Regulus And Sirius: We Listen And We Don’t Judge.

Im just saying. If anybody ever wants to propose to me, let it be with Gen’s ring.

Thank you.

Oh I've been waiting for this! I love this episode it has to be my favourite. It's just perfect. The dog fight is so good I couldn't get enough of it! Like I can't even write how much I loved this dog fight. Don't know how senku didn't pass out tho.

Senku did an oopsie...

”Just” Friends

Senku’s clubmates express surprise at Senku betting so much money on Yuzuriha not rejecting Taiju’s confession…because they thought she liked him.

Ao3

“A hundred yen says he gets rejected,” Yamada says. 

Senku raises an eyebrow as he bends over to open his school bag. They’re placing bets now? Well, he supposes it isn’t surprising. High schoolers will try to make a game out of anything, even someone else’s love confession. 

“Three hundred yen says he gets rejected hard,” Suzuki snickers. 

Well clearly they don’t know much about Yuzuriha. Senku grabs the energy drink from his bag. It’s odd though—she and Taiju come by the lab often enough that he thought his clubmates would have at least picked up on the tension there. How unobservant. 

“Five hundred yen says he gets rejected at full power!” Edamura exclaims.

Senku stands up. Heh. Might as well make some money off of these idiots.

“Ten thousand yen says she actually accepts,” he says casually, leaning back up against the windowsill as he opens his drink.

Three voices suddenly slam against his ears. “SERIOUSLY??!”

Senku smirks. “You’re welcome to drop out if you’re scared to lose,” he says, closing his eyes and taking a swig. 

“But—huh?!” Yamada splutters. “You mean you’re not secretly going out with Ogawa yourself?”

Senku abruptly sprays the entire mouthful of energy drink all over the floor, hacking and coughing. “Wh—“ he wheezes, trying to clear his airway. “What?! Why would I—what the fuck gave you that idea?!”

“Because she likes you?” Suzuki says, sounding equally bewildered. 

Senku can’t stop coughing. “Huh?!”

“Yeah, isn’t it kind of obvious?” Edamura frowns. “Like, ever since the start of the school year, the way she greets you…”

—————

Edamura was so excited for the first day of school, especially since he was a second year now! Now he could be the cool suave senpai to the cute first-year girls coming in!

Oh, there was one now! A petite girl with shoulder-length brown hair and a white headband was scrolling on her phone outside the school store. She looked kind of anxious—maybe she was lost? 

Edamura grinned. Perfect! He could see it now—he’ll sidle up to her, casually ask if she needs help, and she’ll beam with gratitude and admiratio—

“Did you seriously get lost on the first day?”

The girl’s eyes light up like the sun. “Senku-kun!” 

She runs over to a boy with pale spiky hair. “Morning! It’s so great to see you again!”

The boy raises an eyebrow. “What’s with you? You just saw me at graduation.”

The girl laughs sheepishly. “I just wanted to make sure I got to say hi—it sucks that we’re in different classes this year…”

“Tch. Next time, wait outside where we can see you,” the boy says, turning and walking away. “Come on, better find the idiot before the bell rings.”

The girl follows, tucking her hands behind her back as she leans forward and looks up at him with a sweet smile.

“Yeah.”

Edamura stares after them. A bond formed in middle school, huh? Must be nice…

—————

“She’s always so happy to see you and get your attention,” Edamura says. “Eagerly waiting for you at the door, asking you to come model for her at the crafts club, asking you to eat lunch together…” 

Senku’s eyes widen. 

Yamada nods. “And then there’s how she helps out in the lab…”

—————

Yamada blinks at the pretty brunette who’s just entered the science lab with Ishigami and begun setting up beakers on a table, with the whole club staring in confusion. “Eh? Aren’t you…Ogawa-san from the crafting club? What are you doing here?”

The girl stands up. “Oh, I’m helping Senku-kun out with an experiment today,” she says cheerfully. “Sorry, is that alright? He said it should be fine and I got the okay from my club president to leave, but Senku-kun can be rather lax about getting permission for things…”

“I told you, it’s not a big deal,” Ishigami says. “Right?” He stares at the club with piercing scarlet eyes. 

“No, I—yeah it should be fine,” Yamada says lamely. Everyone hesitantly turns back to their own projects, though Yamada notices quite a few of the club members are sneaking peeks at what Ishigami and Ogawa are doing on occasion.  

“Ah, Senku-kun!” Ogawa says suddenly. “Your goggles are slipping! Here, let me get that—“

She peels off her gloves and reaches over to Ishigami, who obligingly leans over and allows her to readjust his safety goggles. As she does, she gently brushes his hair out of his eyes and tucks it behind his ears with a warm smile. “There we go!”

“Mm,” Ishigami says, turning back to the experiment. He and Ogawa seem completely oblivious to the many eyes now fixed on them.

Yamada grits his teeth together. You lucky bastard! Man…if only I had a cute assistant…

—————

“I totally thought it was some sort of sick power play at first,” Yamada grumbles as Senku’s eyes somehow get even wider. “She’s just so affectionate with you, messing with your hair or poking your face, sometimes rubbing her fist on your arm playfully. There wasn’t a need to flaunt it in front of us!”

“Ugh, yeah,” Suzuki sighs. “Like that time when you forgot your lunch…”

—————

“Ugh, where is it…” Senku grumbles, rifling around his bag.

“Can’t find your lunch?” Taiju asks, opening his own neatly packed bento.

“Apparently,” Senku sighs, leaning back in his chair with his arms folded. After a moment, he smacks his forehead with a palm. “Ah. I left it on the counter again.”

“For a guy who has the entire periodic table memorized, you sure have a hard time with little things like that, Senku,” Suzuki points out. 

 Senku shrugs and starts to stand up. “Whatever. I’ll just grab some chips from the vending machine.”

“Oh no you don’t!” 

Suzuki startles. Ogawa Yuzuriha is pointing accusingly at Senku from the doorway, a pink fabric-wrapped bento dangling from her hand. 

She marches over to Senku’s desk, plopping her lunch on top of it and unwrapping the contents. “You’re going to eat something substantial, and you’re not going to complain about it!”

Senku rolls his eyes as Yuzuriha perches on top of his desk and plucks a piece of tamagoyaki out of her lunch, holding it out to him. “You need to eat too, dumbass,” he says. Taiju slaps him lightly on the back, which makes him choke on his spit.

“Don’t call her a dumbass!”

Yuzuriha sighs, the hard gaze in her eyes softening. “Come on, please? We’ll let you pay for ramen next time.”

Senku stares at her for a moment. 

“Ugh, fine.” He closes his eyes and opens his mouth, and she deposits the tamagoyaki into it with a satisfied smile. 

Suzuki stares. Letting a cute girl feed you…you really have no shame, Senku!

—————

“She’s always taking care of you like that,” Suzuki sighs. “Commenting on how much sleep you got, offering to repair your clothes, watching over you when you pass out in gym…”

“Yeah she’s like, literally the perfect girlfriend,” Edamura says. 

“I…huh?” Senku wheezes. “None of that was—you guys didn’t actually think we were dating, did you?”

“Well…if not that, then we figured it was only a matter of time,” Yamada says.

“The HELL?!”

“Senku.” Suzuki puts a hand on his shoulder with a serious expression. “Ogawa Yuzuriha is the prettiest girl in our grade. The only reason none of the other guys have tried confessing before is because they thought you’d electrocute them.”

 Senku stares at him incredulously. Well that seems kind of presumptuous. He promised his dad he wouldn’t electrocute assholes anymore. Although…if any boy had gone and made Yuzuriha uncomfortable with a pushy confession…yeah he could see himself considering it. Wait, that’s not the point here! 

“Well it’s not like that!” He exclaims shrilly. “Not one millimeter! I can’t…fucking hell, you actually thought all that was her being in love with me?”

“How are you so convinced she’s not?” Edamura asks. 

“Because she told me she’s in love with Taiju!” Senku snaps. “And anyone with half a brain can see it! It’s been like that since we were in fifth grade—ask anyone who knew us then!”

“Wait, you’re serious?” Yamada blinks. “You’re really…just friends?”

Senku’s face suddenly darkens, and all three boys freeze. 

“Just friends?”

He stares at them, red eyes gleaming. The boys hold their breath as he speaks, the words slipping past his lips like the hiss of a deadly rattlesnake. 

“Are you fuckers saying,” he growls, “that if Yuzuriha treated you like she does me, it would mean less to you than the promise of something romantic? That you’d let her offer you her time, her energy, her insights, her skills, her compassion, her trust, and yet call it an inferior level of relationship?”

His gaze narrows. “Because if that’s the case, then electrocution would be far too merciful.”

A thunderous, joyful shout echoes from the window—Taiju is hugging a laughing Yuzuriha with tears streaming down his face. Senku looks over, and suddenly his expression softens, the corner of his mouth turning up.

“Well, that’s settled,” he says airily, turning away from the terrified looks of his clubmates and downing what remains of his drink. “I’ve got some morons to make fun of. You can deposit the ten thousand yen each into my shoe locker whenever you like.” 

Partway down the hall, he stops and turns his head. “You know. Yuzuriha’s always saying I shouldn’t be so harsh. And maybe she’s right. Maybe your brains are so hormone poisoned that they’ve rotted away into uselessness, so I should try offering advice instead.”

He tosses his empty can into a nearby recycling bin. “If a girl like Yuzuriha calls you her friend, show some fucking gratitude. That kind of title isn’t just handed over. It’s earned.”

Senku disappears down the stairs, leaving three very bewildered teenagers behind.

“That was terrifying,” Suzuki squeaks.

“But…you know,” Yamada says hesitantly, “maybe he has a point?”

“If friendships can be like that too…” Edamura murmurs.

“Then friendship with girls…might be really cool,” Yamada finishes.

“…Haaaah,” Suzuki sighs. “We were acting pretty immature I guess…”

“And now we need to come up with thirty thousand yen,” Edamura notes.

All three let out a long groan. 

Outside in the courtyard, a new couple greets their best friend with happy tears, absorbing his acerbic ribbing with the ease and warmth of the kind of love that only they could have built. 

Gen: You know, when one male dominates another, his testosterone level rises.

Senku: What's your point?

Gen: It's exciting to think you might be getting a testosterone level.

[on the phone]

Sirius: Where are you? Dinner is getting cold!

Remus: Waiting for the bus.

Sirius: Hurry up!

Remus: Ok, I'll be waiting faster, you cunt.

Harry meeting his dad in the afterlife: Dad!

James: oh, my boy!

*very paternal hug*

Harry: I'm so happy to finally see you!

James: yeah, me too! I'm definitely not annoyed by the fact that you fell in love with a Slytherin seeker boy who's the heir to the Black house and had an enemies to lovers with him until he got the mark and broke up with you so then you married a redhead and had a son that fell in love with another Slytherin boy, heir to the house of black!

James: I'm not mad, it's just constructive criticism. Like. You're not very original bro but okay, don't worry, I'm not upset!

Harry: dad what the actual fuck

What the media won't show

reblog to give your headache to elon musk instead

It’s truly fucking wild that a) Harry is canonically obsessed with Malfoy and literally follows him around and loses interest in his favourite hobbies because of it, b) Harry is actually right about all his Malfoy theories because he KNOWS Malfoy better than the others and has been paying attention to Malfoy for YEARS in a way no-one else has been, c) Draco straight up refuses to confirm Harry’s identity at the Manor even as his parents practically beg him to and despite knowing the retribution he’ll face if Voldemort finds out, d) Harry specifically saves Draco (not Goyle) from the fire despite the extreme risk of remaining in the room any longer, e) like I’m so serious this is SO INSANE Draco RIDES ON HARRY’S BROOM BEHIND HIM he has his ARMS AROUND HIM they are SHARING A BROOM AS HARRY SAVES HIS LIFE Draco is clinging to him THIS IS A LOVE STORY you can’t make this shit up!!!! f) and it’s DRACO’S WAND that Harry ultimately needs in order to SAVE THE WORLD, and Draco’s wand responds just as well to Harry as the wand of one of his closest, longterm best friends.