Unbelievable.

This keeps popping up in my feed. I showed it to Louise this morning, she said it made her feel hot and asked me to send her a screenshot of it. Very interesting.

Imagine being strapped into a spreader bar by your wrists and ankles. Legs spread wide, bent over, unable to move.

Then imagine being placed on your back and having that spreader bar attached to a hook hanging from the ceiling. Your legs and arms in the air, unable to cover your naked body.

Imagine being left like that during a party. Open and exposed while everyone else is fully clothed. Walking by and staring at you like a peice of art.

People come by to grope you. They pinch your nipples, squeeze your ass, and take pictures of their favorite parts of you.

You become a party game. People take turns fucking you however they want. Fingering you, eating you out, fucking your face, and of course shoving dicks and dildos into you.

People cheer when someone makes you cum. They laugh at the sounds of your moans and wimpers. Everyone can see how aroused you are and they love it.

Imagine being a prop. A toy that everyone wants at their party. Constantly on display right next to the open bar.

Now it’s more to confirm I still love it, she knows she doesn’t need my “permission.”

Maybe not ashamed as such but we have had a few times where Louise has said “oh my gosh” the next morning. Most importantly, they are all dirty little secrets we share together, even if I wasn’t there at the time or, occasionally, even if I don’t know about it for a while. With all I write here, the best parts are what we share together, we have hot, loving sex ten times more often together than times where other guys are involved. We share amazing, intimate moments that none of them experience. There can be looks between us, in all sorts of places, that nobody could possibly begin to understand. Our adventure is very much about sharing her with other guys but it is so much more than that.

I don’t have many followers but thought I’d share my story, a very short version of it at least. I thought my fantasies would never become reality, my wife tried but couldn’t actually get over the line. The taboo seemed too big.

Over the past few years, I had read a lot, here on tumblr and elsewhere. It fuelled my fantasies and I put some names to what I felt, learning about hotwives, stags and cuckolds. From what I read, I explained to her how we needed rules of engagement, how I had to be involved in selection of and meeting guys and, finally, how I really should be there to share the experience.

Things changed though, I studied myself and figured that wasn’t what I wanted at all. I learnt that I don’t relate to the alpha male stag type of model, I’m certainly nowhere near the cuckold, sissy end of the spectrum but I don’t want or need the control. My inner truth was that the fantasy burnt strongly, but I wanted it to be more on her terms, for her to choose to have sex with another guy, or not.

Then, maybe four months ago, she apologised. She said she couldn’t do it and was sorry that she was a disappointment to me. I tried to tell her that wasn’t true, and ended up writing everything to her in an email (I was away with work at the time), it was long, pages and pages if it had been printed. I have analysed the fuck out of myself and, in the email, I wrote as much as I could about it, about me and my fantasies. I tried hard to let her know that I was not disappointed at all, how something forced would not have been right for me anyway. I told her she will always have a book of hall passes, for her to just imagine them in her purse. One day, if she so chose, she might show me she’d used one. When the time was right, she might also tell me a little or a lot about it.

Her choice entirely, if the passes remained untouched, then I would always remain the proud husband of a beautiful woman who could not bring herself to touch another man.

A couple of months later, she got the devil in her and gave a friend of her’s a blow job. Two weeks after that, I had to miss something we’d had tickets for a long time for, because of work. She took the friend, he booked and paid for their hotel room. They had afternoon, evening, during the night and morning sex. Two days later, remarkably, she had a threesome with him and friend of his. She chose to keep that part from me for a week or so, enjoying teasing me about “something that happened.”

Since then, she has been with each of them a couple more times, but not together. She tells me stuff, if and when she pleases. I know they are very different, the friend is a “love maker,” he likes to be all tender and passionate. His friend is the opposite, he’s big (dick size) and likes to fuck her hard, slap her ass and rough her up just a little (which she loves). I have been there once, with my wife and the friend of the friend.

We both know her actual friend, the first guy, will never go for me being there.

It was like some kind of release occurred I guess. the pressure came off and she found herself in the time, place and mood for something to happen, and went for it. From there, it’s like the awakening that many talk about occurred, that is real. She didn’t feel dirty and she saw that I did not get angry. In fact, I still can’t keep my hand off her and she is really enjoying this boost to our sex lives, let alone the other fun she gets up to.

Who knows if, or how long, it will last. It doesn’t matter either, it is incredible.

SMM

Hotwife Spectrums

For a long time, I have had a bit of a metal picture about a Hotwife spectrum or, more accurately, a cuckold kind of spectrum for a Hotwife’s husband. I see it as line, with a zero in the middle. On the left, all the way over at -10 sits the full on, alpha male stag. One the far right is the fully humiliated, caged up cuckold kind of husband. To begin with, when we started talking about my fantasies, I pictured myself being at the far left. I figured I’d be the one in control, screening dates, always there to watch etc. Not only is that how it didn’t evolve, it’s not actually how I found I really wanted it to be. I enjoyed the bit of control Louise had taken, I loved the anticipation, the tension and all else that went with not being in control. I loved the way she seemed to be more confident, the way she held things back at times, the way she knew how to tease me right to the limits that worked so well for me.

I guess I’m speaking in past tense there, but it’s not over by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, we may have only really just started to see where this will go. Louise is stretching limits, her own and mine. It is electrifying.

I guess my past tense comes from my mental picture and being totally challenged on where I sit on that little spectrum. It’s not like there was a test to give an absolute score, nothing like it in fact, but I had started to figure I actually sat somewhere around the -5 to -7 mark. Definitely not anywhere near the right of the zero point on my line but, usually, I was happily sitting somewhere to the right of that total stag point.

Going back a few weeks now, we were fighting. In reality, I was sulking. I couldn’t help feeling like I had been betrayed, by the secret affair Louise had been having with Tom, off and on, for quite a number of years. It hurt to know she had done that and had not been able to find a way to be honest, not even after she knew all about my fantasies. Honestly, it feels weird to have been so down and dark about something when, at the same time, it turned me on immensely and that one factor alone has challenged me about where I sit on my silly little spectrum line.

Then there is Louise’s part in it too. We fought, we argued, we didn’t talk at all for a few days there. Then she got as aggressive as I have ever seen her, certainly from the perspective of giving me a talking to at least. She got in my face at one stage, she told me she feared we were losing each other and she told me we needed to have a serious conversation. It was warts and all too, and it was way too much and too deep to even want to share it here.

At one stage, I guess I had gotten a bit lost in my own anger. I started asking things like how many times had she sucked his cock before I knew about it, had she taken it up the arse with him by then, how much of his cum had been inside her when we were having sex. She actually reminded me that we were barely even having sex when she started with Tom, it was true, it was a rough patch. She was answering my questions too, defiantly and honestly.

“Every time I was with him,” she said when I asked how many times she had sucked him.

“Yes, he came inside me plenty of times we didn’t have a condom first time and never used one after that.”

And so on.

My downstairs mate betrayed me too, at the time I wasn’t actually feeling any happiness with any of our conversations but he was rock hard, I couldn’t help how much it still turned me on. Louise noticed, she grabbed it, she said something like, “why don’t you just get over yourself, deep down you love what I did?”

I wouldn’t say she was right, deep down I hated so much of it, I guess I still do. But there was definitely that other side kicking in. Ha, I guess it’s like two little guys sitting on my shoulder, whispering in my ear. One says “she cheated, you should be mad.” The other one says “how good is this, your wife has been fucking other guys for years?”

We ended up in bed after that little fight. Big fight actually. After she grabbed me and felt how hard I was, she rode me in her animalistic way and just before I came she said something that is true.

She said, “you love that your wife is a dirty slut.” It wasn’t a question, it was a very true statement. She also said something about not being done and if I wanted a slut then she was going to show me how much of one she is ready to be. More on that later.

So, back to my spectrum and how my view on it has been challenged. She kicked my arse that day, there was lot more things said. My mental picture has me sitting somewhere much close to the middle now, I don’t have any control and am happily in it for the ride I guess.

That’s it for now, there’s more I’m going to write later.

Whenever I see this one (or similar), I wonder if it is possible for there to be a question I wouldn’t answer…

Love the answer to this question (love this lady’s whole blog actually).

I can certainly relate to the response and its sentiment. Louise is also the jealous type, she made it very clear, long ago, that she could not handle me being with another woman. It is actually not something I fantasise about and, even if I did, I would never do it because I could not ever hurt her like that. She also had fears that I actually could not handle the reality of her being with another man, it is part of what kept her from doing it for a long time. She is a very sexual creature, she loves sex and, now, is enjoying the experiences she is having but she would never have done it if it threatened our marriage.

For my perspective, yes I truly do get jealous. Sometimes that thoughts I have, or the things I see her enjoying, rip my guts out. But, at the same time, they make my heart race with excitement (and my dick very hard) and they make me desire her even more than I thought would have been possible. That only scratches the surface by the way.

I know most guys don’t see it my way and I am comfortable with that. Well, maybe not to the point of totally “coming out” publicly about it, but comfortable in myself with it.

So, to back up @milfincognito and her response to this Anonymous, why do others think it is fair to judge another person, their situation, their fantasies and their feelings about their relationships?

You say you have no desire to see your husband with another women yet you want to be a Hotwife while he remains faithful. Why do women who want to be a Hotwife think it’s fair to have sex outside of marriage with other men and their husbands aren’t free to do the same with other women?

This question pisses me off a little. I don't claim to speak for all women or all hotwives. I can only tell you what I'm feeling. Someone asked how close I've been to living out the hotwife fantasy and I answered honestly. The closest I've come to being in a situation where it could have happened was a few times when we went to swinger clubs. In retrospect, that was a bad idea. The truth is I am the jealous type and do not want to share my husband. He says the idea of other men fucking me turns him on, and the idea obviously turns me on as well as evidenced by this blog. The reason I haven't pushed harder to live out the fantasy in real life is because I fear it could ruin our marriage. More specifically, I fear he will not be able to handle the reality of seeing another man penetrate me. The reality of seeing and hearing me having an orgasm on another man's cock. I know him well, and I think it would be too much for him to take, and he may never look at me the same way again. I'm actually trying to be considerate of his feelings and protect my marriage.

Vocal Tom.

Who knew!? I always thought he was too quiet and shy to be like I have just learnt he really is.

I feel we’re in a really interesting phase right now, partly because of the new developments with Tom but also from a perspective of learning even more about each other. We, to be truthful, I think Louise is learning more about me and I’m enjoying exploring her reactions to things, as they come out or as they evolve.

To give it some more context, just a couple of weeks ago we were talking about my fantasies, I was trying to scale them - one to ten. I told her that watching her suck someone else’s dick is huge for me, it is a huge turn on now and it have been a huge fantasy. Somehow, she actually didn’t know that, I guess I never made it clear enough. Interestingly, she said if she had known things might have started a fair bit earlier for us. She had a lot to overcome before she was ready to have sex outside our marriage but feels that a blowjob, given the right time and circumstances, wouldn’t have been such a big deal. The conversation actually started because I sent her one of those hotwife meme things, one that showed a girl freeing a big dick with a caption that said something like “the dare was just to kiss it.”

Back to the point, vocal Tom. As I said it surprised me, and it was great to learn how it turns Louise on. Some of the things he said to her on Sunday included:

“Fuck, I just love these nipples… I could suck them all day.”

Not long after, when he was rubbing his dick on her boobs, he told her he “could cum like this, all over her tits and her face.”

He often talks about her pussy, and how good it feels to be fucking it. On Sunday he told her how he loves to watch his cock sliding in and out of her wet pussy. He was fucking her from behind at the time.

He also told her he “wants to fuck her in the arse again.”

Louise swears she told me this bit but I must have forgotten, she was and still is the only woman he has got to do that with. After they fucked, and she asked him about it, he told her he thinks about it all the time. He asked the woman he was dating too, if she wanted it there. But no, apparently it isn’t something she will ever do.

Tom does have a deep voice, that I have always known. What I didn’t know is that when he cums, he moans really deeply and, sometimes, they talk up some rather dirty stuff. All about filling her up, cumming in her married pussy and the like. Or he’ll ask her if she want him to pull out, cum all over her tits, or her face. I knew without her saying that her answer would sometimes be yes. Except for the times when she is close to cumming herself of course. I also did not know how much it turns her on.

They are just some examples, there was and often is more, or so I’m told. It’s funny, I asked her if she would like me to be more like that, to talk dirty sometimes, like she does to me (especially when she wants to make me cum). I knew the answer as soon as I asked it though, and pretty much said it myself. It would be too fake, too much like trying to be like him. She did say maybe one day, maybe there’d be a time when it wouldn’t be like that. We’ll see.

He had questions too, about me. Of everything that has happened in the last few days, they may be the most interesting part. I’ll touch on them next.