I’ll Drink Myself To Death Inside This Prison Cell

losing appetite because you're sad is the worst feeling ever.

“sorry i didn’t mean to dump that on you”

brother i would climb the tallest mountains and swim to the deepest depths for you. every time you smile i wonder if anything could be more beautiful and every time you laugh it’s like an orchestra of joy. of course i’ll be here to listen. i love you bro

i feel so gross. so rotten, i almost feel dead in a way. it feels as though i’m not living, merely drifting through my existence. i haven’t cleaned my room in weeks, i haven’t done any of my assignments, i haven’t been reading, i haven’t been writing, i just haven’t been able to do anything for weeks now. i’ve been getting angry with my friends and the people i love the most, and it’s never justified so i swallow it. but i feel so cruel for being irritated by those i hold so close. i am so scared. i am so, so scared. i should be better, and i am in some areas, but overall things haven’t improved much for me internally. i don’t know. i just feel so separated from everything and everyone.

i live in the memories of the abuse and i truly don’t think i’ll ever get out

i have this terrible thing inside of me that is lodged in the back of my throat. it tears at me, constricts my breathing. i don't think it will ever go away. i am so tired. tired of being angry, tired of trying to be strong when i'm not, tired of being scared. i'm not living, i'm not here. i can't keep it together, i've been falling apart, when i was never even put together in the first place. will i be okay? will i stop crying in public? will this emptiness cease? i can't do this anymore, i can't live like this

Getting a Tumblr notification is like winning a scratch off ticket worth $5

I don’t know if people actually read my posts anymore but I apologize to those who do

Megan Nolan, from her novel titled "Acts of Desperation," originally published in March 2021

julianradwildlife

june 20th, 2024