says, “You will slowly let go of the loss, I promise, I know how it is, just never feel guilty for loving her.”

It occurs to you at that moment that you haven’t cried in weeks, tears forbidden by a nonexistent rule, so when the first sob leaves your lips, there’s no regret over it. Tear after tear, sob after sob, your heart grieves.

Charles crawls up the sofa, bringing you to his arms, your head now on his chest, wetting the soft material of his shirt. You are about to care when his hand brushes your hair and back, and there’s no use in stopping it.

“Thank you,” you say between sobs.

“I love you,” he answers, knowing you do too.

i miss my mom so much

taglist — @smartstupyd @ziarah @nouvellevqgue @iloveyou3000morgan @carsgovroomm @goldenalbon @doofenshmirtzevil-inc . . . add yourself here

Character analysis of Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind by someone who really has BPD and its correlation with 8th house in astrology:

This movie is written by someone who has themselves had BPD. This I am sure of. When I watched this movie, it was like someone took my mind and made a movie out of it. Only someone who actually suffers from BPD and has gone through a similar situationship in life can write this story. Period.

Clementine is into witchcraft. She changes her hair color because it transforms her identity like someone with moon in 8th house. Her emotions are volatile, she is quick to anger and easily irritated. She must have inherited this emotional instability from her maternal bloodline. She has intergenerational trauma and psychological instability. 

She writes a lot of letters, takes Joel to Charles river, gives him a lot of gifts and makes his life so exciting because she has idealized him. She has a mental image of a perfect boyfriend and cannot see the real person in front of her. She projects the same mental image on every boy she dates. She repeats the same thing with everyone. She must have an absent or unavailable father. She wants a caregiver who will love her unconditionally. She forces intimacy on the first date because she craves union of soul and deep connection like that of a parent and child.  

This is why Patrick goes through the exact same storyline in place of Joel because Clem idealizes every person she dates, does the exact same things with them to PLEASE them so that they will not leave her. She has intense fear of abandonment and rejection. She brings excitement to life because she fears rejection. She constantly creates drama because stability feels scary to her. This is someone with 8th house Moon.

She idealizes every man who gives her attention, does things for him to impress him and please him, repeats same letters/drawings/dancing with everyone. When some months have passed she fears engulfment and boredom. She fears that now she has exhausted her supply of excitement. She is not fun and colorful anymore. Before the guy dumps her, she will dump him. Her sense of self depends on the guy she is dating. She purposely chooses guys with low self esteem and adds excitement to their life because she wants to control them so that they cannot leave her. But then she sees their flaws after some time that the man she is dating is actually a mediocre person with low self esteem and poor character traits. She has pattern of choosing similar guys. 

Out of sight out of mind. pwBPD forget people in a snap. It is like the whole relationship never happened. This is why they did not show Clem going through the procedure because her mental illness  automatically erases the whole relationship from her mind after she is done devaluing Joel. She has not gone through the procedure. Her mental illness BPD has erased her memory. 

Idealization, rushing into relationship, projecting a perfect image of boyfriend and relationship, intensity. Then devaluation, seeing the flaws in the person, fearing abandonment. Black and white thinking, extremely defensive, a lot of arguments. She has no self concept, no self image, no self esteem.   

She mentions “I’m crawling under my skin". This is Moon in 8th house. Intense emotions, so deep and so strong that you feel like you will explode. I have suffered with this my entire life until diagnosis.

She is promiscuous and has sex with every man because she feels like her only value is sex. She forces intimacy with men by oversharing every single embarrassing thing with them and having sex with them so that they won’t leave her. She wants security and stability in her life. Which is why when Joel says “my life is not that interesting. I go to work come home", she licks her lips because she wants this stability, consistency, pillar of strength in her life to hold her through the storm and chaos in her life. She tells him that when she was young she wanted to transform her girl doll so that it would magically transform her and then she says “never leave me". She has no self image. She is intentionally creating intimacy and self pity so that Joel will feel like a caregiver. Joel feels like a man, strong, protective. She wants this rock figure in her life. Clem has an endless pit of emotional needs that no man ever can satisfy.    

Notice how Joel says “I met this girl Clementine, she is amazing”, “I thought you were nuts but you were exciting", “I love you", “How cool I am attracted to someone’s back”, “and then you just took it without waiting for an answer. It was like we were already lovers", "you are lucky you have Clementice. She is cool". These are not the words of Joel. I repeat. These are not the words of Joel. Clementine is doing maladaptive daydreaming. She has MDD disorder. She is thinking these words about herself from Joel's POV because she can only see herself in relation to someone else. She has no self identity at all. She feels invisible, like a void unless she is being seen by someone else like an audience. Clem is thinking these things about herself in her daydream. She wants to be praised. She wants to be seen and appreciated.

This whole movie might just be her Maladaptive Daydreaming episode. Perhaps this whole movie is just an MDD thing. This is why they add science to it because Clem is daydreaming the whole movie and making things up. MDD coexists with BPD. The person cannot distinguish between real life and fantasy. They are so engrossed in it. They repeat the same scene until perfection. They especially repeat the “good" scenes many times because it gives them kick and rush.

Notice how the same scene is repeated many times in the end? This is because Clementine is doing maladaptive daydreaming. A maladaptive daydreamer repeats the same story in her head 100 times again and again like mad. It gives her dopamine. This is a compulsion. She is addicted to it. The “science" involved in this movie is not real. Clem is daydreaming everything and making things up.  

Clem also has a drinking problem.

This whole movie is a MDD episode of a person with BPD. I have daydreamed similar love stories in my head throughout my childhood, teenage and early 20s and then I went through a similar situationship. Then I was diagnosed with BPD. After which I found out I am gifted in astrology, occult. I have calmed down now and have done deep soul searching and have a self concept. I have treated my BPD to a large extent.  

Notice how every guy in the movie has had some relationship with Clementine? Clem idealizes men. She is daydreaming that all these men desire her, want her, everybody loves her, she is so cool and different. She wants to be loved and fucked by every man because they gives her security, validation, safety, self confidence.

Notice how Joel is already in relationship with Naomi? The other girl in the movie who is receptionist is in love with Howard who is married? This proves that not only Clem but even the receptionist also has BPD. Girls with BPD are intensely attracted to committed men because it gives them a sense of stability, caregiver, protection, father figure, rock figure. When I was 5 or so, I used to fancy marrying/dating men who were 50+

Notice how Clem and Joel are near the sea and Clem is jumping like a child while Joel walks beside her like a father figure? This is a fantasy in Clem's mind. She sees herself as a little girl. She has not grown up. This is why she is so exciting because she is literally a child mentally. This is why they also show them going to Joel's childhood because both of them are stuck in their childhood trauma and never grew up past it. Childhood traumas are signs of 8th house. Both of them are doing shadow work. They hate each other by the end of relationship because this is a karmic relationship to reveal their shadows to them.

When these people erase Joel's memory, Clem is daydreaming it all happening. Notice how the receptionist girl only talks about Howard? Because she is obsessed with him. She also has BPD. But she flirts and has sex with this computer guy because she wants validation, attention but she idealized Howard in her mind. While Howard has a messed up married life, she cannot see that because she only thinks in all perfect/all bad worldview.

Clem has an emotional meltdown where she feels like her skin is coming off and she is getting old. Nothing makes any sense. She cannot distinguish between feelings and facts.

Clem gets offended whenever Joel says something against her. She gets extremely defensive and insults him. She fears rejection and criticism. She also makes double braids because she is a child emotionally. She is impulsive and takes decision without thinking anything.

I can go on and on. But this is it for now.

you’re the one i love

Pairing: Jungkook x (ft.) Reader

Genre/Tags: angst, hurt/comfort, breaking up, sad but hopeful ending? i’d like to think it is.

Chapter Word count: 2.7k

Summary: this is about you and jeongguk after a breakup and you’re returning each other’s belongings through soft, yearning letters

A/N: i read the book why we broke up by daniel handler years ago when i was still in college, trying to move forward from a really hurtful breakup. this small fic is inspired by that because, i don’t really know, sometimes i like making myself hurt and cry. this is written in both y/n and jeongguk’s perspectives so you may interpret this (especially the ending) however you like, but please be kind, this story took a lot out of me and by extension, a literal piece of my heart. there’s also a sort of familiar kdrama scene in one of the letters, let me know if you spot it! as always, thank you for reading and please let me know what you think or maybe chat me up in the ask box :)

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