I Wanna Run Away With Someone In The Middle Of The Night And Go On Adventures And See The World And Eat

~ Clouds and stars and scapes of blue always veil the thoughts of you. Something deeper than desire has fallen amongst us, yet I feel that the promises of forever will inevitably stumble into a void between maybe and never. But if had the choice, I’d somehow bind our chapters into a story. I’d peer into tomorrow and maybe witness your wish to stay. Yet a part of me dares not to disturb the door of fate (or maybe I am too scared of what I would see beyond it)。

_lostinmyreveries

“I don’t care where it ends, let it begin.”

—

i love studying. i love writing. i love reading. i love learning languages. i love doing mathematics. i love wandering over some particular sum and trying to come up with formulas to solve it. i love physics. i love biology. i love chemistry. i love history. i love literature. i love learning.

not to achieve the perfect grades ever. but it just amazes me that there's so much to know and learn and write and read about in the universe. my curiosity wouldn't get enough of it.

“i like every person i meet. for like 17 days. after that either they expect too much or give too little. expectations and expectations and some more. it’s not like they like me indefinitely. shall i put in the effort and emotion to get to know them beyond their superficial layers and see the love and the hurt and the humanity in them when they are just going to stop caring about my existence perhaps at day 67 or 172? Shall i pacify the devil inside them when it will laugh at my attempts when they walk away at day 213? shall i? or shall i just shut up and go to sleep.”

—

“You don’t actually fear the opinion of others, what you really fear is how their possible rejections might trigger your own somewhat unconscious dislike for yourself.”

—

So how do we improve your self-image? Well here is a powerful way:

Write an extensive list of short positive sentences about yourself and your qualities (non-grandiose of course) and then read them out aloud. If any one of them either feels really uncomfortable to say or conversely really amazing to say…then you basically know which ones to start with.

Now record them into an audio file, put that mother on repeat, track how much you listen to these affirmation each day, and also write down your experience and sense of progress.

And as to the question of progress…listening to affirmations may not immediately bring positive results as your subconscious mind might start to bicker with them for a while which may push uncomfortable emotions to the surface…but this is exactly when you need to keep going…for the inner resistance will gradually fade, I promise you that.

No poet could be just happy or their soul would waste away in starvation.

They live life with a mixture of pain, pleasure, confusion, ecstasy, love, heartbreak, happiness, sadness. They feel, think, and they weave these all together through the magic of their words.

“‘a hymn to the love that dares not speak its name.’ not for all eyes but just for those women who have walked soft in the dark dark light. i give you my praise - a song of many textures and moods.”  from the cover of pointblank times: a lesbian/feminist publication, vol. 2 no. 5, june 1976

Inst @rikkekrefting

Daydreams

I want to go on spontaneous adventures with you in all the possible places in this beautiful world of ours.  I want to climb mountains in the Gaiain alps with you far far away where we will be completely out of reach. Why is it that your presence is the one I crave the most? everywhere I go, all I crave is for you to be there with me. I want to wake up at 4 am with you as its you I'm besotted by. With you I want to drive down to the beach and watch the sun rise and shine its rays into those heavenly eyes of yours which never seize to enchant me. Just me, you, and the ocean. I want to sit on top of the roof in your embrace, and reminisce about the memories I miss and wish I could relive. I want to listen to you talk for hours and hour about the things you love, the things that make you happy, your dreams and aspirations. I want to hear all the things that make you feel uneasy. I want to have such a strong bond that nothing but truth flows out of our mouths. I want to be able to shower you with all the love you deserve, treat you like the most precious gem that you are, and be nothing but devoted to you.

Excerpt from my thoughts