I Might Go On A World’s Finest Tangent Today.

Confidence is at an all time zero today. Anxiety is rising. Maybe I’ll post tomorrow or tonight when I’m losing my mind from lack of sleep.

so Batman has the skill Functional Dissociation In Emergency that allows him to shut down all emotion when things get real bad which is why his coworkers think he's a sociopath and why his kids feel vaguely ashamed that they weren't born with this very impressive feat

yes there is a mini-little Bruce in his head that's having the panic attack and yes that Bruce comes screaming to the surface the second things are deemed safe and Batman has to go throw up in the corner in response

I’m so excited we have bleeding hearts at work I’m gonna buy them!

Ok one more for the night:

A small list of things I think Bruce would have in his utility belt. (This is inspired by lots of things including posts on Tumblr. Please go check out the people I mentioned.)

1. A extra cape (he will often wrap his cape around victims and then feel too bad to ask for it back so he just has an extra cape. Inspired by a Detective Comics issue.)

2. Horse biscuits shaped like bats (inspired by that tumblr post about the Trinity riding unicorns. One of the commenters noted that maybe Batman was giving the unicorn biscuits in stead of that being the unicorns name and that idea is stuck in my head. The post is by dangerousdan-dan and the comment is by raaaaaaaawr)(pls inform me if i missed an a)

3. Shark Repellent (we all know)

4. The Kryptonite Ring (we also all know)

5. Sugar free lollipops (from the Nightwing issue)

6. Glitter Smoke Bombs (Stephanie snuck those in with his regular ones)

7. Gel Pens (inspired by my own post cause I thought about it more and Bruce would absolutely use gel pens regularly just not glitter ones cause the ink feels rough after it drys and the glitter gets everywhere)

8. A Camera Baterang (from that one family photo comic)

9. Catnip and Cat Food (he leaves some out for Selina’s cats)

10. Pain Meds (for various reasons but these ones are primarily for the back pain he undoubtedly has forever after knightfall)

11. Medical Stuff of all types, yes they all have little bats on them. (This ranges from bandaids to menstrual pads. Inspired by a ditzybat post)

12. A bat recorder (just in case he needs to record any final words, for others or for himself)

Along side playing Fallout New Vegas I will also be playing Fallout 4 because I have this immense urge to build settlements.

I’ve downloaded so many mods.

I just realized something, where did he get that drink. Maybe it’s a “he’s the only one who accepts the offer” but it’s so funny to me that he’s the only one there who has a drink.

Maybe he made it himself idk

Ok so this is hilarious, but the funniest thing to me is that Clark is so chill.

CLARK YOU NEARLY DIED?!

He’s just like meh, hot cocoa time. Also I’m gonna make joke about my friend. Love Clark! Just Clark is so fun!

Wait Bruce putting himself in danger to be petty with Clark and Clark not being able to do anything cause Kryptonite fits really well in my head.

Clark: “B please! You’re gonna get sick or worse please stop!”

Bruce: gets out another stick of kryptonite gum and starts chewing on it

Clark: “B NO” with tears streaming from his eyes

Idk why but this is hilarious to me

I think Batman passive-aggressively chews his kryptonite gum when he's annoyed with Clark. The sound itself drives Clark insane but the gum is a warning that further arguments between them will be settled on a battlefield of some sort.

Quick headcanon that at some point, the Justice League makes a time-off calendar for every time a leaguer is busy and needs someone to keep their city safe while they’re gone. Maybe they have a work trip or a family thing or even some vacation they planned.

All a hero has to do is request time off, and another member will sub in while they’re gone. The only problem is that it creates a pattern. It would be suspicious if Green Arrow is only replaced when Oliver Queen is on a business trip, right? So to keep the public on their toes, JL members are encouraged to take a random day off each month or so and switch out with no rhyme or reason. Just any random day, any random hour.

The outcome is complete chaos.

Clark Kent has the pleasure of interviewing Wonder Woman at the scene of a car chase she just stopped in Metropolis.

Some muggers in Star City are scooped up into a giant glowing cage while Green Lantern riddles off bird puns to an exasperated Black Canary.

A team of robbers hit a bank in Central City but get roasted by Plastic Man for their poor their safe-cracking skills as they’re taken into custody.

Black Manta uses his high tech weaponry to wreak havoc in the Atlantic only to be hit with a torpedo as the Bat-Sub dives towards him at full speed.

Cyborg is lecturing a group of teen vandals in Fawcett City when Captain Marvel just waltzes up, says, “I’m tapping back in,” and continues the lecture where he left off.

Complete. And. Utter. Chaos. No one knows who will show up at the scene now, not even the cops, but criminals are scared shitless.

The JL decides to keep the calendar. If only for entertainment.

my gf

Bruce, Titus, and Ace are all in the cave.

Damian: “Father, where is Titus? I wanted to take him to visit Batcow.”

Bruce turns around revealing Titus dressed in a Robin outfit that fits him perfectly. Ace is beside him in full Bathound armor.

Bruce: “…”

Damian: “…”

Bruce: “I also made an extra set of Bathound armor for him…”

Damian: “and you did all this without me?!“