It Was Never About Retrieving The Hostages Or Protecting Anyone. After More Than 105 Days Of Genocide,

i love how the most mundane things suddenly become fun and enjoyable when you do them with someone you care about

Since I already made this a tag, I might as well develop the thought: William is a self-fulfilling prophecy personified. He wholeheartedly believes that no one would ever respect or need him in any way despite his desperate want for attention and splendor.

He wants people to give him attention and care for him, only to push them away and cry about how lonely he is; he alienates himself from Elizabeth, shoves her off, and so, despite still caring for him in a way, she grows resentful of him (just like she does with Henry).

I am 100% sure he was doing that with Henry, too. Henry must have loved him to some extent. If not romantically, then as a close friend, family perhaps. Yes - Henry was distant, constantly drifting away with his thoughts - fixated. If William cared to get closer, he would surely be able to.

But William wasn't trying to get any closer; he was in his little bubble of obsession and spite, always just a bit out of reach, wallowing in misery that he hid from everyone else.

Henry was his only close friend, but in the end, it was like they barely knew each other (They were both oh so lonely).

Instead of taking the first step, William grows jealous, craving Henry's attention and convincing himself he will never get it. He starts blaming it on Henry's children: Charlotte especially, 'daddy's little girl.'

In Charlie's memories, William looks like he is considering which one to take, her or her brother. I don't think that's the case - I think he's always intended to take her. It was just a matter of figuring out which was which: they were twins, and it was dark in the storage.

He knew what would hurt the most. Henry didn't seem to care about Sammy nearly as much as he did for his little girl. He started drowning himself in grief while William was considering some things.

What a power trip that was!

What a center of attention he's become, even though people weren't aware he was the culprit.

What a thrill.

Not only had it made him feel powerful (feared), but it had also given him a splendid opportunity to become Henry's shoulder to cry into. It had also fully convinced him of what he'd always thought: no one would ever love him. He was a terrifying and imposing figure.

Maybe he'd felt justified in his crime; maybe the fun that came with it was secondary.

He wanted to be hated, feared, to wake disgust. It was better than remaining unseen, even if it was his fault.

It's like he wants to get mistreated to have justification, of sorts, the satisfaction of being correct. He takes pleasure from people being scared of him, disgusted with him, and hating him. Whenever someone shows any sign of care or concern, he lashes out.

Did he beg Henry to mistreat him? Not with words, but his behavior? Did he confess so he could see the betrayal, the hatred? Disgust? Was he drinking it off his eyes? Did he want Henry to turn that hatred into violence?

When Henry made his last decision, was he disappointed? Was he satisfied?

Lonely, again?

He is constantly setting himself up for failure.

It is not lost on me that the people accusing shahed of being a scammer reacted like that with a screenshot of the post where i specifically talked about shahed as a photographer and what she had personally lost to the zionist occupation in gaza.

And while they are not the first to try and discredit Shahed, i have noticed so far that a lot of it has come from people who have “free palestine” in their bios and palestine flags in their headers- like it's an aesthetic rather than an actual movement towards decolonization we must commit ourselves to. Because the people making these accusations thoughtlessly don’t have to commit themselves to anything- no matter what happens, they’ll get to keep living their privileged lives unchallenged.

It seems to me that the user base from the imperial core is only comfortable talking about atrocities happening to people in gaza when they are faceless victims they personally do not have to know or interact with, but not when they are real people with rich internal lives- with families, friends, hopes and dreams, and as artists who deserve to be uplifted and seen.

They are unable to confront the personhood of the people who their empire is actively killing today, and the enormity of everything the victims have lost and it all reads like a violent reaction to their own discomfort with having to hear about it at all- the claws come out and suddenly everyone is a liar and a fraud who is out to steal the measly $5 they were never even forced to donate. "Eat the rich" website my ass you people cant even be trusted to not report and try to get accounts of people deleted when they are just asking for help.

I will not let you discredit and insult shahed and her family like that.

I have known shahed for a month or so now and we talk on most days, when she is able to get a good internet connection. It has been spotty recently because of the incessant bombing, and because she got displaced after the massacres last week from where she and her family had been encamped at khan younis.

She has talked to me about her little sisters Rafif and Masa a lot. Rafif, thirteen years old, likes to read and write stories, winning prizes for it at a sector level, while Masa, who Shahed has described as a nine year old diamond, loves to draw.

They are both currently very ill with severe hepatitis from the unclean water in gaza.

Shahed told me that in the days before she and her family had gotten displaced, she had been recommended by the doctor who had been treating the kids to give them sweets, so that they can keep their strength up with the sugar.

So shahed decided to make them cake. With the scarcity of food and water in gaza right now, alongside the lack of basic amenities available in a kitchen, it had taken Shahed days of hunting to scrounge up all the ingredients she needed to make a cake. She often ran into dangers just trying to gather ingredients for them, as many areas in khan younis were turned into active combat zones. Oftentimes she escaped from death by just a hair.

Consulting her friend who is a chef, she was finally able to make it using a clay oven and give it to her sisters.

She has told me that despite how tired and sick she herself was, and all the dangers she had been through, it was all worth it when she saw her sisters’ faces light up when they got first taste of the cake she had painstakingly made for them.

This was around the same time she was able to collect the whole $40,000 USD for her sisters’ evacuation so that they can seek proper treatment for their illnesses in egypt.

It was also one day before they were forced to flee from their camp at khan younis due to the constant bombing by the IOF.

Both online and offline, Shahed has been fighting for her sisters’ safety at great cost to herself, despite all the obstacles in her path.

Right now, she has registered her sisters for evacuation at the hala agency for when the border opens so they can get to safety. But due to the lack of funds for it, she will not be able to join them when they leave and will have to stay behind with the rest of her family.

In her own words:

"This is my family and I will always fight for them. I know that when I am afraid, I will be able to survive if I know that they will be by my side. We will be together. I can't imagine an instant where we are apart.

I will be too lonely, and I will collapse without them. Who else will give me the motivation and strength to fight? they are everything, my family is like my soul. I can't imagine for a moment that we are not with each other.”

Her sisters are her strength, and without Shahed i can't imagine there will be people in Egypt who will fight for those little girls as fiercely as she does. The safety Masa and Rafif want to escape to CANNOT exist without Shahed, and she has told me how heartbroken they are too at the idea of being forced to leave Shahed and the rest of the family behind.

TIME IS RUNNING OUT. TO EVACUATE THE WHOLE FAMILY OF 17, SHAHED WILL NEED TO GATHER 80K WITHIN THE NEXT WEEK.

THEY ARE CURRENTLY ONLY AT 54.6k/80k

PLEASE SUPPORT SHAHED AND KEEP HER FAMILY FROM BEING TORN APART.

With regional tensions being escalated by the zionist occupation in gaza, we don't know when they might get a chance to evacuate again. The people who have been hellbent on discrediting palestinians and discouraging people from donating to them by targeting shahed recently have been beyond cruel, and we CANNOT allow them to hinder Shahed from saving herself and her family.

gofundme.com

Donate to Help Shahd in Gaza!, organized by Shahed Muhammad

Have you ever experienced seeing your dream broken in front of your eyes and not being able to do … Shahed Muhammad needs your support for H

Her gfm has been verified and appears #224 on hussein and nairuz's list of vetted fundraisers.

We need to get them to this goal one way or the other but i can't do it on my own. So PLEASE repost her gofundme in your whatsapp groups, in your discord servers.

Share her story, repost her photography anywhere you have reach, share the link to the raffle being conducted for her @journalsforpalestine wherever you can this CANNOT WAIT.

Shahed needs these funds as soon as possible. Her entire family is at stake and we can't fail her now.

It's the festive season, so I'm allowed to draw Willry if I want to; I'm using up my "sappy artwork" quota.

Merry Cringemas.

ME NIEGO A RECONOCER ESTO.

ES EL MALDITO GASLIGHT MÁS GRANDE DE LATINOAMÉRICA.

the worst thing that could possibly happen to ao3 is it being put on the app store so please stop asking for it because you don't understand what would happen if that went through. ao3's whole deal is it archives EVERYTHING, while the apple app store's whole deal is keeping everything clean and safe. so if ao3 were to have an app all of the 'bad' stuff, including nsfw in general, would have to be censored at best or would be purged at worse. the google play store is more lax but who fucking knows what GOOGLE would police if they got their hands on the archive. do not ask for an app. do not use third party apps. it's on mobile browser functioning perfectly, just fucking use that before you ruin everything for everyone please.

Spin this wheel and tell me if you got something you need/want.

you know how it is