Led Zeppelin - Madison Square Garden, 1977

Remember this guy?? Yeah... I wish I didn't. He's texting me and telling me how he messed up and how much he misses me. Literally, "I realize what I lost. You're so beautiful like a sunflower and I'm like a weed growing through the concrete." Exactly... That's why I found someone I can share the soil with, rather than someone who'll steal the nutrients from it. HE KNOWS I HAVE A BOYFRIEND. He unsent that shit at like 4 AM.

He texted me again the other week trying to come up with reasons as to why we never got together. Like "because you're a gemini and I always have bad luck with them." Yah it's totally not because you treated me like shit, lead me on, or ignored me?? He's blaming it on me... Not interested ✋️

ALSO I JUST TURNEF 18 AND HE WAS 27??? ew

Anyway that's my rant for now. I'm going to cat sit and drink champagne while listening to angry music

A little over a year ago, December 27th, I met someone that changed me. We met on a dating app, and it just went downhill from there. Me being the person I am, I ignored the red flags because he was cute. He mentioned he'd be going to prison and wouldn't tell me why. I ignored it.

By February, I was trapped. I didn't realize it. I was pregnant. I knew that next morning. Sure enough, the test came back positive. I balled in my car. I aborted it and he guilted me. I would never have a baby with him. Ever.

He did and said things to me that will always linger. I didn't feel safe anymore, but I couldn't leave. He threatened me and my family. He knew where I lived and worked. I couldn't hide. He was taken March 24th. I couldn't escape, even when he was behind bars. My heart would drop whenever my phone rang. I cried after every call. I couldn't escape.

A part of me thought he wasn't really in prison. That he was just watching and testing me. That he was waiting outside my home or work, just watching me. I would sleep with my light on and cry into my pillow. I constantly checked the inmate roster and answered the phone calls. It helped put me at ease, seeing legal documentation of his imprisonment.

I lost people I considered my best friends because I was in danger and being controlled by him. My family helped me gain the courage to ignore his calls. I thought he would get the hint... but he called from June - October. On and off. I finally blocked him. I got a protection order on Halloween, and it was approved November 7th. I was finally free.

But he's always here. I dream about him. He's either really sweet and loving, or really scary and violent. I spiraled again today and did a record search of him, checked the roster, and reread the protection order. I stalked his family on social media. I couldn't see straight anymore and sunk into my bed. I couldn't breathe and every horrible thing started coming back. I felt everything again.

My little sister knocked on my door and asked if I wanted to hang out. She saved me and doesn't even know it.

I'm safe. I have loving people in my life. I lost people, but now I know who'll stay by my side, no matter how hard it gets. I know who to avoid and what to look out for. I'm stronger now and I'm proud of my past self for staying alive through all of it. She was so brave, even though she was always in pain and terrified.

I'm sorry I changed, but not really. I'm better now from it. I'll miss how open and happy I was, but I'm slowly coming back to my authentic self. I'm slowly healing and getting better.

I'm scarwed. Voting rn at a school gym and oml I hope Kamala wins. As a woman, if Trump wins, I will pass away.

It's way too close for comfort

frozen: estelle chen for vogue china feb. 2022

My man don't know the freaky shit I'm into

Tiles! I want to have a kitchen wall full with different designs

Kelly Bastow, aka Moosekleenex on Etsy

On Tumblr

Robert Plant, 

June 22, 1977. I never seen the full set posted… So..

Led Zeppelin photographed by Chris Walter at Savoy Hotel, 1969.