Posting My First Kagehina Fic In A Few Mins!!!!

Character analysis of Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind by someone who really has BPD and its correlation with 8th house in astrology:

This movie is written by someone who has themselves had BPD. This I am sure of. When I watched this movie, it was like someone took my mind and made a movie out of it. Only someone who actually suffers from BPD and has gone through a similar situationship in life can write this story. Period.

Clementine is into witchcraft. She changes her hair color because it transforms her identity like someone with moon in 8th house. Her emotions are volatile, she is quick to anger and easily irritated. She must have inherited this emotional instability from her maternal bloodline. She has intergenerational trauma and psychological instability. 

She writes a lot of letters, takes Joel to Charles river, gives him a lot of gifts and makes his life so exciting because she has idealized him. She has a mental image of a perfect boyfriend and cannot see the real person in front of her. She projects the same mental image on every boy she dates. She repeats the same thing with everyone. She must have an absent or unavailable father. She wants a caregiver who will love her unconditionally. She forces intimacy on the first date because she craves union of soul and deep connection like that of a parent and child.  

This is why Patrick goes through the exact same storyline in place of Joel because Clem idealizes every person she dates, does the exact same things with them to PLEASE them so that they will not leave her. She has intense fear of abandonment and rejection. She brings excitement to life because she fears rejection. She constantly creates drama because stability feels scary to her. This is someone with 8th house Moon.

She idealizes every man who gives her attention, does things for him to impress him and please him, repeats same letters/drawings/dancing with everyone. When some months have passed she fears engulfment and boredom. She fears that now she has exhausted her supply of excitement. She is not fun and colorful anymore. Before the guy dumps her, she will dump him. Her sense of self depends on the guy she is dating. She purposely chooses guys with low self esteem and adds excitement to their life because she wants to control them so that they cannot leave her. But then she sees their flaws after some time that the man she is dating is actually a mediocre person with low self esteem and poor character traits. She has pattern of choosing similar guys. 

Out of sight out of mind. pwBPD forget people in a snap. It is like the whole relationship never happened. This is why they did not show Clem going through the procedure because her mental illness  automatically erases the whole relationship from her mind after she is done devaluing Joel. She has not gone through the procedure. Her mental illness BPD has erased her memory. 

Idealization, rushing into relationship, projecting a perfect image of boyfriend and relationship, intensity. Then devaluation, seeing the flaws in the person, fearing abandonment. Black and white thinking, extremely defensive, a lot of arguments. She has no self concept, no self image, no self esteem.   

She mentions “I’m crawling under my skin". This is Moon in 8th house. Intense emotions, so deep and so strong that you feel like you will explode. I have suffered with this my entire life until diagnosis.

She is promiscuous and has sex with every man because she feels like her only value is sex. She forces intimacy with men by oversharing every single embarrassing thing with them and having sex with them so that they won’t leave her. She wants security and stability in her life. Which is why when Joel says “my life is not that interesting. I go to work come home", she licks her lips because she wants this stability, consistency, pillar of strength in her life to hold her through the storm and chaos in her life. She tells him that when she was young she wanted to transform her girl doll so that it would magically transform her and then she says “never leave me". She has no self image. She is intentionally creating intimacy and self pity so that Joel will feel like a caregiver. Joel feels like a man, strong, protective. She wants this rock figure in her life. Clem has an endless pit of emotional needs that no man ever can satisfy.    

Notice how Joel says “I met this girl Clementine, she is amazing”, “I thought you were nuts but you were exciting", “I love you", “How cool I am attracted to someone’s back”, “and then you just took it without waiting for an answer. It was like we were already lovers", "you are lucky you have Clementice. She is cool". These are not the words of Joel. I repeat. These are not the words of Joel. Clementine is doing maladaptive daydreaming. She has MDD disorder. She is thinking these words about herself from Joel's POV because she can only see herself in relation to someone else. She has no self identity at all. She feels invisible, like a void unless she is being seen by someone else like an audience. Clem is thinking these things about herself in her daydream. She wants to be praised. She wants to be seen and appreciated.

This whole movie might just be her Maladaptive Daydreaming episode. Perhaps this whole movie is just an MDD thing. This is why they add science to it because Clem is daydreaming the whole movie and making things up. MDD coexists with BPD. The person cannot distinguish between real life and fantasy. They are so engrossed in it. They repeat the same scene until perfection. They especially repeat the “good" scenes many times because it gives them kick and rush.

Notice how the same scene is repeated many times in the end? This is because Clementine is doing maladaptive daydreaming. A maladaptive daydreamer repeats the same story in her head 100 times again and again like mad. It gives her dopamine. This is a compulsion. She is addicted to it. The “science" involved in this movie is not real. Clem is daydreaming everything and making things up.  

Clem also has a drinking problem.

This whole movie is a MDD episode of a person with BPD. I have daydreamed similar love stories in my head throughout my childhood, teenage and early 20s and then I went through a similar situationship. Then I was diagnosed with BPD. After which I found out I am gifted in astrology, occult. I have calmed down now and have done deep soul searching and have a self concept. I have treated my BPD to a large extent.  

Notice how every guy in the movie has had some relationship with Clementine? Clem idealizes men. She is daydreaming that all these men desire her, want her, everybody loves her, she is so cool and different. She wants to be loved and fucked by every man because they gives her security, validation, safety, self confidence.

Notice how Joel is already in relationship with Naomi? The other girl in the movie who is receptionist is in love with Howard who is married? This proves that not only Clem but even the receptionist also has BPD. Girls with BPD are intensely attracted to committed men because it gives them a sense of stability, caregiver, protection, father figure, rock figure. When I was 5 or so, I used to fancy marrying/dating men who were 50+

Notice how Clem and Joel are near the sea and Clem is jumping like a child while Joel walks beside her like a father figure? This is a fantasy in Clem's mind. She sees herself as a little girl. She has not grown up. This is why she is so exciting because she is literally a child mentally. This is why they also show them going to Joel's childhood because both of them are stuck in their childhood trauma and never grew up past it. Childhood traumas are signs of 8th house. Both of them are doing shadow work. They hate each other by the end of relationship because this is a karmic relationship to reveal their shadows to them.

When these people erase Joel's memory, Clem is daydreaming it all happening. Notice how the receptionist girl only talks about Howard? Because she is obsessed with him. She also has BPD. But she flirts and has sex with this computer guy because she wants validation, attention but she idealized Howard in her mind. While Howard has a messed up married life, she cannot see that because she only thinks in all perfect/all bad worldview.

Clem has an emotional meltdown where she feels like her skin is coming off and she is getting old. Nothing makes any sense. She cannot distinguish between feelings and facts.

Clem gets offended whenever Joel says something against her. She gets extremely defensive and insults him. She fears rejection and criticism. She also makes double braids because she is a child emotionally. She is impulsive and takes decision without thinking anything.

I can go on and on. But this is it for now.

Fanfic writers really said "in any universe, in any scenario, despite any obstacle, these people would love each other" and I think that's very cool of us

Banana Fish Wallpapers 😭💛

(Wallpaper Made by me)

Like or Reblog if you save :)

guren really went from "don't you fucking touch me shinya" to "don't you fucking touch shinya" huh.

I think part of the reason why we

hold on to something so tightly is

because we fear something as great

won't happen twice.

-on alternate timelines and universes

everything everywhere all at once/ @inanotherunivrse/ complex- katie gregson-macleod/ @tiredbtw/ @loviely/ eternal sunshine of the spotless mind/ @death-born-aphrodite

cynosure. (profiles)

─── character profiles !

summary; you and xiao are genmates under the famed streamer company genshin impact. the chemistry between the two of you is undeniable, and your fanbases absolutely love your collaborations. but when you both start meeting up offline more and more, your connection starts to deepen past just harmless flirting and playful banter. with these real feelings starting to affect both your job and reputation online, how will you two react when your relationship becomes the internet's cynosure?

au guide.┃masterlist.

genshin impact liyue gen 3 !

y/n's gang !

xiao's gang !

spam accounts !

facts !!

yantao is canon in this au :D

hu tao's website (on her spam acc) isn't even a proper site about her, it's literally just a looping clip of her white pet cat jumping onto the camera, much like how a ghost would jumpscare you. she sends the link whenever someone asks for anything, hu tao claims it's the new rick roll.

honestly xiao doesn't even know what's going on in his friend group half the time, they're always up to mischief with the exception of zhongli, who doesn't cause chaos but is rather dragged along with everyone else to it. xiao claims childe and venti are loud and irritating, especially when aether is enabling them, but he'll never admit how much he actually treasures them.

gen 3 is the most recent generation to debut from genshin impact (see guide for more details), hence the lower follower count in comparison to other genshin streamers. in fact, at the time of this story, they've just debuted! however they still have a very high follower count namely because of the popularity associated with the genshin impact name, so they've already got a relatively large fanbase.

it was hu tao's idea to have matching pfp's for their spam accs! they basically used the pics from their fan accounts who had edited it for other fans to use 💀 unfortunately nobody had made one for y/n yet 💔 you were so offended (/j) by that you literally used matching pfp's with your main acc 😭✋

y/n's friendgroup is also very chaotic, even though kaeya's all the way in mondstadt, he still manages to do nonsense and tease everyone else. keqing and ganyu have their hands full and sometimes feel like babysitters when dealing with the combined power of lumine, kaeya and y/n HAHA

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a/n²; guys it is 2am and i just finished this AKDKSKD pls its supposed to post in an hour 😭 i played ddlc while writing it too LOL okok imma sleep now goodniteeeee everyone <333

taglist (open); @noirkkat @bookuya @ohmykazuha @glazelilyy @mika-zuko @oreoz-unfortunately @tiny-aroace @xiaophobic @test-tube @yanphobics @storytravelled @mirikusashes @ben6ett @oliviasslut @velionqs @bluexiao @lunachelly @aelatus @mimion

Kyojuro Rengoku icons~

𝐿𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑜𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑏𝑙𝑜𝑔 𝑖𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑢𝑠𝑒/𝑠𝑎𝑣𝑒 ♡︎

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Haha !! This killed me !!