I Am Just A Dog With A Thorn In Its Paw And Time Is The Little Girl That Finally Draws Me Out Of The

I feel like I'm beating a dead horse here, but MY GOD I don't think people realize how stupid other people are unless you've worked retail. Or, not even stupid, but they just believe the rules don't apply to them.

I'll give an example.

I work in a coffee kiosk inside of a grocery store which has two main entrances/exits and a third through our liquor department. Management decided that on weekends, the entrance (technically) in the middle would close/lock at 8pm, even though the store doesn't close until 11pm. This is kind of stupid to me, but I also see how empty the store is around 8, so eh, not my problem. The kiosk also happens to close at 8, and also also happens to be situated right next to the now-locked entrance/exit.

Between the kiosk and the registers there is open tile, though not really a lot width-wise. Management, in all their wisdom, locks the door at 8 sharp, and puts a dandy little sign in the middle of this walkway. I'm kidding about the little part - this sign is about two and a half times bigger than your common Wet Floor sign.

Notice earlier how I said the sign is in the middle of the walkway? That means that people have to ACTIVELY walk around it in order to continue on the the doors. Barrier 1, ignored. Now they are at the automatic doors, which are not opening. Because they are locked. This is when they really notice something is wrong. Barrier 2, noticed but ignored. Instead of looking at the paper, eye-height sign on the door that says THESE DOORS ARE LOCKED, they instead push on the automatic doors like that's a normal way to open them. Barrier 3, ignored.

My coworker and I are finishing up closing around this time, and we get to watch the fireworks. We could be kind, and stop these poor souls from getting too far in their fruitless journey, but after so many back-and-forths of

"Sir you can't go out that way, those doors are locked."

"Wh-But that's the way I came in!"

"I know sir, but now they're locked."

"Well that's stupid!"

"I know sir."

a barista gets tired. Eventually, either they get frustrated and walk away from the locked doors, or they turn to us and ask why they aren't opening.

This sometimes leads to my favorite exchange:

"Those doors lock at 8pm."

"Well they should put a sign up about that!"

"They did ma'am. You walked right past it."

Sometimes there will be a modicum of shame, but most of the time they just walk off. But the best part will always be when someone else watches this exchange go down, walks right up to the doors, and expects them to open anyway.

Humans are truly a wonder.

babe no of course your unsettling stare and random fits of prophecy aren’t ruining the function

they’re all just pissy bc they all have to go die on a quest now

you know those fics where S2 Jayce meets S1 Viktor and falls to his knees and cries, yeah, i'm normal about them

qpr sashisu speaks to me

I am squeezing them until they go pop

ALSJJDLAJF SO EXCITED TO SEE THE END RESULT

I need someone to draw this:

Odysseus, covered in blood, ragged and looks like death warmed over: *wearing a sash that says “most valid crashout” across it with Hermes/Athena bestowing a pageant crown upon him*

Optional skewered Poseidon in the background

revisiting my written storyboard for the twins and this song bc goddamn this got me in my heart

christmas eve posting ohhh yeahhh

we're still making up new popes and kings and shit in 2025. fucking embarrassing

BTW i see these posts all the time like "ohhh i dont know what to comment on fics.." and every response is "keysmashes! or hearts!! anything works :3" and thats GREAT!! thats helpful!!

but: consider. if u genuinely like analyzing writing.. do u know ur just allowed to go through and quote your favorite parts and ramble abt what they mean to u and the author will LOSE IT WITH HYPE?

genuinely. i felt SO WEIRD the first time i did it.. but like. holy shit authors love it. its crack for authors. the first time i did it, it was on a fic that hadnt updated in half a year, give or take, and the author made 3 updates that month BECAUSE OF MY COMMENT.

LIKE. as an author every comment is INCREDIBLE!!! but also, dont feel like your comment has to be short or otherwise ur invasive or smth!! authors ADORE long comments more than ANYTHING.

When your genocidal warmongering colonialist imperialistic buff butch milf wolf mom wants you to join your home country’s military industrial complex but you’re too busy being artdeco steampunk fenty beauty mogul diplomat goddess with a buff latino-adjacent boytoy who has a situationship with a sad eastern European 90’s heroine-chic machine messiah Czech hunter twink boyfriend

I love art that has Viktor is some sort of open back shirt bc it is beautiful and sexy but also bc he would do that

If he had to get dressed up and go to some gala to get passive-aggressively snipped at then you best believe he is wearing that open back

Because it makes his disability visible. It makes it beautiful too, but that would be Viktor saying Look at me. Look at this. Maybe it wouldn’t change anything, but it would make them uncomfortable, and that’s enough of a win, sometimes.

(Also it makes Jayce turn bright red every time)