Coolest Kid To Ever Exist

Peter Parker fresh new bat kid: Excuse me mister Batman sir, I don’t mean to bother you right now, but the kitchen sink is broken, and it’s totally my bad, I just woke up and brushed my teeth and the handle snapped off. I forget to dial down my strength sometimes when I wake up especially because we were out patrolling really late last night. Do you think Alfred would be mad I fixed it for him? I felt guilty fixing it and not saying anything and I just wanted to make sure that someone knew what I did.

Bruce used to Dick, Jason, Tim, Steph, Cass, Duke, and Damian: Is it sunny today in Gotham? That can happen?

talia al ghul being synonymous with fashion icon mmmhmm…..

Lee jihye

the bill is going to be crazy 😭😭 all i can think about is how long the receipt will be

More Peter in Gotham 'cause I had a thought

After a mission

Red hood: I need a drink, anyone else?

Nightwing: Only if you are paying!

Red Robin: I have reports I still need to finish.

Red Hood: Okay, and you Spider-man?

Spiderman, a minor still: Oh! Uh, I'm not-

Red Hood: Come on, it will be fun! Besides, we rarely see you outside of fights!

Spider-Man: Ye- yeah, sure I guess..

Red Hood: Awesome! Let's go!

Later

Red Hood: He's 30 shots in, wtf!

Nightwing: Give 'im ten more! Has ta start kicking in some time!

Spider-Man who can't get drunk thanks to his fucked up dna: Ah, no thanks! This is already going to cost a lot..

Red Hood: I don't care how much I have to spend as long as I can get you drunk!

Idk. This was a stupid thought 💀 I might delete this later

Alfred gets sick of Bruce breaking and losing stuff on patrol so he gets a label maker and starts naming items after the kids

Alfred: I got you a new phone, just like you asked. Its name is Jason. Try not to let it die.

Bruce, tearing up: Why would you say that—

that’s it, that’s the whole post

Now I can’t stop. I’m condemned to draw Damian and Capybaras forever

i am literally in love with this

Since we all agree that people of the Alley of Crime adore Red Hood and believe in him, I think it is time to imagine Jason in a scene similar to the one from OG Spiderman, where his identity is accidentally outted in front of crowd of people, and they all are just choose to protect him and help him out.

So maybe Gotham is facing especially nasty trouble, and vigilantes are on the receiving end this time. So maybe Jason is thrown at the dirty Alley in his part of town, wounded, with helmet flying off, and there is just a crowd of people staring as bleeds out, astonished. And Jason thinks, oh, that's the end — he can go and shoot himself, honestly, because he just failed the man rule every vigilante have: never show your face, never reveal your identity.

But people are... helping him? His eyes are half-open, breath laboured and pained, but all he hears is gentle murmuring:

'God, he is just a kid...'

'He must be younger than my son.'

'Poor child...'

He feels soft elderly hand against his cheek as someone from the crowd, an ex nurse, comes closer to bandage his injuries, while a kid, barely with the size of his helmet, brings it back, sticking out their tongue as they try to place it back on his head, to hide his face.

'It is okay,' the old woman reassures him. 'You are safe with us, son. We hadn't seen anything.'

Jason's eyes sting, because, oh.

It is his people. He loves them. He will die for them.

And they love him just as much.

He still waits for someone to out him, though. But the week ends, the villain is out of the picture, and no one says a thing. The only proof that it ever happened is civilians, who keep waving at Jason — not Red Hood, just Jason — when their paths cross somewhere in the shops or streets.

And that's how he knows that it is them; it is them, and they keep him safe as much as he keeps safe them.

im obsessed with the idea that gothamites 100% know who all the batkids are, like “ for sure Dick Grayson is nightwing #thebuttsmatch” and they figured out all their identities and who it correlates to, “ofc the newest robin with all the swords is Damian Wayne!!” but they refuse to even consider Bruce and The Batman being the same guy. it just doesn’t make sense?? Brucie Wayne, dressing up as a bat and calling himself vengeance???? as if???? also he’s from bristol???? can’t possibly be Brucie. Like they genuinely believe that Bruce is the father to a whole gaggle of themed vigilantes and just doesn’t know it. Anytime his kids disappear during a gala, he gets a bunch of pitiful looks and he can’t leave bc everyone’s looking at him now??

This actually works into a lot of ppls theories that Brucie is The Batman’s sugar daddy, bc clearly they’re together and co parenting the batkids??

I’m just gonna leave this here.

(I watched Spider-Man: Homecoming last night.)