Like Phases Of The Moon, I Change The Way I See The World. Sometimes It's Too Much Yellow, All Bright

Do I wish for someone to look at me and think that I am the most beautiful painting they've ever seen?

Do I wish for someone to hold me oh so softly, afraid that they'll hurt me if the grip is even a little tight?

Do I wish for someone to think of how it would feel to kiss me, to be kissed by me?

Do I wish for someone to think of me when they see purple sunsets and orange dawns?

Do I wish for someone to tell me that they've been thinking about me the whole day?

Do I wish for someone sing to me and cuddle me to sleep?

Do I wish for someone who can't stop thinking about a beautiful future where we belong together?

Yes.

I wish that.

All of it.

But most days I wish someone would just smile at me.

Grab your dreams in your hands and sprinkle them while you take a walk. Let the others after your time follow the trail and find their own treasure. Because even if you didn't make it, at least they will. And that means you did make it. Planting hope in the depth of a soul is the closest that we humans can come to being gods.

I thought you'd turn back.

I thought you'd reach out for my hand.

I fell thinking you'd be there at the end.

But all that remained were ghosts of promises.

Perhaps I should've screamed harder,

when you left me there in the dark.

All I ever knew was your touch.

And all I ever did was wait for your return.

Silence lays above the trees.

But the storm within me rages on.

I need you to make me warm again.

A gentle touch of yours is enough to calm me.

Please don't go along now that you're free.

Every once in a while come by me.

Without your hot tears and quiet voice,

the bones in me are all lonely.

One by one they call out to you.

Letters of my name make up the loneliest number,

when you no longer whisper them at night.

It's always the sun in someone's eyes that attracts the night in their hearts

A million touches later you're finally here to stay.

Probably with a million more you'll finally fall for me too.

But sadly, we don't have so much time.

Maybe this is our last sunset together.

And when the light of the next moon falls on your pretty face,

I'll close my eyes one last time.

And just like that fade away with nothing but your name on my lips.

I look up to see his beautiful face.

His eyes are filled with fresh tears.

But there's a smile on his lips.

It seems so true and real.

Yet I know it's far from that.

When his voice cracks as he speaks,

a deep sadness washes over my being.

I can feel it spreading through me.

Touching every secret corner and creek.

I don't know what to do now.

Who do I take care of first, him or me?

I ask myself, as I hold his face with my shaking hands.

His tears are so warm as I wipe them away.

His smile fades and he falls onto me.

While he breaks in my arms quietly,

I let my tears fall finally.

There's only so much strength I have in me.

And I'll use every last bit to piece him back together.

Because I don't know how to be without him.

I don't know why I am, without him.

Without him, I stay a blue question mark.

With him, I'll be a warm full stop.

© Moonyloonywitch

poem and photo by pangarina-angelin-a

I listened to your song today.

Again and again.

Your voice is just the right amount of comfort I need.

The lyrics are words pulled out from your thoughts.

And I can't help but feel happy,

knowing I finally had a glimpse of your mind.

I think I haven't craved anything like this in forever.

Your thoughts are like magic.

It pulls me in closer,

and hugs me a little tighter.

Your thoughts are also like the night sky.

So beautiful, yet too far away to be true.

Music made by your hands,

blended with the sweet humming of your lips,

carefully speaks stories to the listener.

This is what a song should be.

Your songs are like ocean,

and everyone takes away what they can.

To be honest I hate that.

I wish you only sung for me.

I wish only I heard the sweet ramblings of your head.

I wish you wrote those lines for me.

I wish I could hide you from the world.

I am being selfish I know.

But I would gladly shout out to the world how selfish I am,

if it means you will sing to me forever.

I need your voice ringing through my bones,

until the universe disappears in the folds of nothingness.

© Moonyloonywitch

29/07/2021

10:57 am

Stop running and turn around.

I am still here, standing in the dark.

With outstretched hands waiting to hold you.

Come to me and please stay this time.

We found each other after a million sad stories.

Each one more heartbreaking than the last.

So come back and I promise I'll hold you.

Sleepless nights have been my friends for a while now.

But with you by my side, the world comes alive.

My heart is stronger this time.

Let me take away your pain and mourn for your loss.

Close your eyes and walk back to me.

For so long your were lost among the starless skies.

But now even the darkness is tired of keeping us apart.

I've littered stars to guide you back home.

Follow the fading lights and by dawn you'll be safe in my arms.

It's time for our forever, my love.

The ghost of your skin is still warm on my palms. Your scent lingering in the spaces between my fingers. My eyes are still on the last place that held your shadow. You've disappeared through the door that's still open. I can't bring myself to shut it, for fear that I might lose you forever then.

The moment stretches on and I can't feel anything except for this dull thumping of my heart.

It was a mistake to hold you so close and kiss you with love. And it was an even bigger mistake to hope that you kiss back. Mistakes that cut off our red strings of fate. And now, like autumn leaves in the cool breeze, our souls are drifting apart, blown away from the other to lands far from this place.

Calling this heartbreak would be cruel. This feels like death.

As I feel the colours in me drain away along with the warmth inside, I know you've killed me with your absence. Or perhaps your presence all along...

I know you will never return.

You won't ever come back.

I won't see you ever again.

And I won't see this me ever again too.

The sky is still sleeping outside. And soon the love in me will go to sleep as well.

They say empty vessels make the most sound. But the screams of my soul only come out as whispers against the silence of this dawn.

I've lost you and I've lost myself.

As the sky turns to a mixture of greyish pink, I stand at the same spot you left me. Wondering why everyone says love is beautiful, when it has been a painful poison all along.