Classic Issue Between Girls 

It's tough being a queer Christian because you have one vocal minority within Christiandom that wants to condemn you to hell and treat you like you don't understand your religion and on the other side you have another vocal minority of queers treating you like you are incompetent at best and a traitor and evil incarnate at worst. It's the wick burning at both ends of the candlestick.

i’m late af to do this but someone had to

Healthy Coping Mechanisms

Hello! I thought I would compile a list of healthy coping mechanisms for you all, but I also thought I would explain what coping mechanisms are and why we need them.

Just a disclaimer before I get started: I am a first year psychology student, I don’t know everything but I do know some and I have made sure to do my research before making this post.

What Exactly Is A Coping Mechanism?

By definition, provided by the APA, a coping mechanism is any conscious or nonconscious adaptation that helps decrease tension and anxiety in a stressful situation. In other words, a coping mechanism is a skill or strategy to help alleviate your stress or anxiety.

Coping mechanisms are linked to coping behavior and coping strategies.

However, one thing to note is that not all coping skills will work for you. The effectiveness of a coping skill is dependent on a few factors: the situation or the circumstances; the type of stress you are under; and you, the individual.

Why Are Coping Mechanisms Important?

They are not only important but necessary in order to help alleviate stress. Coping strategies also give an individual some sort of control in a given situation. If an individual does not know how to cope or they do not have coping strategies, it could lead to them hurting themself because they cannot process what they are going through. They may find ways to cope that are harmful to them because they don’t know how to manage the situation they are in. 

Example: an underage person begins drinking alcohol regularly to cope with their depression.

Also, having healthy coping strategies means that you realize the problem, and you want to fix it. So you’re taking active steps towards that.

What Are Some Types Of Coping Strategies?

Emotion-focused

Centers around the management of the emotions that accompany an individual’s stress

Problem-focused

Centers around gathering information about the source of one’s stress and then learning new skills to adapt to the problem.

Appraisal-focused

Centers around an individual changing the way they think

There are more but these are the main 3. 

Examples of Maladaptive (bad) Coping Strategies:

Substance use

Self-harm

Eating when you’re stressed

Avoidance

Lack of sleep or sleeping too much

Procrastination

Isolating oneself

Self-deprecating humor

Trying to escape the problem

Examples of Adaptive (good) Coping Strategies:

This is probably the part everyone has been waiting for but I wanted to do some explaining rather than just giving you all a list of good coping skills. 

Emotion-Focused:

Call or text a friend

Journaling

Write a letter to the person(s) who is upsetting you but never send it. You can do whatever you like with it afterward.

Breathing techniques (e.g.,  breath in for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, breath out for 4 seconds; breath in for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, breathe out for 8 seconds)

Appraisal-Focused: 

Write down 2-3 things you like about yourself and/or your situation, once in the morning and once at night. Or whenever you need to.

Write down positive or motivational quotes and stick them in places frequently go or look

Counteract every negative thought with a positive thought. 

Other:

Go for a walk

Do something creative (e.g., draw, paint, write, sing, play an instrument, etc.)

Blow bubbles (it may seem silly but it works!)

Read

Exercise or any other kind of physical activity

Puzzles (any kind, but personally I like ones that make me think!)

i made a quiz: what does your soul smell like? (friendship/ relationship compatibility in the results!)

aren’t all rats technically “rat bastards.” i mean they don’t have a concept of marriage

i think if i was dan howell and phil lester i would Never tell the internet shit about The Relationship and would not only keep everything private forever but continue to make content that blatantly references it without ever addressing it ever. like those men deserve that and also a million dollars from anyone who contributed to the unhealthy view the world had (and arguably still has) of them as a duo and as people

the boys are back in town

Please reblog if you think that “they/them/theirs” is a valid set of pronouns.

Trying to make a point to my father.

new aesthetic: no academia

-ignoring google classroom notifications

-wearing the same grey sweatshirt for days on end

-your notebooks sit in a pile on your desk, staring at you mockingly. you tried to study a couple days ago, to no avail.

-awkward silence that hangs like a fog on the zoom call

-your teacher emails you asking why you didn’t complete the assignment

-forgetting to shower

-pressure from teachers to be productive and maximize your time in quarantine, but all you can manage to do is stare at your phone for hours every day

-the isolation is driving you mad. it feels like a middle school summer again.