Latest Posts by corvidaea - Page 4
"why do we even have that lever" is made funnier by the fact there are only 2 levers to begin with (disguised as a pair of tusks on a statue)
i find the implications hilarious:
kronk only had to remember the location of one lever, and couldn't even manage that
but on the other hand, it's easy to get two identical unlabelled levers confused, this one's on yzma tbh
yzma only needed to make one lever to begin with, but she actively chose to turn the second tusk into a functioning trapdoor. she could have just...just not connected the second tusk to anything. it didn't need to have a function
upon reflection, this also answers the question itself: "why do we even HAVE that lever?" it's because yzma herself specifically designed it as a booby trap. "why do we have that lever?" because yzma had it built to keep people out of her secret lair! yzma made the very purposeful choice to put that lever there! and then both she and her inept henchman immediately forgot about her own booby trap! yzma that is YOUR LEVER!!!!!
"tator" cards from a Milwaukee goodwill
take some time to notice your vision. see how easily you detect motion. focus on something in your peripheral (without moving your eyes to it). see how it works. look at your hands. pick something up with your fingers. appreciate how ridiculously specialized they are in fine motor skills (even if your personal motor skills are lackluster). think about how you have a body built to be an apex predator through use of tools. think about how the brain of your kind has created a digital hivemind uniting the whole world. now look back at the screen. look at the tab where you are in an argument about cartoons on tumblr. close the tab. open a new tab. google “tribute to anomalocaris”. watch the video that comes up. leave a like. subscribe even though the channel has been inactive for 8 years. you will need it in the coming times
I think we should have a turn of phrase for "I'm not in the right, but I AM annoyed with this situation, so I just need to go bitch to a friend about this before I suck it up and go do the right thing" because more and more I'm finding this is a critical element of functional adulthood.
I think more people need to learn the phrase "I don't know enough about that to have a strong opinion" its literally a cheat code for awkward conversations
*angry noot noot*
what are you even supposed to do when youre angry. cant scream at anyone cos im not a dick. cant break anything cos i paid money for that. cant rip my hair out cos i need it on my head. literally what now
I never thought about this, but I love it so much??
extended magical girl transformations are lovely and all, but there's something sort of romantic about a magical girl who transforms in an instantaneous flash of light.
imagine, a magical girl who transforms and detransforms when she's bored, or mildly stressed. sitting in a waiting room, flash, magical girl, flash, normal girl, flash, magical girl again, and so on. someone enters the room; flash, she's a mundane girl again. she realizes it's her enemy; flash, she's a magical girl again, and this time she has her sword.
real estate, richard siken (2020)
Phenomenal news. Just what the people ordered.
the way these strikes get framed is always so funny to me
"the strike could stretch on until the end of summer" or the execs could pay their workers
"there won't be ANY new shows because of this strike" or the execs could pay their workers
"no more content for us because the mean old writers and actors are-" OR THE EXECS COULD PAY THEIR WORKERS
I graduated high school in 99.
There was a student at our school named Wayne.
Wayne was gay. It was obvious. He was unable to stay in the closet even if he wanted to. To make matters worse, he was also Black. From a bullying standpoint, that was not a great combo. Both Black and white students made fun of him relentlessly. He was ostracized from the only community that may have given him protection. Only us theater kids stuck up for him, but not to significant effect.
Wayne was bullied so much that at one point he finally snapped and attacked his bullies with a lunch tray. I was actually seated in perfect line of sight and just sat there chewing my soggy fries in stunned silence. It didn't even seem real as I was witnessing it. The image of him wailing on his main bully as the food on his tray flew off is permanently logged into my long term memory.
The bully he attacked had blood all over his face and went straight to the nurse. Other than superficial cuts, he was not injured.
Before the attack, Wayne went to teachers for help. He went to guidance counselors for help. He went to the principals for help.
He did all of the things you were supposed to do. No one helped him. They wagged a finger at the bullies and warned them to stop.
Wayne's lunch tray melee was the only thing that worked. His bullies stayed far away from him. But a week later Wayne was expelled and the bullies were given no punishment.
So... no.
No one in my school talked about being trans.
Because the only way to survive being openly queer was to bash people with a lunch tray.
But one is a stranger, a woman she notices while she sits on a bench, gathering herself. It’s a type of woman she has never seen before, because there are no old women in Barbieland. When Barbie looks at her, she finds her beautiful and tells her so. The woman already knows. Suddenly Barbie, the fraught aspirational figure, has beheld someone she might aspire to be, and it is a radiantly content nonagenarian, reading a newspaper on a Los Angeles bench, who knows what she’s worth.
“The idea of a loving God who’s a mother, a grandmother — who looks at you and says, ‘Honey, you’re doing OK’ — is something I feel like I need and I wanted to give to other people,” Gerwig says. When it was suggested that this scene, which Gerwig calls a “transaction of grace,” might be cut for time, she remembers thinking: “If I cut that scene, I don’t know why I’m making this movie. If I don’t have that scene, I don’t know what it is or what I’ve done.”
BARBIE (2023) dir. Greta Gerwig +⭐letterboxd reviews by men
For whatever reason you’re in the closet, you deserve to enjoy pride!
Feel uncomfortable going to Cheesecake Factory when it’s so under the watch of the eye of Sauron
the waiting game sucks
I was playing Assassin’s Creed: Origins last night (61 hours in, level 31. Not sure how far I am into the story) and I tamed this hippo, because I thought it would be amusing to have a giant hippo waddling around with me. I named them Hungry Hungry the Hippo, because I am perfect.
I have this cool chain assassination skill, so I like to wait for Romans to ride by in a line, grab the one at the end and follow up with the one in the middle before any of them realize what’s going on. More often than not, the one in the front keeps on going and doesn’t notice his two buddies aren’t with him.
(SIDEBAR: Unless you want to kill an entire village, don’t poison the corpses. I’m real sorry about that, formerly-populated tiny village against the mountains.)
But last night, the guy in the front turned around and threw a spear at me … which REALLY PISSED OFF Hungry Hungry the Hippo, who charged the guy, knocked him off his horse, and proceeded to murder the fuck out of him.
So I’m like, “Hungry Hungry the Hippo, you are such a good friend! Thanks for helping me fill the streets with the blood of my enemies. I’m going to set you free to celebrate!”
And that’s when I discovered that Hungry Hungry the Hippo has two states: tamed and aggro. I was like, “Here you go,” and she was like “THANK YOU NOW I WILL MURDER YOUR FACE TO DEATH!”
I want to tell you that I ran away and climbed up a tree or something, until she calmed down and went on her way. But we all know that wouldn’t be true, and Bayek needed some hard leather to upgrade his armor, anyway.
So I thanked Hungry Hungry the Hippo for her service and sacrifice, looted the corpses, and went about my business.
Every villain is the hero of their own story.
woke up today and realized that tumblr entirely killed fuck ya life bing bong so here ya go again
Parasite and Girl
all you suckers are spending $70 on totk but not me I’m emulating it on tumblr
Man, this is 100% not a cult... /s
CNN’s Randi Kaye interviewed several Trump fans outside his Doral resort hours before ex-President Donald Trump’s arraignment — including one who said she’ll vote for Trump even if he’s in jail.
Kaye has been reporting live from Doral ahead of Trump’s first appearance in court on 37 counts related to violations of the Espionage Act, which is set for Tuesday afternoon.
On Tuesday morning’s edition of CNN This Morning, Kaye described Trump’s mood Monday night as “upbeat,” and described a chaotic scene outside Doral Tuesday morning between Trump supporters and protesters and police.
A short comic I made about my experiences as a seasonal worker, and the way places change you.
I think this is an incredibly important video to watch
yoshi_tattooer
Another day of being out here in Albany buying up as many politicians as we can-- It's just good business when you are in the business of Fossil Fuels.
We do Gaslighting, we do Greenwashing, and we delay planet-saving climate action.
Extinction 4 All! D4FF.org
Production houses: but if the writers stay on strike we can't guarantee the future safety of your favorite shows 🥺🥺😭😭
Viewers who 1, have already lost their favorite shows because they were cancelled in spite of good ratings and good reviews or 2, have stopped watching new content entirely until the entire series has aired and concluded as a result of so many good shows getting cancelled on cliffhangers and thus leaving said viewers unable to gain closure with those characters and with a hollow viewing experience, so they've begun a, watching older shows they know came to a planned conclusion or b, revisiting their old favorites and enjoying the nostalgia or c, reading new books or fanfic instead: YOU ALREADY CAN'T GUARANTEE THE FUTURE OF OUR SHOWS SO GET FUCKING WRECKED AND PAY WRITERS WHAT THEY DESERVE!
McCarthy's infinite stupidity can only survive in Republican politics.