It's The Witching Hour And.. What's This?? My Window Is Open..?? Oh Gee.. I Really Hope A Sexy French

What is bomb diggity

My sister had me look for her heat protectant spray and I opened a drawer and found a spray bottle labeled 'sex toy cleaner' dawg I'm CRYING WHY WOULDNT YOU JUST USE SOAP AND WATER I AM CERTAIN THAT SPRAY IS NOT ENOUGH TO CLEAN IT

I ate a gigantic chicken sandwich and now my heart is beating weird I'm scared

Me n bro making fun of someone 2 feet away with our eyes

@prettyboyschmidt

also

i was uber late to school cuz my bus simply did not come so another bus driver that had finished his route saw me standing at my stop looking like i was about to cry and took me to school so thanks to that guy he was cool

I miss those one lemon girl scout cookies the savannah smiles bring those hoes back

One time I was pooping and pushed really hard and the lower half of my body went numb and I puked

Me when I spend 3 days listening to this musical nonstop only to accidentally learn EVERYONE ELSES LINES BUT MY OWN

I wonder if people make small talk during prostate exams. I feel like it would be awkward if nobody said anything