But Sir Those Are My Emotional Support Stupid Country People

My instagram: My life is great! I wake up refreshed, feeling and looking good, ready to tackle the day!

My tumblr: fucfucfucfuc where did I put the thing goddamnit my life is falling to pieces

5 minutes of racist, homophobic, transphobic anti-feminist Ann Coulter getting dragged on Comedy Central’s Roast of Rob Lowe

The infinitive for this is Danny Devitar and I died laughing at that

Updated Master List

I’ve been abandoning, editing, or pulling down materials I’m not happy with lately. Along with general inactivity on Tumblr, I realized my post history is inaccurate. Thus, I present all completed material I have written and still actively have up. Note this is Hetalia content unless otherwise stated.

Fake It Until You Make It: Ivan fakes a relationship with Alfred to get out of his miserable marriage. Clean-ish human AU with rusame and rochu. 13 chapters.

Heart Of Hearing: An entire universe of FACE interaction that begins around Matthew as a deaf child. This is a massive domestic story, being released weekly until it’s conclusion. Nedcan, rusame, denpru, and much more. 55 chapters and counting.

Landing Off Course: Alfred’s plane crashes into the sea, but he miraculously survives. Clean human AU rusame created for MerMay. 6 chapters

Fuck And Burn The House Down: Title says it all. Dirty rusame. 1 chapter.

A Bunny’s Tail: Alfred and Ivan do pet play. Dirty rusame. 1 chapter. For Family: Sad historical Canada in WW2. Clean with no ships. 1 chapter.

A Fairy Big Problem: Fairy prince Alfred is sent to Earth as disciplinary punishment. Cleanish rusame and nedcan. 14 chapters.

The Spy That Stole My Heart: Spy Alfred is forced to work with reformed super villain Ivan on a dangerous mission in France. Very violent spy AU rusame. 11 chapters.

Hopping Mad Over You: Lars loses his beloved pet rabbit in the apartment, magic ensues. Clean human AU nedcan. 1 chapter.

Birds Of A Feather: Matthew, god of birds, has chosen a new mate. Clean gods AU nedcan, prucan, and rusame. 1 chapter.

Friendship Is Magic: Matthew is the unhappiest village member of friendship village. Violent dirty My Little Pony/Hetalia mix with nedcan and rusame. 1 chapter.

Crazy Love: Matthew’s alien crazed father is set up with eccentric recluse Ivan. Cleanish human AU nedcan, rusame and amefra. 7 chapters.

His Song: Matthew sings Lars a song. Clean canon nedcan. 1 chapter.

Learning Her Way: Matthew escorts his transgender girlfriend to school. Clean human AU nedcan. 1 chapter.

Matthew, The Worst Demon Ever: Matthew is very bad at tormenting Lars. Lars doesn’t seem to mind. Very violent demon AU nedcan and fruk. 8 chapters.

Love Is For The Birds: Matthew is a Canadian goose in a zoo. Clean zoo AU with nedcan. 1 chapter.

Two Terrible People In Love: France and England are assholes watching TV. Clean canon AU fruk. 1 chapter.

Eyes For You: Canada slips Netherlands a note during a meeting. Clean canon nedcan. 2 chapters.

Hot Canadian Pizza: Lars delivers a saucy pizza. Dirty-ish human AU nedcan. 1 chapter.

Till We Part: Ivan’s wife dies, and Alfred comforts him. Clean human AU rusromano and rusame. 1 chapter.

Giving Chase: Wolf has feelings, and he is not great at expressing them. Dirty-ish Nu Pogodi! fic (soviet cartoon give it a chance). 7 chapters.

Cut Above The Rest: Alfred commits suicide. Violent canon implied rusame. 2 chapters.

I Choose You: Alfred and Ivan are roommates in the complicated world of pokemon. Violent Pokemon/human Hetalia AU with nedcan and rusame. 26 chapters.

Paternity Testing: Sweden gets a surprising paternity test result. Clean canon with no ships. 1 chapter.

Curses And Gifts: Follow Natalia as she moves beyond suicidal mental blocks. Clean-ish human AU with hunbela lesbians. 2 chapters.

Love, Magic, And Insurance Fraud: Toris’s life falls apart after he buys a fridge off a shady polish website. Cleanish modern fantasy AU with poliet, prucan, and rusame. 15 chapters.

Shut Down: Alfred hides at Ivan’s house while his government is in turmoil. Dirty canon rusame. 1 chapters.

Curiosity Killed The Cat: Detectives Ivan and Alfred team up to solve a grisly crime. Dirty human AU rusame, aushun, and more. 17 chapters.

Happy Birthday: Russia goes insane in his apartment. Violent canon with implied rusame. 1 chapter.

From The Web: Alfred gets a spider obsessed new roommate. Apocalypse AU with rusame and geripan. 20 chapters.

Learning From My Mistakes: Grow with Toris as he stumbles through the hard lessons of school, friendship, and what love actually is. Dirty human AU with poliet, lietbel, and rusame. 15 chapters.

Fortunes, Folly, And Vodka: Ivan, a Russian gypsy con artist, can suddenly see ghosts. Dirty modern fantasy AU with spamano, gerita, and ruscan. 11 chapters.

The Founding Of Kievan Rus: Ivan is a young nation that is willing to get his hands dirty. Historical canon with no ships. 1 chapter.

Life Debt: Alfred rescues Ivan from himself after the USSR dissolves. Violent canon rusame. 11 chapters

Far From Home: Lost cosmonaut Ivan is rescued by alien alfred in deep space. Dirty space AU with rusame and packed with aliens. 19 chapters.

Bottled Emotions: Alfred loses his temper on the job. Violent canon AU with implied rusame. 1 chapter.

Hetalia Monsters Universe Series: This is three connected stories about Alfred loving Ivan, who has been a secret sea monster for centuries. It is domestic canon rusame, but also has heaps of tentacle sex. Part one is 9 chapters, part two is 7 chapters, and part three is 2 chapters.

His Amazing Grace: Alfred sustains massive brain damage, and Ivan helps him heal. Cleanish canon rusame. 15 chapters.

A Life Of Glitter: Alfred and Ivan raise Matthew in the glory days of the 1980′s. Clean fluffy human AU. 5 chapters.

Madness And Profits: A poem about mad scientist Alfred seducing business man Ivan. Cleanish human AU rusame. 1 chapter.

Lost And Found: Monster hunter Alfred attempts to rehabilitate insane wizard Ivan. Dirty fantasy AU rusame. 11 chapters.

Life Is Not A Sitcom: Alfred is seduced by Belarus, but it backfires hilariously. Cleanish canon rus/ame/bel poly. 10 chapters.

Ambitions Beyond The Stars: Alfred asks Ivan to kill someone for him, and their relationship grows from it. Violent canon rusame with sappy ending. 47 chapters.

The Oops: Ivan accidentally becomes pregnant. Dirty canon rusame. 6 chapters.

Branding The Future: Ivan and Alfred take over the world. Clean canon rusame. 2 chapters.

Weapons Of Mass Distraction: Italy has secret weapon technology that Ivan and Alfred want. Clean canon with implied rusame. 1 chapter.

Feeling Feline: Ivan is a sexy cat. Cleanish canon with humour. 1 chapter.

Fate Follows: Russia discovers a deadly secret about America. Cleanish canon rusame. 10 chapters.

Dark Destiny: Necromancer king Ivan takes prince Alfred hostage. Clean fantasy AU rusame and fruk. 3 chapters.

Beauty To Die For: 1920′s Assassin Ivan desires mafia wife Amelia. Clean 1920′s crime AU. 1 chapter.

Forgien Mother with Homosexual Tendencies

Literally this is my plan in life so

For anyone who’s ever wondered who they’d be in a 19th century novel, the wait is over: I put together a 19th Century Character Trope Generator!

If you’d like to reblog, put your character in the tags because I’m curious.

This is my new fursona

Sonic (2019)

xiyao: ugly, dry, jin guangyao manipulated and lied to lxc for their entire relationship and hurt/killed ppl important to him, doesnt involve nie mingjue, no potential

nielan: sexy as fuck, so much potential, free real estate, dramatic and tender, two sect leaders, involves nie mingjue, nmj genuenly cared for lxc, overall good

@summerdragonflys

…. BOYFRIENDS ….

So outside of our house we have a couple of trees, and occasionally doves will make their nests in them. About 10 years ago, some mother dove had nested in one of the trees, and when we went outside to go to school and work, we noticed that the nest had fallen of the tree, and the two baby chicks were just,,, laying on the ground. So my dad took a small basket, nailed it to the tree, and put the nest back in. He then scooped the chicks up ever so gently and placed them in their new, secure, nest.

Both of the babies lived, and every year a mother dove will come to roost in the secure nest my dad built. We like to think the new dove is the baby of the old dove, coming to live in the family nest.

So this year, as usual, a mother dove comes to incubate her eggs in the nest. However, this year has been particularly rough and the tree has not grown leaves yet and there is minimal shelter for the bird. It's also been very rainy and cold.

So every morning my dad, this strong, tough, jaded man, goes put to check on the dove and talks to her. Things like,

"Ya made it through the night huh? I know there's not a lot of cover for ya," "It was extra rainy, but yer still doin a good job hun," "I bet yer babies'll be big and strong,"

And it is the sweetest thing to see my dad talk to these birds every morning