Btw @ Those Followers Who Are Quiet Lurkers And Who Like Things Here And There But Don't Say Much...i

the art's budget is two energy drinks

I'M SO OBSESSED SHINJI OUR BELOVED 🩷🩷🩷

—I trip and fall in love just like a Tuesday drunk

I always go all in, all in, all in

Over the handlebars, hittin’ the ground so hard

If I’m alone fallin’, fallin’, fallin’,

We ain’t gotta talk about it—

This is based on this AMAZING CUTIE fic @darthwhorecrux wrote!! GO READ IT. IT’S SO CUTE AND FUNNY 🤭 I was giggling and kicking my feet the whole time! :

When it got to ~that part~ I KNEW I had to draw it lmao I can’t help myself I was SQUEALING

I was also listening to “Handlebars” by JENNIE and Dua Lipa on REPEAT while drawing this, I felt like it fit the vibe~

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Post by @darthwhorecrux

💬 18  🔁 5  ❤️ 60 · I tried to write for another character but Shinji LITERALLY stormed into my room, flipped my desk, threw my laptop, broke

Mentally I am in the Clover Kingdom

Credits for clips:

Kenji_senpaii09 on YouTube

Akazahk Twixtor on YouTube

Animeclipx_ on YouTube

(Not that I always haven't been) but I am hyperfixating on Shinji HEAVY lately

And I just had a couple of martinis there is so much shiz I am about to post about my glorious king YAYYYYYYYY ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

literally @ everyone at work lmao

One of the reasons I fell so hard for Szayel wayyyy back when was because of his crazy ass abilities. Specifically his voodoo dolls. It stands to reason that he’d make one of his little assistant. He’d be such a fucking menace with it. ;)

✗ ▬ ❱❱ Ａｆｔｅｒ Ｌｉｆｅ

Szayelaporro x Reader

3k

✗ Warning: Smut. nsfw. Modern Corporate au. Our Szayel is a warning of itself. Proceed with caution.

✗ a/n: @saltychonk I know how much you love those dolls. Hope you enjoy this, or at least it brings a small smile to your face! ❤️ This is my modern-day twist on his abilities.

“Fuck!” 

You spilled some hot coffee on yourself again. Luckily, the waterproof fabric of your lab coat prevented a third-degree burn, and all you had to worry about was the mess you made in the lunchroom.

Yes, blame it on your unexplained spastic muscle movements that for some reason triggered after you joined the company three months ago. You attributed it to the possible chemical fumes you are constantly inhaling or maybe the 5 cups of coffee you consumed to get through the day. 

Nonetheless, these ‘clumsy’ moments were getting worse. Not just with coffee. You've caught yourself from falling several times as your legs threatened to give out on you. How about the time when you almost walked into a wall? Fortunately, nothing terrible has happened while handling dangerous chemicals or conducting research. Staying laser-focused on a task seemed to have done you well. But as soon as you left your work station, you left a trail of minor disasters behind you.

A visit to the doctor was useless. Nothing showed up in the blood work and nerve studies. The doctor guessed it was probably Tourette’s, brushing you off as soon as they slapped on that diagnosis. And so you didn't think much of it. As long as your work wasn't compromised, you would gladly accept the challenge and take it one day at a time. The pay and benefits were too good to make a huge fuss over it. 

Speaking of work…

Today was the day. Your three-month probation was up, and you had your performance review set up. Hopefully, your little mishaps will not be taken into consideration. You promised them you were healthy! Well, at least physically healthy. 

You sat in an empty office— the CEO’s office. You only met the mysterious man once during your initial interview. He didn't talk much and only observed you from a distance while the other two interviewers grilled you with questions. 

You hated interviews, and you definitely thought you bombed it. It was a pleasant surprise when you got your offer letter. The three months sure flew by.

Anyway, back to the CEO. He still hadn’t arrived, so you waited patiently, trying to piece together his personality by judging his furniture. It was blatantly obvious he was a minimalist. Nothing really stood out in his office—just a plain, boring canvas that could’ve used a splash of color. Everything was spotless—nothing out of line, screaming perfectionist. The room smelled like Lysol wipes and freshly squeezed lemons, a sterile kind of clean that cleared up your sinuses.

You heard footsteps. Your heart began to race as you glanced over your shoulder towards the open door. The CEO himself was the first to enter, instantly bringing color to the room. His pink hair stood out, bright enough to make the dull space feel a little more alive and almost welcoming.

He wasn't alone– two other men accompanied him. They were shareholders in his pharmaceutical empire and, therefore, had a say in the matter of your future employment.

He sat down, and the other two grabbed rolling office chairs and dragged them towards him. With him in the centre, your eyes were all over him. 

Again, he did not participate. He just quietly observed from across the desk, one hand stuffed in the pockets of his lab coat, and his other hand tapping so gently on the desk to intentionally distract you. Well, the finger tapping was the least of your worries. 

Your body felt off. A wave of silent heat suddenly enveloped your body, stirring something deeper than a sweat. Your nerves were tickled— your body twitched in places that were not (yet) visible. There was a steady pulse throbbing between your legs. 

You pressed your legs together, the heat growing, along with a pool of dampness. You clenched your pelvic floor muscles, trying to fight off an unwanted and unexpected arousal. What was happening to your body?

You were distracted. The two shareholders continued to talk about your performance, their voices a distant murmur, muffled and warped like echoes underwater. Their words slipped past you, lost in the haze clouding your mind. Luckily, they did not ask you any questions and said their part before turning to face the boss, the CEO, the man who had the final say, Szayelaporro.

You clenched your jaw, and your body was starting to tremble slightly. The arousal was growing. Your bundle of nerves were being teased by something invisible. You would take a clumsy fall any day over this humiliation.

When it came time for the CEO to say his piece, the strange feeling quickly disappeared. Just as you were about to reach your peak, his voice, sultry yet malicious, pulled you out of your anticlimactic daze. 

“Are you alright? You look rather…clammy. Nervous?”, he asked, staring directly into your eyes.

You felt a shiver run down your spine, but quickly fixed your posture, ignoring the dewy folds you sat on. “I am fine, thank you”.

“Well, based on your performance, we think you are useful to me and we have decided to keep you.” He paused for a second to give you a chance to react. As soon as your lips curled into an excited smile, he continued, “But there is one last test I have to put you through. Are you prepared for that?”.

“Of course!”, you replied eagerly. You foolishly thought it would be some written test.

The two other men got up to leave the room, and once the door closed behind them, Szayelaporro pushed his hands back into the deep pockets of his lab coat. He stood up and turned his back against you to look out the window. 

“When will I be taking this test?”, you asked, starting to squirm a little in your chair.

Szayelaporro tilted his head to the side, a grin slowly spreading from cheek to cheek that you could not see. 

Your eyes jolted wide open, your knees stiffened, and you threw your head back. A low, raspy moan escaped your lips.

“Now”, you heard him say between the blissful waves of pleasure that were crawling up your body. That feeling had returned, but it was far more intense than before. 

You were tense and sweating, soft lips pitted ever so slightly from the impression of your teeth. Vision became blurry with your tears and you had lost yourself in that moment. The world around you dimmed, muffled, as if drowning underwater. All that remained was the pounding of your heart and throbbing of your sex.

“Getting aroused at a time like this? How very inconvenient”. 

His muffled voice echoed into your ears, louder than before, as if he were standing right beside you. It pierced through the haze, pulling you back just enough to realize that he was, in fact, standing right beside you.

That sensation had disappeared once more, toying with your emotions and worse, your sanity. You want to burst into tears and run out of the room. However, your legs felt heavy and your body limp, like a doll. 

You decided to focus your attention back to the CEO; his bright pink hair seemed to have lured you out of that growing despair. He leaned casually against the desk directly in front of you. He was so close, you could smell his citrus cologne. 

He was smiling. 

Was he getting a kick out of your misery? Was he aware of what demon possibly possessed you? You did not believe in spirits, but you were ready to call for an exorcist.

“No. Period cramps”, you lied, leaning forward to exaggerate the discomfort in your belly. It wasn’t a complete lie. You did feel discomfort and ‘cramps’ in your pelvic area.

“Oh? Would you like me to rub your belly?”, he suddenly offered.

You looked up at him, wondering if that was the ‘test’. 

“No, I’ll be fine, thank you”. 

His hands were still in his pockets, digging for ‘treasure’. That mischievous grin did not leave his beautifully contoured face. 

“I do have to say, I am surprised by the lie you chose to tell. You are nowhere near your period. In fact, you are close to ovulation, if anything”. And he said all that as if it was normal to know such intimate details about a random person’s menstrual cycle. So nonchalant and matter-of-fact kind of way. 

“Oh, don’t look so shocked. You gave us your blood sample when you applied for this job”, he created another suspenseful pause. “And no, you do not suffer from a neurological disease. I have simply been ‘toying’ with you”.

“What?” You are confused and stunned, unable to comprehend what he just said. It was otherworldly magic he spoke of.

Szayelaporro finally removed his hands from his pockets to reveal his little secret. You squint your eyes to make out the details. Once your dilated pupils took it all in, your eyes snapped wide open, shock paralyzing you.

He was holding a small doll that looked very much like you. The facial details and even the clothing matched your description.

“What the hell is that!?”, you asked, intimidated but brave enough to snap at him.

“Oh? A doll”, he replied, offering no further emphasis or explanation. 

“No! I mean, why the hell does it look like me?” 

“Oh? Does it?” He held the mini-you doll up to his face and examined it closely. He looked back at you and smiled. “Well, what a coincidence. Clearly, whoever made this has good taste”.

He shook the doll gently, and you heard some rattling come from within. You felt nauseous, your lunch threatening to make an escape.

He popped the head open and he pulled out what seemed to be a tiny ….. uterus. You saw a display of other tiny organs dancing within the cavity of the doll. He had no interest in the rest. Crushing his opponent’s organs is how he landed at the top of his industry. With you, he had other plans. 

You think it’s a kid's learning toy. However, he quickly proved you wrong. 

The little piece danced between his fingertips, your eyes carefully following it, unsure of what was even happening. 

Without a thought, he dragged his unusually long tongue along the surfaces of the tiny piece. You felt something scrape along the inside of your uterus. 

“What the…!!!!.”

He stopped, so did the sensation.

And if you still hadn't made that association, he tried it again. 

“Stop!” you begged, watching him flick his tongue along the mini-uterus. Apparently, it represented your uterus. 

“So you’ve figured it out?”

Your insides are cramping in a strange way. Your panties are damp and he could smell your arousal. 

“How the hell are you doing this? Magic!?” Absurd for a scientist like yourself to believe in magic.

“Magic? No, my dear, this is … let’s say a gift from my previous life”, he tried to explain, but it was no better than the ‘magic’ logic.

“So you’ve been…manipulating me all this time? All those falls and accidents? It was because of that?” You pointed towards your doll, the head was still popped open, your insides exposed.

He screwed your head back on and tucked the doll back inside the pockets of his lap coat. “Maybe. Maybe not. But don’t you worry your pretty little head. I will never harm your little doll”.

Harm?!

With that little piece of organ rolling between his thumb and index finger, he brought it up towards his lips, and you expected him to give it another lick. You brace for the worst. 

Instead, his long tongue crept out between his lips and scooped up the toy piece. It slithered back into his mouth, the little trinket tucked away like a prize.

By now, you’d put two and two together—he could manipulate your body using that little mini-you doll. You assumed that crushing it would kill you. But what about eating pieces of your organs? What kind of twisted plan did this cannibal have in mind?

“Confused? Don't be. If you can pass my next test, the job is yours”, he explained. He sat on the desk, one leg crossed over the other, quietly observing how you and your body responded to his twisted scheme.

It was only a matter of time before the ‘spell’ took full hold. Whatever he had done, it was far worse than anything you’d endured up to this point.

Your skin felt prickly and sensitive, even your clothes felt like a burden. That sensation travelled down your body, leaving a trail of perspiration and shivers until that feeling finally settled between your legs. 

You pressed your thighs together, seeking friction to scratch that itch, the growing dampness adding to the irritation. Not that you had any experience, but it felt like you had downed a bottle of aphrodisiacs. You had become like an animal in heat. 

He continued to watch with a smug look on his face, his plan finally coming to fruition. You wanted to bolt out of the room, far away from him, but your legs were dead weight. Besides, you could not walk the hallways in your current condition. 

“Need some help?”, he offered.

Silence was denial. You bit your tongue, refusing to give him the satisfaction he craved. 

“Stubbornness doesn't quite suit you. I have the antidote to your problem. All you have to do is ask nicely”. Either way, he didn't mind what path you chose. It was entertaining to watch you struggle.

Antidote? There was a remedy to your problem? A problem he created!

You forced down what little pride you had left and rested your hand on his knee.

“Please…”

“Please what? Be more specific”. Oh, he was certainly testing you-- testing your patience.

“Please, give me that antidote”, you tried again.

He jumped off the table and grabbed your hand. He peeled you off the cushioned chair and kicked the rolling chair out of the way. Slowly creeping his way behind you, he placed his pointy chin onto your right shoulder. 

“I thought you’d never ask”, he whispered. 

This was not the antidote you expected. 

He pushed you forward, your chest landed flat on the table. His hands moved around your waist, undoing your pants and lowering them as if it were the normal thing to do. 

“What the hell kind of antidote is that? A suppository?” You didn't squirm. You didn't fight him. You had no willpower to do so. Whatever he had to offer, you would gladly take it just to get rid of the discomfort. 

“Exactly”. His chuckle went unnoticed. 

He shuffled around behind you. He took off his belt and tossed it on the desk, just barely missing your face. The sharp sound of zipper tearing its way down echoed in the room. Your instinctive reaction to that sound was to clench from below. 

There was some pressure-- something hard, rounded and smooth was poking you, trying to pry open your wet folds.

“Ease up. You will choke the precious antidote before it even enters your body”. His tone was a touch softer than before— just enough to fool you into lowering your guard. And you handed over your trust, as if it held no value anymore. 

You trusted him to take care of your problem. 

And take care he did.

“That’s it. Open up wide and take your..…medicine”, he slammed his hips forward, rocking your world.

Your vision went white. It stunned you for a few seconds, your walls pulsating around his intruding length. He did not give you a moment of peace, no time to acclimate, hips slapping to a very calculated rhythm. 

He knew your insides from the inside out. 

But how? How was he hitting the sweet spots so easily without any exploration? How did he map out your insides without ever being inside? 

You did not complain. You were a moaning, drooling and slippery oozing mess. The antidote was working now that you had something to clamp down on. 

With your arousal building and on the verge of popping, you reached behind and placed your hand on his thigh. He didn't think much of it. His focus was on pounding the antidote of a dick inside you.

He could feel your hand creep up towards the pockets of his lab coat. He knew what you were fishing for. 

You snatched the doll from his pocket and clutched it tightly. As you rested your hand back towards your head, he leaned over you, his hand settling gently on top of yours—the one gripping the doll.

“I have no use for that anymore. You are now part of me. We are contractually bound for all eternity. In this life and in the next. You will not be able to escape me so easily, my darling”, he whispered into your ear, his hips locked into you, pumping you full of thick seed while casually carrying on with his conversation.

The fact that he just dumped a hefty load inside your fertile womb didn't faze you. What alarmed you the most were his words.

They were familiar. Nostalgic. 

Nonsense. That would mean you’ve met this man before—but how could you forget such an eccentric character?

It defies all scientific logic. And yet… could there be a slight chance you shared a bond with this man in a previous life?

Images of sand dunes and a giant fortress in the middle of a barren desert flashed before your eyes as you reached climax. His hand was teasing out your orgasm, vigorously rubbing your clit so you don't fall behind. 

“Cum for me, my human pet. Let it all unravel…your desires, your past and your future”.

Neliel with no mask

I'm sorry but i can't stop thinking about Shunsui and his fertility issues.

Warning; smut, no minors, male erectile dysfunction

Imagine him getting excited for the evening, looking forward to helping his sweet flower petal unwind for the day considering how busy and hectic it was around the barracks.

After a nice steamy shower, smelling like a flower shop, he walks into the bedroom where you lay in nothing but a sexy set of lingerie— his favourite set and it never failed him before. But today, there is not the slightest twitch between the loins.

He keeps the towel wrapped snug around his waist so you don't notice his limp problem. The smile on his face never wavers and with that positive look of confidence, he gets between your legs and skillfully gets you wet.

His hot breath and wet lips has you cumming on his tongue multiple times. He gives you a moment to breath between each orgasm. And when you think he is done, he takes permanent shelter between your thighs and starts fingering your wet sex while sucking your sensitive swollen clit. As much as the problem (or the lack of) between his legs didn't bother him, he did not want to disappoint you and leave you unsatisfied.

“Shunsui! STOP!”, you cry and gently tug on his wet hair to pull him off. You are over-sensitive and your body is twitching to your racing pulse.

Shunsui moves up towards your head and lays on his side, propped up on his elbow.

“Sorry Petal. Looks like tonight is not the night”, he says with a smile on his face. He knows you are tired out anyways thanks to his masterful tongue which honestly was enough to get you through most nights.

You look down and notice his towel still shielding his shame. You unravel the towel to reveal his limp dick that appeared somewhat lifeless.

“I’m sorry. I thought the lingerie would work”, you sigh and run your hands up and down his lower abdomen, wondering if a gentle massage would get the blood flowing.

His fingers caress your cheeks and he plants a soft kiss on your forehead. “Dont apologize. You looked beautiful. I'm just an old man with old habits hard to break.”

There was a moment of silence as you lay in his warm embrace, his coarse body hair tickling your warm skin.

Shunsui was content with using anything but his dick to please you. As long as you were content, he was content.

However…..

The next day he pays a visit to Squad 4 and gets some herbs for his problems. He ‘accidentally’ double dosed for the hell of it and can't get it down. “Let’s make up for lost time, petal”.

Aizen: I'm going to overthrow the natural order of things by conducting experiments, backstabbing everyone, taking over Hueco Mundo, vaporizing a city, and killing the Soul King.

Kisuke: ...that sounds like a lot of work and possibly doomed to failure. I'm just gonna bring reality television shows to the Seireitei and let people overthrow the natural order for me.

Aizen: ...what?

Kisuke: What?