I Had You Going There For A Second, Didn’t I? No. Maybe. Shut Up.

bro not the quencies (way of saying consequences if theres something deeply wrong with you)

was so well-behaved the dentist let me put my fingers in his mouth too

ohh yeah im a real piece of shit 👍 job please

we should all kill ourselves

All Star by Smash Mouth

I know you don’t want to hear about ursine fractals any more but it… bears repeating

my boss: *giving me critical instructions* you got that?

me: ya

me (in my mind): you make a loop de loop and pull, and your shoes are looking cool :) you go over and back, left to righ

someone: bear in mind…..

me: