Don’t kill yourself today
Because your Netflix trial still has a week left
Don’t kill yourself today
Because no one else will finish off the chicken in the fridge
Don’t kill yourself today
Because I know for a fact that Starbucks is releasing a new Frappuccino sometime next month
Yes, your mother will miss you
Yes your bully will make a sappy Facebook post about how what a a wonderful person you were
And yes
Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem
You know that
You’ve known that
Everyone and anyone has been shoving that down your throat since they first learned what the word suicide meant
So don’t kill yourself
Until you finish your shampoo and conditioner at the same time
Don’t kill yourself
Until Doctor Who is finally cancelled
Don’t kill yourself
Until you tell someone your best pasta recipe
Don’t kill yourself
Because I will keep coming up with reasons for you not to
And I need you
To hear all of them
Don’t kill yourself
I love you
You’re important
It’s a bad day
Not a bad life
There is more to this
The world will keep spinning on its axis without you
But
Think of all the sunrises you’d miss
I know this sounds pointless
But when you’re sitting in front of everything deadly you own
Revising your goodbyes
There will be too much darkness
To see anything else
But this is not about seeing anything else
This is about turning off the lights
This is about finding the bed instead of the noose
This is about giving yourself one more day
Even if it takes ten thousand of those
One more morning’s
Until
“I can’t wait for tomorrow”
This is about staying alive
Because there’s gonna be a new Marvel movie
No one should miss that
This is about staying alive
Because the future is coming
And it’s ready for you
I don’ t need you to see it
I just need you to believe you can make it
Until then
- Hannah Dains
If you don't know this, go away
Tony was almosts asleep when his phone started blaring ‘Perfect’ by Ed Sheeran. That was the ringtone he set for Peter. Was he hallucinating? Why would Peter be calling him? Scrambling for his phone, he answers it.
“H-hello?” Amazingly, his voice sounded steadier than he felt.
“Tony?”
“Peter. You’re real.” His voice was as soft as Peter’s was.
“ Of course I’m real.” The tiniest bit of a smile shone through the younger man’s voice. “I know I was an ass to you and I don’t blame you if you hate me but do you think...You could come up here?”
“Peter...I don’t hate you.”
There is silence for a moment.
“Can you come up here?” Peter’s voice wavers a little. “Please? I need to see you.”
“I’m on my way.”
“Thank you.”
Tony pulls on his shoes and looks around for his keys.
Tony?”
“Yes love?” Tony asked, sliding out his door and locking it.
“Can…..can you stay on the line until you get here? You’re voice is comforting. It’s the one thing that I have from before.”
Tony doesn’t have an answer for that. He just wanted to hold Peter and never let him go.
“Yeah, I’ll stay on the line. So talk to me. How are you feeling? Are they treating you okay?”
“I’m starting to get feeling in my leg again, which hurts like hell by the way but painkillers are a blessing. I’ve noticed there are a lot of redheads here. Oh and Dr. Romanova says I can start PT in a few days so I suppose that’s good.”
Tony chuckles a little.
“Have you met T’Challa King yet?”
“Oh yeah! He’s nice.”
“His sister works in plastics. I think you two would get along.”
“Maybe I’ll meet her. I seem to be meeting a lot of people. I met a guy from peds today.”
“Guy from peds?”
“Big guy. Kinda scary looking. Ex cop with a fake arm that’s all doodled up?”
“Ah. Bucky. Don’t let how he looks scare you. He’s a big softie, especially around Steve.”
“Steve? The guy who helped him?”
“Peter, Steve and Bucky are engaged. Theirs is the wedding I invited you to.”
“Oh! That’s sweet. So when do I get to meet Steve then? It’s only fair if I meet both halves of the couple. And they are friends of yours so it's fair right?” Peter babbles a little
“I’ll see if I can set something up. We’ll do lunch or something. How does that sound?”
“Only if you want to. I don’t want to impose.”
“I’m sure they’d love to. Steve has already asked twice. He’s kinda old fashioned in his ways. He wants to take us out and pay forit himself. He’s such a dad but it’s sweet.”
“Well okay….If he insists.”
Tony smiles. “Well I can’t exactly argue with my boss.”
“Yeah that is true.”
Tony pulls into the parking lot and turns his car off.
“Do you want me to bring you something from the cafeteria?” He asked, suddenly remembering he hadn’t eaten all day.
“Um….not fish sticks.”
“I see you talked to Wanda.”
“Yeah. She’s really nice.”
“That she is. How does grilled cheese sound?”
“That sounds amazing. And a hot chocolate?’
“Your wish is my command.”
“You are the best.”
“Yes so I’ve been told.”
“Hurry up here. I really wanna see you.”
“I’ll be there soon. I gotta hang up now so I can order okay?”
“Okay bye. See you soon.”
Tony heads up to Peter’s room, sandwich in hand. On his way, he spots a familiar streak of white hair.
“Stephen!” He calls.
Stephen stops and looks over at him. His face goes through a whole range of emotions that Tony couldn’t quite read. He sets the chart down and makes his way over.
“So I take it you’re feeling better?”
“Yeah. Thanks for letting me stay over.”
“It’s no problem. I’d rather know you were safe than dead in a ditch somewhere.”
Tony nods a little.
“So what are you doing here?”
“Oh, I’m actually here to see Peter.”
“Peter?”
Tony grins widely.
“Yeah. He called and asked me to come up.”
“Oh. That’s wonderful.” Stephen smiles a little, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.
“Okay, what happened last night?” Tony asked, worried. “Did I do something stupid? Did we do something-”
Stephen raised a hand, shutting Tony up.
“No, we didn’t do anything. You wanted attention and I sent you to bed but instead of going to the guest room, you decided to sleep in my bed. So I slept in the guest room.”
Tony’s smile fell. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to put you out.” “I’m not worried about it. You were drunk so I saw no point in arguing with you.”
“Yeah. I am an unreasonable drunk.”
“Don’t flatter yourself Antony. You’re always unreasonable.” Stephen teases, seeming to relax a little.
“Well I think that depends on who you ask.”
Stephen rolls his eyes and pats Tony’s back. “Go on. He’s waiting for you.”
“I’ll talk to you later?” He asked, turning to go to Peter’s room.
“I’ll be here.”
-----.-----
Peter looks up with a careful smile as Tony enters his room.
“Tony.” He breathes softly, wanting to reach for the older man but holds back.
Tony however, moved to sit beside him and hands over the burger with a smile.
“I missed you Peter.” Tony says, breaking the silence. That made the dam inside Peter break wide open.
“Tony I’m so sorry. I snapped at you and it was wrong. I was an idiot and I shouldn’t have said those things. None of this is your fault. It’s my own fau-”
“I’m going to stop you right there.” Tony says, leaning over with a tiny smile. “Peter, I don’t blame you for acting the way you did. Hell, if I were in your situation, I’d probably be worse.”
Peter opens his mouth to protest again but Tony leans over and kisses him gently, effectively shutting him up. When Tony pulled away, Peter stared at him.
“Is this going to be a thing now? You kissing me to shut me up?”
“Hm. Yes, I think it is.”
Peter blushed a little. “O-oh. Okay.”
“So have I missed much?”
“No, not really. Though I do have a question.”
“Ask away.” Tony props his feet on the edge of the bed and smiles.
“Nurse King wouldn’t happen to be related to Shuri King, would he?”
Tony sits up straight in surprise. “You know her?”
“She’s dating a friend of mine.” Peter grins. “Michelle Jones.”
“Ah well I don’t know Shuri to well, but I do know she’s a great person.”
“Oh yeah. She’s super sweet. The two of them are great together except when they get pissed off. Then it’s scary.”
Tony laughs softly again and sits up to take Peter’s hand in his own. He intwines their fingers and looks up into Peter’s eyes. He could listen to the younger man talk for hours.
“What about you? What have you been up too since I flew off the handle.”
“Well I worked in the ER and did a surgery or two.”
“Anything interesting?”
“A guy had a branch go through his leg.”
“Anything else?”
“Um….I got drunk and ended up at Stephen’s house?”
Peter giggles a little. “Is there something that happens often?”
“Me gettin drunk or me going to bother Stephen?”
“Both? EIther one?”
“I don’t drink a whole lot anymore. I used to be an alcoholic and I realized that was just like my father and I don’t want to do that. As for me bothering Stephen,” Tony smirks. “I do that as often as I can.”
“So do I get to meet this Stephen?”
“Do you want me to go get him?” Tony asked, moving to get up.
Peter makes grabby hands at Tony, stopping him from getting up. “I don’t want to bother him. I don’t want to be a bother.” He catches his bottom lip between his teeth.
Tony chuckles a little. “Don’t worry. I’m pretty sure he isn’t doing anything right now. It’s late and most people are sleeping.”
“Are you sure?”
Tony runs his fingers along Peter’s lip, gently pulling it free from his teeth.
“You’ll get blisters.” He says softly. “And yeah. Just give me a minute.”
Pressing a kiss to Peter’s head, Tony stands and leaves the room. Heading back towards the nurse’s station, he looks around for Stephen. Not seeing him, he heads for an on-call room. He hears the sound of soft crying through the cracked door and peeks in, concerned.
“Hello?” He calls.
-----.-----
Stephen watches Tony head towards Peter’s room and smiles softly. It was good that Tony was so happy again. He finishes his rounds and finds an empty on-call room. He pauses by the young ex-performers room. Tony looked so peaceful talking to him. It was something Stephen hadn’t seen in a while. He enters the room and sits on one of the beds. As he sits in the dark, his thoughts seem to settle around him. His mind goes back to the kiss and Stephen squeezes his eyes shut tight, feeling heat rise in his face. If it was any other circumstance, he’d be giddy with joy. Though maybe this could help him get over his feelings. Except it didn't. It just confused him more. He knew Tony would never feel that way about him but the words kept repeating in his head.
“I need you…..”
“You’re my best friend….”
Putting one hand over his eyes, he feels the tears slip out, making hot tracks down his cheeks. Sometimes a man just needs a good cry. Stephen did have a terrible habit of burying his feels deep inside. He hears the door creak and jumped up, realizing he hadn’t shut the door all the way.
“Hello?” A soft voice called.
“Tony?” Stephen’s voice cracked a little and he winces. He hurriedly wipes his face and takes a deep breath. “Did you need something?”
“I’m turning on the lights.” Tony warns before flipping them on. Stephen hisses at the sudden flood of bright lights.
“Stephen.” Tony moved closer, sitting beside him. “What’s wrong?”
Stephen shakes his head and clears his throat. “It’s nothing. I’m just tired is all.”
“That’s bullshit and you know it.” Tony counters,
“Do you need something Tony or did you come to annoy me?”
Tony glares at him. “You aren’t getting out of this. We are going to talk later. But yes, I actually want something.”
“Well I’m waiting.”
“Peter wants to meet you.”
“Me? Why?” Stephen asked, shocked.
“Uh because you are one of my best friends?”
“I….see.”
“Please will you please just come meet him? He’s really important to me.”
Stephen knew full well he could never tell Tony no. He sighs and nods. “Only for a few moments though because I actually would like to sleep in my own bed tonight.”
“Great. Come on.” Tony gets up and leads him out.
Once they got to the room, Stephen took one look at Peter, who was all bright smiles and greetings, and couldn’t help but smile.
“Hello. My name is Stephen Strange.”
“You helped fix my leg!”
Stephen nods. “Yes, I did.”
“Thank you a lot.”
“Well I’m just happy to help.” Stephen says, relaxing a bit.
“So….do all the neurosurgeons here have pretty eyes and nice hair?” Peter blurts, his face flushing.
Tony gives Steve a look, a dopey smile on his face.
“Well, not as far as I know but don’t tell me I’m going to have to fight my best friend for your attention.” Tony teases. Stephen pants Tony’s shoulder.
“Don’t worry. He isn't my type. No offence Peter.”
“None taken!” Peter stammered a bit. “You aren’t really my type either.”
“So if Peter isn’t your type, who is?” Tony questions with that damn quirked eyebrow of his.
Stephen shrugged, stopping himself from saying what automatically popped into his head.
“Ah well, you’re find someone who I deem good enough for you.” Tony grins.
“Yeah, we’ll see.”
@senpaiemibrastowski
Boys and girls of every age
Wouldn’t you like to see something strange?
Come with us and you will see
This, our town of Halloween
This is Halloween
This is Halloween
Pumpkins scream in the dead of night 🎃
This is Halloween
Everybody make a scene
Trick or treat till the neighbors gonna die of fright
It’s our town
Everybody scream
In this town of Halloween
I am the one hiding under your bed 🛌
Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red
I am the one hiding under your stairs
Fingers like snakes 🐍 and spiders 🕷 in my hair
This is Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
In this town
We call home
Everyone hail to the pumpkin song
In this town
Don’t we love it now?
Everybody’s waiting for the next surprise
’Round that corner, man hiding in the trash can 🗑
Something’s waiting, no, to pounce,
And
How
You’ll
Scream!
This is Halloween
Red ‘n’ black, and slimy green
Aren’t you scared?
Well, that’s just fine
Say it once, say it twice
Take a chance and roll the dice 🎲🎲
Ride with the moon in the dead of night 🌕
Everybody scream
Everybody scream
In our town of Halloween!
I am the clown with the tear-away face 🤡
Here in a flash and gone without a trace
I am the “who” when you call, “Who’s there?”
I am the wind blowing through your hair 🌬
I am the shadow on the moon at night 🌑
Filling your dreams to the brim with fright
This is Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Tender lumplings everywhere
Life’s no fun without a good scare
That’s our job, but we’re not mean
In our town of Halloween
In this town
Don’t we love it now?
Everybody’s waiting for the next surprise
Skeleton Jack might catch you in the back 💀
And scream like a banshee
Make you
Jump
Out
Of
Your
Skin! ☠️
This is Halloween
Everybody scream
Won’t ya please make way for a very special guy?
Our man Jack is King of the Pumpkin patch
Everyone hail to the Pumpkin King, now!
This is Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
Halloween
In this town we call home
Everyone hail to the pumpkin song
I got in trouble for writing gay porn fanfiction in physics. Again
191
a
“Anderson, don’t talk out loud. You lower the IQ of the whole street.”-Sherlock “Shut up everybody, shut up! Don’t move, don’t speak, don’t breathe, I’m trying to think. Anderson, face the other way, you’re putting me off”-Sherlock I find it funny how I know a guy named Anderson and he's and idiot. These quotes remind me of him.
idk about u guys but im pretty gay for jennifer jareau
at least if tony and cap die in a4 then rdj and chris evans can go rogue and release a tape of them in full costume making out
Peter was sitting on his bed reading when there was a knock on the door frame, causing him to startle and look up. Stephen Strange stood there, looking nervous. The look seemed strangely out of place on the man’s face.
“I don’t mean to disturb you but I was wondering if we could get to know one another, as you are dating my best friend.” He sounded unsure and Peter found it endearing.
Peter closed his book and smiles. “Yeah, come on in.” He folds his good leg under his injured one and watches Stephen cross the room. “What’s on your mind?” He asks.
“Well,” Stephen takes a seat and folded his arms. “People are idiots.” He says bluntly, making Peter laugh.
“Care to expand on that?”
“There was this guy in the ER today who did body shots off of a complete stranger and got piece of glass stuck up his nose and didn’t realize until three days later and it had moved up to his eye socket.”
Peter winces. “Oh my god. Gross.”
“Gross indeed.” Stephen laughs and shakes his head. “How do you not realize you have glass up your nose?”
“Well some people are dumb.” Peter remarks, shifting and wincing a little. “Sonofabitch.” He hisses.
“Try bending your knee a few times every hour. You’re not moving it enough and it’s getting stiff. If you let it get to stiff, the work you’re doing with Natasha is only going to hurt more.” The older man suggests, standing up. “May I?”
Peter stared at him blankly for a moment, before he realized what was happening. “Uh, yeah. Okay? Sure.”
Stephen slowly wraps his hands around Peter’s leg, on either side of his knee.
“This is going to hurt.” He warns before slowly bending the leg. Peter gasped loudly and reaches to stop him but Stephen shoos his hand away. “Let me help you.”
Peter lays back and closes his eyes, tightening his jaw.
“Talk to me Peter. It may distract you.”
“About what?” Peter’s voice raises an octave when the rods touched a little.
“Sorry sorry.” Stephen releases his leg and lays it flat. “Tony?”
“What about Tony?”
“Anything. I have many stories and can answer questions if you want?”
“Okay but I do have a question for you.”
“Fire away.”
“How come you or Steve haven’t threatened me yet? You are his best friends right? I don’t get a whole ‘you hurt him and I’ll kill you and make it look natural’?”
Stephen laughs at that. “I take it Pepper hasn’t come to visit you yet.” Then his face sobers. “But do keep in mind that I am a brain surgeon, Nat is helping you learn to walk again and Pepper and Steve are trauma surgeons. You do not want to piss off a bunch of doctors.”
Peter gaped at him for a moment then breaks into a grin. “That’s what I was waiting for.”
“Also remember that both Steve and Bucky are ex military so they don’t take kindly to someone hurting one of their own.” Stephen takes his seat again. “But I’m honestly not worried because you make Tony really happy and you’re good for him.”
Peter is quiet for a few minutes after that. “I’m glad because I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. He’s amazing.”
“Yes, he really is.”
“So you said you have stories? Care to tell me some?”
“One time, during our internship, Tony swallowed a needle to prove he was a badass.”
“Why in hell?” Though, thinking about it, that does sound like something that Tony would do.
“He likes to show off a bit. He doesn’t need to though. Anyone who has met him can tell that he’s the best at what he does.”
“He really is amazing, I’m surprised that he is dating me when he can do better.”
“It’s because he’s drawn to you. He loves you so much. I’ve known him for years now. When you’re around, his smile is brighter and his eyes sparkle. You have a magical effect on him.”
Peter listens quietly and something dawns on him. He’d talk to Tony about it later.
“I haven’t felt this way about anyone in…..ever. I mean, yeah I’ve had crushes and relationships before but this….it feels real. It feels perminate.”
”Maybe it’s fate.”
“Maybe so. I hope so.”
-----.-----
Tony finished his rounds and makes his way to the cafeteria to get a coffee. He had been on his feet for over twenty four hours and honestly he just wanted a break. He gets a straight black coffee, which is nasty but does keep him awake. He sips at the bitter liquid and slowly strolled the now empty halls. He comes to a stop outside Peter’s room and smiles. The younger man was sitting up, slowly bending his leg at the knee.
He waits until Peter stops messing with his leg and then knocks on the doorframe. Peter looks at him and grins.
“Tony. I missed you.”
Tony moves forward, dropping the empty cup in the trash before approaching the bed and pressing a kiss to Peter’s forehead. Peter tilts his head up.
“Give me a real kiss.” He demands. Tony found it so adorable that he couldn’t say no and leaned down, pressing a tender kiss to Peter’s lips. Peter makes a soft noise, pulling Tony closer, so the doctor was braced with one knee up on the bed and his hands on Peter’s face. The kiss deepens, a mix of harsh breath, teeth and tongue.
The sudden loud beeping of Peter’s heart monitor scared the hell out of Tony and he jerked back. Peter looks sheepish and the two locked eyes before bursting out with laughter.
“So” Tony says, once he got himself under control. “Is that going to be a norm for us?”
“Hopefully not while I’m hooked up to machines. That’s very unsexy.”
“I think you always look sexy.”
Peter blushes and grins doopily.
“I think you look sexy always too. Even now with messy hair and a five o’clock shadow.” He says fondly, reaching up to rubs his thumb across Tony’s cheekbone. Tony nuzzles the hand and kisses the thumb.
“Anything interesting happen today?”
“I talked to Stephen today. A guy got glass up his nose from body shots.” Peter shudders.
“That’s nasty.”
“Well I think it was a college student. If not, then that’s just sad.”
Tony laughs. “You were a collage student once.”
“I wasn’t dumb enough to do body shots off a stranger.”
“Did you do anything dumb in college?”
Peter blushes and looks away, mumbling a little.
“I didn’t catch that. Care to repeat it louder?”
“Iwasastripperforayearandahalftopayforschool.”
Tony blinks as he deciphers what was just word vomited at him.
“Wait really?”
Peter nods, looking as if he wanted to disappear.
“I think that’s hot as hell. I wish I could have seen it.”
“”Well I was quite popular.”
“Did you have a stripper name?” Tony raises an eyebrow and leans forward on his hands.
“I was….SpiderMan. Because of the way I could climb the entire pole easily and hang upside down. And I could dance with ropes.”
Tony is quiet as he ponders this. “I wonder if anyone has videos….”
“Please don’t go looking. It was cringy!”
“All the more reason to look for it.” Tony teases.
“Tony!” Peter whines.
“Alright, alright fine. I won’t go looking.” He was interrupted mid sentence with a yawn.
“Come lay with me.” Peter says suddenly.
“You sure?”
“You look dead on your feet and I wanna snuggle.”
Tony looked as if he wanted to argue but thought better and climbs up onto the bed. Once he was settled, Peter was snuggled into his side and closes his eyes with a content smile. As happy as he looked, something nagged in the back of his mind.
Stephen Strange is in love with Tony. How was Peter supposed to compete with that?
my active blog: @video-killed-the-radio-host
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