We Are Only Seven - Chapter 1

Miss Havisham, the lonely heart.

Great Expectations (2011) BBC

Jin - Orange

2/7 (Check out other colours/members here)

My YoonKook 😭

You think I follow you around because I like you? I'm not worried at all about you. What is there to worry about for you? I'm the one who should be worried. But do you know why I come to see you? Jungkook mumbled on about things which were all incomprehensible. It's because I like your music. When I listen to your music, I get all teared up. Me, I get all teary. I feel like dying about a dozen times a day. But when I listen to your music, I want to live. YOONGI 12 MAY YEAR 22 HYYH; THE NOTES

This Jimin

This Jimin is sweet. This Jimin is precious. This Jimin is adorable. I must protect this Jimin.

‘’Small flaws, glitches, my new afterimage. Breaking down the wall between what I want to say and what I cannot say, not getting intimidated but rebelling and asking questions against what the world demands. The world’s fixed stereotypes collides with my inner self and leaves trauma for a while but this temporary glitch transforms into the driving force to create a new wavelength and becomes a part of me.’‘

Boy With Luv

Note: I found this prompt on Pinterest and it sounded promising. The first person that came to my mind was Yoongi. So I wrote a fan fiction about him. A little reminder that it is totally fictional. The character I made has nothing to do with the real Min Yoongi. Anyway, I hope you like it.

Fandom: BTS Pairing: Min Yoongi x Female reader Genre: Fluff and Angst Warning: Implication of self-harm, slight swearing, little drinking. Word Count: 3k Words

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“WHAT? It’s already 8:45?” I needed to hurry or I’d miss my 9 a.m. English class. I jumped out of my bed and changed my clothes as quickly as I could. I sprinted out of my house checking my watch to found that it was already 9.

A trip from the bus stand to my college took almost 15 more minutes. I started to run once I got down from the bus. I was breathing heavily when I opened the door to my class.

“We’ve already discussed about our new project, dear. Since, you’re late, your partner will explain it to you. Mr. Min Yoongi, as you’re the only one left without a partner, you two may pair up.” The professor announced.

I was too shocked to give any reaction while Yoongi just nodded. Every other seats were already taken. So I had to go sit on the back with this guy called Min Yoongi. The whole class went on in a blur. I glanced at my partner twice. He seemed to be really absorbed at whatever he was writing on his notes.

First, let me put some words about Min Yoongi. He was majoring in Music and we only had English course together. He looked very intimidating. I never saw him talk with anyone unless it was necessary. The only time he talked to me was when I was with my best friend discussing about our plans for a sleepover and he told me I was being too loud to be on the library. Since then, I tried to avoid him at all cost.

But now, he was my partner for the English project, whatever it was. I was already too nervous to approach him about the matter.

Once the class was over, he said to me, while packing his bag, “We have to write ‘Daily Words of Affirmation’ to each other for the next five days.”

“Huh?” was the only thing that came out of my mouth.

“The group project?” he raised his eyebrows.

“Oh right,” I said, “the group project. So, I have to write something positive to you from when exactly?”

“From today.” He headed to the door. “And also,” he turned back, “You can write a hand written note or send me via email, whatever way you’re comfortable with.” And he was gone.

“So, that’s it?” I thought to myself, “No other instructions? Can’t he just sit and talk like a normal person do when they do group projects?” I was getting really annoyed at this guy by then. What could I possibly write when I couldn’t even find anything good about him?

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My hair looked like a mess as I repeatedly ran my hand through them. “Oh, come on! Think like a mature person. Everybody has some good aspects about them.” I forced myself to think of something nice. The fact that by the end of the week we had to submit our interaction to our professor was more frustrating.

As I didn’t know him very well, I thought about writing something about his appearance instead. What was I going to write anyway? It wasn’t like I found him very attractive or something.

I closed my eyes and tried to imagine his face. For some reason he looked like a cat to me. I smiled to myself, “Fine! I’ll write that.” I hoped he’d take that as a compliment.

“You look like a cat.” I typed on my laptop. It sounded too rude. I tried to think of a creative way to put it. I typed again.

“Though lazy, cats are really skillful in hunting. Somehow, your face reminds me of a cat. Can’t wait to find out what you’re good at!”

I was really satisfied with whatever I wrote. Before I could send it, I got an email from Yoongi first.

“With or without glasses, your eyes are the most appealing bit on your face (that’s my personal opinion).”

I was taken aback. I couldn’t picture Min Yoongi writing me that. Also, his message sounded better as a Words-of-Affirmation than mine. I still couldn’t think of a decent thing to say. So without working myself up I sent my message.

Before going to bed I went to the bathroom to wash my face as a part of the night routine. I took off my glasses and stared into my eyes in the mirror. The last time someone told me that my eyes were beautiful was in grade 8. That was before I started wearing glasses.

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I was prepared to talk to Min Yoongi the next day. I needed to find out something to write this time. It was so frustrating last night that I finally built up my courage to get acquainted with this seemingly rude guy.

We didn’t have English class that day. So I texted him to meet me at the cafeteria whenever he could. After waiting for what seemed like an eternity he texted back, “Come to the library.”

“Oh God! That library again. Does this guy even think about other people’s conveniences?” But it seemed like I had no other choice. I was determined to ace that English course no matter what. So, burying my ego I went to the library.

He was sitting at the far corner, his usual place. I got closer and saw that he was reading ‘The Alchemist’ by Paulo Coelho. That caught my attention and I spoke up without hesitation, “I read that book last month.”

Yoongi glanced at me once and got back to reading again. I sat beside him. I tried to take the conversation further, “They say this book helps you to find your true destiny. But I guess I was too caught up with All-thing-is-one stuff to notice that.”

“Don’t worry.” He said turning a page, “Some people read with their eyes and not their minds.”

“Excuse me?” I felt offended, “did you just consider me as one of those people?’

He shrugged his shoulder while still keeping his eyes on the book. As a book lover his words felt like an insult to me. Why on earth did I end up being partnered up with a guy like him on a project like this?

I decided it was time to be frank, “Listen here, Mr. Min Yoongi. I wanted to talk to you only because I felt it was necessary to know you better. You know, for the project?”

“Yes, I know.” He shut his book close and stared at me. His eyes looked cold. It felt like he was daring me to say something more. Something I was desperately wanting to throw at him.

The next moment I saw something else in those eyes. But I couldn’t figure it out then. I turned to go away when I heard him say under his breath, “Because no one in their right mind would want to know me.”

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What could he mean by that? It ought to sound like a threat. But I felt like it was a cry for help. The more I got to know him, the more mysterious he was getting.

At least I was relieved. Because by then, I had already figured out what to write to him next.

“There’s hope for you because you read with your mind and not just the eyes.”

I wrote that thinking he was clever enough to see the sarcasm in it while our professor would have no clue, being unaware of the whole situation. I sent the message and went on about my day.

I got his email at midnight. I immediately opened it.

“You’re a natural optimistic, always seeing the beauty in the ugliest of places.”

I pondered over his words. If he really meant whatever he wrote, that would mean he had took enough time to put some serious thoughts about me.

“That’s for the project only, you silly!” I told myself.

As I went to bed, his face appeared in front of me. The way he looked at me when he said, “Yes, I know!” I felt like I knew the second expression on his face, “Was it, perhaps, sadness?”

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I texted him again the next morning, “Are you busy? If not, let’s meet again.” I had thought about his last message to me. It was rather a compliment. I was truly an optimist. My father once told me it was a strength to hold onto. So, I decided I would not let that go so easily just because some guy was trying to act tough.

I got a reply, “Actually yes, I’m kinda busy. Currently working on my new music.” After a second, another message popped up, “Sorry about it. Maybe we can meet at evening?”

It didn’t sound too bad this time. He was actually trying to be polite, whatever the reason might be. I didn’t write him back. Instead I went straight to the practice room.

It was a huge hall with different instruments here and there. I found him sitting at the very corner with a piano. So, he played piano? I always wanted to take piano lessons. For some reasons, I was never able to.

There was no one in the room. I moved closer to hear him play better. He was scribbling in his notes something I couldn’t see. I patiently waited without bothering him. Then, he started to play.

The music slowly started to build by the time. The sweet music turning into something, I dare say, emotional. I felt my heart getting heavy. My feet felt numb. I stayed motionless as I took in every stroke of the key within myself.

How could a person seemingly so cold, make music so touching?

Yoongi finished the whole piece and looked back at me, directly into my eyes, as if he knew I was standing there. A drop of tear fell from my eye. I suddenly realized my cheeks were wet.

“What did you name it?” I asked about the beautiful music he had created.

“First Love.”

We were sitting across the table in the café. I had a latte while he ordered an Americano. “Did you really make that?” I asked.

“Yeah.”

“It was so beautiful. I have never heard anyone playing a piano before. You sounded like a piano prodigy or something.”

“You’re saying that since you never heard anyone playing a piano before.”

A moment of silence, then I broke into a laugh. I was getting used to his kind of humor by then. Yoongi’s smile slowly built on his lip. His cheeks turned red as he said “thank you” in a low voice.

“What?” I said loudly, “I couldn’t hear you. Did you just come up with another savage reply of yours since the last one didn’t bother me?”

This time his smile widened to reach up to his eyes. That was a sight I never saw before. He looked so innocent with that gummy smile of his. I suddenly felt something inside my stomach twisting.

He felt like a boy I could love.

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Was it even possible? Could people really fall in love with someone so easily? Or maybe I was mistaking infatuation for love. Even if I wasn’t in love with him already, I was pretty sure I would be soon if I continued to get closer to him.

One thing was clear. Whatever the feeling might be, it was too strong to ignore. Never in my life had I felt something so deep.

“You are so full of love that you should cherish your ability of making such lively music.”

I didn’t hesitate to send him the message. This time, I waited eagerly for his reply. His words were reassuring. They made me feel alive. They made me realize, I had something in me. But again, that was exactly what the project was all about.

I waited and waited. At some point I fell asleep on my reading table. I woke up at about 10 p.m. I quickly checked my email. The message I was waiting for had already arrived.

“You’re a light in the darkest room, a bright star in the night sky. You’re someone’s hope in the time of complete despair.”

I knew I would keep thinking about it all night.

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10:43 p.m. I texted him, “Can’t sleep.”

“Me too.” A quick reply.

“Wanna meet?”

“Sure.”

11:04 p.m. We were sitting on the park bench. The night was surprisingly cold. I was grateful for the beer Yoongi brought with him. But I was getting high by the time.

“I don’t know what to talk about.”

“Don’t worry. I like silent company more.”

11:18 p.m. I could feel the alcohol was making me a little drowsy. But I didn’t want to go back just then. “What are you good at? Other than music?” I said trying to avoid the sleepiness.

“I used to play basketball in high school.”

11:35 p.m. I decided it was time to talk about some real shit, “I want to get a tattoo so bad.”

“Get it then.”

“My mother will kill me.”

Yoongi shrugged his shoulder. Then he unbuttoned his sleeve to show me his bare wrist. I spotted a faint white line there, “What is that?” As soon as I asked that, I knew I messed up.

“Shit.” I swore, “Sorry.”

“If you ever decide to get the tattoo, take me with you. I’ll get one here.” He raised his wrist again.

“Fine! Let’s get going then.”

11:49 p.m. Yoongi drove us to the tattoo parlor I always passed by and fantasized about getting in.

“I can’t believe we’re doing this.” I almost screamed in excitement. Yoongi smiled at me and my inside melted.

They were not allowing us to go inside since it was almost closing time. I practically begged them to let us in. After a minute or two, Yoongi stepped forward and said something to the guy I couldn’t hear properly.

Finally they let us in.

12:14 a.m. We were driving back from the parlor. “Don’t you want to see my tattoo?” I asked.

“You probably got it somewhere no one could see.”

I smirked, “I’ll show YOU though.” I lifted my shirt to show my waist where I got a little bow.

“What did you get?” I asked Yoongi, “Can I see it?”

He showed me his wrist. There was a small line drawn along which were the piano keys. It was so simple yet I knew how important it was to him.

He said, “Piano is my savior.”

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I woke up late with a headache. I quickly lifted my shirt to check my tattoo. It was there, fresh as new. I smiled to myself, “So it wasn’t a dream after all.”

I took a pain reliever and made myself some mango juice. I checked my email and found Yoongi’s message. Just the thought of reading it made my whole body squirmy.

“You’re a rebel at heart.”

It was such a compliment to me. All my life, I’d only had dreams. But I felt like a coward every time I stepped away from fulfilling them. I decided, as soon as my semester would be over, I’d start getting piano lessons as well.

“Maybe Yoongi can teach me.” I thought and smiled.

It was my turn to return the compliment.

“The courage you have to show the vulnerable side of yours, makes you stronger.”

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I texted Yoongi that I had three classes, so I would meet him at evening. I already missed more than half of the first class since I woke up late. During the other classes I kept checking my phone often to see if he had replied. There was none.

Once my last class was done, I called him. It sent me straight to voicemail, “Hey Yoongi, it’s me. Just called to know when you’re free so that we could hangout… Yeah! So, call me back when you can, okay?”

I was waiting anxiously all evening. But there was not a single text or call from Yoongi. I kept wondering what could be the reason.

“He’s probably busy, that’s all.” I tried to reassure myself. But there was a part of me which felt like something was not right.

Maybe my last message mentioning about his vulnerable side was too much. Maybe he never meant for me to see that, but he was drunk enough to let that slip.

It was already midnight. Yoongi hadn’t contact me for a whole damn day. I was really stressed at that point. I felt like I had messed up. I wanted to cry.

“Why do you have to be so clingy, you pathetic bitch?” I shouted out at myself. That didn’t help. Since there was nothing I could do, I finally fell asleep wishing that as soon as I woke up, everything would be okay.

I checked my phone the next day. There was still no reply. So, I felt like it was time I wrote my final Words-of-Affirmation to him.

“You are someone’s favorite person in the entire world.”

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Yoongi texted me that evening, “Meet me at the park.”

I saw Yoongi waiting for me beside the park bench we were sitting on two nights ago. I went to him and he looked up, his expression unreadable.

“Why didn’t you call me yesterday?” was the first thing that came out of me.

“It doesn’t matter.” He said, “Our project ends today.”

“Project?” I was too confused. What did he mean by that? Were we just hanging out because of that stupid project? I felt too numb to react to that.

Yoongi took some time before he said slowly, “It doesn’t feel right.”

“What?” I asked.

“We shouldn’t be hanging out.”

“And why is that?” I was getting a little angry at him.

“Everything’s happening too fast. I don’t think I’m ready to handle them.” He sounded as if he were scared.

“Yoongi, it’s okay! We all feel overwhelmed at times. It’ll pass. Just take it easy and see what comes next.”

“No!” he said, “Please, don’t try to get too close. We’ll both end up being hurt.”

“I’m sure that won’t happen.” I stepped forward. But Yoongi took a step back.

“But you don’t know me.”

“I want to know you.” I said, “At least give me a chance.”

Yoongi gave out a mocking laugh, “How can you do that when I don’t even know myself?”

That was it. I couldn’t bring myself to say anything else. I stood there in silence. Tears threatening me every moment to burst out.

“There is a lot I still need to figure out.” Yoongi said finally, “I need to find myself first in order to let people get close to me. I don’t want to lose any loved ones anymore.”

He came closer and took my hands. He gave me a folded paper and said, “It’s my last message to you. Forgive me for everything, will you?”

Then he walked away. Tears kept falling from my eyes as I didn’t stop them anymore. Crying was the only way I knew to deal with grief.

I opened the paper when I got home.

“You have so much potential in you that once you realize your destiny, no one can stop you from achieving it.”

Whatever the destiny was, I didn’t know it. All I knew was that what Yoongi needed was time. And I could surely gave him that. But I was not going to give up on him.

My Masterlist

Happy Birthday to my Bunny Boy

Happy Birthday to My Eternal Sunshine

Thanks for the 1k+ followers everyone.

This is the first time I've edited a photo like this. Hope y'all like it. ❤

I’m Back...

I am attending my last exam tomorrow. Soon, I’ll be posting regularly again. At least, I hope so...

These are what you’re gonna get before long:

The last part of ‘My Guardian Angel’

Fast updates on the series ‘Noona! Please! Help!’

Slow updates on the series ‘The Other Side’

Personal review on Jin’s single ‘The Astronaut’

Short drabbles, if I have the time and mood